[SeaDoo342]

Originally Posted by BlakeJones

You're right, if everyone let this guy off the hook their family would be just fine

He's getting the scorn he deserves, and hopefully that'll be a lesson to other potentially inattentive parents out there.

Wow thats pretty nasty...

[Sigequinox]

Originally Posted by kidyankee764

For those of you crucifying this father, keep in mind he is currently in a psychiatric center strapped to a gurney being pumped with drugs. His wife hates him. This family is completely ripped apart.

But tearing him down makes us feel better, right?

Wow.What's that term for a cat?

[dazzleman]

Originally Posted by kidyankee764

For those of you crucifying this father, keep in mind he is currently in a psychiatric center strapped to a gurney being pumped with drugs. His wife hates him. This family is completely ripped apart.

But tearing him down makes us feel better, right?

Whether we want to admit it or not, we're all capable of making a mistake like that. My heart goes out to the whole family.

[BlakeJones]

Originally Posted by dazzleman

Whether we want to admit it or not, we're all capable of making a mistake like that. My heart goes out to the whole family.

I have to disagree, by forgetting your child is in the backseat you are essentially failing to provide the necessary attention to your responsibility of being a caretaker. It's a matter of not putting enough priority on the most important thing in the car - which is not that morning's meetings, not what you're going to have for lunch, not what you're going to to talk to guys about from the game last night, etc etc

I definitely feel for that family, unfortunately the father brought it on to them by doing what he did. Completely inexcusable

[in_newengland]

I feel sorry for the father even though he was to blame. I don't think we can place 100% blame on people who do this. As mentioned already, car seats are placed in the back seat. People don't turn around and look in the back seat.

Life is stressful and these tragedies usually seem to happen when there has been an upset in plans--like the guy was supposed to take the kid to daycare, something he didn't usually do. Then again, maybe he wasn't feeling well or was upset about something. Everyone makes mistakes.

I am a type A person who probably would never do such a thing as this. I'd check and double check. But there are exceptions to every rule. This person will never have a day in his life that he doesn't feel absolutely guilty and worthless. That will be enough punishment.

[BlakeJones]

Originally Posted by in_newengland

This person will never have a day in his life that he doesn't feel absolutely guilty and worthless. That will be enough punishment.

Honestly there's no point in punishing this guy - it's not like he would ever do this again (or likely have another kid for that matter). And it's not like you need a criminal deterrent for this sort of negligence, the loss of a child should be deterrent enough.

Like you said he's living though his punishment now. He'll never be able to live it down - tragic story all around

[kidyankee764]

Originally Posted by Sigequinox

Wow.What's that term for a cat?

Really?

[shyguylh]

Originally Posted by Scott R

{snip} That's the other problem I have with much of society in general these days. People don't want to deal with sticky situations themselves, but they're more than anxious to "outsource" their conflict resolution to the police. Neighbor having a loud party or hasn't cut their lawn in a couple of months? Heaven forbid you should approach them yourself, get to know them, and try to have a positive influence on the situation that way. No, far too many people are quick to call the police and complain about their neighbor, and you better believe that they want to be completely anonymous.

I could not agree more with that. In fact, I think this is something that should be addressed. To wit: I think police should REFUSE to respond to situations like this where the caller is too chicken to investigate THEMSELVES. I mean, why SHOULDN'T the busybody investigate themselves? They think they have all the answers, they think they have the right to tell OTHER PEOPLE how to parent THEIR children, or how loud music can be etc--hey, stand behind your allegation, or stay out of it completely. If the neighbor's music is too loud for you, then YOU tell them, stop being such a wuss. Besides, many times a would-be "offender" really doesn't realize they're bothering someone, maybe the previous neighbor had different expectations and was okay with how things were and they didn't expect that someone else would be different. It happens.

As for parenting, and issues like these, it's like a lot of things, it's out of balance. It's an overreaction to a previous wrong situation, to such a point that now things are just as wrong as before, just in the opposite way. It used to be that parents had almost 100% authority to parent as they pleased even if they were practically raping their children on a nightly basis. Eventually, we responded to that, as we should have. However, now that has been taken too far, and people think they get to judge and poke their nose into people's parenting business in every situation. No, you don't.

I understand many people feel an obligation to protect children from being harmed by awful parents, the problem is anymore things are being called awful that to many aren't. Some people think it's awful to let your children play in the street without constant 100% hovering, even if the "street" has very light traffic levels and even if the child is very competent at how they handle themselves. Others think it's awful to do the reverse, because it stifles a child's enjoyment and adventure of life and ability to "self entertain" and meet other kids their age and play in a wonderful unstructured way.

In matters such as those, the parents and ONLY the parents should choose, period. It shouldn't be up to anybody else. They can state their opinion all day long, and certainly friends will share opinions with their friends and family etc, but the ultimate decision lays with the parent, and SHOULD lay with the parent. Period.

This applies to these situations too, there is a huge difference between a child locked in a really HOT car while the parent is two-stepping in a bar, which I think pretty much ALL of us agree that's wrong, and a child in a car for 1-2 minutes at a gas station in 65'F temperatures. The latter situation, there are PLENTY of people who find that just fine, and I agree with them. That should be a parent's decision and ONLY a parent's decision, PERIOD.

In fact, I dare say that not only should calls from such people who are being nosy be ignored, I think that when a person becomes too goody-goody and busy-body about this sort of thing, they should be prosecuted for harassment. They create a "chilling" environment where parents are scared to parent how they think is right out of fear of reporting from the nosy crowd. Parents shouldn't have to run their decisions by every busybody for their approval. The parents are the ones doing the grunt work and ponying up the funds, and that gives them, within the means of decency, pretty much absolute authority to parent THEIR way. If the busy bodies want a vote, then let them pay for everything, let them do all the grunt work, let them have the kids live with them and tear up their house for awhile. As long as they aren't bearing any of that, their opinion means as much to a parent as dog doo-doo means to a wine connoisseur.

[Mike 75]

Originally Posted by shyguylh

I could not agree more with that. In fact, I think this is something that should be addressed. To wit: I think police should REFUSE to respond to situations like this where the caller is too chicken to investigate THEMSELVES. I mean, why SHOULDN'T the busybody investigate themselves? They think they have all the answers, they think they have the right to tell OTHER PEOPLE how to parent THEIR children, or how loud music can be etc--hey, stand behind your allegation, or stay out of it completely. If the neighbor's music is too loud for you, then YOU tell them, stop being such a wuss. Besides, many times a would-be "offender" really doesn't realize they're bothering someone, maybe the previous neighbor had different expectations and was okay with how things were and they didn't expect that someone else would be different. It happens.

I don't really understand what the "busybody" should do absent calling the police. Should the "busybody" take the situation into their own hands and smash the window of the car to get the child out? Or should they just mind their own business while the child cooks to death in the car? Should they start a confrontation with the parent when they come back to the car? And while I agree with you that the proper way to handle a noise complaint is to go directly to the source, I don't see how you can fault anyone for calling 911 with a child in a hot car.

[PDD]

Originally Posted by smackfu

They put the kids in the front seat back then, so it was a lot harder to forgot them.

No No stupid people forget kids in their cars.
Intelligent people do not do this.

Anybody can forget their keys in a car, it takes a real stupid person to forget their kids.