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Old 10-27-2007, 12:51 PM
 
435 posts, read 1,048,078 times
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I am realy struggling to serve God when the going gets tough. In mind it feels like I am serving Him because I need something, that my motives are selfish. The guilt kills me, so I end up pulling away from Him and His help, all because I want to serve him with a pure heart, not because i want something from Him. Now my question to you guys is - is this normal? Do any of you ever have these feelings? Is this pride? I hope not, I realy just want to seek His face, rather than His gifts. I feel caught between accepting the Lord as my Supplier and resisting my fallen nature that seeks to please its self. words of wisdom from anyone?
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Old 10-27-2007, 01:07 PM
 
Location: The world, where will fate take me this time?
3,162 posts, read 10,294,821 times
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Well my friend IMHO that's life eternal struggle, our ego and soul, both with their armies of good and bad tendencies are waging an internal war as we speak, try to be strong and think that you aren't who's doing the good things, it is God who is doing them using yourself as his tool, keep him present in your heart and soul whenever you are doing something and don't pay attention to those ego inspired thoughts, keep praying, night and day, concentrating on God's divine love and ask for him to strengthen your soul and her warriors to be able to defeat the false king ego from the realm of your bodily kingdom

Love and Light
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Old 10-27-2007, 02:00 PM
 
Location: NC
11,918 posts, read 13,812,679 times
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Quote:
I am realy struggling to serve God when the going gets tough. In mind it feels like I am serving Him because I need something, that my motives are selfish. The guilt kills me, so I end up pulling away from Him and His help, all because I want to serve him with a pure heart, not because i want something from Him. Now my question to you guys is - is this normal? Do any of you ever have these feelings? Is this pride? I hope not, I realy just want to seek His face, rather than His gifts. I feel caught between accepting the Lord as my Supplier and resisting my fallen nature that seeks to please its self. words of wisdom from anyone?
Hi, it sounds like you are in a good place because you realize that you do want to serve God with the right motives. Some of us don't even realize this. When I have these struggles I try to remember to ask God to help me have the right heart, the right motives, and I ask Him to help me to remember that it is for His will and not my will. God knows all about your heart and He is the One who is working within you to both will and work for His good pleasure. God bless you.
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Old 10-27-2007, 04:10 PM
 
Location: Pikeville, Ky.
13,459 posts, read 21,197,034 times
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The op's question can be answered with a question, IMO..If your child was struggling with decisions, whether personal or financially or was in pain, or was just worried over little things, who do you want him to come to for comfort or advice or just to talk to?
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Old 10-27-2007, 04:48 PM
 
7,099 posts, read 23,885,607 times
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If everyone waited until they "had a pure heart," we would be in bad shape. There is no reason that you should feel that you should either. If you feel guilt, it's more because you have waited on that "pure heart" instead of being what you can as best you can.

We are all weak, and we all fall short. We can't sit around and wait until we feel we are worthy.
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Old 10-27-2007, 06:39 PM
 
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I don't think it is uncommon to find it challenging to serve God in times of need, tests or trials. We have to fight the good fight of faith as Christians. I know I have to fight it every day. I find when my need is the greatest that is when I realize I need God the most. I get anointed with motivation to pray during times of trouble. The Bible says we are to pray without ceasing...nothing like a crisis to heat up my prayer life to that level. Why? Because I do want something? No, it is because I need something. I don't think that is a bad thing. The Bible tells us to call on the name of the Lord, to ask, seek, and Knock. God is not disappointed with us because we bring our needs to HIM. HE wants us to. We are in covenant relationship with HIM. I love God with a sincere heart. He is my Father. Where else can I turn in times of trouble? If I go to HIM in prayer and ask for anything, HE still knows what I have need of. HE knows what I am going through and HE knows what is in my heart. I can hide nothing from HIM and neither can u. God knows your motivation for serving HIM. HE sees all that is in your heart. There is nothing like my own pain and suffering to drive me to my knees. I think this is true of most Christians. I don't feel guilty boldly approaching the throne of grace where by I can obtain mercy. I seek HIS face and HIS favor out of a heart or love, but I actually need HIM more than I love HIM. I think this is the state of all humanity. And this is why HE sent HIS SON...we all have need of a Saviour. I just want to encourage u not to let feelings of guilt keep u from taking your needs to God in prayer.
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Old 10-27-2007, 11:37 PM
 
435 posts, read 1,048,078 times
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Thanks guys for all your wise words, I value them more than you know. Just now I was sitting and thinking about them, and searching my heart. And I think the Lord is showing me something about me that never realized - I fear disappointment and failure alot, I struggle dealing with it. When I ask for something, and I dont get it, I get very depressed and loose my focus. Then after the depression I feel guilt for being selfish. Now I think about it I realize the same thing happened with my parents, I never asked for anything. Okay I am going to see a shrink, clearly I am more screwed up than I thought I was. Thanks again guys.
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Old 10-28-2007, 07:13 AM
 
7,099 posts, read 23,885,607 times
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Timothy, that's a good first step. Don't fret about whether or not you are being selfish. Very few people, if they are honest, are totally unselfish.

Disappointment in not getting what we want is common too. Some folks just have more patience than others in waiting for good things to happen.
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Old 10-28-2007, 09:40 AM
 
1,703 posts, read 4,623,059 times
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Timothy you are very blessed that you want to serve God for the right reasons but like Padgett said if we all waited till we were "pure in heart" we'd be in bad shape.
We all need God desperately, and there is nothing wrong with that. We are much less than Him and we cannot get through life without Him. There is nothing wrong with needing God's help and wanting to serve Him for our own comfort. The important thing is what's in our hearts; that we realize that we need to be striving to serve Him selflessly. God Bless.
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Old 10-28-2007, 09:44 AM
 
Location: Maryland
3,540 posts, read 5,958,358 times
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If someone is starving, and you feed him, do you think he cares what your motivation is?
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