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Old 02-11-2019, 09:09 AM
 
5,375 posts, read 5,790,077 times
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I am planning my last and final move in two years. I will be a 50 year old gay Black male who loves visual and performing arts and living a active lifestyle.

St. Louis appeals to me due to the charming neighborhoods, useful transit, close proximity to family and an established social network. The quality of life is excellent due to the cost of living. Draw back is the lack of outdoor recreation in the city, no sunshine during the winter and lack of a decent airport to travel out of town. It is the absolute smallest msa I am comfortable living in.

Dallas appeals to me due to what I see as young and prosperous energy. Its large enough to offer more than what I need for day to day life and seems like a place where I could be active most of the year. There shouldn't be a problem establishing a good social network due to the transient nature of the area. Cost of living seems fair. No longer the cheapest but still not bad for that type of area. It doesn't seem to have the charming neighborhoods but there are options for urban living. I am not a fan of conservative politics but Dallas never seemed conservative to me.

San Diego seems to be a happy place. I could visually see myself jogging or biking along the ocean in the middle of December. I am sure the area has a lot to offer due to its size. My only experience there is in the Airport, Pendry hotel and walking around downtown. I know nothing else about this place except it felt like a great place to live. I've read its very expensive for housing and taxes but lower on food. I don't have any friends or family in that area so that may be a drawback.

Given what I am looking for, I am looking for input from others who are familiar with the cities listed and how they compare. I am open to other options based upon my criteria. I don't care about a bar scene nor crime stats. I do care about the usefulness of mass transit, access to walkable neighborhoods, outdoor active living, performing arts and how easy it will be to dig into a social network at age 50.
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Old 02-11-2019, 09:25 AM
 
Location: East Coast
332 posts, read 196,020 times
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Go where you think you think you’ll be happiest is my advice, you’ll be fine socially and probably everything else. You had me at “jogging by the ocean” I wouldn’t live in places that advertise “low cost of living”. Out of these I’d pick San Diego but I’d also look at other places. Good luck be happy!
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Old 02-11-2019, 09:32 AM
 
5,375 posts, read 5,790,077 times
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Originally Posted by Koji7 View Post
Go where you think you think you’ll be happiest is my advice, you’ll be fine socially and probably everything else. You had me at “jogging by the ocean” I wouldn’t live in places that advertise “low cost of living”. Out of these I’d pick San Diego but I’d also look at other places. Good luck be happy!
Thank you. The cost of living is a major quality of life issue but you get what you pay for in most places. I am pretty success oriented and want to live among like minds. Most of the time, the lower cost of living places are full of people with a poverty driven mindset or lack of opportunity. I am not with that.
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Old 02-11-2019, 02:10 PM
 
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I would rule out STL. I think you'd be sacrificing a lot there. Dallas is larger and provides more options for what you're looking for and is affordable. SD provides way more, but at the higher price.

Dallas is a good option. You'd have more spending money to do the things you love. You'd have the money to eat out and explore more restaurants. You mention STL having a subpar airport, so sounds like travel is important to you. Dallas has the best airport of the three options and the money you save living in Dallas would let you travel to more locations worldwide. Being a gay black male in Dallas should not be a problem. TX is conservative, but Dallas in the city is not. Public transit if you live in the urban areas isn't bad especially if you're in downtown or one of the surrounding urban neighborhoods with light rail or streetcar service.

SD will provide the best life for outdoor living. You definitely can jog or bike along the beach in December and every other month of the year. Housing can be very expensive. The downtown area has a lot of new development like Dallas and some light rail lines. Hillcrest is the gayborhood, and that has spread into North Park as well. The major downfall of SD I see for you is that, I don't mean to call out your age whatsoever, but SD is a very young city. Not all over, obviously, as many people have families. But a lot of the mentality and vibe in SD is very into being young and surfing and living the beach bum lifestyle and drinking on outdoor patios looking over the beach. I'm sure Dallas has these locations also, I just can't fully comment. But places like Ocean Beach and Pacific Beach are centers of nightlife and dining, but they're very much for the young surfer vibe. Hillcrest is a lot of young gays. North Park is a little more hipster. If you can afford La Jolla, I think you'd be very happy there, but it's VERY expensive there.

I think you need to weigh the pluses and minuses between Dallas and SD. SD attracts young people looking for the beach lifestyle from all over the country. That will lead to a younger vibe and lifestyle probably. It's the far better outdoorsy city with beaches and hiking everywhere you look. But it's more expensive than Dallas and the airport is also not that great. Also, I can't comment entirely, but I'd sorta assume the performing arts scene is hit or miss in SD. While it's a young city with art and culture everywhere you look, I'd guess some of the bigger names and events might skip SD and go to LA. But with that, you can easily drive or take a train from SD to LA. In Dallas, you might get some of the bigger events and shows coming through, and you'll have more money to travel. But your day-to-day life might be a little less adventurous.

Last edited by jessemh431; 02-11-2019 at 02:36 PM..
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Old 02-11-2019, 03:25 PM
 
5,375 posts, read 5,790,077 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jessemh431 View Post
I would rule out STL. I think you'd be sacrificing a lot there. Dallas is larger and provides more options for what you're looking for and is affordable. SD provides way more, but at the higher price.

Dallas is a good option. You'd have more spending money to do the things you love. You'd have the money to eat out and explore more restaurants. You mention STL having a subpar airport, so sounds like travel is important to you. Dallas has the best airport of the three options and the money you save living in Dallas would let you travel to more locations worldwide. Being a gay black male in Dallas should not be a problem. TX is conservative, but Dallas in the city is not. Public transit if you live in the urban areas isn't bad especially if you're in downtown or one of the surrounding urban neighborhoods with light rail or streetcar service.

