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Old 08-08-2007, 03:46 PM
 
Location: Nebraska
292 posts, read 932,239 times
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Well I accepted Christ when I was 14. There had been a free movie playing the local theatre so my best friend and I went. It ended up being a movie about the life of Jesus and at the end there was an altar call. Both she and I went up!
However, I still ended up choosing a bad lifestyle a couple years later. Drinking, drugs, that kind of thing. Ended up in a treatment center at the age of 33 where I was baptised in the Holy Spirit!!! That night I was not only delivered of drugs and alcohol but other things as well. My life changed from black to white and I have continued to grow and change ever since!
I will always be thankful to the Lord for all he has done for me.
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Old 08-08-2007, 03:48 PM
 
Location: ARK-KIN-SAW
3,434 posts, read 9,723,462 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruralgalnebraska View Post
Well I accepted Christ when I was 14. There had been a free movie playing the local theatre so my best friend and I went. It ended up being a movie about the life of Jesus and at the end there was an altar call. Both she and I went up!
However, I still ended up choosing a bad lifestyle a couple years later. Drinking, drugs, that kind of thing. Ended up in a treatment center at the age of 33 where I was baptised in the Holy Spirit!!! That night I was not only delivered of drugs and alcohol but other things as well. My life changed from black to white and I have continued to grow and change ever since!
I will always be thankful to the Lord for all he has done for me.
amen! God is good!
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Old 12-01-2008, 10:07 AM
 
Location: Columbus, GA
5 posts, read 6,334 times
Reputation: 11
Post I was shown Hell and the Throne of God at age 15

I was shown Hell and the Throne of God at age 15

“As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one: There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God. They are all gone out of the way, they are together become unprofitable: There is none that doeth good, no, not one (Romans 3:10-12).”

In the fall of 1992, my older brother, Desma, felt an urgency to visit home because of startling revelations from the LORD concerning our family. At the time, Desma was in the service and was stationed at Fort Bragg in North Carolina. While lying in bed he had an out-of-body experience, whereby the LORD allowed his conscious self to depart from his body and enabled him to observe the world from a point of view other than that of the physical body and by means other than those of the physical senses. He said that he was able to see and hear things -- objects that were really there, events and conversations that really took place -- which could not have been seen or heard from the actual position of his body. He felt his spirit leave the barracks in North Carolina at an unimaginable speed. He recalled traveling in the air until he was outside our childhood home. Immediately, he thought why would the LORD show me my parents’ home? He recalled seeing our parents conversing and carrying on day-to-day activities. He also noticed that our grandmother was visiting that particular day. He smiled to himself because he was amazed at what he was seeing.

Suddenly, the LORD focused Desma in on my room. His body hovered outside my window as he peered in on me lying in bed asleep. The LORD opened his spiritual eye, and he could see demonic spirits surrounding my bed. His heart sank in disbelief. The LORD told him that although He had His hands upon my life, He was going to allow the enemy to attack me in my mind.

As my brother shared this experience, my heart sank as fear overtook me. I did not want to believe him, and instead, I believed he had had a hallucination. “Acacia, do you understand?” he asked. “The LORD is going to allow you to lose your mind, yet He will open your spiritual eyes and show you things you never thought possible. “It’s not even about you. There are so many young people that are dying and going to hell,” he continued. “The enemy has deceived them to believe that there’s no hell or made them to believe the lie that they can commit their lives to Christ when they’re older. But the reality is that many of them are not living to become older adults. They are dying unprepared for eternity and are suffering the consequences of not accepting Jesus Christ as their personal savior while they had a chance to on earth.”

Desma then shared a horrific vision with me that the LORD gave him concerning a clown. This is the vision of the clown, which my older brother interpreted and revealed to me during the fall of 1992.

“He hath blinded their eyes, and hardened their heart; that they should not see with their eyes, nor understand with their heart, and be converted, and I should heal them (John 12:40).”

The Clown

Laughter and screaming filled the air, jokes and giggles were everywhere. They ran, jumped, and danced with glee, moving passionately to the rhythm of his beat. The clown was guiding them on a tour. On every corner they would get sidetracked because the clown always enticed them to try something new. Many of these acts were sensual and sinister, tempting the teenagers to push beyond their moral limits. Some strongly desired to heed the signs of caution, but they feared rejection by their peers. A few enjoyed the laughs but had a change of heart; they feared that their careless lifestyles would lead to regrettable mistakes. As they turned and walked slowly down the dark and lonely road, they heard jesters and ridicule but continued on. The clown laughed gleefully as he juggled and performed with conviction.

In the beginning, the clown wasn’t as persuasive because words of wisdom ruled the teens’ hearts. Some followed willingly, knowing the path could possibly lead to destruction, but they reasoned that the ways of the world were more appealing than following Christ. The clown told them that they had now gone too far to go back; God would not forgive them.

Others walked blindly, not knowing the truth. Yet, deep in their hearts, they knew their ways were wrong. Nevertheless, they allowed the desires for instant gratification to rule their convictions. The teens wanted to be accepted and fit in with the crowd, but they didn’t realize they were gambling with their souls. Occasionally, they attended church to please their parents, but their hearts were far from God. Some of the messages they heard there were so convincing that they strongly felt the urge to change. And yet church was not as entertaining as their friend, the clown, who freely granted them their hearts’ desires. The clown did not require that they change; in fact, he encouraged and applauded their independence. He claimed that the youth needed no laws but should be left free to follow their own wills, which would always guide them right; laws were a restriction of their liberty.

The clown turned flips and stood on his head. He juggled several balls and told humorous jokes in order to entertain the teens. He was very subtle in his motives -- he bided his time until he had won their confidence and captured their undivided attention. Behind his fake, painted grin lurked a world of craftiness.

The teens allowed this clown to persuade them as he had the fallen angels. He knew that they were now bound to him and their consciences rendered powerless and ineffective -- thus, no longer a threat. The teenagers no longer felt any compunction and were comfortable in their lifestyles. The clown danced as he led them to the edge of a cliff. They laughed loudly, believing this was a joke -- but the clown was not laughing anymore.

