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Old 11-20-2011, 11:10 AM
 
6,809 posts, read 10,468,640 times
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I don't think bullying is on the rise. I think the bar for what is considered bullying has lowered, contributing to the perceived "rise". Kids are not meaner now than they were before, generally speaking.
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Old 11-20-2011, 11:25 AM
 
26,160 posts, read 48,867,893 times
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Okay, we're having a good GENERAL discussion, but what about the OP's question? What's going on in D20?

Anything there worth mentioning / know about?

Here's a list of their Security staffers who seem to be on site at most high schools and/or middle schools.

Here's what I get when searching their site with the word BULLYING.
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Old 11-20-2011, 04:06 PM
SYS
 
339 posts, read 1,169,670 times
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I just dealt with a bullying incident involving my 12-year old son. It was a minor but racial, twice by the same kid a year apart between the incidents. I wasn't alarmed, but I decided to let the school administrators know that I'm keeping a record of what's going on, just in case the bully decides to become serial. Interestingly, they knew who the bully in question was even before I had a chance to name him. My boy was interviewed, and I don't know what action they took of the bully, but my boy hasn't had any unpleasant incidents since.
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Old 11-22-2011, 10:13 AM
 
Location: Phoenix, AZ
20,318 posts, read 14,538,167 times
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Wee bit of advice for anyone with a child who is facing this problem (I know Mike, trying not to wander all over the world with the thread...but this could be helpful?)

My oldest had confidence problems which lead to persistent bullying. I got both sons in a family-oriented martial arts program. (Not one of the hardcore, competition-driven types.) He did not start to become more physically violent, but rather learned confidence in himself. If truly in danger, he understands the difference between defense and retaliation. It really just did so much for him. I recommend it to anyone whose child is dealing with these issues, even if they're not the victim. A good martial arts program also teaches great values. Just my 2 cents.
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Old 11-22-2011, 10:37 AM
 
Location: 80904 West siiiiiide!
2,957 posts, read 8,359,183 times
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My daughter had the same issue. I made her feel better by driving her around and pointing out the people that bullied me in high school. All of them were working at McDonalds or lived in a trailer park with 6 children. Since then, she's learned to laugh at them and has even told a few of them that when she's 20, she'll be enrolled in AFROTC, well on her way to a rewarding military career, while they'll most likely be stuck in some dead end job, living in poverty.

That, and she knows I wont get mad if she's justified in knocking someone's teeth out.
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Old 11-22-2011, 11:07 AM
 
Location: Colorado Springs, CO
598 posts, read 1,543,352 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ryanek9freak View Post
My daughter had the same issue. I made her feel better by driving her around and pointing out the people that bullied me in high school. All of them were working at McDonalds or lived in a trailer park with 6 children. Since then, she's learned to laugh at them and has even told a few of them that when she's 20, she'll be enrolled in AFROTC, well on her way to a rewarding military career, while they'll most likely be stuck in some dead end job, living in poverty.

That, and she knows I wont get mad if she's justified in knocking someone's teeth out.
Most excellent...well done!
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Old 11-27-2011, 09:52 PM
 
3 posts, read 5,860 times
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Ok, I want to say that appreciate the lively discussion going on here, however, I really just wanted to connect with parents in D20 who have dealt with bullying. My son has special needs and they aren't obvious. He has been the victim of systemic bullying since the first week of school. I have done all the right things and have some great professionals who are giving me good advice on how to handle the situation. I merely wanted to see if other parents were having similar experiences.
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Old 11-29-2011, 07:25 AM
 
3,490 posts, read 6,082,969 times
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I wish the parents in all districts cared as much as the ones on this thread.

I graduated HS in 2002, and it was almost the end of dealing with bullies for me. After that the number of people committing it was significantly fewer. I can think of about 3 in the following years, 1 of which lasted more than two months. None of those people would think of themselves as bullies, but they were. At that point I still didn't know how to stand up for myself.

In High school I did have one thing that helped dramatically. I got into weight lifting, and learned how to go toe to toe with the bully. I got suspended, since the school policy was that if you throw a punch (even if you just took 10), you are guilty and must be suspended. Self defense is NOT allowed in any situation. Now they were creative, they would push incidents under the rug, then catch the bully for something else because they wanted to avoid suspending good kids. I wasn't a particularly good kid, but I did help the school. It only took a few of us standing up to the bully. Win, lose, or draw. The bully would get suspended, and after a couple he was gone for the year.

Does bullying HAVE to be physical? I don't think so. That's like saying it isn't a crime until it is assault. I don't have to endure it anymore, in either form. I don't endure it verbally because I'm confident and can get very loud. I'll use that superior intellect to retaliate on the spot. They won't get into a fight with me because I look like ex-military. The bullies are usually scared of getting a good beating.

I assume the parents of bullies are terrible people and choose not to be responsible. I can't reasonably hold them responsible, so I will demand accountability from the educational institution. To be clear: I'm not expecting the school to raise the other children. I'm expecting them to protect the innocent children in spite of the the poor parenting some kids receive.

The last bullying incident I dealt with in High School:

My wife (now) has a sister who has had some slight cognitive function challenges through out her life. She was one of the favorite victims for the schools most notorious bully. This "person" had done two years in Juvy for armed vehicular assault. (Leaning out the window of a moving vehicle to beat someone with a baseball bat) When he returned and harassed her again, I went to have a talk with him. I told him he could throw down with me, and he would the next time he harassed her. He wouldn't have to look for me, because I'd bring it to him. There were only two possible outcomes. He kicked my behind and went to serve time in Jail, or I kicked his and he went to serve time in jail. I'd take that chance, because either way he'd be locked up for years.

We never spoke again after that, and he decided to leave her alone.
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Old 12-02-2011, 07:22 PM
 
Location: Colorado Springs
310 posts, read 1,244,053 times
Reputation: 178
I was accused of bullying back in 1986, and it turns out the kid was a total tattle tale. Now my son is always being accused of bullying in ASD20 and it is simply not fair. Sure, he is a bruiser and likes to get his way, but is it my fault that other kids are scared of him? Should I really have all these parents on my case over a few black eyes etc?
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Old 12-02-2011, 08:13 PM
 
6,809 posts, read 10,468,640 times
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Sometimes the larger kids are accused of bullying when they're really not - especially if we're talking elementary school. That happened to my nephew - he was large and fast for his age and played aggressively in sports and was never trying to bully anyone, but the P.E. teachers were trying to tell him to play less competitively, etc.
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