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Old 06-11-2010, 07:23 AM
 
Location: Northern Va. from N.J.
4,433 posts, read 4,845,418 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OhioanKid View Post
This illustrates exactly why someone should be absolutely sure about their marriage! No one wants to be where your friend is, that is definitely so. She has two options: to remain single, or to remarry her former husband (unfortunately, that likely won't happen).
No this shows how screwed up the hierarchy is with some of the rules they have.
They live in their ivory towers and are completely out of touch with the people.

How you can say someone should be absolutely sure about their marriage, no one can predict the future.

There is a third option and that is to ignore the hierarchy, for they are blind in so many ways.
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Old 06-11-2010, 08:00 AM
 
Location: North Carolina
6,777 posts, read 13,499,295 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SisterKat View Post
I have a friend that is Catholic and I am not sure if she participates in communion or not but she was divorced many years ago. She left her husband when her children were quite young because he was emotionally abusive. She met and fell in love with a teacher at a Catholic school her children attended. They have been together now for quite a few years but they cannot marry because she cannot have her marriage annulled. I feel bad for them because they love each other, they cannot marry and they cannot share their lives together as a couple. As he is a teacher at a Catholic school this makes the situation even more difficult. They are both passionate about their faith and do attend church together every Sunday but they cannot truly be together. I know she has shed many a tear over this but her faith prevails.
I'm confused. Why can't she get an annulment? Are you saying she tried and was denied?
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Old 06-11-2010, 09:07 AM
 
Location: North Central Ohio, to be exact :)
360 posts, read 443,170 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ted08721 View Post
No this shows how screwed up the hierarchy is with some of the rules they have.
They live in their ivory towers and are completely out of touch with the people.

How you can say someone should be absolutely sure about their marriage, no one can predict the future.

There is a third option and that is to ignore the hierarchy, for they are blind in so many ways.
Oh, come on. Love transcends all bariers, even death. A couple truly in love would sure as the earth is round not have to divorce. When you marry, there is no individual. You are one. An annulment doesn't dissolve the marriage as a divorce does, it declares it never existed (as I know of; feel free to correct me, my memory may be wrong) because it was faulty right from the attempted getgo. A true dissolution of marriage isn't even possible, in the Church's eyes.
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Old 06-11-2010, 10:06 AM
 
Location: Vancouver, BC
823 posts, read 1,385,521 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sophialee View Post
I'm confused. Why can't she get an annulment? Are you saying she tried and was denied?
She tried quite a long time ago and was denied. The sad thing is, her children are grown, they live apart as boyfriend/girlfriend. He would also most likely lose his job as a teacher at the Catholic school if they were to marry. Her other friends and I always thought they never married because he had some kind of a commitment problem but one of us finally asked her one day to find out that was not the case.

Also, they had plans to marry and adopt as he wanted to be a Father and have a family with children. She now feels by him loving her he gave up on that dream. She tried to break-off with him two times, even though she loved him, so that he could meet and marry someone else and have a family.

Last edited by SisterKat; 06-11-2010 at 10:10 AM.. Reason: added para.
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Old 06-12-2010, 10:58 PM
 
Location: NH
232 posts, read 540,745 times
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If it was quite a long time ago, then perhaps it is time to try again, eh? If that is what she truly wants.

As far as losing his job...doubtful the Catholic school has a legal leg to stand on for justifying how a valid Church marriage is a bona-fide occupational qualification for teaching.

There's more going on here than just an annulment that didn't happen many years ago.

Last edited by Sikaranista; 06-12-2010 at 11:22 PM..
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Old 08-29-2010, 11:14 AM
 
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I agree with Ted and others. To me it seems the Catholic Church has all these rules that one is supposed to follow, but these rules can be fudged, as long as the heirarchy feels it is ok. Rules are rules are they not? If they are rules based upon the teachings of Christ himself, then they are not to EVER be fudged by man are they? Yet, the Catholic Church fudges all the time. And, from what I have seen, money certainly talks in the Catholic Church. Annulments can be bought. I was raised, baptized and confirmed in the Catholic Church. I currently attend an Episcapol Church (which seems to be Catholic without the man made rules of the heirarchy). My belief and faith in God was no stronger at the Catholic Church than it is now. I have long felt the Catholic heirarchy and rules is more about just trying to be strong oranizationally, rather than a Christ based set of rules. Strongly suggested guidelines, rather than law. At least that is the way nearly ever Catholic I know seems to interpret them in terms of how they lead their lives. Just my opinion.
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Old 08-29-2010, 06:32 PM
 
63,387 posts, read 39,647,364 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sikaranista View Post
As far as losing his job...doubtful the Catholic school has a legal leg to stand on for justifying how a valid Church marriage is a bona-fide occupational qualification for teaching.

There's more going on here than just an annulment that didn't happen many years ago.
Sorry about being a skeptic . . . but the creativity and ingenuity of the male in justifying and avoiding commitments never ceases to amaze me.
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Old 08-31-2010, 10:13 PM
 
2,557 posts, read 5,837,740 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by go phillies View Post
The short answer: No, nobody who is divorced can receive communion.
Your statement is not correct. Divorced Catholics have every right to receive Communion as long as they remain in good standing with the Church.
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Old 08-31-2010, 11:13 PM
juj
 
Location: Too far from MSG
1,657 posts, read 2,622,856 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Okiegirlfriend View Post
Your statement is not correct. Divorced Catholics have every right to receive Communion as long as they remain in good standing with the Church.
The original guy is not in good standing with God. He divorced and without getting an annulment, remarried outside the Church. To the Church he is still married to his first wife. His vows to his first wife are still valid, so he is now committing adultry with his second wife. So he is in mortal sin and therefore should not receive communion.
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Old 08-31-2010, 11:23 PM
 
621 posts, read 1,204,743 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jfkIII View Post
I was married in a Roman Catholic Church back in the 1970's and divorced in 1997. I did once love my ex-wife, was married over 20 years, and that marriage produced four great children, so annulment would never apply. She and I have both since remarried and my current wife, also originally married in a Roman Catholic Church, was also divorced after 20 years of marriage and 4 children (yes...we have 8 between us!)

According to Roman Catholic rules and regulations can I receive Holy Communion when attending mass?

Please do not post personal views and beliefs...I'm looking for offical Roman Catholic law here. Also, please post links, if possible, as I can't seem to get a straight answer.
Not sure if this will mean anything to you or not, but I know a woman who was Catholic when she got married in 1960...though she got married in a Methodist church. She said she was in love with her husband at the time, and together they had two sons. Then they got divorced after 25 years of marriage. A number of years later, she got married a second time, and then later divorced him on the grounds of domestic abuse. Then again some years after that, she got married a third time. She then decided she wanted to return to the Catholic Church. The RCC annulled her marriage to her first husband, even though they weren't married in the Catholic Church. It also annulled her second marriage, even though, once again, it did not take place in the Catholic Church. Had her current husband agreed to go through with it, the RCC was going to recognize and bless her current marriage - which took place on the county courthouse grounds and was performed by a female nondenominational pastor who was "ordained" over the internet and not affiliated with any church.

So I'm not sure why the RCC would not grant you an annulment.
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