His charm and joking had transformed into an evil grin. They shrieked as darkness began to unfold. Shivering in disbelief, they tried to escape, but the clown’s grip was too strong. Without their knowledge, he had slipped shackles around their wrists and ankles. No matter how hard they pulled and tugged, they could not free themselves. They were defeated and utterly helpless. They now realized his deception and could finally see what their pastors had been telling them all along. They screamed in an unutterable torment as they fearfully heard the cries of the damned -- cries that would soon be their own. They fell to their knees and pleaded in terror and self-pity. Tears streamed down their frightened faces. They wept and emitted sobs so deep that they hurt. They trembled and covered their faces from the shame of it all. The clown laughed sinisterly, and as he looked into their tear-filled eyes, he callously pulled the chains. They all tumbled into the depths of hellfire, never to be free again. Now it was too late.

My brother went on to explain to my mother that the LORD was allowing our family to go through this trial in order to bring us closer to Him. At the time, Desma’s and my parents were not on speaking terms and were having difficulties in their marriage. There was so much bitterness and strife between them. The LORD said in order to get my father’s attention He had to touch what was close to His heart, and that was me. My brother saw a vision of my mother riding an untamed horse and fighting to stay on. He interpreted this to mean that the LORD saw her as a prayer warrior, and although hell would come against her, she would remain steady in her relationship with the LORD. As a result of her faith, the LORD would answer her prayers; He would restore her marriage and restore my mind.

I knew in my spirit that there was truth to what my brother said. At the time, the LORD was really dealing with me to surrender my life to Him. I was fifteen years old and it was the beginning of my ninth grade year. I desired to serve Him, yet there was a stronger pull to live contrary to His word because of peer pressure. The desire to fit in was so great that I began to disregard in my heart certain morals and values. I had not overtly changed -- I was still the same quiet and reserved person, yet I knew my heart was beginning to harden toward God. Conviction set in daily when I entered the school lunchroom and saw a young man seated in the corner quietly reading his Bible. I had an inward desire to join him, yet I noticed he was alone, and I was not yet ready to make this type of stand and risk being an outcast and having few friends.

I met a young man named Eric, who was a junior and on the football team. He was very persistent in attempting to win my heart and affection. He asked me several times to go out on a date with him, but I told him several times that I was not allowed to date until I was at least seventeen. He joked, saying, “Don’t tell me you’re one of those church girls. You know, a Christian.” There was silence as I held the phone in my hand. “So, are you a Christian?” he asked. I wanted to say yes, but for some reason fear took hold of me. “No, I’m not a Christian,” I said.

I cannot say how, but I felt that something in the atmosphere was different. It was as if I sensed darkness and felt as if I was going into some deep depression. I began to lose focus and concentration. I was walking down the hall once and unknowingly dropped my purse. One of my peers ran up to me and said, “Hey, Acacia, you dropped your purse.” She picked it up and gave it to me. She expected to hear a response of gratitude, but all I gave her was a blank stare. She sensed something was wrong and asked if I was okay.

Fear took hold of me, and I found it difficult to sleep at night. It got to the point that I was afraid to sleep in my room and asked my mother if I could sleep with her. I asked her to please pray for me because I was afraid and felt an evil presence around me. She said something to me that I will never forget. “Acacia I will pray for you, but you have to learn to seek Jesus for yourself,” she said. “You can’t get to heaven on my salvation.”

For the first time in my life, I felt that I was in a dilemma that my mother could not get me out of.

“In thoughts from the visions of the night, when deep sleep falleth on men, Fear came upon me, and trembling, which made all my bones to shake. Then a spirit passed before my face; the hair of my flesh stood up: It stood still, but I could not discern the form thereof: an image was before mine eyes, there was silence…. (Job 4:13-16).”

I lay awake all night close to my mom’s side because fear had such a firm grip on me. While lying in the bed I sensed an evil presence near me. I immediately clung to my mother, only to look up and see there was a demon that had the face of a man lying in the bed with me. I never saw so much hatred. His face was red as he grimaced. I could literally hear him growling under his breath. I screamed at the top of my lungs and said, “Get out of here!” It was the middle of the night. I awoke my mom. She said that when I screamed she jumped up and ran out of the room to get my dad who was lying on the couch in the living room. She recalled hearing me scream, but my voice was deep and sounded like a man. It immediately alarmed her because she knew it wasn’t my voice. She also sensed an evil presence in the room and said she actually heard voices. One voice said loudly, “We’re going to drive the daughter crazy and her mom crazy!” About the same time this took place, my father recalled hearing a voice that said, “Aaron, are you ready yet?”

I began to notice strange occurrences when I would see things and hear voices. I would ask my parents, “Did you see that -- did you hear that?” This was the loneliest I felt in my entire life. I stopped eating and speaking. I ceased to cry because the hurt and confusion were so strong that I felt I didn’t have any more tears to cry. My parents could not get through to me and eventually sought medical attention because I had gone days without a desire to eat and they could not get me to open up and share my feelings.

Although I would not speak, I had a strong sense of my surroundings and was aware that my parents came in daily and read healing scriptures and prayed on my behalf. I don’t recall them allowing doubt and unbelief to come out of their mouth in my presence, although I knew they were hurting. My mother would try to spoon feed me and would beg me to eat. Daily, she would try to get me to open up and say just one word for her.

Eventually, they decided to give me a feeding tube. I saw my mother’s pain and would see her cry, yet I didn’t know what to say. It came to the point that I didn’t know reality and confusion had come in so strongly that I didn’t feel anyone would truly be able to understand my pain.

The LORD revealed Himself to me through several visions while I was in this state. One night while I lay in the hospital bed, I saw a vision. I am confident it was a vision because I was wide awake. The room was completely dark, but the vision brought a bright light into the room.
The Vision

The children were clothed in white, and their hands were clasped together as they slowly walked clockwise in a circle. I knew they were not of this world, yet very real. They made direct eye contact with me without flinching. Their eyes never blinked once; they looked boldly into my eyes as they chanted these warning words from an all too familiar horror movie I had watched as a child, except the words were totally opposite.

