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Old 08-25-2015, 05:48 PM
 
Location: the Great Lakes states
796 posts, read 2,074,322 times
Reputation: 529

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Quote:
Originally Posted by williameconnors View Post
So I know this is s pretty old post. But I'm hoping that you still receive the messages. We relocated to the north west suburbs from Pittsburgh Pa about a year ago. We have yet to meet anyone since we moved here. I feel I'm very outgoing and have tried talking to everyone. My wife and daughter even done some baby groups. I got sent here for a promotion and love it. But because we have met no one it's really taking a tool on my wife and she wants to move back. Any suggestions?
I'm finding this to be true all over the midwest. Because of work, I've lived in four different cities since 2011 (however one of those cities for three years) and only came away with one good friend. It seems to be harder than ever to start friendships.

People seem to be exceptionally private, and stay inside even during the best of weather. I know no one wants the opposite (busybodies and people lingering outside the apartments all the time) but this seems extreme on the other side, and its not good either. Growing up we were always outside and we enjoyed the common areas, the front porch, the front yards in our Chicago and Oak Lawn neighborhoods.
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Old 08-26-2015, 05:47 AM
 
Location: Chicago
2,883 posts, read 3,843,606 times
Reputation: 2743
It's hard making friends as an adult and it takes time. I started a new job recently and 1 person seemed almost desperate to be my friend which really put me off. There was a reason she was desperate and I'm glad I kept thems friendly but professional.
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Old 08-26-2015, 06:13 AM
 
Location: Chicago
5,412 posts, read 8,281,590 times
Reputation: 6347
I think it helps to seek out other transplants in the area by joining Newcomers clubs, meet ups, church groups, etc. as IMO they are more open to meeting new people than those who grew up here and already have their established friend circles.
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Old 08-27-2015, 06:08 AM
 
382 posts, read 649,955 times
Reputation: 336
I have found that most people I meet here have lived here their whole lives, have their families here, and existing friendship s here. Therefore, they aren't really looking to necessarily make new friends like a transplant would. I'm also a transplant and it's taken a lot of effort. In a lot if ways it's like living in a small town. When I lived in the city I found it better in this regard.
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Old 08-30-2015, 09:12 PM
 
5 posts, read 6,544 times
Reputation: 16
What suburb are you in? We just relocated and are also looking for friends for us and our daughter! =]
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Old 09-02-2015, 09:09 PM
 
Location: Houston, Tx. USA
65 posts, read 185,021 times
Reputation: 94
Interesting that I came across this thread. I was just now outside, in the driveway of the house in the Houston, Tx. area where I've lived for 22 years, thinking about how I don't really know any of my neighbors. When we moved in, I went around introducing myself. Every time someone new moves onto the street, I go over & welcome them, introducing myself. I know a few 1st names, the next door neighbor's last name, & nobody's phone number. (Is it my breath?)

I compared that to the 5 1/2 years I lived in Algonquin, Il. I knew all the neighbors, their names, kids' names, phone numbers, etc. When there was a death in my family, even neighbors I only knew to say Hi to came over with meals, & cards, & offering to help however they could. Shortly after that, I moved here to be near family. Everyone came over to say good bye & wish me well.

The upshot is, my experience of the NW 'burbs/exurbs is the opposite of the OP. It's one of many reasons I'm hoping to come back to Il. where MY experience is of much friendlier people.
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Old 09-06-2015, 01:20 PM
 
Location: the Great Lakes states
796 posts, read 2,074,322 times
Reputation: 529
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pegs56 View Post
Interesting that I came across this thread. I was just now outside, in the driveway of the house in the Houston, Tx. area where I've lived for 22 years, thinking about how I don't really know any of my neighbors. When we moved in, I went around introducing myself. Every time someone new moves onto the street, I go over & welcome them, introducing myself. I know a few 1st names, the next door neighbor's last name, & nobody's phone number. (Is it my breath?)

I compared that to the 5 1/2 years I lived in Algonquin, Il. I knew all the neighbors, their names, kids' names, phone numbers, etc. When there was a death in my family, even neighbors I only knew to say Hi to came over with meals, & cards, & offering to help however they could. Shortly after that, I moved here to be near family. Everyone came over to say good bye & wish me well.

The upshot is, my experience of the NW 'burbs/exurbs is the opposite of the OP. It's one of many reasons I'm hoping to come back to Il. where MY experience is of much friendlier people.
It was like this on the southwest side of Chicago in the '70s, '80s, and '90s. We knew everyone on our block, and beyond. We kept in touch with our old neighbors for many years after we moved.
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Old 09-06-2015, 02:10 PM
 
Location: the Great Lakes states
796 posts, read 2,074,322 times
Reputation: 529
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pegs56 View Post
I compared that to the 5 1/2 years I lived in Algonquin, Il. I knew all the neighbors, their names, kids' names, phone numbers, etc. When there was a death in my family, even neighbors I only knew to say Hi to came over with meals, & cards, & offering to help however they could. Shortly after that, I moved here to be near family. Everyone came over to say good bye & wish me well.

The upshot is, my experience of the NW 'burbs/exurbs is the opposite of the OP. It's one of many reasons I'm hoping to come back to Il. where MY experience is of much friendlier people.
I just posted my story in the General U.S. forum, it relates, so I thought you or some of the other readers of this post might be interested:

I miss neighborhoods where people sit outside and socialize
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