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I am so sorry for your situation. My advice to turn all this over to the Lord and to put Him first from now on. Tell her to do what she needs to do, but that you will not take this lightly because marriage is a HOLY institution. Focus on your health and being the best husband you can be under the circumstances. I will be sure to keep you in my prayers.
Married 5 years. For the last three years I have struggled to keep a steady job. I continue to earn good money but unfortunately my job is seasonal. Last November my wife and I where talking about how unhappy we were. Our needs are not being met. I wanted to get counseling. She wanted a divorce. She felt I was not holding up my end of the marriage financially and felt stressed and overwhelmed. We started going to counseling. At first we attended sessions with our church and then with a therapist. We had small breaks of success throughout the year. I thought we where making progress. I was wrong. In April, I had a serious injury that enabled me to walk for two months. My doctor says this injury might take 6 months to a year to return to full strength. Two weeks after the injury my wife came to me again and said she wanted a divorce. I’ve been very prayerful and rely on faith to get me through this. My wife says she has been prayerful as well and says that her heart is leading her to this decision. I asked her to lead her heart. Don’t let her heart lead you. She says the reason she wants a divorce is that we have drifted further apart. She says she loves me as a friend but not as a husband. She has lost love in me. It has been two and a half months and she still wants a divorce. I let her know that marriage isn’t always perfect. You go through your storms. I tell her our breakthrough is coming. She says she just doesn’t love me as a husband. There are days I don’t want to be around my wife. Some days it can be difficult being around her pushing me to do things. But that doesn’t stop me from loving her and honoring her. We said we would love unconditionally through the hard storms and the beautiful days. I know my wife is going through something but she won’t open up. It troubles me that my wife doesn’t have the courage to weather this storm.
What do you do when your wife stops loving you? Should separate with the hope that we can restore our marriage?
I know my breakthrough is coming.
This hurts.
same thing happened to me...Almost exactly...She was messing aound with one of her first boyfriends...Everytime he rolled through town with NASCAR on the way to a Race with Yates car...From Concord, NC...I was working a $8.50 / hour Job at the time and three months later I got a job with the DoD as a Radar Tech making $25/ hour and two months after that she didn't want the divorce...I told her it is too late, I was almost done with Computer Science Educatio then, If she did not want me when things were bad, then I didn't want her when things were good...She claimed to be "Christian" but disliked discussing the Bible...I didn't examine the fruit close enough before we married...Now, I am married to a wonderful woman...
Married 5 years. For the last three years I have struggled to keep a steady job. I continue to earn good money but unfortunately my job is seasonal. Last November my wife and I where talking about how unhappy we were. Our needs are not being met. I wanted to get counseling. She wanted a divorce. She felt I was not holding up my end of the marriage financially and felt stressed and overwhelmed. We started going to counseling. At first we attended sessions with our church and then with a therapist. We had small breaks of success throughout the year. I thought we where making progress. I was wrong. In April, I had a serious injury that enabled me to walk for two months. My doctor says this injury might take 6 months to a year to return to full strength. Two weeks after the injury my wife came to me again and said she wanted a divorce. I’ve been very prayerful and rely on faith to get me through this. My wife says she has been prayerful as well and says that her heart is leading her to this decision. I asked her to lead her heart. Don’t let her heart lead you. She says the reason she wants a divorce is that we have drifted further apart. She says she loves me as a friend but not as a husband. She has lost love in me. It has been two and a half months and she still wants a divorce. I let her know that marriage isn’t always perfect. You go through your storms. I tell her our breakthrough is coming. She says she just doesn’t love me as a husband. There are days I don’t want to be around my wife. Some days it can be difficult being around her pushing me to do things. But that doesn’t stop me from loving her and honoring her. We said we would love unconditionally through the hard storms and the beautiful days. I know my wife is going through something but she won’t open up. It troubles me that my wife doesn’t have the courage to weather this storm.
What do you do when your wife stops loving you? Should separate with the hope that we can restore our marriage?
I know my breakthrough is coming.
This hurts.
You already have the answer......just keep loving her as Christ Jesus loves you! Hold on okay, your breakthrough is coming!! Believe that! Yes, even in the midst of the storm.
Well in the long run if she really wants a divorce she can get one whether you like it or not,it takes two people to get married.....and two to STAY married.
When a woman somewhat suddenly wants a divorce and starts that 'love you as a friend' bs there is usually another guy in the picture,or at least on her mind.
I'm currently going through kind of the same thing.Eventually if she isn't willing to work it out you've got to let it go....
In April, I had a serious injury that enabled me to walk for two months.
What do you mean, the injury "enabled" you to walk for two months. Sorry to be such a stickler for detail but it could be read a few ways. I think you're saying it made you "unable" to walk for two months.
I recently watched a movie about this subject. Its called fireproof. In this movie a husband is given a (love dare) by his father. It is a book that gives u one thing to do every day for 40 days. It also includes scripture for each day.That love are book is available at most bookstores and online. Its kind of corny, but if you want to save your marriage why not try it.