“1…2 Jesus coming for you
3…4 Say your prayers
5…6 Get it straight
7…8 Before it’s too late
9…10 He’s coming again

“Are you ready, are you ready, are you ready?”

I was deeply troubled and confused as to why the kids felt a need to warn me. I was completely perplexed but too frightened at the time to cry out to God. “I’m not a sinner. I’m a Christian,” I cried on the inside. “I don’t drink or smoke, and I'm not sexually promiscuous. This must be some kind of mistake.” Then, I heard a loud voice deep within my spirit. It was too loud to be mistaken for my thoughts. “You don’t have a personal relationship with Me. If I called for your soul tonight, you would not enter into My presence.”

“For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast
(Ephesians 2:8-9).”

While in the hospital, I had what seemed to be an out-of-body experience. I felt as if I was in this place physically, but my soul had descended into hell. I did not see fire nor did I see people in torment, however, I could clearly hear the cries of the damned. Demonic spirits chased me as I ran for my life, trying to escape from that awful place. I feared what would happen if they caught me. I had nowhere to run or hide; there appeared to be no exit. Out of nowhere appeared a wooden cross. It was as if it didn’t belong there. I was faint hearted, yet it appeared that I was supernaturally given the strength to out-run my enemies and climb up the cross. I sat in the corner of the crossbars and clung to this cross with all the strength I had within me. The demonic spirits tried to pull me from the cross but a fire encircled the cross and it prevented them from touching me. These spirits begin to scream out obscenities and were very angry.

“When the wicked, even mine enemies and my foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell
(Psalm 27:2).”

Suddenly, the cross began to ascend into the heavens. It was as if the cross extended farther and farther until it reached a depth so high that I could not begin to imagine or measure how high it went. There I stood in heaven and saw the biggest throne I have ever seen in my entire life, upon which a man was seated. I could not see His face for there was a glory upon it, and I could only see from His waist down. I knew that I was standing before the God of the universe. I knew that all authority was His in heaven and upon earth.

Upon seeing Him, without thought, I immediately bent over trembling at the awesome sight of Him. I had never trembled in this manner; every bone in my body shook. So in awe, I began to eliminate; I felt the urine fall down my legs. I felt so unclean, unworthy, and like an awful sinner in the presence of a holy God. Tears burst from my eyes. My chest heaved, and snot ran from my nose in ropes. I pleaded between sobs for Him to have mercy upon my soul, to not send me to hell. I awaited my judgment and cringed at the thought of darkness swallowing me whole. Just when I thought I would never be able to stand on my own two feet again and hold my head up high, He extended a mercy and love I had never known."

“And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the LORD (Psalm 40:3).”

Suddenly, I was drenched in blood, but not my own. Just as suddenly as the blood appeared, it vanished and was replaced with a shiny white robe. I felt such a peace, and a song burst from within me. The spirit of the LORD filled my lungs and sang through me. My voice was like the angels’, a voice that surpassed the voice of many famous singers upon earth. My vocal cords reached notes that were so high, that is humanly impossible to reach alone. The song I sang is noted in Psalm 50.

“Have mercy on me, oh Lord, according to your unfailing love, according to your great compassion, blot out my transgressions, I will be whiter than snow, by the blood I’m made whiter than snow.” I can’t recall how long this experience lasted. I just know that once I was in His presence I did not want to leave. I pleaded with Him not to send me back to earth. He said it was not yet my time; there was much that I needed to accomplish. I promised Him that I would tell everyone about the love and grace He bestowed upon me in my affliction. I was shown other parts of heaven but cannot bring them to memory, for they were blocked.

“Now the man out of whom the devils were departed besought him that he might be with him: but Jesus sent him away, saying, Return to thine own house, and shew how great things God hath done unto thee. And he went his way, and published throughout the whole city how great things Jesus had done unto him (Luke 8:38-39).”

This is an abridged version of the author’s testimony; she is currently writing a book to tell the whole account of her story.

Acacia Slaton Beumer, Author of Launch Out Into The Deep!
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Old 12-01-2008, 03:45 PM
 
Location: Columbus, GA
5 posts, read 6,334 times
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Amazing testimony of God's grace.
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Old 12-25-2008, 12:55 PM
 
1 posts, read 1,437 times
Reputation: 12
Smile My Miracle that broke my addiction

Hello everyone, this is actually the first time I've ever posted anything in a blog, but I felt compelled to share something that I felt was miraculous. I'd like to first give a little background information about myself to give you an idea of who I am. I was adopted at 3 weeks old by a single woman who was a teacher. She raised me in the baptist Church in Miami, Florida. We never lack the essentials like shelter food and clothing. But we didn't have much money. I really never cared much for school, mainly because I never really new what I wanted to do with my life and didn't like the hours. However I graduated on time and was on my way to college. But during my 11th grade year I had gotten involved with a Rhythm and Blues group. I felt I'd found a hobby that could eventually turn into a career.

Well to make a long story short, we started to do performances and eventually found ourselves involved with a major producer shortly there after. Well along with this new hobby came others like drinking and smoking marijuana. At first it was only on occasions like the weekend or maybe a day out of the week. But as time progressed and I was in my last years of school it started to be more frequent. They say that marijuana can be a gate way drug but I beg to differ. This was my drug of choice and I dreaded the thought of experimenting with any others, But thats just me.

Now even tho this never lead me to becoming curious about other drugs this became an abusive substance. Or to put it better... I abused this substance. It never caused me to act out or get in to careless behavior but it definitely gave me a criminal record for purchasing it or driving while using it or having it in my car. This devastated me because I new that if I had a criminal record this would affect my fall back plans of a stable job or college.

