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Unread 10-23-2009, 09:15 PM
 
1,935 posts, read 2,908,425 times
Reputation: 1205
I am not a person to tell another person they have or have kids or it's against God. I'm am not a person to tell another person not having kids is evil. It is up to each individual person/couple and God. It's between them. However, I will say this:

God said be fruitful and multiply. God said rely on Him and He will provide. God said come to Him and He will give you rest. He will sustain us. He is our rock, our strength. God said raise a child up in the way he should go and he will not depart from it (paraphrasing).

People not wanting to have kids because of finances or it doesn't fit into their lifestyle are, IMO, being selfish. Is that always the case? No. Do I know each and every story/reason for people to not want to have kids? No. It could be there are reasons God is not giving some the desire to have kids. Maybe he knows something they don't. I'm not making light of the decision/choice to have or not have kids. As I said, the decision to have kids is between the couple and God.

However, keep this in mind ... if one is a believer in Christ/God and is afraid to have kids because of finances or their current situation, whatever, how much faith are they putting into the God they claim to love? FOR ME, if I would have waited to be financially secure to get married, I'd still be single. But I'm not. If I waited until all our ducks were in a row to have kids, I'd still not have them. The Lord blessed me in both areas when I didn't think it wise to proceed that way. I couldn't see how we were going to make it, just starting out and by my 3rd anniversary having 2 kids. Deep in debt from the medical expenses. Both working just to barely keep afloat. But we put our trust in Him and our faith in Him and He did not disappoint or let us down.

Were there serious struggles both financially and medically? Yes. Did my kids ever go hungry or without? No. Did they/we always have what was new and what everyone else had? No. Did we have name-brand anything? Mostly no, unless it came from a thrift shop. But we always had the essentials. We were clean, housed and had food. You quickly learn what is essential and what is a perk in life. A vehicle that runs -- essential. A new car with all the bells and whilstles -- perk. Having the basic necessities doesn't mean having to go 'without'. You learn what is of true value and what is just 'all that glitters'.

Growing up I was 5th out of 6 kids. Both parents worked to make ends meet. We all had to do our part to keep the household together and running. There were hard times and struggles, but we all survived and I think we're all better for it. Same with my family.

God always provides. People need to remember that. God does not give you more than you can handle.
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Unread 10-23-2009, 09:43 PM
 
Location: USA
1,848 posts, read 2,466,480 times
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Quote:
By not having kids, it's hard to justify that to the church I'm affiliated with. Some churches may see those as evil and not having Christian family values.
I don't think it's anyone's business but your own and your spouse's, whether you have children or not.

Pressuring/guilting someone into having a child is stepping over a boundary, not only that; but if the couple truly does not want a child, what sort of parent would they be? Good grief, every child should be WANTED......a child's that brought into existance to escape the condemnation of a bunch of nosy people? That's no way to start out in life.

Hard to believe some people think it's their place to comment..... JMHO
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Unread 10-23-2009, 09:49 PM
 
3,735 posts, read 1,844,258 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marks View Post
A Christian couple by all means should desire and work toward having as many children as God blesses them with. For a child of God not to desire children is wrong
Perhaps while some are so busy and overwhelmed with having as many children as possible, other people who do not have the same type of constraints have more time to go out into the world and do things to help some of the children in this world who need it. They are being fruitful and other ways.

I think having children is wonderful. And I highly respect the demanding role of being a mother or father. However, it is not for everyone.

Be fruitful and multiply. I am fruitful and I am multiplying. I may not be multiplying children in this world, but I am striving to multiplying LOVE in this world.

All of God's children have a purpose.

Don't be so quick to say that your path is the only path and whoever doesn't follow is "wrong! ".

Not all people are given the desire to have children, Mark.
And there is perhaps a reason for that.

One extreme example?
Think of Mother Theresa.
Look at how fruitful she was.
Look at how SHE multiplied.

Peace to you, Mark.
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Unread 10-23-2009, 10:18 PM
 
7 posts, read 5,839 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by West of Encino View Post
It seems like most of the people who never wants to have children are not Christians, but atheist or agnostics. I really can't see myself with a non-Christian or with a person who wants kids.

By not having kids, it's hard to justify that to the church I'm affiliated with. Some churches may see those as evil and not having Christian family values.

Not at all, you should be able to make that decision yourself, you are a big boy, right? NUNS don't have children, and if your partner wants the same then go for it!
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Unread 10-23-2009, 11:32 PM
 
Location: Seward, Alaska
2,742 posts, read 5,035,685 times
Reputation: 1838
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marks View Post
The Bible is clear God commands us to populate the earth (Genesis 1:28). Add to that the principle that the family (Dad, Mom, children - not dad and dad or mom and mom) are the nucleus of a civil, prosperous, and Godly society.

