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A local group home for mentally challenged adults inquired about bringing a group of residents to the 10 AM Sunday service. The deacons and I agreed. The group home employee started bringing between 4-6 residents weekly. The first three weeks the group home employee came in to supervise. Then he started waiting in their van.
I have the residents sit together in the front left side pew. Some of the residents are extremely noisy to the point of disruption and distraction. Several church members have complained that it is getting out of hand. I called another church they used to attend. The pastor informed me he'd eventually asked them to leave, for the very same reasons.
We had another meeting to discuss the issue of the noise complaints. Here were some ideas and how they went over.
Ideas tried;
Asked the van driver to come in and supervise. He said, "Church really isn't my thing."
Have them come to the less crowded 8 AM service. This was too early for them to get going.
Ideas only at this point;
Split them up so each sits near people who could remind them when they are noisy.
Have them sit in an unused Sunday School room with a live feed and church member monitor.
Have them sit together in the auditorium with a rotating church member monitor.
I believe this group is a true blessing. The last thing I want is to feel the necessity to have them leave like the other church did. Maybe you have been in a similar situation or have some insight into what might be helpful.
We had a similiar problem. We have them meet in a separate room, and their " church service" is conducted by volunteers. It's been a real blessing for all participants.
On one hand, I really believe that the church family should reflect real life. If a baby is crying...that's just how life is. If a person is a little noisy...so be it. I think people benefit from interacting and worshiping with all sorts of folks. But there is a point at which it gets to be too much.
I wonder...would the group home employee take a group ANYWHERE else and just sit in the van? To the mall? The store? The movie theater?
Why church?
Having said that, the church family ought to be like a family to them...maybe they aren't now...but eventually. If they were visiting family, the family would supervise them, and the van driver might not be present. I'd suggest you need to make every attempt to find a way to keep them coming. If that means a church volunteer or three sits with them....great. If that means placing them in a "cry room" of sorts....ok.
I give you credit for wanting to be there for them.
I have the residents sit together in the front left side pew.
Perhaps some place less conspicuous? Towards the back with easy access to a side room if necessary? And with a volunteer monitor? My (very grand, Episcopal) church in New York City has homeless who sit in the back during services, especially in the winter. Everyone knows that they’re there for the warmth and not the service, but no one would dream of asking them to leave. We belive that everyone is welcome.
Thanks for the excellent replies. It looks like our ideas are on the right track. I printed them and will bring them up at our next monthly meeting. It might take a while to find the best arrangement, but I think we can. Glad we aren't missing some glaringly obvious solution.
It would be nice to have a cry room. It would be nice to have a lot of things, that simply aren't in the budget.
I would recommend separation as a group through out the congregation. I believe it's better for those who are visiting to integrate within the congregation. It will certainly help with their socialization skills. Maybe place them with volunteers? I'd ask the Deacons first since they agreed. Lead by example. In addition let them walk/ hold the offering plates if they can, with the Deacons.... this will give them ownership and give them a chance to meet everyone. Maybe have one of them join the choir , or hand out bulletins. Give them something to do and they will quiet down. Reward the quiet ones.
They might behave better and quiet down if they are separated. Kinda like children
I would recommend separation as a group through out the congregation. I believe it's better for those who are visiting to integrate within the congregation. It will certainly help with their socialization skills. Maybe place them with volunteers? I'd ask the Deacons first since they agreed. Lead by example. In addition let them walk/ hold the offering plates if they can, with the Deacons.... this will give them ownership and give them a chance to meet everyone. Maybe have one of them join the choir , or hand out bulletins. Give them something to do and they will quiet down. Reward the quiet ones.
They might behave better and quiet down if they are separated. Kinda like children
...just sayin'
Excellent ideas, most of which I'm leaning towards.
Are these folks mentally challenged? Do they even understand they are in church? I think the administrators are simply using Pastor to meet their quota of taking the patients out into the world. If I was Pastor, I would ask them to leave.
A noisy unpolite crowd that does not understand the message of the Lord should not be allowed to make life miserable for other parishioners.
Several church members have complained that it is getting out of hand. I called another church they used to attend. The pastor informed me he'd eventually asked them to leave, for the very same reasons.
Have any of the church members volunteered to watch over this group during your services? If not, you might wonder why. Some are willing to complain.
Hopefully you have people in your church who are willing to...... help. Here's your chance to find out what your congregation is made of. You have a HUGE opportunity here. Are the people in your congregation used to being around special needs adults? If not, and were I you, I'd look into finding someone knowledgeable about special needs adults to come in and talk to your congregation about them. That person should also be able to give you advice on the situation as a whole. It's a chance for everyone to learn.
Last edited by DewDropInn; 01-18-2014 at 09:48 AM..
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