I'd taken time off after I graduated to pursue my musical aspirations and give my full attention to the group. Well to make along story even shorter, The lead singer started using other drugs like pcp and cocaine. Now there may be people who are functioning addicts, he wasn't one of them. He completely lost it and was in and out of mental institutions for his erratic behavior. And I mean ERRATIC!! Well I was traumatized, Depressed and stressed out, so of course I did the first thing a young guy in my situation thought made sense. I smoked even more cannibus. Well time started to tick away and I was almost 10 years out of school going from lame job to even lamer jobs trying to make ends meat. I couldn't hold down a relationship because of finances. I would always met Mrs. Right for me, but I couldn't hold on. Well I did the only thing a guy like me thought made sense again. I smoked even more weed.

Well even though this wasn't cocaine or something worse, I was hooked and I needed help. Now I grew up in church and I had a wonderful Christian mom. But I would always down play my involvement with Marijuana so I wouldn't have to hear her mouth. Well I started feeling sorry for myself and really even more depressed. I started looking for answers everywhere and they just weren't good enough. So now desperate, broke, angry, sad, depressed, and annoyed I did the only thing a guy like me thought made sense. I got down on my knees and took it to God. I mean I went online looking for prayers to break generational curses etc.., I mean the works.

Well a couple of days into all this praying and searching I was sitting in my home with some friends while one of them was rolling a joint. And after rolling, lighting and taking a couple puffs it was my turn. But when they passed it to me I didn't want it. ha,... I really didn't want to smoke..... now you may not think thats a big deal but I was like 3 to 10 joints a day into this 12 year habit and I didn't want it anymore. I thought this was just one day out of my life that I didn't want to smoke big deal. But the next day it was the same and the next and the next. Now....Hmmmm.... what was that all about.... Well I can say this with all my heart, I'm no Saint but I know God when I see him and that was definitely him removing addiction from me. I sit here today writing you free of addiction and the minute I chose to seek Jesus Christ was the minute he started to change me and reform my life. I have had other miracles since then as well but this one was an oh boy for me, because I was what people in my peer group call a (Weed Head). I know now that if I want to fight any battle in my life I must seek the kingdom of God and get to know him because he's the only cure I need in this world. Thank you for Reading my testimony. And may God bless you in your search for his Kingdom.

Last edited by Young Lion 1979; 12-25-2008 at 01:03 PM..
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Old 12-25-2008, 01:42 PM
 
Location: Out of Florida........
4,309 posts, read 6,413,205 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Young Lion 1979 View Post
Hello everyone, this is actually the first time I've ever posted anything in a blog, but I felt compelled to share something that I felt was miraculous. I'd like to first give a little background information about myself to give you an idea of who I am. I was adopted at 3 weeks old by a single woman who was a teacher. She raised me in the baptist Church in Miami, Florida. We never lack the essentials like shelter food and clothing. But we didn't have much money. I really never cared much for school, mainly because I never really new what I wanted to do with my life and didn't like the hours. However I graduated on time and was on my way to college. But during my 11th grade year I had gotten involved with a Rhythm and Blues group. I felt I'd found a hobby that could eventually turn into a career.

Well to make a long story short, we started to do performances and eventually found ourselves involved with a major producer shortly there after. Well along with this new hobby came others like drinking and smoking marijuana. At first it was only on occasions like the weekend or maybe a day out of the week. But as time progressed and I was in my last years of school it started to be more frequent. They say that marijuana can be a gate way drug but I beg to differ. This was my drug of choice and I dreaded the thought of experimenting with any others, But thats just me.

Now even tho this never lead me to becoming curious about other drugs this became an abusive substance. Or to put it better... I abused this substance. It never caused me to act out or get in to careless behavior but it definitely gave me a criminal record for purchasing it or driving while using it or having it in my car. This devastated me because I new that if I had a criminal record this would affect my fall back plans of a stable job or college.

I'd taken time off after I graduated to pursue my musical aspirations and give my full attention to the group. Well to make along story even shorter, The lead singer started using other drugs like pcp and cocaine. Now there may be people who are functioning addicts, he wasn't one of them. He completely lost it and was in and out of mental institutions for his erratic behavior. And I mean ERRATIC!! Well I was traumatized, Depressed and stressed out, so of course I did the first thing a young guy in my situation thought made sense. I smoked even more cannibus. Well time started to tick away and I was almost 10 years out of school going from lame job to even lamer jobs trying to make ends meat. I couldn't hold down a relationship because of finances. I would always met Mrs. Right for me, but I couldn't hold on. Well I did the only thing a guy like me thought made sense again. I smoked even more weed.

Well even though this wasn't cocaine or something worse, I was hooked and I needed help. Now I grew up in church and I had a wonderful Christian mom. But I would always down play my involvement with Marijuana so I wouldn't have to hear her mouth. Well I started feeling sorry for myself and really even more depressed. I started looking for answers everywhere and they just weren't good enough. So now desperate, broke, angry, sad, depressed, and annoyed I did the only thing a guy like me thought made sense. I got down on my knees and took it to God. I mean I went online looking for prayers to break generational curses etc.., I mean the works.

Well a couple of days into all this praying and searching I was sitting in my home with some friends while one of them was rolling a joint. And after rolling, lighting and taking a couple puffs it was my turn. But when they passed it to me I didn't want it. ha,... I really didn't want to smoke..... now you may not think thats a big deal but I was like 3 to 10 joints a day into this 12 year habit and I didn't want it anymore. I thought this was just one day out of my life that I didn't want to smoke big deal. But the next day it was the same and the next and the next. Now....Hmmmm.... what was that all about.... Well I can say this with all my heart, I'm no Saint but I know God when I see him and that was definitely him removing addiction from me. I sit here today writing you free of addiction and the minute I chose to seek Jesus Christ was the minute he started to change me and reform my life. I have had other miracles since then as well but this one was an oh boy for me, because I was what people in my peer group call a (Weed Head). I know now that if I want to fight any battle in my life I must seek the kingdom of God and get to know him because he's the only cure I need in this world. Thank you for Reading my testimony. And may God bless you in your search for his Kingdom.
He is worthy!! Thank God for you. He's calling His children and you're one of them. He is coming soon, you know that don't you? I'm so happy you're listening to the sound of His voice. Welcome.


