Missing in St. Andrews/Irmo (Columbia, Lexington: home, living, to move)

[waccamatt]

Originally Posted by sunstate

I moved from Florida (just North of Orlando). I am just having culture shock. I think if you have the same mind-set as the folks here you will be fine. However, if you embrace cultural diversity and enjoy a more metropolitan environment, you will be disappointed.

From what I have heard perhaps the closer you are to the city of Columbia, the better off you will be.

So then you're not living in Columbia. Do you mind if we ask where you live? If you're living out in the country somewhere you can't say you live in Columbia. There is a huge difference between, say, Columbia and Gilbert or Columbia and Pelion.

[Nausikaa]

Originally Posted by Slappy san

I'm a Black atheist "living in sin" with my gf. That could be problematic. I also don't care for politics, hunting or Nascar. I also have can't stand sexism or racism. So yeah I can have issues. I just wouldn't want it to be a problem while working.

You seem to really like stereotyping though.

[waccamatt]

Originally Posted by Slappy san

I'm a Black atheist "living in sin" with my gf. That could be problematic. I also don't care for politics, hunting or Nascar. I also have can't stand sexism or racism. So yeah I can have issues. I just wouldn't want it to be a problem while working.

I think what I have ascertained from the original poster is that they don't live in Columbia, they live in a rural area somewhere near here. I know when you move to a place you're unfamiliar with you have all kinds of questions. Nascar and hunting are mainly rural past times. If you live in the city you're not going to find much of that and living with your bf or gf? Who doesn't?

[mpaquette]

Originally Posted by sunstate

The first time the gay thing was mentioned was by funiture delivery men. I was upacking my household tools and one of them said "where's your husband?. I told him I did not have one and he said "no kids huh?" I said "nope" he felt free to comment "oh, your gay, right?"

A Lowes employee made the gay comment to me as well when I was shopping for fence material. He asked who was putting up the fence and I said "I am". He said, "oh, you and your husband?" I said "no, me". He offered, "you gay?"

Weird. I would not be described as a masculine looking woman.

I for one, find this extremely difficult to believe.

[Nausikaa]

Originally Posted by mpaquette

I for one, find this extremely difficult to believe.

I also find it extremely difficult to believe.

[gsupstate]

Originally Posted by sunstate

After almost three months in this area I can not find decent places to eat. I have tried four chinese restaurants here and all seem to have geared their food for this regions (bland) taste. Pizza is no better with five places tried to date and none make their own sauce or dough. Better Mexican food can be found at Taco Bell than the three places I have tried. The only viable places to eat are chains (sadly). Locals say "well, this is a small town"...huh? I thought the Columbia area had about 1/2 million folks. Service in stores and restaurants is indifferent at best.

I went to a local seafood place and asked the server if anything on the menu was fresh instead of frozen. This should not be a strange question. Places do in fact get delivery of fresh seafood. He responded "oh yeah, we just go out back and catch all our fish on the menu". I asked what sort of breading was used on the fried seafood, cornmeal or flower (like tempora). He said "I dunno....it's just seafood breading". I asked if he would ask the kitchen and he came back and said they did not know. Odd. I expect more from an establishment when my bill for two guests is over $100. P.S. this same server thout it O.K. to serve three girls aged 17 through 19 alchohol. Huh?


I also miss a real newspaper. The State is a joke. It is sad that there is no other source for news here. Local TV news is funny too. No one seems to dress (or talk) like they are on TV. I am having to get all my news from the internet.

I miss taking to people who do not feel a need to know where I go to church. I miss not being told I would "burn in hell" unless I was "saved".

I miss being able to go to Home Depot or Lowes and finding someone there who knows the products the store sells. I miss being able to find items in those stores when I need them. I had to wait three weeks for an "in stock" item to come in and was told that is common.

I miss real and genuine people. People here may say "yes mame and no mame" but I would rather have a genuine smile and exchange once in a while from a clerk or server giving a response to an inquiry than a blank stare and hear that automatic, fake, humorless bleating of "yes mame".

I miss racial acceptance. I think it is terrible that a town would employ a police office who would feel free to use the N word to me just because I am a middle aged white woman.

I miss being around people who think it is O.K. to be anything but a republican. I have been cursed at for being a Dem. What?

I miss not being openly accused of being gay just because I am unmarried and have no children. Weird.

I am sure this writing will be met with the same sort of attitude I have been encountering to date. That is "we don't need your kind here anyway".

Any others reading this, beware if you are a forward thinking, non racist, libral democrat. Oh yeah, and I hope you are a good cook because you will eat at home A LOT.

Hi Sunstate,
As I read your post, I had to chuckle. I really identified with much of what you were saying, as it sounds much like what I said 10 years back when I briefly lived in Jackson, Mississippi due to my career.

What I discovered then, was that you have to dig deep in some cities to find those with sensibilities that match yours. Some cities just simply don't have the depth, knowledge or detail level as others. Jackson was one of those cities. You're comment about the breading on the fish is strangely identical to an incident I had in Jackson....I ask the waiter (at a better restaurant) the major ingredients of the clam chowder and he said clams. Beyond that, he had to run back and forth to the kitchen to finally tell me some of the major ingredients.

Take heart though and stick with it. You will find a few with your sensibilities. You'll find a restaurant with a waiter that gets "it" and it will become your new hangout. You'll find an employee at Lowe's that can give you those quick witted exchanges instead of the blank stares, and that employee will become your "go to" for home needs. Etc. Etc. It does, unfortunately, take much longer than 3 months in some cities. In the meantime, do some roadtrips...Atlanta, Charlotte, etc.

