I would second the idea of looking at Madison, Wisconsin. It is extremely gay-friendly, and the area has on occasion been referred to by conservatives as "The People's Republic of Dane County."
The rest of Wisconsin, save Milwaukee, has recently taken a sharp turn to the extreme-right. Go into some of the rural areas or small towns, and you are in Scaryland.
Wisconsin is possibly the most politically polarized state in the country. People are either to the Left or to the Right, and everyone has an opinion about the Governor and the Legislature. There is no middle ground. The bitter divide has driven wedges between members of families and between friends. People's personal property (cars, yards, homes, etc.) have been vandalized because they had the "wrong" political sign/bumper sticker/etc. on display.
You would be fine in Madison or its suburbs, though. It's a beautiful area, and I think you'd like it if you can stand the cold winters, the snow, and the early sunset (4:30 pm) in the winter.
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