Your sister in Christ Jesus
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Old 11-09-2009, 11:00 PM
 
Location: Columbus, GA
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Thanks for sharing, I really enjoyed your testimony.
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Old 11-09-2009, 11:03 PM
 
Location: Columbus, GA
5 posts, read 6,334 times
Reputation: 11
A foundation is so relevant. You eventually came back to the place of peace you remembered at 14. Thanks for sharing.
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Old 05-14-2011, 07:21 PM
 
1 posts, read 895 times
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Default God has given me many different testimonies

i believe Gods testimony is a miracle God has done in your life.. this is my testimony of how Jesus Christ saved my life with some preaching of the gospel of The Lord Jesus Christ following it.. I want to share with you the story of how Jesus Christ saved my life in such a way that it shows his glory so much and that The Bible - The Living Word of God is true. id like to share what He did for me to you in hopes that you will believe in Him and understand that it is Him who came and died on the cross for you and loves you more than you could ever imagine.. so.. here we go.. ( please listen to the whole story even tho the beginning may seem a little weird ) i was on anti depressants for a lil while and i had been to doctor after doctor trying to figure out why i was having these crazy symptoms but things just kept getting worse at the time i didnt know i had lymes disease and some other things that were wrong and how serious they could be, i got to the point where i was so fed up. i started looking up ways on the computer to try and find a way to make it easy to do something to myself.. i bookmarked a few things on the computer and my mom found out. then, she invited 2 members of a christian church to come over. the 3 of them were in my living room and prayed to Jesus for a revelation to take place ( a revealing from God ) later that same night this is what happened.. i was in my laundry room and i started talking to Jesus i said God "im telling you im going to kill myself, if i do will i go to a bad place?" right after i had said this i turned to my right and looked at my washing machine. the door was usually always closed but not on this night and because it wasnt closed i saw a sticker that had a picture of fire on it and it read warning.. i was obviously pretty shocked.. i had just asked that question and then i saw that.. i got scared and at this point i was basically looking for God to tell me that it was ok to take myself out ( i asked that question to God in my head, i say that for a reason ) then, ( in my head ) i said to God "please make it clearer to me if i take myself out will i go to a bad place?" right after i said that i turned to my right and my nephews hoodie was usually always in his room not on this night, i turned and looked at it and on it was a picture of Jesus on the cross and it read i love you this much, it was just so amazing but i wanted out so bad i was going through alot, then the last tme i asked ( i said this out loud ) i said " God please make it clearer to me if i take myself out will i go to a bad place?" right after that i turned around and looked at my calendar from church, on it was scripture that seemed to be an answer to my question. the question was if i do will i go to a bad place and the scripture read No, the word is very near you and in your heart for you to observe, so i was like oh that may be God telling me that it is ok to end it and that i will be ok. ( remember i had asked that last question out loud ill explain that in a min ) so i had pretty much convinced myself enough that i was prob going to do somethig to myself. the next morning my mom found out and she said brandon did you look up in The Bible the chapter with that scripture in it? ( she wasnt even sure what it was going to say ) i said no, she said well you should. out of all the hundreds of pages in The Bible she turns to the chapter called the offer of life and death and in that chapter Jesus says choose life. ever since then ive known what other people had been trying to tell me was true, that The Bible is ALL true and that it is The Living Word of God not written by man alone, it is actually written by God but man was used to write it, and His Word says that all have fallen short of the glory of God and have sinned. that is why God did what we could not do for ourselves, in The Bible He says that He sent His one and only Son into the world to die for our sins so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life. see the devil is decieving and will try and lie to us by telling us that The Word of God is not true and that Jesus is not the only one that can save us and other non sense, i believe when i asked God to make it clearer and asked this out loud that the devil heard and was trying to get me but God turned it around for the good. the demons cant read our thoughts but they can hear if theyre around and they try to whisper lies into our heads. ok so since we have all sinned we need Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior of our lives. God says we must be born again to enter the kingdom of God. the way that we are born again is by acknowledging and confessing to God that we know we are sinners and have sinned against Him, that we beleive that Jesus died on the cross to pay the penalty for our sins and that we are sorry and want Him to come into our hearts and be our Lord and Savior. " That if you confes with your mouth, ' Jesus is Lord, ' and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved." - Romans 10:9-10. then we must repent - be sorry and turn from our sins and follow The Lord. if you believe this and want to be saved and want Jesus to come into your heart and be your Lord and Savior you can pray something like this to The Lord... " God, i know that i have done wrong : that i am a sinner and not worthy of eternal life. however, i believe that You love me and sent Your Son, Jesus, to die on the cross to pay the penalty for my sin, and to rise from the dead to give me eternal life. i receive this Gift by faith and transfer my trust from my own goodness, resting in the righteousness of Christ and His redeeming work on the cross. Jesus, be my Lord and Savior. Give me strength to turn from my sins and live for you. Amen." if you just prayed that prayer ( or one like it ) welcome to the family of God! Then, you might be wondering whats next? i want to say that alot of people are decieved into believing that you say this prayer and then you dont do much else but we are to have an intimate personal relationship with The Lord... Five keys to growing in your new relationship with God : 1. Read Gods Word - This enables God to speak to you. 2. Pray - This is you speaking to God. 3 Attend Church - Find a church where The Bible is taught as God's Word ( all of it ). God has established the Church as a canopy for those who believe. ( Hebrews 10:23-25) 4. Fellowship with Christian Friends. Find Christian friends who will help you grow as well as hold you accountable for your actions. ( and true friends want you to be like Christ ) 5. Tell Others. Tell someone about what God has done for you. There is no greater joy than not only going to heaven but leading someone to The Lord so that they will go with you. Jesus loves you soooo much you cant even imagine He wants you to seek Him and make Him first, i understand that you do not yet have all the knowledge but you will grow in The Lord Jesus Christ as you continue to seek Him and live for Him and put your trust in Him. by the way if anyone is having strange symptoms or think they may have lymes i encourage you to not get a regular lymes test but a western blot lymes disease test.. The Lord has revealed to me and my family that lymes disease often has gone undetected and people have been misdiagnosed and lymes can be serious and its best to track it down asap because if it continues to go untreated in may very well get worse. Also the best form of treatment for lymes is a machine called the rife machine which has also cured cancer and has helped in the area of many other problems as well. If anyone has lymes or knows of someone with lymes and doesnt have the money to get one, my rife machine is open to anyone.. [mod] personal information-phone/address [/mod] prophecy is to help people believe and i believe strongly that God gives us testimonys for our own personal growth and to help others believe or believe more as well. God bless you all