Wishing you the best, as I've been in the same exact situation. There is light at the end of the tunnel.

[Nausikaa]

Originally Posted by gsupstate

Hi Sunstate,
As I read your post, I had to chuckle. I really identified with much of what you were saying, as it sounds much like what I said 10 years back when I briefly lived in Jackson, Mississippi due to my career.

What I discovered then, was that you have to dig deep in some cities to find those with sensibilities that match yours. Some cities just simply don't have the depth, knowledge or detail level as others. Jackson was one of those cities. You're comment about the breading on the fish is strangely identical to an incident I had in Jackson....I ask the waiter (at a better restaurant) the major ingredients of the clam chowder and he said clams. Beyond that, he had to run back and forth to the kitchen to finally tell me some of the major ingredients.

Take heart though and stick with it. You will find a few with your sensibilities. You'll find a restaurant with a waiter that gets "it" and it will become your new hangout. You'll find an employee at Lowe's that can give you those quick witted exchanges instead of the blank stares, and that employee will become your "go to" for home needs. Etc. Etc. It does, unfortunately, take much longer than 3 months in some cities. In the meantime, do some roadtrips...Atlanta, Charlotte, etc.

Wishing you the best, as I've been in the same exact situation. There is light at the end of the tunnel.

I had to chuckle. I lived in Atlanta for quite a few years. As far as visiting Lowes/Home Depot, don't expect to find better service in ATL than Columbia. Columbia will win that one hands down.

[waccamatt]

Originally Posted by gsupstate

Hi Sunstate,
As I read your post, I had to chuckle. I really identified with much of what you were saying, as it sounds much like what I said 10 years back when I briefly lived in Jackson, Mississippi due to my career.

What I discovered then, was that you have to dig deep in some cities to find those with sensibilities that match yours. Some cities just simply don't have the depth, knowledge or detail level as others. Jackson was one of those cities. You're comment about the breading on the fish is strangely identical to an incident I had in Jackson....I ask the waiter (at a better restaurant) the major ingredients of the clam chowder and he said clams. Beyond that, he had to run back and forth to the kitchen to finally tell me some of the major ingredients.

Take heart though and stick with it. You will find a few with your sensibilities. You'll find a restaurant with a waiter that gets "it" and it will become your new hangout. You'll find an employee at Lowe's that can give you those quick witted exchanges instead of the blank stares, and that employee will become your "go to" for home needs. Etc. Etc. It does, unfortunately, take much longer than 3 months in some cities. In the meantime, do some roadtrips...Atlanta, Charlotte, etc.

Wishing you the best, as I've been in the same exact situation. There is light at the end of the tunnel.

I think this takes the cake for one of the most arrogant and sarcastic responses I've ever read on this forum. I find it especially amusing from someone else who lives in South Carolina. Pot, meet kettle.

[mustangtiff21]

Originally Posted by sunstate

I moved from Florida (just North of Orlando). I am just having culture shock. I think if you have the same mind-set as the folks here you will be fine. However, if you embrace cultural diversity and enjoy a more metropolitan environment, you will be disappointed.

From what I have heard perhaps the closer you are to the city of Columbia, the better off you will be.

I feel for you and how you feel about the culture shock. I am originally from PA/NY and it was a whole other world to me too. However, it is the Bible belt, which is fine with me, and afterall, when you grow up a certain way and all you know is to be polite and say Yes Ma'am/Sir then thats all you know. I had to learn myself that people will not change for someone who is moving (literally) into their own world. I guess people (like my southern husband) would and do have culture shock themselves when they go to areas like you and I are from. Last year on our honeymoon he was in culture shock in Ft. Lauderdale because of the super fast pace down there. It was nothing to me, its similar to back home.

Oh and the food...I myself have had a hard time finding a good true blue mom and pop non chain Italian resturant. After all...thats what I grew up around. But if you feel up to it or get the chance try LaBrasca's Pizza over in Forest Acres. Not the best place to look at but I just tried it friday and its Wonderful! My dad and I could not get over how excellent it was and how it tasted like "back home".

I wish you the best...and trust me...I felt the same way you did when I first moved here 3 yrs ago. Its just like you said...culture shock. But it gets better, honest. I wouldn't trade SC for back home in a heart beat, not to mention the weather and economy is far better here.

[waccamatt]

Originally Posted by mustangtiff21

I feel for you and how you feel about the culture shock. I am originally from PA/NY and it was a whole other world to me too. However, it is the Bible belt, which is fine with me, and afterall, when you grow up a certain way and all you know is to be polite and say Yes Ma'am/Sir then thats all you know. I had to learn myself that people will not change for someone who is moving (literally) into their own world. I guess people (like my southern husband) would and do have culture shock themselves when they go to areas like you and I are from. Last year on our honeymoon he was in culture shock in Ft. Lauderdale because of the super fast pace down there. It was nothing to me, its similar to back home.

Oh and the food...I myself have had a hard time finding a good true blue mom and pop non chain Italian resturant. After all...thats what I grew up around. But if you feel up to it or get the chance try LaBrasca's Pizza over in Forest Acres. Not the best place to look at but I just tried it friday and its Wonderful! My dad and I could not get over how excellent it was and how it tasted like "back home".

I wish you the best...and trust me...I felt the same way you did when I first moved here 3 yrs ago. Its just like you said...culture shock. But it gets better, honest. I wouldn't trade SC for back home in a heart beat, not to mention the weather and economy is far better here.

I love LaBrasca's; they've had the same chianti bottles hanging from the ceiling for the last 30+ years. It did take a long time for me to get used to the slower pace of life down here, but I love it in Columbia and probably will never live anywhere else.