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Some of you Christians here are actually folks who would make God Himself proud.
Should a hardcore catholic bloke (yes, hardcore, you cut the person open and you find Catholicism running in the blood vessels) get "seriously" involved with an atheist woman?
I'll take your votes at face value. It's a hidden poll, I won't know who's voting, so I'd truly appreciate if non-Christians abstain from voting and not rig this one like the Afghan polls. But feel free to post opinions, if you feel like it.
Some of you Christians here are actually folks who would make God Himself proud.
Should a hardcore catholic bloke (yes, hardcore, you cut the person open and you find Catholicism running in the blood vessels) get "seriously" involved with an atheist woman?
I'll take your votes at face value. It's a hidden poll, I won't know who's voting, so I'd truly appreciate if non-Christians abstain from voting and not rig this one like the Afghan polls. But feel free to post opinions, if you feel like it.
Some folks think we papists are really just atheists anyway
Seriously, as one who has been married for over 30 years here's my 2 cents.
Once the "flush"( ) wears off, there needs to be some common thread.
Interests, beliefs, goals, hopes etc.
Maybe a Catholic and an atheist could spend a lifetime in stimulating debate.
I don't know that it's a cut and dry answer. Sometimes, they say, you can't help who you fall in love with. Myself, personally, I would strongly suggest not getting seriously involved with someone who denies my faith.
If your faith is as important to you as you say, then the person you are involved with should, at a minimum, at least acknowledge that your faith is real. Athiests in general do not even accept that our God exists. The majority indicate that we made Him up or just believe "fairytales".
The uneveness of this proposed relationship would be an enormous hurdle and IMO would not be overcome until either a) you devalue your faith and are no longer hard core or b) the intended partner would come around and at the very least become even agnostic. I would pray that a) would not be an option for you. As believers, we are to hold God above all others, including our significant others. I love God more than my wife and my wife loves God more than me. We both are believers so we understand that directive and what it means to our spiritual and marital health. In your proposed situation, she may not understand your devotion to God and it will probably cause friction.
God's word tells us to not become unevenly yoked. This was directed to believers to not become involved (romatically/marriage wise) with non-believers. Even believers of different faiths (Jewish/Christian, etc.) have extreme issues to address and overcome if they decide to engage in a serious, committed relationship. Inter-denominational arrangements (Catholic/Protestant) even have issues that can cause problems for a couple.
The bottom line is I cannot tell you what to do. Who you fall in love with or get serious with is up to you. I would say to seek God's guidance in this and to frankly address these matters with your intended. I'm not saying it's impossible, but it's very challenging to make these types of relationships work, which is why believers were advised not to enter them in the first place. It just saves heartache and God is simply looking out for your best interests.
You can't help who you fall in love with. What is more important, true love or tradition? What will keep you satisfied and fufilled? I have a feeling it ain't tradition.
Don't discount my comments just cause I am not a Christian. You should marry who you love and who loves you. Besides that Tony....sex is much better with love involved instead of tradition! Ho Hum....boring
The uneveness of this proposed relationship would be an enormous hurdle and IMO would not be overcome until either a) or b)...
OrC: That you are both upfront and honest with one another, and above all mutually accepting and respectful of one another.
June has actually known a few (not many, but a few) couples where one individual was a firm believer, and the other, did not believe at all. The relationships seemed to work for the most part so long as both were accepting of the others mindset. (Keep in mind, however, the demographics of where June is writing from.) The difficulties would seem to crop up in the event that you eventually decided to marry, without all the 'details' having been addressed thoroughly enough in advance. For example: Do you want children? Would an atheist mother agree to having the child baptized, (and attend) along with participating in first holy communion, etc. Would an atheist mother 'insist' that since 'religion' is determined by maternity, that only she should have a say as regards a child's lack of religious upbringing? (Although June tends to regard that as being something more along the lines of a control issue, sometimes.) June also tends to feel that things could become dicey if your and her families weren't accepting of such a relationship. Added stressors. (Then again, once the grandkids start arriving, initial objections can oftentimes begin to dissolve.)
--Has June scared you yet, AC? ("Kids! Who said anything about kids!?")
Quote:
Originally Posted by mams1559
it's very challenging to make these types of relationships work, which is why believers were advised not to enter them in the first place. It just saves heartache and God is simply looking out for your best interests.
While June (sorta) understands what Mams is saying, ^ above, it is something that has always rather intrigued her...She can't help but wonder: If some nice believer asked her out, should she turn him down?
She asks only because she can't help but wonder whether the answer would be different, in reverse. -One is seen as a 'detriment' with potential major 'problems' (believer getting involved with an atheist) while the other could potentially be viewed as an "opportunity" to alter the nonbeliever's stance. Interesting, thinks June...
In either case:
Take gentle dating care!
P.S. Oh, and if you should decide to go for it, and all goes well, remember: "June" is an adorably lovely name for potential female offspring!
This is like asking me if a white guy should fall in love with a black girl.
I don't see any reason why not; you either love someone or not, there is no in-between.
If you are really "hardcore" as you say, I think in the long run you'll find it difficult to be with someone who believes that God does not exist at all. If your belief in God helps to shape your worldview, don't you think it would be hard to be with someone who's worldview is shaped by the belief that God doesn't exist? Maybe it would work, but I think you could find yourself at odds over lots of issues. I'm not married, I'm a Christian, and I've dated my fair share of men who are indifferent about faith. That can be a bit hard in itself, but for someone who denied my faith was real via their own beliefs...well, for me I'm not sure I could do it. In the end though, it's your own conscience that will tell you.
My advice would be first to know the meaning between love and lust..Lust is usually an instantaneous emotion that can disguise itself as love, and can cause many problems because of hasty decisions.
Love actually takes a bit longer and grows as time goes by..I think after a time somepeople from opposite religious upbringing as Catholic and Protestant can work out their differences and even make a decision as to where they will worship together and later as a family..
This is a decision that cannot be hastily made and requires a lot of prayer, understanding and will most certainly test the depth of your love..at the moment and far into your future..
A very serious matter, imo. that is not easily nor quickly resolved..
My advice would be first to know the meaning between love and lust..Lust is usually an instantaneous emotion that can disguise itself as love, and can cause many problems because of hasty decisions.
Love actually takes a bit longer and grows as time goes by..I think after a time somepeople from opposite religious upbringing as Catholic and Protestant can work out their differences and even make a decision as to where they will worship together and later as a family..
This is a decision that cannot be hastily made and requires a lot of prayer, understanding and will most certainly test the depth of your love..at the moment and far into your future..
A very serious matter, imo. that is not easily nor quickly resolved..
In line with Miss Blue's post . . . it would be easier to judge if you were to describe the things you find desirable enough to want to get more involved with her.Perhaps YOU could make two columns (for YOUR use . . . not ours) . . . one for her physical and other attributes . . . NOT involving her mind or personality . . . that you find attractive. The second for her personality and mind . . . her interests, lifestyle, likes and dislikes, values, goals, etc. . . . that you find attractive. If the first column wins . . . it's probably not a wise move.
Last edited by MysticPhD; 10-07-2009 at 07:43 PM..
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) wears off, there needs to be some common thread.
This is like asking me if a white guy should fall in love with a black girl.