Last edited by june 7th; 01-17-2012 at 01:43 PM..
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Old 01-17-2012, 12:08 PM
 
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I want to start off by saying how difficult this is for me to share my story with all those who will read this. This is a true story and accurate to the best of my ability to remember.

Even though many of you will never see my face, the thoughts of those scars residing in times past, will without mercy overwhelm me, bringing that dark and tortured heartless nightmare back to a saved man once again. I should tell you even though these memories may bring great sadness to my heart, they by no means thrash me in slavery as they once did in my past. I am a man who has been covered by the blood of One who truly loves me, so much so, that when He took that wicked man that I was, upon Himself, I became stripped and emptied awaiting new instruction, left with a radiant new heart, being saved from the slavery in which I was chained to, for what I thought was an eternity without hope.

Before I move forward in sharing with you my past, you will come to see someone who bore great anger against his father. By my growth In Christ Jesus through His Love releasing me from that dark self made wickedness, I have seen just how lost that my father truly was.His pain, his sadness and his inability to see Christ and what He has to offer, was so far out of reach that he sought no relationship with him, wanting no one to speak with him about God.I sorrow greatly for him with forgiveness and love bringing not the past to the present for any accusation, holding no anger against him but only praying in hope for his soul, knowing that he too can become a mighty tool inthe furthering of God’s word with love being released from the torment within, walking together as brothers In Christ.

As a child I grew up in a home which harbored great physical abuse upon me and my siblings whenever we did anything wrong, or just because our father endured a trying day at work. My memories take me back to a time when my father’s rewards for our wrongs would bring the wrath of his belt, his fist or his open hands, and if by any means he did not feel satisfied, he would grab us by the ankles, hanging us upside down against the wall and would proceed in beating our heads into the floor.

We would be playing with great joy and sharing the thoughts of a child-like fantasy in some made up war theme, playing with little green army men, when suddenly our father, swinging the door open to our room with great force, bringing us to an immediate trembling in fear of the pain that was about to take place, grabbed my brother lifting him under the shoulder with one hand bringing him high and to the wall, proceeded to beat him as if he were a monstrous beast to be killed.

My heart would race and tears would fall from my eyes knowing that I was next and with great confusion and despair I could not find a place to hide avoiding the anger that filled my father’s heart at that very moment. When he finished with his violent corrections inflicted upon my brother, he quickly threw him aside and turned towards me as if a lions hunger was left unsatisfied. Quickly grabbing my shirt by the chest, with great force he threw me against the wall striking me in all vulnerable areas across my body, leaving me feeling each blow like a rippling explosion consuming my body every second. With a quickening speed, he pulled me away from the wall just to slam me back up against it once again, removing the very breath that was left within my body, bringing my cries for my mother to a silence.

Finishing his wrath from exhaustion, he threw me into the dresser as if I were a toy with such strength that it toppled over and crushed me underneath. The pain from the dresser falling upon my body was so over whelming that I again lost my breath, leaving me with an inability to cry out. Then walking out to leave us to care for our own wounds, we laid very still attempting to calm our rapid breathing, crying in silence, horribly afraid to make our father’s wrath any worse.

That night alone in my room after bedtime, by sheer desperation, after so many years of abuse I sought the help with praying hands calling upon satan himself to end my father’s reign in our lives. In peril and torment lasting day after day, hatred and anger became common place within my heart, birthing a vengeance inside of me that only satan himself could place a definition upon, and by no means was this vengeance passive or unresponsive.At the very age of 9 years old, I fired back, but not of my own will….. something in me snapped, and even though I was still small in comparison to my father, I was a monster to be feared.

After a beating from my father one day, as he was walking out, I broke. My whole body and thought process just shattered. It was as if something else hoarded itself within me, taking over. Coming up from the floor with fire screaming from my eyes, I proceeded to attack my father grabbing anything and everything that was available to me at that time.From that moment on I could only remember bits and pieces of flashes as to what happened in all that took place. I had no idea as to what I had done, the most I can remember is my father running from me heading down the stairs and from there everything went black as if my very existence ceased. I awoke and everything in my room was destroyed, I struggled for air but couldn’t get enough, my sight was hindered by a fading blackness that would come and go within seconds, my body was paralyzed with exhaustion having tears falling from my eyes rolling off my cheeks, listening to every drop hit the floor as if I were floating over a pond.

Within a few minutes of my awakening I heard sirens, and soon after, the sounds of many footsteps racing up the stairs running to my room with many people hovering over me as if I were going to die. Sweeping me away just as quickly, they placed me, tied to a gurney, arms and legs restrained from any movement injecting me with something that immediately put me to sleep. When I awoke from the medication that was injected into me, I found myself locked in an institution being assessed for information concerning my long term stay.

