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Old 03-20-2009, 07:06 AM
 
512 posts, read 1,338,861 times
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Good day to all.

I've been really playing tug of war with God in regards to my personal life. I truly believe the Lord is directing me to get my house in order. I've been struggling with tithes and offering. I want to start tithing but in order to do so it really will throw me off financially. I really want to start believing and trusting the Lord to tithe regardless of my circumstances, but my wife is not on the same page. I want to be respectful of my wife, but I also want to do right. How do you go about trying to do God's will and also let the wife know that this is what we need to do? Has anybody been in this situation and overcame it? If so how?
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Old 03-20-2009, 07:57 AM
 
7,780 posts, read 12,722,977 times
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Honestly, I'd let God handle it.

Tell your wife you just want to try and be obedient to the Lord for 30 days and see what happens. If she agrees, give as you see fit and see where you are 30 days out. It's hard when you are on separate spiritual pages with your spouse, but God can and will overcome. He honors those who honor Him. He's a good Dad, and we can trust Him.

Please keep us posted.

God is faithful and I can't wait to see what happens!

Last edited by Alpha8207; 03-20-2009 at 08:14 AM..
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Old 03-20-2009, 08:01 AM
 
8,989 posts, read 11,908,702 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jayman1981 View Post
Good day to all.

I've been really playing tug of war with God in regards to my personal life. I truly believe the Lord is directing me to get my house in order. I've been struggling with tithes and offering. I want to start tithing but in order to do so it really will throw me off financially. I really want to start believing and trusting the Lord to tithe regardless of my circumstances, but my wife is not on the same page. I want to be respectful of my wife, but I also want to do right. How do you go about trying to do God's will and also let the wife know that this is what we need to do? Has anybody been in this situation and overcame it? If so how?

My friend, God knows your heart and He loves a cheerful giver. You give what you can give 2%, 5%, 10%, 40%, if you can give every month then great, if things are as tight as you say they are then you need to take care of your business at home first. Some people say they can't give yet still find the money to buy the mocha grande etc... every morning at starbucks. If you say that you want to give but can't then that is good enough for God. He knows your heart, you are not fooling Him. I pray this is the reason your wife doesn't want to give; if not then she is not understanding obedience to God and that our money is not ours-He gave it to us and He can take it away. Pray that she understands.

I hope this helped

Last edited by Fundamentalist; 03-20-2009 at 08:50 AM..
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Old 03-20-2009, 08:30 AM
 
Location: In God's country
1,059 posts, read 2,240,474 times
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Just make sure when you give....your giving for the the right reasons. Not because you feel you have to...
As far as financial....If you give for the right reasons and with your heart...God will provide the rest. How do i know? Because your talking to a women who put her family's last 20.00 in the offering plate. that was all we had....i prayed about it..and thats what i felt led to do. And some how there was money there when the bills needed paid. And its not from any paycheck..cause there isnt one.
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Old 03-20-2009, 08:43 AM
 
Location: MI
1,289 posts, read 1,782,542 times
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We are living through a very rough financial time. The Lord keeps blessing my family, though. I don't tithe a ten percent. I give as I see a need. The other day I was at the library. Someone didn't have any cash with them to pay a late fee. It was a dollar forty. I had it in my wallet, so I payed. I don't like to let my left hand know what my right is doing, but at the same time, I wanted to give you an example of cheerful giving. Such a small amount, but imagine the smile I saw on this man's face...and what he will go and do with that small blessing. Ask the Lord to give you opportunities to show Him through you...whether financial or a kind word.
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Old 03-20-2009, 08:53 AM
 
Location: Cornelius
3,662 posts, read 8,246,946 times
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We began tithing consistently about a month ago. It's about 5% of our income which is about 100% more than what we were giving. You have to start somewhere and God knows your heart. If you wait until your finances are "right", then there's a good chance you'll never start and is where we found ourselves. We have some serious debt and have been paying it down for about 6 months now. We have cut all of our credit cards and finally able to live within our means - and it's awesome! I never knew how simple life could be without using credit cards, and since we've been giving our weekly offering, we have not been "affected" negatively with our finances. When you give back to God what is His, He will take care of you.

