We’re Having 2nd thoughts About Moving from SoCal (Denver: relocating, insurance)

[mrlucero2002]

So my wife ran into the parents of a long lost friend from high school at the grocery store the other day. They were all very excited to see each other again so they set up a date so they could all get together to catch-up. It turns out that my wife’s friend and family had all moved to Colorado close to Parker, for several years. When my wife mentioned that we were relocating to Colorado sometime between April and May, their faces hit the floor.

The mother of my wife’s friend said, “Now you know I love you like my own daughter but the last thing I think you should do is move to Colorado”. She went on to explain the following:
Weather: How cold it gets there, that your bones ache, your lips turn purple, and that winter is basically from August to late April. There are terrible ice storms and lightning storms. During the holiday season we’d be lucky to be able to fly out of the airport due to bad weather and flight cancelations. And we wouldn’t be able to drive home because all of the roads would be closed.

Traffic: The traffic is brutal and road construction is continuous. It can take as much as 5 hrs to get home from work when it snows (est. 20 miles). If the snow fall is bad enough we’d have to pull over to the side of the road and wait it out. And that is dangerous because the snow can completely cover our cars and we can get stuck or hit by other cars.

Cost of Living: Homes are cheaper but energy costs eliminate any savings. Auto Insurance, Food, and Utilities are much more expensive, yet gas and rent can be a bit cheaper. It’s a little difficult to find a good paying job, especially if you’re from out of state.

People: Locals are nice until they find out that you’re from California

Loneliness: Not having any family over there will make us very lonely. Our friends and family would come to visit maybe once but then they not come back too often after and will decide to use their vacation to go everywhere else but Colorado. Any family members with heart conditions arthritis cannot come to visit due to the altitude. Everyone tells us that we are going to have a hard time without our family nearby, especially when we start to have children. How hard is it to make good friends?

So then she basically wrapped up by saying, “Look, I’m not telling you what to do. Go out there for a year and get it out of your system but, don’t buy anything because in a year you’ll be back”. That scared the $%&! out of my wife and after hearing her story I’m a little concerned. We’ve been studying Colorado and the Front Range for a good 18 months and everything I’ve read on this forum and based on other people I’ve talked to how have lived there every thing looked so positive. And now this???

We don’t know what to do. I guess we are going to come to the Denver Metro Area again next month to make a final decision.

Has anybody else experienced having cold feet? What did you do? Did you stay or did you go? What has your experience been now that you’ve made your decision?

[Jezer]

You make your own decisions.

It seems like there are hidden issues behind what was said.

My background is that I moved to the US from the UK and my immediate family's considerations came first.

[Charles]

This is 83% BS. I lived in SoCal for 45 years. The only thing I really don't like about Colorado is driving on icy roads - occasionally - and for like an hour a day four or five days a month in winter. And I live right on the Palmer Divide - Denver is milder in that sense. But the other ten positives outweigh this negative. Yes it is colder. Yes there is more of a weather obstacle to taking kids to the park spontaneously (In all honesty, my wife does complain about this.)


My comments in Go For It Green.

Originally Posted by mrlucero2002

Weather: How cold it gets there, that your bones ache, your lips turn purple,

If you wear a t-shirt in the wind at 40F.

and that winter is basically from August to late April.

Plenty of CD weather threads illustrate otherwise. We can have snowy day in May (like last 5/7) or a t-shirt and shorts day in Jan, Feb, March (like we had today. I have been cycling or playing outdoor basketball at lunch off and on all winter.) And it is almost always sunny and cheerful - no SAD.

There are terrible ice storms and lightning storms.

OK, once in a while, like a couple times a year. Big deal. They're interesting.


During the holiday season we’d be lucky to be able to fly out of the airport due to bad weather and flight cancelations.

(Insert giant hit of a joint sound here) What is this woman smoking???


And we wouldn’t be able to drive home because all of the roads would be closed.

What? Once of twice a year? I don't think any were closed this year and last year maybe once or twice and last year was a really bad winter. OK, one day last year scared the crap out of me. But that was my first experience driving in a full on blizzard.

Traffic: The traffic is brutal and road construction is continuous.

(Time for another hit....) Traffic? Compared to OC?

It can take as much as 5 hrs to get home from work when it snows (est. 20 miles).

Probably a worlds record. Besides, you'll spend an extra five hours per week in traffic on SoCal. Every week.

If the snow fall is bad enough we’d have to pull over to the side of the road and wait it out.

During a blizzard, once every year or two? (Kind of sounds dangerous too.)



Cost of Living: Homes are cheaper but energy costs eliminate any savings.

Pure Bull-loney. $150/sqft compared to $400/sqft: How many outdoor Olympic sized swimming pools does she keep at 103F to use that much energy? Last year our worst gas bill (during a pretty cold February) was around $400 (on a 6200 sqft house).

