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I was called by a woman tonight who wanted counsel about this:
Her husband has a full-time job in which he's supposed to be making his own schedule and working. Instead, he sleeps in until ten a.m. and then sits in front of the TV all day. He's addicted to prescription drugs (she found out b/c the pharmacy called) and constantly says he wants a divorce. He may truly want it, but he would probably not file for it. He often tells her to take the kids and leave for good and constantly yells and argues in front of their kids. Lately he's been accusing her of cheating, although she stays home with their kids and doesn't have a car. She hasn't said much of anything in return (remember 1 Peter 3) until tonight, and I guess she just blew up on him. He told her that she makes him depressed and forces him on medication which makes him not want to work. Again he told her he wants a divorce.
She calls me for advice. I know that divorce is not an option, and that he will never really file for divorce. What would your Biblical counsel be for this situation?
I was called by a woman tonight who wanted counsel about this:
Her husband has a full-time job in which he's supposed to be making his own schedule and working. Instead, he sleeps in until ten a.m. and then sits in front of the TV all day. He's addicted to prescription drugs (she found out b/c the pharmacy called) and constantly says he wants a divorce. He may truly want it, but he would probably not file for it. He often tells her to take the kids and leave for good and constantly yells and argues in front of their kids. Lately he's been accusing her of cheating, although she stays home with their kids and doesn't have a car. She hasn't said much of anything in return (remember 1 Peter 3) until tonight, and I guess she just blew up on him. He told her that she makes him depressed and forces him on medication which makes him not want to work. Again he told her he wants a divorce.
She calls me for advice. I know that divorce is not an option, and that he will never really file for divorce. What would your Biblical counsel be for this situation?
Maybe this insnt Biblical in every sense..but if I were her..I think Id take the kids and tell him we all needed a "breather" time to get priorities inline..maybe she and the kids could go to her parents for a while...usually of course when one is taking anykind of heavy duty drugs ..they cant think straight anyway..she needs to try and see if he will get help..Notice I didnt say to "leave" him..but it seems they both need time to think about things..I also notice you didnt say whether he was Christian or not?
Very tough in deed. I believe she should surround herself with God's Word.
The wife should consult God directly, through prayer. Not everyone will be tested the same. Becareful, what advice you give her. The husband has fallen prey to addiction, a very dangerous sin. She can yell, work harder, do everything right, but unless the husband wants to change, it may be an endless pursuit for him.
She married him and committed herself to him, did she not? This is exactly why we are to court. We all jump into relationships far too quickly. God warns us about being unequally yoked.
She could take the "path" traveled by most and seek a divorce/seperation. She may decide to stand strong and face this battle along side her husband. If she can be an genuine inspiration to him through her everyday living, he might get a clue.
Brother will come against brother, child will come against parent....ring a bell? She may be a Christian, he may not. If so, then this is an up-hill battle. She needs to arm herself with scripture.
He told her today that he's not a Christian because he doesn't want to read the Bible, pray, or be forgiven. I was wondering what the grounds for separation are.
At first glance it seems that the husband is being passive aggressive. He blames his wife for his own faults, because it is the easiest thing to do.
All in all it is save to say that he's unhappy about something. He might be having a mid-life crisis?
Or maybe the stress of the job might be too much?
For me to give any sort of advice I'd have to hear both sides of the story.
The wife should consult God directly, through prayer. Not everyone will be tested the same. Becareful, what advice you give her. The husband has fallen prey to addiction, a very dangerous sin. She can yell, work harder, do everything right, but unless the husband wants to change, it may be an endless pursuit for him.
She married him and committed herself to him, did she not? This is exactly why we are to court. We all jump into relationships far too quickly. God warns us about being unequally yoked.
She could take the "path" traveled by most and seek a divorce/seperation. She may decide to stand strong and face this battle along side her husband. If she can be an genuine inspiration to him through her everyday living, he might get a clue.
Brother will come against brother, child will come against parent....ring a bell? She may be a Christian, he may not. If so, then this is an up-hill battle. She needs to arm herself with scripture.
Good advice. I almost know in my heart that I need to tell her to go home and continue to practice 1 Peter 3, but I somehow feel bad for saying it.
Good advice. I almost know in my heart that I need to tell her to go home and continue to practice 1 Peter 3, but I somehow feel bad for saying it.
I'm with Arguy. Not saying she should flat out leave him, but definitely get her kids out of that situation until she sees what is ultimately going to happen. If she leaves for a bit and tells him to straighten out (maybe rehab or Narc-anon) and he does then she can go back. But I don't think Peter ever meant for anyone to take constant abuse or to expose their children to it. I am assuming until now it's been good which is why I'm thinking they should try to work it out, but if it's always been bad then I would say the marriage wasn't valid to begin with and she should leave. Maybe she could get their pastor to intervene before leaving, but getting the kids out would be my first priority.
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Very tough in deed. I believe she should surround herself with God's Word.
He might be having a mid-life crisis?
