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Old 10-14-2008, 06:48 PM
 
Location: 👶🏾CHI🛫CVG🛬AVL🛫CMH🛬CHI🛫?
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Hi everyone, I need some advice.
I moved to Cincinnati 3 years ago and immediatly started attending this one great Church called Allen Temple. When the Pastor left and they brought in another one, alot of people left because he was WAY too militant and didnt have the same values as our other Pastor. So I went visiting alot of churches and one church I went to, St. Joesph- I really liked and it seemed to be a good match for me but I wanted to check out one more church before commiting to this one. Well I went to this other church, St. Agnes, and they IMMEDIATLY took me in- I mean before I even got out of my car, someone in the parking lot came to my car to say hi before Church started lol. So after Church I was invited to an inquiry session where I can discuss service and learn more about the Church and they just took me in, inviting me back, inviting me to Bible study, took my number down and assigned a lady to be there for me if I had any problems or questions. It was nice, I felt like the Church chose me and this was God's way of showing me this is where I shoud be. Well as weeks went on, I just started losing interest. I dont feel the Spirit like in Allen Temple and St. Joe has the potential to be a close match to what I have been searching for. So my question is- how do I let the Pastor and the lovely ladies who have been emailing and calling me to check up on me (my job is 100% travel and sometimes I fly out of Sundays so Im not in Church or I dont attend Bible study on Tuesdays because Im out of town) how do I tell them I'm not coming back, im going to join St. Joe? Thanks!
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Old 10-14-2008, 06:56 PM
 
Location: Oxford, OH
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Wow that is hard. It sounds like they do a wonderful job of making a new person feel welcome. That is not always the case. But you have to follow your heart and where you feel God is leading you. I think I would praise them for their love they have shown but just be honest and say you feel God is leading your to another church. Very hard I'm sure...
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Old 10-14-2008, 07:45 PM
 
Location: Murfreesboro, TN
3,528 posts, read 7,165,575 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by driftwoodpoint View Post
Wow that is hard. It sounds like they do a wonderful job of making a new person feel welcome. That is not always the case. But you have to follow your heart and where you feel God is leading you. I think I would praise them for their love they have shown but just be honest and say you feel God is leading your to another church. Very hard I'm sure...
I agree completely with this post.
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Old 10-18-2008, 08:49 PM
 
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Why do you need to explain anything to anyone? Go back to St. Joseph's Church for a few weeks and then you can email your friends at St. Agnes and tell them you feel more at home at St. Josephs. If they are both good Catholic Churches as the names suggest, your friends should be happy that you found a home among fellow Catholics.
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Old 10-19-2008, 01:05 PM
 
Location: NW Arkansas
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Wherever you chose to go, I pray that you are comparing their doctrine with the inspired word. Friendship will not save anyone...only the truth can do that.
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Old 10-19-2008, 05:04 PM
 
Location: In Sticky San Antonio TX
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I also agree with visiting St. Joe's for a period of time before dropping St. Agnes. Being led of the spirit is beyond the interpersonal connection. If you miss St. Ag's, you can easily and comfortably return, esp. since you are often out of the area on Sundays and during mid-week sessions.

Having said that, and despite the disagreements between you and the minister at Allen Temple, what are your other reasons for leaving? Are they similarly quantifiable?

When you finally have to excise yourself (and you didn't mention how you did it at Allen Temple - or did you presume the existing exodus explained your move) be a mature adult and say why. The truth rarely hurts anyone save when it is said with malice.
Best of luck.
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Old 10-19-2008, 08:14 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kin Atoms View Post
Having said that, and despite the disagreements between you and the minister at Allen Temple, what are your other reasons for leaving? Are they similarly quantifiable?
I don't know why but I wonder, too, if maybe you aren't being led back to Allen Temple -- "the great church you attended"...

Maybe you need to go back there for a season and see what's going on. Maybe the new pastor needed to be given time to get his sea legs. I don't know what the situation was there except that he came in new and was different and people got offended and left...
Based on your short post, it sounds to me like maybe you're missing "your church".