It is with great sadness for me to say that my fears and pains were not over, I had a false hope of safety from the pains that I thought would end. I was now starting with a completely new round of torture and pain, one that I knew never existed, leaving me feeling hopeless and worthless as if my very life meant nothing to anyone. I was left without hope of ever feeling the love and joy from any one person again. I soon found myself in a downward spiral facing over 20 different institutions within my years as a youth and young adult.In those institutions, much hardships and hatred was engraved into me, searing within the very depths of my soul. I was at the mercy of those whom I was supposed to trust and yet even they found in their temptations ways to hurt me without others having any knowledge, threatening me of the oncoming doom I would endure if I was to ever reveal their dirty secrets. In my growth, relationships with others was,“to say the least”, unhealthy. All my friendships and relationships were born and tilled in these institutions. My first girl, fights, fun, arguments and schooling were all part of my life in these institutions. I even received my GED under the guardianship of a state institution.

By the time I was sent back to my parents, we were moved by my father’s new job within months of my release. In no time, I lost the ability to remain in my new home because of my disobedience leaving me homeless and in hunger. I ended up finding a place to stay in these apartments that were being constructed about a mile away and my little brother with his great dedication would bring me food and drink, hoping for a better solution to my situation. But in desperation and lack of wisdom and anger, I felt I had to make a choice and I knew no one in the new state that I lived in and knew many from the state that I left , so with little, money and no clothes to pack I left and headed to those I knew best and felt safest. To my surprise very few came to my response for help and being under age I had no real avenue or prospects for work. The streets became my home now and I soon found out just how keen predators were in picking out those who were runaways or just lost and desperate souls.

It happened within the first few days, I was manipulated into going with this man to his home and being as hungry as I was, the promise of money through small tasks, seemed alluring, tempting me to a degree of happiness through the pounding uneasiness residing within the depths of my stomach. As soon as we got to his home these tasks changed and he took off his shirt and requested that I rub his back. I was in danger and I knew it, so giving him a relaxed agreement, I told him to lay down and when he did I immediately ran to and out the door and continued to run until I could take no more hiding in a building shaking in great fear of him everfinding me. You may find this to be a lesser story to which you might have wanted to read, but nevertheless the impact of the immediate danger was real and the offenses of my past granted me the wisdom of discernment. The rules of survival had changed; I was no longer living in a controlled environment and no longer were others also limited by their environment.It was a grab for all, especially in the parts of the city that I found to be easy access to the things I might need.

As days went on I soon became so overwhelmed with hunger that I raided a McDonalds dumpster in order to fill my stomach. And fill that stomach I did. My time spent looming on the streets left cold, hungry and scared had me searching for places on a nightly basis to rest my head in a safe environment. The goodwill dumpsters became my home at night finding warm donated blankets and safety because I could dig myself deep and be hid out of site. About a year later I was so fed up with the life on the streets being unpredictable at every turn I soon pickup a pay phone and dialed 911 telling them that I was a run away from another state and I needed help. It didn’t take long for them to arrive and with gentleness they brought me back to the station and questioned me as to where I was from and do I want to go back. As much as I didn’t want the same thing to continue to happen with me and my father, I said yes I want to go home. The officer got up from the table and went and called my parents house and soon returned with an angered look upon his face, and with compassion and regret he told me my father never wanted to see me again. I was speechless but not surprised and yet for some reason it hurt. I was soon within 1hr or so delivered to a lockup for kids until they could determine what to do with me. Within weeks I was taken in front of the family courts asking me as to why I was in the situation that I was and with the answer explained they were still left as to where to put me. I told them that I could stay at a homeless shelter until my birthday and then they could release me from state guardianship at that time, reaching the age of 18.

To my surprise this was allowed.

After years in this never ending cycle of a perverted and tampered edition to the meaning of life, I did find a way out and to me it was the Holy Grail (Drugs and alcohol).These two mind bending products hid the pain and brought about a boy who in times past could only fantasize such happiness. By no means did this cure me as to what I thought was my life beginning anew, though I was numb to theabominations of my current and past circumstances, what I felt to be a new life soon became a hidden liability changing me into the hunter and not the hunted. I inflicted much pain and tribulations upon those whom I thought were my friends and those closes to me, even the stranger passing by. I’ve stabbed people, and stolen that which never belonged to me, from homes, people, cars and whatever I suppose you could ponder. I received what I reaped in many lockup facilities and each time I came out going right back to the drugs and alcohol, those products I felt to be the loved ones of my life in that I could trust and base my daily decisions on.I know now more than ever that if I hadn’t been under such influence of drugs and alcohol that there would be several people who would be at peace in their lives, not troubled over being victimized by what they may interpret as a heartless piece of trash worthy of only darkness behind bars.

The thrashings of my past living within me dictating and consuming my soul with fire left me alone not only within myself but brought a wall between me and my Creator. It was always the thoughts as to why did all this happen to me, and how can I end this, seeking vengeance with these impurities and evil to be imputed to all those whom I felt transgressed me. I, of myself, became an idol to my surroundings and by no means did I ever feel or consider as though I was undeserving of the satisfaction for revenge. I cannot stress the hatred and the evil that took comfort within the depths of me. I felt as if you all had no right to live and with that I was the one who should address the actions into your deaths. I ponder wicked thoughts in my heart and wished horrible things to take place upon others hoping for their torturous downfall. I wasted so much time hoping for the fall of those who hurt me, wishing those who tore pieces from my heart would suffer a greater torment.I never knew how much time I wasted in allowing such thoughts to consume me.My anger and hatred for others imprisoned me. I was no one but belonged to everyone.

I’ve spent 35 years of my life thinking of nothing more but vengeance. In that energy and emotion I spent so much in thought towards others that I found myself to be lonely, hurting for more, searching for truth and peace from this torture that I myself fed throughout my lifetime.Eventually my anger directed itself inward.I found myself to be thinking bad thoughts just by habit and yet my very heart cried out for understanding and comfort. I could take no more, I knew no way out, my very life was consumed with the thoughts of others and they themselves where carrying on with their lives as joyful and fulfilling without thought of me.I didn’t matter to them.