But before you can consider giving, there is one thing you must take care of first. Are you the spiritual leader of the household? And if so, does your wife trust you to be the spiritual leader of your household? This must be the first order of reconciliation.
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Old 03-20-2009, 08:54 AM
 
Location: downeast
473 posts, read 590,378 times
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i am a member of a protestant church- the pastor wanted to implement mandatory tithing (mandatory for members). i was against this- my understanding of jesus' words are that there is no set amount to giving- you give what is needed, when it is needed. sometimes it will be $5, sometimes $500, sometimes it might be your time or goods. using a 10% required tithe- too many people see that as i've done my part, nothing more is required of me. my point is, pray and meditate on it and you will be shown what is needed and where it is needed.
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Old 03-20-2009, 09:03 AM
 
Location: Cornelius
3,662 posts, read 8,246,946 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mommax3plus2 View Post
i am a member of a protestant church- the pastor wanted to implement mandatory tithing (mandatory for members). i was against this- my understanding of jesus' words are that there is no set amount to giving- you give what is needed, when it is needed. sometimes it will be $5, sometimes $500, sometimes it might be your time or goods. using a 10% required tithe- too many people see that as i've done my part, nothing more is required of me. my point is, pray and meditate on it and you will be shown what is needed and where it is needed.
I would leave that church if it were me. We started out at 5% because it was good for us and gave us structure. As we feel comfortable, we will be increasing this amount. I suspect the more debt we pay off, the more money we can give back to God.
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Old 03-20-2009, 11:16 AM
 
512 posts, read 1,338,861 times
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Thank you all, for your words of wisdom. To answer your question Carolina_guy I am the spiritual leader of my household. I will admit that I haven't been a very good one though. That is why I am trying to make steps to change. When your daughter has to tell you Daddy I want to go to church, then you know you've got to jump on those opportunities.

I'm realizing that my house is not in order. My kids are not learning God's word like they need to. So who else is better to start doing it. Daddy. I've known for a while that in order to change that, I have to start with myself. Sort of a trickle down affect as I see it.

I appreciate everyones words. I feel more encouraged. I will keep everyone posted.
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Old 03-20-2009, 11:34 AM
 
Location: Cornelius
3,662 posts, read 8,246,946 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jayman1981 View Post
Thank you all, for your words of wisdom. To answer your question Carolina_guy I am the spiritual leader of my household. I will admit that I haven't been a very good one though. That is why I am trying to make steps to change. When your daughter has to tell you Daddy I want to go to church, then you know you've got to jump on those opportunities.

I'm realizing that my house is not in order. My kids are not learning God's word like they need to. So who else is better to start doing it. Daddy. I've known for a while that in order to change that, I have to start with myself. Sort of a trickle down affect as I see it.

I appreciate everyones words. I feel more encouraged. I will keep everyone posted.
Brother, I am with you and found myself in the exact same position. My wife has always understood it is the husband's responsibility to be the spiritual leader, and I failed her miserably in our first 2 years of marriage. We disagreed on many things, but I was just a talker and not a walker.

When I began walking in the Light and putting God first, I began to see the trickle down. Our marriage has never ever been better than it is now, and my wife is getting closer to God because I am too. I think when we (as married couples) put God first in BOTH of our lives, He will bless us. We are now on the same page on many things because we are both seeking His will. Just the other day, she said "this is the man God chose for me." I am finally becoming the Godly man she's always prayed for (although I have a long way to go for sure). She is now confident in the decisions that I make because she trusts with all of her heart I am seeking God's will.
So, I just wanted to share that with you as I totally understand and have had to carry my own cross in this regard. Continue to seek His will for all of your life, and He will direct your path.
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