Auto Insurance, Food, and Utilities are much more expensive, yet gas and rent can be a bit cheaper.

Wrong.

It’s a little difficult to find a good paying job, especially if you’re from out of state.

It is a market economy. What is the demand for your services?

People: Locals are nice until they find out that you’re from California.

Wrong again. I don't walk around with Dodger caps on in Denver bars either.

Loneliness: Not having any family over there will make us very lonely. Our friends and family would come to visit maybe once but then they not come back too often after and will decide to use their vacation to go everywhere else but Colorado.

OK, this is possible.


Any family members with heart conditions arthritis cannot come to visit due to the altitude.

Wrong.

Everyone tells us that we are going to have a hard time without our family nearby, especially when we start to have children. How hard is it to make good friends?


I can make ten friends in ten minutes. (And 20 enemies in five....)

So then she basically wrapped up by saying, “Look, I’m not telling you what to do. Go out there for a year and get it out of your system but, don’t buy anything because in a year you’ll be back”. That scared the $%&! out of my wife and after hearing her story I’m a little concerned. We’ve been studying Colorado and the Front Range for a good 18 months and everything I’ve read on this forum and based on other people I’ve talked to how have lived there every thing looked so positive. And now this???

We don’t know what to do. I guess we are going to come to the Denver Metro Area again next month to make a final decision.

Has anybody else experienced having cold feet? What did you do? Did you stay or did you go? What has your experience been now that you’ve made your decision?

Great move for us: Financially, Traffic, employment, community, stress, new experience. Even if California housing prices were down to $225/sqft, I'd still take Colorado. The traffic alone makes SoCal too undesirable.

[Devin Bent]

I live in New Mexico but at 6,000 feet frequently driving to 7-8,000 feet. I am 67 years old with arthritis and I have no idea what this woman was talking about. The altitude is bad for my arthritis? News to me.

This reminds of a posting I saw about Santa Fe on the New Mexico forum -- the town is overrun with violent, tattooed, Mexican street gangs. Some people are blessed with a LOT of imagination.

[rebagirl]

I had a weird feeling after having visited this past November. I had been many times before and always loved it, but I think the reality of moving there for the long-term set in and made me reconsider. That being said, those feelings have since left, and we are very excited to be moving this summer (if the house sells).

I realized that my previous feelings were based on familiarity and comfort. The area in which I now live is all I've ever known. Staying here would certainly be easier for someone who has never liked change (me!) The area is rapidly declining, though, and ultimately I know Colorado has more to offer my family. I also decided that if I let the fear of change paralyze me, I'll have never experienced what could be the most positive move I ever make.

I also feel that your true friends will support your decision and encourage you. It's a shame that so much negativity was in the conversation you described. Plenty of Californians and others have made the move. Those that I personally know who have left California for Colorado, Idaho, Missouri, Georgia, Virginia and Tennessee have no desire to ever return to California.

Will you miss certain things about California? Of course. I know I will miss the ocean, friends...many things. For me, it's still worth it. California is a two-day drive or a 2-hour flight if, for some reason, I must go there. I'm pretty sure I'll find plenty of new friends, things to do, etc., that will keep me from living in the past and longing for what was in California.

I hope this helps. I researched Colorado for over 2 years, and I feel confident that it is the right place for me and my family.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

[rgb123]

If that scares you, consider Chicago your worst nightmare! Or...God Forbid, Minneapolis.

Seriously, I don't live in Denver. But think of it this way -- lots of people who live where I live (Illlinois or Wisconsin or Michigan) would consider the weather in Denver a VAST improvement.

And seriously, occasional storms are FUN.

If I were you, I'd be more worried about people holding the fact you are from California against you...maybe someone else can elaborate.

[WestCoDude]

Originally Posted by mrlucero2002

So my wife ran into the parents of a long lost friend from high school at the grocery store the other day. They were all very excited to see each other again so they set up a date so they could all get together to catch-up. It turns out that my wife’s friend and family had all moved to Colorado close to Parker, for several years. When my wife mentioned that we were relocating to Colorado sometime between April and May, their faces hit the floor.

The mother of my wife’s friend said, “Now you know I love you like my own daughter but the last thing I think you should do is move to Colorado”. She went on to explain the following:
Weather: How cold it gets there, that your bones ache, your lips turn purple, and that winter is basically from August to late April. There are terrible ice storms and lightning storms. During the holiday season we’d be lucky to be able to fly out of the airport due to bad weather and flight cancelations. And we wouldn’t be able to drive home because all of the roads would be closed.

Traffic: The traffic is brutal and road construction is continuous. It can take as much as 5 hrs to get home from work when it snows (est. 20 miles). If the snow fall is bad enough we’d have to pull over to the side of the road and wait it out. And that is dangerous because the snow can completely cover our cars and we can get stuck or hit by other cars.