SD will provide the best life for outdoor living. You definitely can jog or bike along the beach in December and every other month of the year. Housing can be very expensive. The downtown area has a lot of new development like Dallas and some light rail lines. Hillcrest is the gayborhood, and that has spread into North Park as well. The major downfall of SD I see for you is that, I don't mean to call out your age whatsoever, but SD is a very young city. Not all over, obviously, as many people have families. But a lot of the mentality and vibe in SD is very into being young and surfing and living the beach bum lifestyle and drinking on outdoor patios looking over the beach. I'm sure Dallas has these locations also, I just can't fully comment. But places like Ocean Beach and Pacific Beach are centers of nightlife and dining, but they're very much for the young surfer vibe. Hillcrest is a lot of young gays. North Park is a little more hipster. If you can afford La Jolla, I think you'd be very happy there, but it's VERY expensive there.

I think you need to weigh the pluses and minuses between Dallas and SD. SD attracts young people looking for the beach lifestyle from all over the country. That will lead to a younger vibe and lifestyle probably. It's the far better outdoorsy city with beaches and hiking everywhere you look. But it's more expensive than Dallas and the airport is also not that great. Also, I can't comment entirely, but I'd sorta assume the performing arts scene is hit or miss in SD. While it's a young city with art and culture everywhere you look, I'd guess some of the bigger names and events might skip SD and go to LA. But with that, you can easily drive or take a train from SD to LA. In Dallas, you might get some of the bigger events and shows coming through, and you'll have more money to travel. But your day-to-day life might be a little less adventurous.

Thanks for the information on Dallas and San Diego. My biggest concern of Dallas is the tax on real-estate. How high is it?
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Old 02-11-2019, 03:39 PM
 
5,375 posts, read 5,790,077 times
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On paper Atlanta looks good. It has a very good arts community. Easy access to outdoor recreation. A useful HRT system from what I see. Some sunshine during the winter without the constant rain, snow or ice. Some okay urban living options but seems to be mostly new high rises. Lush greenery and lots to do. Cost of living seems to be very doable. The airport is one of the busiest if not the busiest in the world. Not too far from friends and family. On the negative side, I keep hearing negative things about the people and pretentious attitudes. I have not gotten the livability vibe that I have experienced in other cities being considered. Maybe I need to revisit this option.
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Old 02-11-2019, 03:40 PM
 
6,118 posts, read 13,609,450 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mjtinmemphis View Post
Thanks for the information on Dallas and San Diego. My biggest concern of Dallas is the tax on real-estate. How high is it?
Looks like average is 2.173% in Dallas and San Diego is 0.781%. Not sure how accurate this is
https://smartasset.com/taxes/texas-p...tor#6TOaioGpNg
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Old 02-11-2019, 03:49 PM
 
5,375 posts, read 5,790,077 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jessemh431 View Post
Looks like average is 2.173% in Dallas and San Diego is 0.781%. Not sure how accurate this is
https://smartasset.com/taxes/texas-p...tor#6TOaioGpNg
Thanks
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Old 02-11-2019, 04:07 PM
 
Location: Huntington Beach, CA
5,801 posts, read 10,799,266 times
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I lived inthe Saint Louis Area for two years and absolutely hated it. Lack of diversity. Lots of very angry people, and crappy weather, but super cheap.

Dallas is very slow paced, and very hot in the summer. I would consider Austin, which many of my old New York and California friends really seem to love.

San Diego's downfall is cost of living (we live about an hour north, but our winter electric and gas bill has only been $35 a month, and it's been a cold winter so far.)
But Coastal Southern California offers the most recreational and cultural amenities. Almost year round sunshine and if you want "winter" its usually an 1.5 hour drive into the mountains. Easy access to the beaches, deserts, forests, Mountains....
Most people are non judgemental, won't push their religious views on you, and will leave you alone. On the negative side, there is a very vocal group of Neo-Nazis in MAGA hats, if you stay away from their rallies, you won't even notice them.
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Old 02-11-2019, 04:34 PM
 
5,375 posts, read 5,790,077 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DinsdalePirahna View Post
I lived inthe Saint Louis Area for two years and absolutely hated it. Lack of diversity. Lots of very angry people, and crappy weather, but super cheap.

Dallas is very slow paced, and very hot in the summer. I would consider Austin, which many of my old New York and California friends really seem to love.

San Diego's downfall is cost of living (we live about an hour north, but our winter electric and gas bill has only been $35 a month, and it's been a cold winter so far.)
But Coastal Southern California offers the most recreational and cultural amenities. Almost year round sunshine and if you want "winter" its usually an 1.5 hour drive into the mountains. Easy access to the beaches, deserts, forests, Mountains....
Most people are non judgemental, won't push their religious views on you, and will leave you alone. On the negative side, there is a very vocal group of Neo-Nazis in MAGA hats, if you stay away from their rallies, you won't even notice them.
Thanks for sharing your opinion.

I am definitely concerned about the racial climate in any place I live. I understand there is racism and prejudice everywhere. I refuse to live in a place where I have to think about running into that type of dysfunctional foolery. If there is a hint of Neo Nazi in MAGA hats, San Diego is a no go!!! isn't that only in areas of north San Diego County? This isn't the first time hearing or reading about that.

Given my criteria, Austin is nice but a no go because it doesn't appeal to me. If I was in a different demographic or a different point in life journey, I would consider a place like Austin. Dallas doesn't seem slow. I live in St. Louis and love it.

I guess we are looking at things through different lenses. That's ok.

Last edited by mjtinmemphis; 02-11-2019 at 04:43 PM..
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