Highland Park snobbery? (Naperville, Northbrook, Geneva: renters, house, to buy)

[Sunsmile]

We have recently moved to Highland Park - we are renting a house there, planning to buy something next year. We chose Highland Park because of the following: close to work, good schools, Jewish presence (we are Jewish), prestigious, close to the lake, Ravinia & Botanic garden, charming architecture, great Downtown.

However, I'm absolutely astounded by the number of snobs I've encountered in Highland Park during the few months we've been here! Most people here just don't seem very friendly to newcomers... I try to be friendly and open, and just get a bad vibe in return.

This is not the first time I have relocated, so it's not just "new to the area" thing.

Am I nuts? Is it just me? Is Highland Park really full of snobs? Any inside info?

[chitown85]

Where did you relocate from?

[lincolnparker]

I guess thats the difference between new money and old money. New money places like Barrington wont be so snobish to newcomers.

Originally Posted by Sunsmile

We have recently moved to Highland Park - we are renting a house there, planning to buy something next year. We chose Highland Park because of the following: close to work, good schools, Jewish presence (we are Jewish), prestigious, close to the lake, Ravinia & Botanic garden, charming architecture, great Downtown.

However, I'm absolutely astounded by the number of snobs I've encountered in Highland Park during the few months we've been here! Most people here just don't seem very friendly to newcomers... I try to be friendly and open, and just get a bad vibe in return.

This is not the first time I have relocated, so it's not just "new to the area" thing.

Am I nuts? Is it just me? Is Highland Park really full of snobs? Any inside info?

[chet everett]

I think this has a lot less to do with age of the money than age of the people. I have heard from many newcomers to HP that the older folks are just not particularly warm / social to the younger folks. There are lots of factors, including the fact that the younger people tend to have kids in schools / activities that are not very interesting to the older folks, the "driving up prices" factor, the cultural differences (many older Jewish residents have a more old world mindset about much of from everyday life to religious preferences), to the natural 'prickliness' that older folks in general are known for.

The best advice I have heard to overcome this is to find people like yourselves in HP -- if you have school age children that is often an excellent way to get to know other parents. If not there are plenty of opportunities to utilize the various recreational / cultural amenities of the area.

BTW -- When I was landlord (not in HP, but a town with some similar characteristics) the home owners that lived near my rental were ALWAYS suspicious of renters -- you have to realize that your rent may be ORDERS OF MAGNITUDE greater than they paid to BUY their house decades ago and that is something that gnaws at people. Further, as you indicate, when you do buy it means you will only be in the rental for a short time and may move to a very different part of town so they have no incentive to be especially neighborly...


Good Luck!

[Anthera]

Originally Posted by chet everett

I think this has a lot less to do with age of the money than age of the people. I have heard from many newcomers to HP that the older folks are just not particularly warm / social to the younger folks. There are lots of factors, including the fact that the younger people tend to have kids in schools / activities that are not very interesting to the older folks, the "driving up prices" factor, the cultural differences (many older Jewish residents have a more old world mindset about much of from everyday life to religious preferences), to the natural 'prickliness' that older folks in general are known for.

The best advice I have heard to overcome this is to find people like yourselves in HP -- if you have school age children that is often an excellent way to get to know other parents. If not there are plenty of opportunities to utilize the various recreational / cultural amenities of the area.

BTW -- When I was landlord (not in HP, but a town with some similar characteristics) the home owners that lived near my rental were ALWAYS suspicious of renters -- you have to realize that your rent may be ORDERS OF MAGNITUDE greater than they paid to BUY their house decades ago and that is something that gnaws at people. Further, as you indicate, when you do buy it means you will only be in the rental for a short time and may move to a very different part of town so they have no incentive to be especially neighborly...


Good Luck!

I've see this too. Some people feel its a waste of their time to be friends with someone who will move away.

[TennisDD]

The north shore is just like any other wealthy suburb of any city in the USA. Especially when old money is passed down from generations, that snobbinest is really in your face for these people tend to have the entitlement philosphy. "New money" areas like Naperville,etc. are a bit friendlier for there are more self made new money(those who had to work for what they got). But again, you will find plenty of snobs there as well.
Believe it or not, there are snobs here in Geneva. There are snobs everywhere, but also good people everywhere as well.

[Milwaukee City]

http://www.city-data.com/forum/chica...est-snobs.html

[Avengerfire]

Maybe that thread should be opened back up and this thread inserted into it.

[US-Traveller]

I think I am going to go crazy if there is another thread asking if the North Shore is snobby or snooty or criticizing it for being snobby or snooty. You can find these people anywhere. You can find them in Rogers Park or Austin too.

[Sunsmile]

I haven't even tried to socialize with my neighbours (other then say "hello"). People that seem snobby to me don't know that we are renters (they are not my neighboors). Also, it's not the older people.

We are "new money" and come from very poor background. So I think that's probably it.

The group of people that I have trouble connecting with is the local moms of young kids. I just don't seem to "click" with any of the Highland Park moms. The ones I've encountered that have lived here all their life just seem to have that snobby attitude...

Strangely enough, when I take my kids to the playgrounds in Northbrook and Deerfield (neighboring suburbs), I don't get that bad feeling - people there seem much more down to earth.