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Old 03-15-2013, 06:58 PM
 
1 posts, read 856 times
Reputation: 13

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I am a 54 yr old male and my girlfriend is 64 yrs old 10 years older than me ! Here is my delima, I have been going with her 3 1/2 yrs over these years I have found out that she has gone out with 4 other men before me , I have treated her like a wife I have given my heart, my love, and my assistance to help her with her bills I guess you can say that I am mister nice guy ! I send her ecards , surprise gifts ETC you name it ! She in turn only gives me cards on special occasions and holidays, she states to me that all her lovey dove days were when she was young now it is no big deal ! But I tell you it is a big deal to me because that is the way to express ones' feelings for the other and also shows respect and gratitude for each other, I have spoken to her on numerous occasions about this matter and all I get is do not push me I will do it on my own time ! I am hurt and torn over this , because I truely love her and I just would wish she could get that way I feel ! They say that people can be set in their way's but I was taught when I was younger to show Love and respect for people ! She has also stated to me that her mom and dad did not show a lot of love could this be a factor of why she is the way she is or is she hiding something from me ? She says that she is faithful to me but I just wonder ? I do not know if anyone has experienced what I am going through if so I would like some assistance of what to do and where to go with this relationship thank you for hearing me out !
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Old 03-15-2013, 07:29 PM
 
Location: Columbia, SC
6,621 posts, read 14,109,853 times
Reputation: 1829
Past performance is the best indicator of future behavior. After 3 1/2 years it is unlikely that a 64 year old is going to change.
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Old 03-15-2013, 07:36 PM
 
Location: Charleston, South Carolina
9,604 posts, read 13,706,660 times
Reputation: 2051
Force yourself to slow down to her pace. Cool it with the surprise gifts and e-cards. When one person in a relationship overdoes it, it turns the other one off. The fact that she's still your girlfriend after 3 1/2 years of your smothering approach probably says something about her feelings toward you. Another option is to find a girlfriend who is as intense in her approach as you seem to be. And then she might turn you off and you'll see where your current girlfriend is coming from. You should visit a website for relationship advice. This website is for topics related to cities. You could also consider counseling. I'm no counselor, but I read Dear Abby, and she would probably tell you the same thing.
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Old 03-16-2013, 01:23 PM
 
Location: Lexington, SC
4,281 posts, read 10,671,127 times
Reputation: 3715
I say she does not seem to respond to your needs, she thinks the relationship is more casual then you do, and she is a bit old for you.

Me thinks it is time to change lady friends.
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