I was broken and didn’t know it, I was laid up in sickness and dying in an illness that consumed me by habit (Drug Abuse).The doctors knew and spoke of my nearing death.I was finally at the end, I could go no father in my dying body and I knew within the marrow of my very bones that I was condemned.But somehow I knew, even though that every part of me was wicked and undeserving, that there was hope.I knew because I saw no other path that lead out but the path of righteousness. I broke down and cried upon my covers and asked with a fearful broken heart calling out to God, Save me Father, save me, I am so undeserving of your love, let alone your desiring attention, yet I, Father, ask within my cold and wicked heart will you please take this broken man that you see and save me from the depth of hell that I so well deserve. I am yours I surrender; you have all of me, do with me what you wish, just please come into my life and save me my Father.

With those last words coming to a finish in my prayerful cries to God, a voice penetrated every part of my body, giving me that chance, allowing me to know that He would be there for me, but it was the only chance I had.I was afraid, I had not experienced such a thing in my life, but I submitted to His authority and from that very moment on I walked as a new born baby, walking and stumbling throughout my new growth with a new heart. I cried so much in pain from all the years I’ve wasted not knowing the love and forgiveness that God’s Son Jesus Christ has had awaiting for me.My life was made new in Christ, I am in love with others forgiving all, thinking not of the wicked things I can do to others, but having much concern for those who take so much of their own thoughts and time to justify their hatred. I stemmed such growth on the very words of God to counsel me in my every step.If I slipped and reverted to a sneaking wicked habit I would call out the words of encouragement and love from the Bible, Casting down imaginations and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.I knew in my heart that I was a refined individual stepping ever closer to that heavenly gift promised to me.And yes my friends my walk with Christ was not one filled with riches and complete peace in this world but one filled with riches and peace within the Holy Spirits residing presence in my body, having a growth and understanding from the temptations and hard times, refining the new man that I am, founded firmly in God’s word ready for that righteous and revealing Day of Judgment for all.

In all, I may have had some hard times in my growth with God but my heart stayed at peace in Jesus and as I drew closer to Him, He drew closer to me, filling me with his wisdom and love for all.I could not and would not trade my true love“God Almighty the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ” for the life that I left behind.I no longer stand in fire with the hatred of satan within my heart.I now stand in righteousness firmly founded upon the true wisdom in guidance and love for every thought and step I take in this new life.

Our anger that we hold in our hearts, only projects an image of immaturity and loneliness posting our feelings as if we deserved the throne of charity, boasting around about as if we owned authority.We already stand condemned in our lives without Christ Jesus, even if we live a life of joy and prosperity, even if you fill that you stood strong guiding your children up in great wisdom, even if you strived to love and give to others with all your might and dedication.

In all this,… anger,… depression,… happiness,…a giving heart,… a dedicated mother or father or a hard responsible worker, you will still stand condemned being judged alone and your sentence will be that of an eternity in the depths of hell to be tormented forever, never seeing another death again.

If you have not the Father, all that you do stands against the Father being sin and the Father being God Almighty in His Righteous Judgment cannot and will not look upon you with mercy in that revealing day of his Glorious Sons coming for the gathering of his children, those who have died first then those who stand alive next, but all taken within a twinkling of an eye.

But in all this suffering and prideful living, we don’t have to stand alone to face this judgment and condemnation, for we have an attorney (Jesus Christ), an advocate standing with powers far above kings and kings against kings, ruling all as far beyond the sights that man could endure to see or imagine. Where by Him in His unwavering love, will stand in our place and speak of the great sacrifice that has been given to cover our sins. There is no room for Christ in our lives while such bountiful riches in our hearts take weight to the wants and desires of this world in the individual’s life.

You may fill as though it’s too much to give up, too much has been done, I have so much to straighten out, if only I can just put this away. Take this, my very words to heart with all sincerity that I speak to you…. Through the very thoughts being of the same mind in times past that you now have, I give you this promise as even the Father has promised me and all those who come to Him unclean or clean. You can at anytime with a sincere and repentive heart call upon the name of Jesus Christ confessing your sins no matter how big or small and in you will He fill with His Holy Spirit, renewing your hearts in a new birth ready for that redeeming and revealing day of salvation for all whom believe in the Son of God. Remember also this, if by any means this may comfort you, God does not measure salvation by the weight that you carry, instead the Fathers Son Jesus Christ enduring the burdens of sin throughout the world died so that he could lift that weight off your shoulders carrying it for you.

When I gave all that I was to Jesus allowing his love to bear my burdens, I became free in spirit and mind.I can only pray and look upon you with a wishful heart that you would share such a gift with me being released and having hope in the now and ever after.

This testimony is such a small piece from that person you may think you see. But let me please with love speak to you with gratitude thanking my Father God almighty and the Father of our precious Lord Jesus Christ, that by my tribulations and trials, though they be in many numbers, they are the golden cups by which I may drink of for your edification, confirming the love and patience of our Father, tilling and planting the purity oftruth into your groaning hearts for the revelation of Jesus Christ your Savoir and love,that you by no means search any excuse to deny Him but by the wants of your own hearts condemning yourselves to the eternal condemnation awaiting all those that choose by freewill “that” which they can see, leaving behind “that” which they cannot see bringing the very words “Faith and Hope” to no avail.

I pray my most precious love.Please awaken a dead, angry and wounded heart out of the condemnation of eternal fire awaiting those who know you not and give them the same confirming hope that you so graciously blessed upon me.Watch over them and give them light to see, circumcising their minds for your glory and their understanding, walking in confidence on that narrow road leading to your kingdom. Bless them Father Bless them even from the very concerns of my heart, if it be your will.In your Son’s Blessed name I pray for them Father, for your Glory and Kingdom will come, in your name will a new earth be revealed and may we all find Your Welcoming Arms awaiting us in our day of redemption.

Amen.

It would be of great joy to hear from others, lost or saved bringing the Word of our Savoir Jesus Christ together, building strength and unity amongst fellow partakers of the Promises of God for the edification and confirming Word for all.
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Last edited by Miss Blue; 01-17-2012 at 01:43 PM.. Reason: outing personal information is not a good idea here and we do delete it..
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