Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Yours is a good question and the reality is there is not much you can truthfully 'say' to persuade them that their loved one is now in heaven and enjoying God's presence. (And is that really what you want to do?) If they are Christians themselves, they already know and are probably grieving over the fate of their loved one. The best you can do is sincerely tell them that you are sorry for their loss --and then be available to help them talk about their loss and feelings.
Having conducted a few funerals for non-Christians, I've sometimes truthfully said, "If they could come back and talk with you today, they would tell you to get right with the Lord by trusting your life and heart to Jesus Christ today;" ... leading into a Gospel presentation.
Funerals are a time when people confront their own mortality and start to think seriously about their own eternal destination. I'm not suggesting an overbearing or insensitive approach, but, Believers will not be offended by the Gospel truth and it is no time to 'sugar-coat' that truth for non-believers.
I agree. While not wanting to be insensitive to those who are grieving, the truth must not be denied in an attempt to provide false hope and comfort. All you can do is as you said, tell them that you're sorry for their loss, and then be there for them.
Especially if they are Christian's themselves?
When a known Christian passes you can always remind the family that the departed is with Jesus in Heaven. No more pain, no more sorrow, no more disease, suffering or fear. Eternal happiness and unlimited joy in the company of the creator for all eternity.
That won't work with the family of an atheist/agnostic/unbeliever. The family already has a pretty good idea what the future of the atheist holds. This leaves me without my stand-by comfort offering. I find myself searching for ANY kind of consoling words to speak.
Any advice, any words I can use? How do you deal with it?
How do you deal with a family member who's an atheist who has passed? This would be unbearable to me!
How can this be hard? Go to them. Go to the wake. Go to the funeral. Tell them you are sorry they have to go through this lose. Tell them you are thinking of them. Take some food to their house. Whatever you do, don't mention religion or lack of religion. That will only be hurtful to the family members.
Perhaps you could read to the family Romans 6 v 7.
Romans 6 v 23 says the price tag or wages that sin pays is ' death '.
As with Adam there is No post-mortem penalty mentioned. Just that death stamps the price tag of sin as Paid in Full.
The exception is if one has committed the unforgivable sin mentioned at Matthew 12 v 32; Hebrews 6 vs 4-6
Just being an atheist, etc. does Not automatically place a person in that category because we can not read hearts.
So, in the meantime, that means there could be hope. Not a hope of being resurrected to heavenly life, but a hope of being resurrected back to healthy physical life on earth starting with Jesus' coming 1000-year kingdom reign over earth.
Romans 6 v 7 mentions that the one who has died [ in this case the atheist ] is freed or acquitted from sin.
That does Not make a person now innocent, but rather as a governor can pardon a person so the crime charges do Not stick, Jesus as Judge can pardon a person so the sin charges no longer stick. Those resurrected on earth will be judged on how they respond and what they do ' after ' they are resurrected on earth - Acts 24 v 15
By the end of Jesus millennium-long day of reigning over a paradisaic earth our last enemy ' death ' will be gone forever.
-1st Cor. 15 v 26; Rev 21 vs 4,5. So, those alive on earth at that time frame will have gained healthy everlasting life on earth as originally offered to Adam before his downfall.
What a cruel thing to do! This family is grieving over the lose of a family member who happened to believe none of their religion or their Bible. All your suggestion does is make their pain greater as they think of what their loved one did not believe.
Yours is a good question and the reality is there is not much you can truthfully 'say' to persuade them that their loved one is now in heaven and enjoying God's presence. (And is that really what you want to do?) If they are Christians themselves, they already know and are probably grieving over the fate of their loved one. The best you can do is sincerely tell them that you are sorry for their loss --and then be available to help them talk about their loss and feelings.
Having conducted a few funerals for non-Christians, I've sometimes truthfully said, "If they could come back and talk with you today, they would tell you to get right with the Lord by trusting your life and heart to Jesus Christ today;" ... leading into a Gospel presentation.
Funerals are a time when people confront their own mortality and start to think seriously about their own eternal destination. I'm not suggesting an overbearing or insensitive approach, but, Believers will not be offended by the Gospel truth and it is no time to 'sugar-coat' that truth for non-believers.
I agree with your first paragraph.
I think your second paragraph is ridiculous. You have no right to impose your mind reading skills into as grieving family's attempt to deal with their lose. You don't know what that atheist might do if he was brought back to life.
I think a funeral should be a time to reflect on the life of the guest of honor, not to be forced to listen to a hellfire and brimstone sermon.
Having attended many dozens of funerals and been honoured to serve as pallbearer at over 20, I'm your guy for this one.
Shake the hand/hug/kiss the grieving family/best friends (depending on the closeness of your relationships) and say to each: "I'm so sorry."
And if you truly care about them, call or drop an email or an invite for coffee in a couple/few weeks. Many fair-weather friends will have forgotten about their loss by then. Don't be afraid to ask how they're doing since the funeral. Give them an opening to talk about their lost loved one and their feelings.
Try to be supportive by listening without being judgmental.
Just be a friend.
^^^ This! See? It's simple. Here's how to be supportive for a family that has just lost a non-believer. Actually, this is a good way to treat anybody experiencing a lose.
I realize that you are just speaking your mind, but let's not turn this into a religious debate...
It isn't a religious debate. It is about how to be caring and helpful to a family with this particular lose. Some families may be very hurt be mentioning religion because they are already saddened by the knowledge that their departed loved one did not have religious beliefs.
What a cruel thing to do! This family is grieving over the lose of a family member who happened to believe none of their religion or their Bible. All your suggestion does is make their pain greater as they think of what their loved one did not believe.
My understanding is Not the family, but the dead family member who was an atheist.
How is it pain to show that there is real biblical hope for their dead loved one ?
What does Romans 6 v 7 mean to you ?
How is having a future earthly resurrection inflicting pain ? - Acts 24 v 15
My understanding is Not the family, but the dead family member who was an atheist.
How is it pain to show that there is real biblical hope for their dead loved one ?
What does Romans 6 v 7 mean to you ?
How is having a future earthly resurrection inflicting pain ? - Acts 24 v 15
First, you are talking about biblical hope to a family of Christians that are already aware of such things and who may be grieving over the fact that their dearly departed did not believe. That's fairly obvious to me. You just opened up wounds that they cried over in private.
Second, you are being cold and heartless to remind them of biblical hope of which they are already aware while they question the fate of their dead relative.
Thirdly, any mention of religion only serves to remind them that their dead relative had no religion, which makes them question the eternal fate of their family member.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