Cost of Living: Homes are cheaper but energy costs eliminate any savings. Auto Insurance, Food, and Utilities are much more expensive, yet gas and rent can be a bit cheaper. It’s a little difficult to find a good paying job, especially if you’re from out of state.

People: Locals are nice until they find out that you’re from California

Loneliness: Not having any family over there will make us very lonely. Our friends and family would come to visit maybe once but then they not come back too often after and will decide to use their vacation to go everywhere else but Colorado. Any family members with heart conditions arthritis cannot come to visit due to the altitude. Everyone tells us that we are going to have a hard time without our family nearby, especially when we start to have children. How hard is it to make good friends?

So then she basically wrapped up by saying, “Look, I’m not telling you what to do. Go out there for a year and get it out of your system but, don’t buy anything because in a year you’ll be back”. That scared the $%&! out of my wife and after hearing her story I’m a little concerned. We’ve been studying Colorado and the Front Range for a good 18 months and everything I’ve read on this forum and based on other people I’ve talked to how have lived there every thing looked so positive. And now this???

We don’t know what to do. I guess we are going to come to the Denver Metro Area again next month to make a final decision.

Has anybody else experienced having cold feet? What did you do? Did you stay or did you go? What has your experience been now that you’ve made your decision?

Weather. It's not that cold. It's a lot colder in the midwest and northeast. It snows a lot....but a few days later you'll be loving the 50s and sunny weather in the middle of January. The airport VERY rarely closes and if you're concerned about the roads--which ARE plowed (this isn't Alaska)--then fly out of the one of the world-class American airports. You'll be fine. Just bring your coat and maybe a sweater or two.

Oh....and we never have ice storms. It's rain or snow and DIA is built to handle both.

Traffic. You're from California. Mexico City at rush hour would be better than most of California. Denver's traffic should be the least of your concerns...

Cost of Living: You're from California. Jobs aren't great here but they are there. Pep up your resume before leaving and see if you can find a few leads before coming out here. If you're a decent enough worker with a good resume, you'll be fine. I'd be much more concerned if I was a new grad with zero work experience.

People. How can people hate you for being from California when everybody here is from California? Trust me....we're over it. You people have already ruined our state so...have at it. It's your's....really. If you're a nice person and a good neighbor, people really don't care where you're from.

Lonliness. Okay, here's a legitimate concern. But this is case no matter where you move, right? And California is only a two hour plane ride to Colorado. It's a lot better than moving further east. And there are lots of people living here with heart conditions and arthritis. This is the Mile High City....not Mt. Everest. I'm pretty sure your family will be fine. Maybe a 10 mile jog up Pikes Peak wouldn't be prudent. But....you'll be fine.

However, it IS hard to make friends in Denver. Won't lie about that one. People are very....sheltered, isolated, and reserved. But people are becoming that way EVERYWHERE these days. I've said it once and I'll say it again...this is reason #5578 why you should be involved in a church. If you get involved in a church you will meet people there, they will be good people, and you'll have friends for life. And once you guys start having kids, you will start meeting parents of other kids. You might have to step outside of your comfort zone to meet people, but you can make friends.

Listen, there ARE real compelling reasons NOT to move here. But none of them are those which you listed. The weather here is way crappier compared to California (but it's not nearly as bad as you've heard), people are pretty rude, flakey, superficial, etc. (but....hey...you ARE from California). The reason I'd tell you to think twice is that Colorado is becoming what California was 20 years ago. You're headed for a train wreck that you've already experienced! I would NOT make Colorado a long-term plan unless I had family here. It's the sort of place you come to ski, have fun, make money, and live an outdoorsy life and then leave when you get serious about life--family, kids, career, etc.

And despite all of that, Colorado is an all-around decent place. It might be going downhill, but right now it's very attractive. And many parts--culture, restaurants, etc.--will get better even when the economy and people get worse (just like CA). I grew up in Colorado and would still be happy about raising my kids there. It's really a beautiful, liveable place. I just don't like where it's going.

Whatever you choose, good luck!

[rkb0305]

I think your wife's friend hugely over exaggerated every point she made. We moved from the Central Valley of CA to Highlands Ranch last June (my husband has been here since January 2007). My personal experience - utility bills are lower. Houses are cheaper. The weather is better. I enjoy having seasons. This was my first winter here, but even with snow in October, and snow in March (so far, who knows when the last will be), I really have felt like the truly cold part of winter was short. It warms up really nicely between storms except for maybe in December and January. The one point I agree with is missing family. We left my sister in So Cal and my parents and my in-laws in the Central Valley. I really do miss having the kids grandparents around on a regular basis. We've been fortunate to have frequent visits so far. Good luck with whatever you decide. Oh, and traffic is nothing compared with OC.

