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Unfortunately true and I had a bad reason for voting reality, in my years down here I have noticed that:
1. The whole share your business mentality is pretty much alive, if you don't share your business then you are a snob.
2. If you don't smile and say yes or no mam, they will try to point you out as an outcast.
3. They do everything with a smile down here, they will say "why hello sir" with a smile and a split second later they will say "why you better not be looking in that direction, shoot, get yo ol raggidy azz over here!", with a smile!
4. First impressions are everything, when you first meet people they will put their best foot forward, once you get to know them for a week or so, they will be as rude as they can at times, they will show their real selves. I notice up north people are just pricks day one.
What does being nice and friendly have to do with being hospitable?
I can think you are the worlds biggest jerk, not care for you at all, but I can still be hospitable to you. Think of it as being mannerly or polite, even under the most adverse circumstances.
What does being nice and friendly have to do with being hospitable?
I can think you are the worlds biggest jerk, not care for you at all, but I can still be hospitable to you. Think of it as being mannerly or polite, even under the most adverse circumstances.
i understand where you're coming from but understand that a lot of us from elsewhere think that the above behavior is what makes a lot of ppl in/from the south, "fake."
Hospitality can't be faked. The problem is not that southerners aren't hospitable, it's that too many people don't understand the difference between hospitality and friendliness. They aren't the same and it's beyond me to understand why so many get the two things confused.
The wait staff at your favorite restaurant are probably hospitable, but I doubt you think they sincerely want to be your friend.
I can see how some may find the Southern kindness to be fake. Yes some may talk behind your back and gossip. But hospitality and courtesy are different than just kindness. The hospitality and courtesy down here is genuine. Now, on the flip side, I(and I'm sure others from down here), find that SOME(not all) of our Northern transplant neighbors, TRY to display a level of toughness, hardness and bravado, and use it as a front to show us how "tough" and "rough" there former place of residence was up North. I'm sure some really did have it rough up there, but for ALOT of them, it seems false. There seems to be this never-ending battle of who's harder than who, and it seems that alot of them(meaning Northern transplants) seem to fake the funk. In other words, some talk a big game, but there bark is louder than there bite. I find this display of toughness equally as fake as the fake Southern hospitality displayed by the Southerners. REMEMBER, just because you act real, doesn't mean you ARE real. Cussing people out, and always talking rudely to people, doesn't automatically validate your "Honesty" and "realness", and people often mistake Northern RUDENESS, for honesty, when in REALITY it's just a front that SOME(not all), put on. It's an act, it's a show, it's a play. Alot of people say this: "Hey the only reason why us people from up North act like they don't like you, is because we're brutally honest, and "REAL". You know you can be REAL, and HONEST, without acting like a complete tool. Just saying.
Hospitality can't be faked. The problem is not that southerners aren't hospitable, it's that too many people don't understand the difference between hospitality and friendliness. They aren't the same and it's beyond me to understand why so many get the two things confused.
The wait staff at your favorite restaurant are probably hospitable, but I doubt you think they sincerely want to be your friend.
I think that the issue with many people is why receive me in a friendly welcoming manner if you don't genuinely feel that way about me. If you can't stand me why welcome me?
I think that the issue with many people is why receive me in a friendly welcoming manner if you don't genuinely feel that way about me. If you can't stand me why welcome me?
Okay, West you're being ridiculous here. What if I'm meeting you for the first time (at work), would you want me to be like "Hi, how's it going?" or would you want me to be like, "I DON'T KNOW YOU AND I REALLY DON'T WANT TO KNOW YOU, YOU PIG FACED B*TCH!" (because I could be thinking that initianally) ... Let's be real West, you wouldn't want to start like that with anyone.
All regions have some type of initial generosity but they put their regional spin on it. Meeting someone for the first time doesn't make one friends for life because friendship is a longer process. People complaining about Southern hospitality are probably the same people who'd go thought he had a real shot at the female bartender because she smiled at you. I'm not fake I'd rather not have a tumultuous first impression (I'm about 70/30 with that).
Okay, West you're being ridiculous here. What if I'm meeting you for the first time (at work), would you want me to be like "Hi, how's it going?" or would you want me to be like, "I DON'T KNOW YOU AND I REALLY DON'T WANT TO KNOW YOU, YOU PIG FACED B*TCH!" (because I could be thinking that initianally) ... Let's be real West, you wouldn't want to start like that with anyone.
All regions have some type of initial generosity but they put their regional spin on it. Meeting someone for the first time doesn't make one friends for life because friendship is a longer process. People complaining about Southern hospitality are probably the same people who'd go thought he had a real shot at the female bartender because she smiled at you. I'm not fake I'd rather not have a tumultuous first impression (I'm about 70/30 with that).
That's exactly what I was talking about in my previous post. You don't have to be a jerk, to be REAL or HONEST. And that's what I'm sensing from people when they act a certain jerkish ways upon 1st contact, and try to pass it off as "Just keepin it real". Sometimes, they're just putting up a front, and are actually acting fake themselves. Trying to front as being hard.
Okay, West you're being ridiculous here. What if I'm meeting you for the first time (at work), would you want me to be like "Hi, how's it going?" or would you want me to be like, "I DON'T KNOW YOU AND I REALLY DON'T WANT TO KNOW YOU, YOU PIG FACED B*TCH!" (because I could be thinking that initianally) ... Let's be real West, you wouldn't want to start like that with anyone.
All regions have some type of initial generosity but they put their regional spin on it. Meeting someone for the first time doesn't make one friends for life because friendship is a longer process. People complaining about Southern hospitality are probably the same people who'd go thought he had a real shot at the female bartender because she smiled at you. I'm not fake I'd rather not have a tumultuous first impression (I'm about 70/30 with that).
You're taking out of what I said out of proportion and then you're exaggerating.
Anyone who greets someone with "I DON'T KNOW YOU AND I REALLY DON'T WANT TO KNOW YOU, YOU PIG FACED B*TCH!" is an *******.
If I'm approached by someone that I don't know, why should I be overly friendly and welcoming toward them? What's wrong with a simple "Hey, nice to meet you." ? That doesn't mean that I wouldn't be interested in getting to know them and all.
If I don't like someone, why pretend like I care about them being there and act as if I want them to enjoy themselves? I couldn't care less and more than likely they already know how I feel.
If something needs to be said and it's on the mind of everyone in the room, why not say it? Why awkwardly sit around looking at everyone hoping no one notices?
If you need to know something why sugarcoat it to be "respectful"? Respectful of what?
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I'm not going to make a rude first impression, but I'm not going to be in character either.
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