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Old 10-25-2007, 05:56 PM
 
Location: All around the world.....
2,886 posts, read 7,495,882 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jco View Post
I was called by a woman tonight who wanted counsel about this:

Her husband has a full-time job in which he's supposed to be making his own schedule and working. Instead, he sleeps in until ten a.m. and then sits in front of the TV all day. He's addicted to prescription drugs (she found out b/c the pharmacy called) and constantly says he wants a divorce. He may truly want it, but he would probably not file for it. He often tells her to take the kids and leave for good and constantly yells and argues in front of their kids. Lately he's been accusing her of cheating, although she stays home with their kids and doesn't have a car. She hasn't said much of anything in return (remember 1 Peter 3) until tonight, and I guess she just blew up on him. He told her that she makes him depressed and forces him on medication which makes him not want to work. Again he told her he wants a divorce.

She calls me for advice. I know that divorce is not an option, and that he will never really file for divorce. What would your Biblical counsel be for this situation?
Tell her check out this website: about the Christian and marriage I stumbled across this evening
God's Word For You - Creation factor - equality, unity, differentiation (broken link)
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Old 10-25-2007, 05:58 PM
 
Location: All around the world.....
2,886 posts, read 7,495,882 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by captnemo62 View Post
JCO,
1st off I'm glad she has your shoulder to lean on. She knew you would not take this lightly.
My advise to you is have her do the following.
Get the kids out of the house.
Have her join Al-Anon and Narc-Anon.
And talk...really talk to her pastor. Pastor are trained and if the Pastor doesn't think he/she can help, He/she can lead her in the right direction.
This is good Captnemo;
This sounds like something my pastor would say;
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Old 10-25-2007, 07:51 PM
jco jco started this thread
 
Location: Austin
2,120 posts, read 5,954,279 times
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Thank you all for your words of wisdom!

Last night my husband ended up calling her husband and asked to meet. He responded at midnight and said that he doesn't pry into our marriage, and he doesn't want us to get into his. It seems that in order to avoid Biblical admonishment, he's agreed to go through counseling with an older and wiser couple. In fact, they've set an appointment. He still threated divorce again this morning, but she again told him she's staying with him.

As far as the advice I gave her, it was very difficult to me. 1 Peter chapter 3 does begin with the word "likewise", Alpha. The likewise refers to the way that Jesus suffered without deserving it and how a slave unfairly treated by his master should still be respectful. My husband read to me the verse last night that says we must be ready with a defense when it's asked of us. He commented that we have to be living our lives so different from what the culture allows us to that people actually ask. I realized that in this situation, she is really facing the impossible. It's impossible for her to be a perfect wife to a scumbag like her husband; however, we know that nothing is impossible with God and that we aren't tempted beyond what we are capable and in any way that is not common to humankind. She needs to live by the Spirit and allow the Spirit to lovingly respond to her husband. His sin isn't reason for her to sin.

There seems to be some grounds for separation here, though, especially since they have children. I did recommend that she consider taking the kids and separating until he seeks drug counseling. I honestly think that because they're prescription drugs, she won't do it.
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Old 10-25-2007, 09:07 PM
 
120 posts, read 165,250 times
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Whatever God brings together, let no "man" take apart.

Sound familiar?
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Old 10-25-2007, 09:12 PM
 
Location: The Netherlands
8,567 posts, read 14,784,477 times
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Originally Posted by Tryingtofigureitout
Quote:
Whatever God brings together, let no "man" take apart.

Sound familiar?
Are you really suggesting that women should always bear their abusive husbands behaviour because this is God's intention all along?
I know that many religious people believe that suffering strengthens the soul, but this is ridiculous.
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Old 10-25-2007, 09:19 PM
 
Location: Just a few miles outside of St. Louis
1,921 posts, read 5,162,285 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tricky D View Post
Originally Posted by Tryingtofigureitout Are you really suggesting that women should always bear their abusive husbands behaviour because this is God's intention all along?
I know that many religious people believe that suffering strengthens the soul, but this is ridiculous.
Actually, I thought Trying was saying something entirely different about certain aspects of some Christians' beliefs, concerning the woman's supposed role in a marriage. But, maybe I'm the one who is confused.
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Old 10-25-2007, 09:32 PM
 
Location: The Netherlands
8,567 posts, read 14,784,477 times
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Originally Posted by CelticLady1
Quote:
Actually, I thought Trying was saying something entirely different about certain aspects of some Christians' beliefs, concerning the woman's supposed role in a marriage. But, maybe I'm the one who is confused.
When the bible says man it often means humanity, right?
So it would mean that no human could ever diforce and probably should not even seperate.
Or I maybe I've interpreted Tryingtofigureitout's words wrong?
Although she was quoting the bible, right?
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Old 10-26-2007, 05:55 AM
 
Location: Orlando
8,181 posts, read 16,526,299 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yhwhshalomjr View Post
This is good Captnemo;
This sounds like something my pastor would say;
That's cuz I'm a preacher's kid......please don't tell him I was actually paying attention while I was growing up. It would ruin my image.
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Old 10-26-2007, 09:29 AM
 
Location: All around the world.....
2,886 posts, read 7,495,882 times
Reputation: 1048
Quote:
Originally Posted by captnemo62 View Post
That's cuz I'm a preacher's kid......please don't tell him I was actually paying attention while I was growing up. It would ruin my image.
:
You are?????? I KNEW IT
God Bless You
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