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I'm 19 years old and I currently live in California. I graduated high school last year, and got my diploma. I started my first year of community college and finished 1 year but suddenly I feel it's time that I move out of my parents house.
I've saved $5,000 dollars as preparation. I bought a truck in full to get me where I'm going. I've tested myself by paying my own phone bill for 2 years and I feel somewhat prepared to kick it up a notch and finally feel what it's like to live on my own. I've always been self dependent since freshmen year of high school--I never had the opportunity to be "spoiled" like feeling most of my friends parents treated their kids. I personally was jealous how they got all the new toys and awesome gadgets and top-line phones/clothes. Since my parents wouldn't give me these things I was always concerned by how much things cost--and if I really needed it. If my parents wouldn't buy it, I was the one who had to save and buy it myself. So I was the one who never had a playstation 3, xbox 360, new clothes, or top rated cell phones. There's a feeling inside me saying my money has a different purpose--survival.
So all I wish to ask is for some advice. I'm ready to be self dependent. I want to work at a fast food restaurant to get me started. I want to start a new life a better life where I don't have to see my friends getting spoiled. I want to move far away from California as I can and be smart about it. I want to post Facebook statuses how well I'm doing without my parents, how well life is on your own. I want to move to Wilmington, NC.
I want to live temporarily in Wilmington, NC where I will start my new life. While in Wilmington I plan on finding an apartment where a credit check won't be necessary or dependent. I have no credit. After I find my apartment for $700-$800 per month--I can go to Cape Fear community college and finish up my general education and engineering prep classes--and transfer out of state (costs more I know) or go to Chapel Hill. (I am studying to become a computer engineer because I love computers and I've always loved engineering). In the mean time I will be receiving around $200.00 per month from website revenue. That money could help pay for my college books and or food. Also while finding this apartment I need to find a job. I'll apply to all the local stores, fast food places, and anywhere I would have a potential job at. I know Wilmington is more of a professional occupational area such as nursing and business jobs--but like I said this is just a place where I want to go to college at and live my new life, being self dependent. I plan on finding a computer engineering job somewhere else. Unless I start an entrepreneurship of my own.
Either way no matter where I go--a fast food job would be a necessity. So I decided I want to work hard in Wilmington and survive and get my college prep done there. Wilmington is a place where I would be forced to work hard. A place where things aren't given to me. A place where I will experience the true meaning of living on your own, how hard it will be, how stressful it will be, I need to experience this if I ever want to be a strong boyfriend/husband in the future.
So in short, I am asking for your personal advice. Please don't tell me to stay living with my parents, to me that's the "easy life" and I'm moving out no matter what. I want to adventure my life, and use these experiences to be the best man for my future wife. I don't want to be in my parents house for my whole college career, missing life experiences or experiencing them at a late age. None of my friends know how to live on their own, so I want to continue being self dependent and go all the way, just like Rocky does. (It's a movie I know it's fake--the inspiration is real)
So please if you have any helpful advice for my move, please share your advice with me. Please enlighten me and tell me your experiences of moving out for the first time and how you handled the real world.
while i admire the spirit of your youth i think you have some major obstacles.
$5000 might SEEM like a lot of money to have saved but darlin - it ain't!
Paying a phone bill isn't the same as surviving
fast food pays minimum wage. You will not be able to afford rent payment of 700-800/ month on that. i dont think you could afford rent of $500 on that. plus food, gas, electric, insurance, clothes, and other incidentals.
min wage: 7.25/ hour. thats $290/ week BEFORE taxes. so cut off (roughly) a third of it. so now youre left with, lets say $200 a week. plus the $200/month form some website - thats $1000 a month. might seem like a lot but it will go faster than you can imagine. most apartments will follow the 1/3 rule for your income to rent ration. that means, for most complexes, you will have to make 3X what the rent is. Assuming rent is $500, you would have to make $1500/month just to qualify. that doesnt include any deposits for rent or utility deposits.
And we havent even touched tuition, books and lab fees for school.
I promise I'm not a debbie downer but this is a bad BAD idea for you right now. jobs are scarce. even fast food. living expenses are high. Now, if you had a friend here who you could bum off of for awhile and sleep on their couch or something, maybe it might not be so bad, but that doesnt sound like thats the case.
i would stay put for the time being. get your education where you are. get a job, save up some real money, network here for a real job... THEN move.
while i admire the spirit of your youth i think you have some major obstacles.
$5000 might SEEM like a lot of money to have saved but darlin - it ain't!
Paying a phone bill isn't the same as surviving
fast food pays minimum wage. You will not be able to afford rent payment of 700-800/ month on that. i dont think you could afford rent of $500 on that. plus food, gas, electric, insurance, clothes, and other incidentals.
min wage: 7.25/ hour. thats $290/ week BEFORE taxes. so cut off (roughly) a third of it. so now youre left with, lets say $200 a week. plus the $200/month form some website - thats $1000 a month. might seem like a lot but it will go faster than you can imagine. most apartments will follow the 1/3 rule for your income to rent ration. that means, for most complexes, you will have to make 3X what the rent is. Assuming rent is $500, you would have to make $1500/month just to qualify. that doesnt include any deposits for rent or utility deposits.