As far as the other churches go... If you were just attending church there for a short time and not involved in "ministry" I don't know why you feel that you owe anyone an explanation.

but that's just my opinion

Last edited by World Citizen; 10-19-2008 at 09:21 PM..
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Old 10-20-2008, 07:59 AM
 
Location: 👶🏾CHI🛫CVG🛬AVL🛫CMH🛬CHI🛫?
926 posts, read 2,400,664 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kin Atoms View Post
I also agree with visiting St. Joe's for a period of time before dropping St. Agnes. Being led of the spirit is beyond the interpersonal connection. If you miss St. Ag's, you can easily and comfortably return, esp. since you are often out of the area on Sundays and during mid-week sessions.

Having said that, and despite the disagreements between you and the minister at Allen Temple, what are your other reasons for leaving? Are they similarly quantifiable?

When you finally have to excise yourself (and you didn't mention how you did it at Allen Temple - or did you presume the existing exodus explained your move) be a mature adult and say why. The truth rarely hurts anyone save when it is said with malice.
Best of luck.
There were no other reasons for me leaving except I didnt feel the Spirit anymore in the Church. My old Pastor was more progressive, yes the AME church belives this but he didnt agree with everything of that (thus why he left to go non denominational) but he brought in a whole slew of people and unforotunatly when he left, all the new AND OLD left with him. So my only reason for leaving was I didnt agree with the Pastors views and I didnt feel the Spirit in the church anymore. My old Pastors sermons is what made me change my ways and truly live life like a Christian. It mae me go home and think and journal and reflect. With this Pastor, my pen stays in my hand but no words on my paper.

And I only told people I was close to at Allen that I was leaving but not the Pastor because he didnt know me or care to get to know me.
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Old 10-20-2008, 08:05 AM
 
Location: 👶🏾CHI🛫CVG🛬AVL🛫CMH🛬CHI🛫?
926 posts, read 2,400,664 times
Reputation: 399
Quote:
Originally Posted by World Citizen View Post
I don't know why but I wonder, too, if maybe you aren't being led back to Allen Temple -- "the great church you attended"...

Maybe you need to go back there for a season and see what's going on. Maybe the new pastor needed to be given time to get his sea legs. I don't know what the situation was there except that he came in new and was different and people got offended and left...
Based on your short post, it sounds to me like maybe you're missing "your church".

As far as the other churches go... If you were just attending church there for a short time and not involved in "ministry" I don't know why you feel that you owe anyone an explanation.

but that's just my opinion
Its funny you should say this because my play sister told me that Allen Temple will always be my home and I will end up back there someday. I am hoping she is right too. I do like the advice you gave about him needing to get his "sea legs", because I was honestly going to wait until he was gone to try it again lol. I miss Allen so much, I miss the feeling I got when worshipping God that hasnt been duplicated yet. I miss all the ministries I was involved in (which the new Pastor cut in half since he has come ggggrrrr....) But I need to find something until I can "go home". And I feel I do owe them an explination because they always send me enbvelopes with magazine and newspaper articles about God and the seasons in the church years etc...when they think of me so I feel I owe them an explination on why I may not be back. Thanks for the great advice though
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Old 10-20-2008, 08:06 AM
 
4,541 posts, read 12,763,505 times
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babigyrl5,

I know how you feel...

I had to move away from an area due to family reasons for a few years. During the time I was gone, a precious pastor who had been at "my church" left and was replaced by a new pastor.

When I went back, everything about the church I loved had changed. Many people had gone to other churches.
It only took a few services to know that I didn't want to be there anymore.

But, I don't think you owe anyone an explanation for leaving the churches you've been visiting. Who knows? You may want to visit again.
If you run into them in the store or something, just be loving and answer their questions honestly. I don't think it has to be "goodbye".

I think it's wonderful that they care enough to call!

God bless you!

Last edited by World Citizen; 10-20-2008 at 08:15 AM..
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