At the time that commandment was given, there were not very many humans on earth. Today, we have overwhelmingly succeeded in populating the earth. (one of the few commandments of God that man has obeyed)

I think we can slow down now...
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Unread 10-24-2009, 12:04 AM
 
3,735 posts, read 1,844,258 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BudinAk View Post
At the time that commandment was given, there were not very many humans on earth. Today, we have overwhelmingly succeeded in populating the earth. (one of the few commandments of God that man has obeyed)

I think we can slow down now...
That thought crossed my mind too...
lol.
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Unread 10-24-2009, 12:07 AM
 
Location: southern california
46,577 posts, read 40,954,508 times
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children are used as hostages by bad parents who have learned, you can get money out of grandma or your ex with ease if you got the kid.
you dont have to treat the kid well. its not required. welfare recipients get lots of money this way.
i had an early resolve not to be a father, i will not watch helplessly the bad treatment of my own children like so many fathers had been forced to do.

Last edited by Huckleberry3911948; 10-24-2009 at 12:15 AM..
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Unread 10-24-2009, 07:40 AM
 
Location: 30-40N 90-100W
13,859 posts, read 11,771,099 times
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I don't intend to have children, but I also don't intend to marry.

That being said I'm open to the possibility that something could change and I'll marry. If I marry I'm almost certainly going to have children as I'm Catholic and the faith forbids contraception. (I'm aware 85% of Catholics ignore that, but I wouldn't) Although seeing as I'm 32, and would most likely marry a woman of similar age, I might not have that many kids if I someday marry.

In most forms of Protestantism I'm aware of, and many forms of Eastern Christianity, contraception is allowed. Still I think it's generally believed that if you marry you should be "open" to having kids at some point. The creation and raising of children is a pretty important element to marriage in most societies. Still there are denominations where this is not so true. I think many Episcopalians and Congregationalists are childless married couple. I'm not even sure many or any Protestant church requires married people to have kids.

So basically from my perspective being a Christian who wants to remain childless isn't unusual. Being a Christian who wants to be married and perpetually childless does strike me as a tad odd. However even that might not be unheard of or anything. As for "family values", I'm childless but family is certainly important to me. My parents, my siblings, my nieces, and nephews. My parents have eleven grandchildren so I think they're doing okay on descendants without my input.
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Unread 10-24-2009, 07:37 PM
 
Location: South Carolina
3,587 posts, read 3,280,581 times
Reputation: 539
Quote:
Originally Posted by West of Encino View Post
It seems like most of the people who never wants to have children are not Christians, but atheist or agnostics. I really can't see myself with a non-Christian or with a person who wants kids.

By not having kids, it's hard to justify that to the church I'm affiliated with. Some churches may see those as evil and not having Christian family values.
WEll, I am Christian and I don't want kids. Honestly, thinking about having kids, puts me in a depressed mood. Kids are hard to take care of and some are just darn right selfish.

God says that children are a blessing, but honestly, I don't see children as a blessing. I have to work on that.

I know I shouldn't, but when I look at other peoples kids and I see the bad ones, I just want to run. I mean, no way.

Well, if they think that those who don't want kids are evil, then they will think that I am. I don't really want to have anything to do with kids as of right now.

I like sweet little kids, but the mean and hateful ones, just makes me want to screem. But the funny thing is I would always say, if I get married, I hope that He doesn't want children.

But you know God may change my heart towards. If God wants for me to have them, God is going to have to change my heart. Because as of right now, I don't see children as a blessing. You have to feed them, change them, carry them everywhere. So, I can buy a puppy and be happy.

More power to the ones who want them and have them, they will need it.

It's kind of strange but everyone that I know says that I would be a good mother. I just look at them and don't smile.

But honestly, if I had childen I would raise them to know God. For some reason they keep saying the main people who would raise their children up to know God, doesn't want kids. Well, I don't know that.

But hey this is just my opinion. Someone else may see children and just love ummm. I'm not that person, but I am working on it. God says to be fruitfull and to multiply, I don't know about that, I would rather buy a pretty little puppy.
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Unread 10-30-2009, 02:11 PM
 
1 posts, read 611 times
Reputation: 10
I don't think you are alone and I don't think it makes you a bad person or bad Christian to admit that you don't want children, and if anyone has ever told you so, they should take a harder look around and in their bible. Jesus did not have children, and if we are to follow his example...
Plenty and I mean plenty of people are populating the earth. Just because we view them as undesirable or lower-class citizens or heathens, a word I despise by the way, we should be more concerned with sharing the gospel with those who are already here rather than breeding little clones of ourselves for the sole purpose of "populating". Jesus died for every person on this earth, people, not just the ones born into Christian homes, sorry...
It is a personal choice whether or not to have children. God will decide that for you, maybe when you least expect it or didn't think you wanted it. People who think they can enhance God's kingdom by having as many little "blessings" as He will give them seem to be so caught up in their own piety that they forget all the other missions He commands of us. I say that to say, children ARE one of His blessings, among many, and having children you want and love and raising them up in the ways of the Lord glorifies Him greatly, but not doing so does not diminish the fact that you are one of His children and He loves you! On a side note, 100% of people who are for abortion have already been born.
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