And we havent even touched tuition, books and lab fees for school.
I promise I'm not a debbie downer but this is a bad BAD idea for you right now. jobs are scarce. even fast food. living expenses are high. Now, if you had a friend here who you could bum off of for awhile and sleep on their couch or something, maybe it might not be so bad, but that doesnt sound like thats the case.
i would stay put for the time being. get your education where you are. get a job, save up some real money, network here for a real job... THEN move.
What if instead of those apartments that check credit, I find one that doesn't take credit and we could work something out? For tuition and books I was planning on using financial aid + financial aid grant money.
I do have a friend down there but I don't know if he is ready to move into an apartment with me. I'd really prefer a dorm but there's no community colleges with dorms. The out of state tuition doesn't bother me even if it costs a bit more, when I transfer in NC the tuition will be in-state. There's lots of things I could do such as finishing my last year at University of California San Diego so my bachelors says San Diego. Then I could stay there for two years to get my masters but it all depends how things go you know?
The thing I wanted to do though was move out and at least make it. The cheapest apartment I saw in Wilmington was $459 or so. Still do you really believe I won't be able to make it? I saw a petco job and it was paying $8.00 per hour and covered medical. There's a few other retail jobs too that cover medical and I'm sure it's real competition to get in there. Still I want to risk it and try. Do you think I'll still fail? :\
Also sure the military is right for anyone. I however don't want to enter the military as a enlisted man. I'd rather enter in as an officer so I don't get used & abused. I'd want to be a fighter pilot since that requires an engineering major and who doesn't want to fly? That was my second job choice if I want to "accelerate your(my) life." Still my main career is I want to be a computer engineer.
Still though is there any private owners in Wilmington that I could rent from if I don't meet the income quota?
What if instead of those apartments that check credit, I find one that doesn't take credit and we could work something out? For tuition and books I was planning on using financial aid + financial aid grant money.
The thing I wanted to do though was move out and at least make it. The cheapest apartment I saw in Wilmington was $459 or so. Still do you really believe I won't be able to make it? I saw a petco job and it was paying $8.00 per hour and covered medical. There's a few other retail jobs too that cover medical and I'm sure it's real competition to get in there. Still I want to risk it and try. Do you think I'll still fail? :\
Still though is there any private owners in Wilmington that I could rent from if I don't meet the income quota?
i really think you'd be fighting a HUGE uphill battle. yes, there are private landlords but even then... in the price range that you MIGHT (huge emphasis there) be able to afford.... I'm just not seeing it pan out well.
the stress of working a FULL TIME job and school and trying to get by... all with NO help from family, it would really be tough. and you have to buy food somewhere in there, you know?
Now, if you could find a simple room for rent that covered utilities and was around $300/ month, it might increase the odds of you being successful. OR finding a group of UNCW students looking for a roomate where your share would be around the same ($300 or so/month) then it might be more feasible.
Not to mention all of the local college kids who want the same job as you. competition is tough right now.
what i would hate to see you do (and what i see happening) is you moving here, using all your savings exhausting yourself trying to get by and possibly forsaking school because you dont have the time/energy/or money, and having to go home tail tucked between your legs or (perhaps worse) being stuck in wilmington just barely scraping by. And without the education, or a special trade, scraping by might be the best that could happen.
I agree you should look for a roommate. If you're dead set on moving here, chances are it won't be possible to live alone off the bat. I'm 24 and still at home with a steady job. It's just too expensive. Good luck though.
i really think you'd be fighting a HUGE uphill battle. yes, there are private landlords but even then... in the price range that you MIGHT (huge emphasis there) be able to afford.... I'm just not seeing it pan out well.
the stress of working a FULL TIME job and school and trying to get by... all with NO help from family, it would really be tough. and you have to buy food somewhere in there, you know?
Now, if you could find a simple room for rent that covered utilities and was around $300/ month, it might increase the odds of you being successful. OR finding a group of UNCW students looking for a roomate where your share would be around the same ($300 or so/month) then it might be more feasible.
Not to mention all of the local college kids who want the same job as you. competition is tough right now.
what i would hate to see you do (and what i see happening) is you moving here, using all your savings exhausting yourself trying to get by and possibly forsaking school because you dont have the time/energy/or money, and having to go home tail tucked between your legs or (perhaps worse) being stuck in wilmington just barely scraping by. And without the education, or a special trade, scraping by might be the best that could happen.
Well I suppose your right. What would you say if I got a room mate or two in a $600/month apartment where in order to quality for the apartment you need: "Individual applicants must gross 2.5 to 2.75X the monthly rent"
But if I get a room mate we could so make that. We'd just need 2 beds and that would only be $600/month + that 2.5x600 and we can make it + have money left over you think for food/necessities? It'd be another college student and we could make it I think.
What do you think? I really don't want to be scraping it. :\ I know I can find another student to help me and I can help him/her.