[NE Live]

I would say without a doubt that you will miss family and it does become a pain in the rear to fly that far to visit them. Trust me I am trying that now and moving to Denver to be CLOSER to family. I am sick of flying cross country to be around the family during the holidays. Will be much nicer to just hop in the car for a short ride.

[Katiana]

Originally Posted by mrlucero2002

So my wife ran into the parents of a long lost friend from high school at the grocery store the other day. They were all very excited to see each other again so they set up a date so they could all get together to catch-up. It turns out that my wife’s friend and family had all moved to Colorado close to Parker, for several years. When my wife mentioned that we were relocating to Colorado sometime between April and May, their faces hit the floor.

The mother of my wife’s friend said, “Now you know I love you like my own daughter but the last thing I think you should do is move to Colorado”. She went on to explain the following:
Weather: How cold it gets there, that your bones ache, your lips turn purple, and that winter is basically from August to late April. There are terrible ice storms and lightning storms. During the holiday season we’d be lucky to be able to fly out of the airport due to bad weather and flight cancelations. And we wouldn’t be able to drive home because all of the roads would be closed.
Of all the objections, this is the least founded in reality. The earliest snow is in September; many years it does not snow until late Oct or early Nov. There are usually weeks of warm sunny weather between snowfalls. (Warm for winter that is, but it is not unusual to see 65+ degrees in December and January.) The airport is rarely closed for more than a few hours. Ditto for the roads. The last snow is usually some time in April. Any snow in the spring is gone in a few days. So is most of the snow in any month of the year. There is a saying that it doesn't snow on snow here.

Traffic: The traffic is brutal and road construction is continuous. It can take as much as 5 hrs to get home from work when it snows (est. 20 miles). If the snow fall is bad enough we’d have to pull over to the side of the road and wait it out. And that is dangerous because the snow can completely cover our cars and we can get stuck or hit by other cars.
It's been a long time since I've been in SoCal, but this is false, too. There may be a day or two every few years that it takes hours to get home in a snowstorm. Usually in those cases, you are stuck in gridlock and it has just started snowing. That is not the usual way to get into an accident in the snow. Generally, those happen from driving too fast.

Cost of Living: Homes are cheaper but energy costs eliminate any savings. Auto Insurance, Food, and Utilities are much more expensive, yet gas and rent can be a bit cheaper. It’s a little difficult to find a good paying job, especially if you’re from out of state.
I don't think energy costs eliminate any savings. I mean, homes are about 50% lower here (roughly). Our last energy bill was about $200 for a month in a 2500 sq ft house. I don't know about the cost of food and auto insurance in Cali. Being from Cali won't hinder you in finding a job. The coming recession might, though.

People: Locals are nice until they find out that you’re from California
Oh, some are that way, most are not.

Loneliness: Not having any family over there will make us very lonely. Our friends and family would come to visit maybe once but then they not come back too often after and will decide to use their vacation to go everywhere else but Colorado.
I don't know why they'd decide to go "everywhere else but Colorado". I mean, it's relatively close. We have friends who visit from time to time. Yes, of course they go on other vacations, too. What can you expect? Family will come to see you or you will go to see them, or both.
Any family members with heart conditions arthritis cannot come to visit due to the altitude.
This is untrue. There are people who live here with those conditions. I don't know what would make arthritis worse. The altitude has an effect on breathing, yes, but if you don't exert yourself, you're ususally OK.
Everyone tells us that we are going to have a hard time without our family nearby, especially when we start to have children.
Well, I would have loved some family to help out when my kids were little. But when my oldest was still a toddler, my mom was in an accident and was handicapped and couldn't have helped if she lived next door. You never know.
How hard is it to make good friends?
It varies. Sometimes you meet good friends at work, sometimes not. Someone mentioned a church. If you are so inclined, that is a good source for meeting people outside of work. So is volunteer work, service clubs, even social clubs.

So then she basically wrapped up by saying, “Look, I’m not telling you what to do. Go out there for a year and get it out of your system but, don’t buy anything because in a year you’ll be back”. That scared the $%&! out of my wife and after hearing her story I’m a little concerned. We’ve been studying Colorado and the Front Range for a good 18 months and everything I’ve read on this forum and based on other people I’ve talked to how have lived there every thing looked so positive. And now this???

We don’t know what to do. I guess we are going to come to the Denver Metro Area again next month to make a final decision.

Has anybody else experienced having cold feet? What did you do? Did you stay or did you go? What has your experience been now that you’ve made your decision?

I've known people who moved out here from Cali, Pennsylvania, Ohio and other places who have moved back. I've also known people who moved here from those places and have been here for decades.