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Old 10-17-2009, 08:49 PM
 
3,067 posts, read 3,495,871 times
Reputation: 241

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Quote:
Originally Posted by DaniMae1 View Post
Okay. So you can't be friends anymore with a divorced guy cause .........
It's not just "church people"

Its the way we all are.

The truth is that when a well liked husband and wife get a divorce that they will end up splitting up their friends too along with the furniture.

Not in ever case, but mostly thats the way it goes...

It's not a fun thing, and what Im saying is not what I would like the world to be like if he world were a perfect..

But what Im saying is the way it is...

and it has nothing to do with people's faith...for it's a common way all people end up handling this type of divorce situation.

I know the guy getting divorced might look at his married friends and question, "Why dont they want to hang with me like before?"

But thats he way it is...
There is a very real, very deep, feeling that to make a special effort to be friends with he husband means you are automatically cutting all ties to his wife..

It means that if you happen to mention to the wife that you had the husband over for dinner like in the old days, that we have disrespected her.
You hurt her for telling her that.
That if you had truly been her friend you would not have had her husband over to your house.

There is the very real feeling that everything you might do with one will have to be forever hidden from the other to keep from hurting their feelings.

and the other thing is....Divorce is scary, and you are scared to death you might say the wrong thing.

I remember before the divorce that the 4 of us used to love to go skiing in the winter.
The husband and I would sit in the bar while the girls talked with each other about kids and babies., then we would all go out to eat later...Gosh we all had a great time.

While I guess I could still have invited my divorced friend to go up skiing, the whole thing just seemed like it was going to be non-stop sadness.....

Like we were attempting to recapture a feeling that is gone forever.

It may be hard to hear, but the truth is what i have said..

Sometimes some of the pain that getting a divorce brings with it, is the ending of the close friendships you had with other married couples....
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Old 10-17-2009, 08:49 PM
 
2,569 posts, read 3,100,630 times
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<<"The soul that sins shall die???">> Really now!

To that I say..."The soul that sins is HUMAN!!!" Remember, "he who is without sin, let him cast the first stone."
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Old 10-17-2009, 08:54 PM
 
2,569 posts, read 3,100,630 times
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Harold Kupp...I'd like to introduce you to Alan Molstad! You two have a world of similarities!

For the sake of church, I so hope the two of you'se are in the minority!!!
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Old 10-17-2009, 09:00 PM
 
3,067 posts, read 3,495,871 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chacho_keva View Post
Harold Kupp...I'd like to introduce you to Alan Molstad! You two have a world of similarities!
Hi Harold, let me teach you our secret handshake, then we can begin our plans to take over the world....
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Old 10-17-2009, 09:01 PM
 
7,790 posts, read 10,470,982 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Harold Kupp View Post
Ummmm what are we to think when an atheist emphasizes by saying "Dear god"? (And a little "g" at that!)
Dear God, (capital "G") Harold! Don't act so shocked! -As you yourself stated: An atheist emphasized her statement using the words 'dear god.'

So be it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Harold Kupp
June - Those who depend on the Bible for wisdom would find little difference between Judas killing himself and a treacherous husband killing himself. The location served his purpose - a dramatic last word if you will.

Our human side can sympathize but the Biblical side realizes that the man was making his spiritual reality a physical fact. "The soul that sins shall die"

HK
Dear Harold,

-Just two quick comments/points here:

1- June can't help but wonder why you always answer for your wife. Doesn't Donna have a voice, and/or isn't she entitled to one?

2- June does not care that an 'interpretation' could be made that there may (or may not) be a "Biblical side" that realizes that some man was making 'his spiritual reality a physical fact.' -And why?

-Because whatever "biblical" or "spiritual" fact that may be, nothing, but nothing therein warrants a person taking their own life!!!

Give June a break.

We're talking a suicide here. And yes: "Dear God, with a capital G!"

Take gentle compassionate care.
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Old 10-17-2009, 09:06 PM
 
Location: UPSTATE SC
1,405 posts, read 2,114,391 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DaniMae1 View Post
Unfortunatly June you'd have to be there awhile before you figured out if questioning was welcomed. Everyone feels welcomed at first.
So true!!
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Old 10-17-2009, 09:11 PM
 
988 posts, read 1,577,951 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by alanMolstad View Post
Hi Harold, let me teach you our secret handshake, then we can begin our plans to take over the world....
chuckle....


HK
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Old 10-17-2009, 09:11 PM
 
Location: UPSTATE SC
1,405 posts, read 2,114,391 times
Reputation: 636
Quote:
Originally Posted by june 7th View Post
Dear God, (capital "G") Harold! Don't act so shocked! -As you yourself stated: An atheist emphasized her statement using the words 'dear god.'

So be it.



Dear Harold,

-Just two quick comments/points here:

1- June can't help but wonder why you always answer for your wife. Doesn't Donna have a voice, and/or isn't she entitled to one?

2- June does not care that an 'interpretation' could be made that there may (or may not) be a "Biblical side" that realizes that some man was making 'his spiritual reality a physical fact.' -And why?

-Because whatever "biblical" or "spiritual" fact that may be, nothing, but nothing therein warrants a person taking their own life!!!

Give June a break.

We're talking a suicide here. And yes: "Dear God, with a capital G!"

Take gentle compassionate care.
June I so agree with this post. Life is precious.
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Old 10-17-2009, 09:11 PM
 
7,790 posts, read 10,470,982 times
Reputation: 3397
Quote:
Originally Posted by DaniMae1 View Post
Unfortunatly June you'd have to be there awhile before you figured out if questioning was welcomed. Everyone feels welcomed at first.
June's a 'quick study.'

Very quick.
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Old 10-17-2009, 09:13 PM
 
Location: Nowhere'sville
2,345 posts, read 3,823,251 times
Reputation: 701
Default alan...I think you are wrong.

People's feelings get hurt. It is part of life. Just mentioning the ex wife to the ex husband shouldn't hurt feelings. If a person is THAT sensitive they've got a serious problem. As the child of divorced parents I can say that this wasn't the case. Friends and couples still came around both households. It wasn't a big deal. Friends are supposed to be friends even when things are tough.
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