Quote:
Originally Posted by box_of_zip_disks
If you're really set on studying computer engineering you'd be doing yourself a huge disservice by leaving the UC system.
I just hate California now tho. I want out and I don't really care if I don't get a prestigious degree as I would in California. I can always go back and finish my masters in UC.
Well I suppose your right. What would you say if I got a room mate or two in a $600/month apartment where in order to quality for the apartment you need: "Individual applicants must gross 2.5 to 2.75X the monthly rent"
But if I get a room mate we could so make that. We'd just need 2 beds and that would only be $600/month + that 2.5x600 and we can make it + have money left over you think for food/necessities? It'd be another college student and we could make it I think.
What do you think? I really don't want to be scraping it. :\ I know I can find another student to help me and I can help him/her.
I just hate California now tho. I want out and I don't really care if I don't get a prestigious degree as I would in California. I can always go back and finish my masters in UC.
you could also tough it out and move here after you have your degree.
It's been so long since i lived in an apartment I can only speak on my 21 year old sister (in greenville) and her situation regarding roommate/ money.
they each had to make the minimum to rent there. reason being, if one roommate ditches, the other can still (theoretically, at least) afford to stay there- or at least make it till they find another roommate or the lease is expired or whatever.
not to mention... you still have to find a job. And it is TOUGH. even low paying jobs have a lot of competition. not only from high school/ college age kids, but adults who have been laid off and are trying to make ends meet and support their family.
I'm telling you the same thing I would tell my own kids. I won't say do it or dont do it - but you need to THOROUGHLY analyze EVERYTHING before packing your bags.
if you DO decide to do it, i would give your folks enough money to cover return airfare home (if you cant make it here). this way, you dont have it, so you cant spend it, and when you call and say i need to come home, youre not asking them for money- since they are just holding YOUR money. That might save *some* embarrassment should you need to return to CA.
you could also tough it out and move here after you have your degree.
It's been so long since i lived in an apartment I can only speak on my 21 year old sister (in greenville) and her situation regarding roommate/ money.
they each had to make the minimum to rent there. reason being, if one roommate ditches, the other can still (theoretically, at least) afford to stay there- or at least make it till they find another roommate or the lease is expired or whatever.
not to mention... you still have to find a job. And it is TOUGH. even low paying jobs have a lot of competition. not only from high school/ college age kids, but adults who have been laid off and are trying to make ends meet and support their family.
I'm telling you the same thing I would tell my own kids. I won't say do it or dont do it - but you need to THOROUGHLY analyze EVERYTHING before packing your bags.
if you DO decide to do it, i would give your folks enough money to cover return airfare home (if you cant make it here). this way, you dont have it, so you cant spend it, and when you call and say i need to come home, youre not asking them for money- since they are just holding YOUR money. That might save *some* embarrassment should you need to return to CA.
Thank you sooooo much for the advice. I will listen to you and thoroughly analyze everything that I can while I'm still here. The only worry I have now is if I can get a retail job and team up with a room mate. I can find a room mate on craigslist and I feel really dedicated to helping out and making this work.
I won't be able to do this alone so I will need a room mate or two. I worry with all this competition in the air I hope I can get a job at mc donalds or some fast food/retail place. If I can't get a job there I'm going to have to figure out a way to make money at least $300 +- $500 a month to pitch in for rent and other necessities.
I'm trying to figure out right now how many hours I can work and if I'm going to need a second job to get more income to pay for other supplies. This won't be easy but hard work always pays off right? I'm not a quitter and I'll keep going I just hope I can make this work.
I'm actually scared of this. My only other weakness was beautiful women... I feel like moving out of the house is feeling like a weakness and I need to over come it. At least when all this is done and said and all this hard work pays off--I'll have a story to tell my kids (if I ever have any). If I don't have any kids I can brag to my wife all the things I did when I was younger and how that lead up to our relationship, and how everything I did was just to make her happy.
In all honesty... I really love computers and I enjoy being knowledgeable about them since they are the future. I love engineering it's what my father does and I don't know if he inspired me to like it or not or if it came in my blood. I love engineering but I may just turn my love for computers as a hobby. I might become a doctor instead because computers are the future but people are always going to need help. If I move to North Carolina I don't see many computer engineering jobs. Doctors & Surgeons are always in need of employment. I remember being a kid and telling my mom I wanted to be a flight surgeon because I loved the fighter jets and because blood never bothered me. I was a kid though. (I still love fighter jets! Who doesn't?)
I'm really considering being a professional doctor though. Engineering is fun and sure it's got good pay but honestly I'd rather have it as a hobby. Being a fighter pilot in the military would be fun too but I couldn't handle being away for so long from my spouse. If I'm a doctor I can come home every night to my wife, and even play doctor for her!
Do you think I'm crazy for wanting to pursue this? Becoming a doctor is hard work but so is becoming a computer engineer. I don't feel hurt or damaged in anyway changing occupations. Is that crazy of me, or foolish?
Thanks a lot for supporting me too, giving me great advice. You're making me feel less afraid of this and I feel like I can make it even if I fail there's a way out of this.
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