Married 5 years. For the last three years I have struggled to keep a steady job. I continue to earn good money but unfortunately my job is seasonal. Last November my wife and I where talking about how unhappy we were. Our needs are not being met. I wanted to get counseling. She wanted a divorce. She felt I was not holding up my end of the marriage financially and felt stressed and overwhelmed. We started going to counseling. At first we attended sessions with our church and then with a therapist. We had small breaks of success throughout the year. I thought we where making progress. I was wrong. In April, I had a serious injury that enabled me to walk for two months. My doctor says this injury might take 6 months to a year to return to full strength. Two weeks after the injury my wife came to me again and said she wanted a divorce. I’ve been very prayerful and rely on faith to get me through this. My wife says she has been prayerful as well and says that her heart is leading her to this decision. I asked her to lead her heart. Don’t let her heart lead you. She says the reason she wants a divorce is that we have drifted further apart. She says she loves me as a friend but not as a husband. She has lost love in me. It has been two and a half months and she still wants a divorce. I let her know that marriage isn’t always perfect. You go through your storms. I tell her our breakthrough is coming. She says she just doesn’t love me as a husband. There are days I don’t want to be around my wife. Some days it can be difficult being around her pushing me to do things. But that doesn’t stop me from loving her and honoring her. We said we would love unconditionally through the hard storms and the beautiful days. I know my wife is going through something but she won’t open up. It troubles me that my wife doesn’t have the courage to weather this storm.
What do you do when your wife stops loving you? Should separate with the hope that we can restore our marriage?
I know my breakthrough is coming.
This hurts.
Marriage is hard at times for everyone and there is no easy way to success. It is written,
1COR 7:28 "But and if you marry, such shall have trouble in the flesh," because not everything is in our control.
Often times it is learning only tolerate one another until Love sets in through much prayer and Wisdom to overcome the hard times and look beyond one another's faults.The promise to those who seek and hang in there with Christ and the Truth are Golden even as Christ has said,
REV 2:7 He that has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says unto the churches; To him that overcomes will I give to eat of the Tree of Life, which is in the midst of the paradise of God."
REV 3:18 "I counsel you to buy of Me gold tried in the fire, that you may be rich; and white raiment, that you may be clothed, and that the shame of your nakedness does not appear; and anoint your eyes with eye salve, that you may see."
Show her this letter. This may offend her but Jesus offended many when He told them the Truth in Love in order to help them see the light. Medicine does not always taste good!
Sometimes our only spiritual resource is to tolerate until things get better but only through prayer. 1COR 7:29 "But this I say, brethren, the time is short: it remains, that they that have wives [or husbands] be as though they had none," because only in Christ is there perfect understanding of our needs and especially that of Love. Marriage is not always complete because of our many differences, but the two should not forsake one another if both are believers.
Be careful not to unduly blame yourself. It is a trap. We have all made mistakes at times and have all been "cast down [by ourselfs or others] but not forsaken." Even St. Paul had his short comings.
PHIL 3:13 "Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind [mistakes and failings], and reaching forth unto those things which are before."
Do what you can but if she insists then what can you do? Let her make the final decision after all is said and done on your part. 1COR 7:16 For what do you know, O wife, whether you shall save your husband? or how do you know, O man, whether you shall save your wife?
My blessings in Christ go out to you in your trial!
Keep fighting for it. You obviously love her, and somewhere deep in side of her there is a remembrance of that love. Try to tap into that again. My prayers are with you brother. Turn it over to Christ, and put your shoes and shirt on everyday, do the work, let him move the heart.
Married 5 years. For the last three years I have struggled to keep a steady job. I continue to earn good money but unfortunately my job is seasonal. Last November my wife and I where talking about how unhappy we were. Our needs are not being met. I wanted to get counseling. She wanted a divorce. She felt I was not holding up my end of the marriage financially and felt stressed and overwhelmed. We started going to counseling. At first we attended sessions with our church and then with a therapist. We had small breaks of success throughout the year. I thought we where making progress. I was wrong. In April, I had a serious injury that enabled me to walk for two months. My doctor says this injury might take 6 months to a year to return to full strength. Two weeks after the injury my wife came to me again and said she wanted a divorce. I’ve been very prayerful and rely on faith to get me through this. My wife says she has been prayerful as well and says that her heart is leading her to this decision. I asked her to lead her heart. Don’t let her heart lead you. She says the reason she wants a divorce is that we have drifted further apart. She says she loves me as a friend but not as a husband. She has lost love in me. It has been two and a half months and she still wants a divorce. I let her know that marriage isn’t always perfect. You go through your storms. I tell her our breakthrough is coming. She says she just doesn’t love me as a husband. There are days I don’t want to be around my wife. Some days it can be difficult being around her pushing me to do things. But that doesn’t stop me from loving her and honoring her. We said we would love unconditionally through the hard storms and the beautiful days. I know my wife is going through something but she won’t open up. It troubles me that my wife doesn’t have the courage to weather this storm.
What do you do when your wife stops loving you? Should separate with the hope that we can restore our marriage?
I know my breakthrough is coming.
This hurts.
Dump her ass, and find someone younger and better looking.
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