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Old 01-24-2015, 09:54 AM
 
Location: usa
1,001 posts, read 818,933 times
Reputation: 815

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Father of alleged Prior Lake Snapchat bullies loses job - KMSP-TV

basic a white man and wife adopted an african american girl. The girl is now in 8th grade and was subjected to some "bullying" in the form of some presumably white high school boys calling her the n word and some other not so nice thing.

anyway the father caught wind of it and went to the police and other thing. He talked to the "bullies" dad and the "bullies" dad was like, "whatever, it what I use to do as a kid. we use the n word all the time" and also insulted the father.


the "victims" father made an youtube video about what was happening (he also outed the bullies).

this is the video the dad made



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iKVQX35yYc8


did he go to far? I mean kids get bullied all the time, especially if they aren't white. it's kind of an accepted part of life. I'm a mixed race child, and I was bullied at times. I certainly wouldn't have told my parents or had my parents confront anyone (not that they would, they would have told me to sucked it up).

Last edited by stellastar2345; 01-24-2015 at 10:38 AM..
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Old 01-24-2015, 10:24 AM
 
2,073 posts, read 1,390,596 times
Reputation: 746
Quote:
Originally Posted by stellastar2345 View Post
Father of alleged Prior Lake Snapchat bullies loses job - KMSP-TV

basic a white man and wife adopted an african american girl. The girl is now in 8th grade and was subjected to some "bullying" in the form of some presumably white high school boys calling her the n word and some other not so nice thing.

anyway the father caught wind of it and went to the police and other thing. He talked to the "bullies" dad and the "bullies" dad was like, "whatever, it what I use to do as a kid. we use the n word all the time" and also insulted the father.


the "victims" father made an youtube video about what was happening (he also outed the bullies).

this is the video the dad made



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iKVQX35yYc8

anyway, he was fired for his job for posting that video.


did he go to far? I mean kids get bullied all the time, especially if they aren't white. it's kind of an accepted part of life. I'm a mixed race child, and I was bullied at times. I certainly wouldn't have told my parents or had my parents confront anyone (not that they would, they would have told me to sucked it up).
ROFL OP! The White father of the adopted Black girl who made the video was NOT the one who was fired lol... The racist sorry excuse of a man let alone a father was the one who was fired. Bullying is NOT okay. Just because it happens does not make it okay. Bullying can lead to school shootings, fights, suicide etc. God I hope that you do not have any children of your own.

One more thing, before starting a thread, at least know what you're talking about. You got another thing wrong. Their Black daughter did NOT ask her parents to confront anyone nor did she bring it to their attention. The daughters White friend brought it to the Black girl's parents attention...
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Old 01-24-2015, 10:34 AM
 
Location: usa
1,001 posts, read 818,933 times
Reputation: 815
Quote:
Originally Posted by DoniDanko View Post
ROFL OP! The White father of the adopted Black girl who made the video was NOT the one who was fired lol... The racist sorry excuse of a man let alone a father was the one who was fired. Bullying is NOT okay. Just because it happens does not make it okay. Bullying can lead to school shootings, fights, suicide etc. God I hope that you do not have any children of your own.

One more thing, before starting a thread, at least know what you're talking about. You got another thing wrong. Their Black daughter did NOT ask her parents to confront anyone nor did she bring it to their attention. The daughters White friend brought it to the Black girl's parents attention...
you're right, i miss typed that statement, he wasn't the one fired. Either way, I think he went a little to far.

I never said their daughter brought it up to her parents.
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Old 01-24-2015, 10:55 AM
 
Location: usa
1,001 posts, read 818,933 times
Reputation: 815
someone mentioned this, but I think the comment disappeared, I don't think he's a poor parent. In fact, I think he's probably a better parent than my parent. I just think he went a bit too overboard on the "over protecting your child" scale.
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Old 01-24-2015, 11:12 AM
Status: "Rocktober...well that was fast. :-(" (set 20 days ago)
 
Location: Fredericksburg, VA
10,296 posts, read 10,450,237 times
Reputation: 13244
Quote:
Originally Posted by stellastar2345 View Post
someone mentioned this, but I think the comment disappeared, I don't think he's a poor parent. In fact, I think he's probably a better parent than my parent. I just think he went a bit too overboard on the "over protecting your child" scale.
You may be referring to my comment, but it was meant for the "note home" thread, not this one so I deleted it and posted it there.

Regarding bullying, I think it's a part of life. I think it is important kids learn to deal with it. I also think when parents try to use the system to address bullying and the system fails, it's "no-holds barred" at that point. I got bullied in high school quite a bit. A white guy in a predominantly Hispanic area, so I was a natural target. We tried to use the school's "conflict resolution" system. That was about as effective as trying to scoop up water with a rake. My parents had discussions with the school.

I'm not proud to say it, because I wish it hadn't come to this, but what finally resolved the issue was when one of the bullies crossed the threshold my dad allowed for me to push back. The bullying stopped after a fist fight in which a well placed punch ripped out his braces, as well as me taking him to the ground and holding his face under water in a muddy puddle. Over-reaction? I don't think so. I tried to use the school's program, as well as the local police department's "de-escalation methods" and they didn't work. Beating the s*** out of one of the guys bullying me? That worked.

Now as a matter of policy, I can understand why anti-bullying campaigns can't endorse an "if all else fails" chapter. These programs are designed to demonstrate how reasoning can overcome bullying and violence. However the reality of the world we live in does not always conform to this model. It rarely does, in fact. Many of these programs are effective in theory because of the presumption of reason and rationality on all parties involved. Bullies aren't reasonable. Bullying isn't rational. I will always encourage my kids to exhaust every means available. I also realize not all bullying crosses into assault the way I experienced. However, I will teach my kids the moment it does cross that threshold, diplomacy is over and upholding one's dignity through valid self defense has begun.
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Old 01-24-2015, 11:29 AM
 
4,749 posts, read 3,465,796 times
Reputation: 3223
Quote:
Originally Posted by stellastar2345 View Post
Father of alleged Prior Lake Snapchat bullies loses job - KMSP-TV

basic a white man and wife adopted an african american girl. The girl is now in 8th grade and was subjected to some "bullying" in the form of some presumably white high school boys calling her the n word and some other not so nice thing.

anyway the father caught wind of it and went to the police and other thing. He talked to the "bullies" dad and the "bullies" dad was like, "whatever, it what I use to do as a kid. we use the n word all the time" and also insulted the father.


the "victims" father made an youtube video about what was happening (he also outed the bullies).

this is the video the dad made



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iKVQX35yYc8


did he go to far? I mean kids get bullied all the time, especially if they aren't white. it's kind of an accepted part of life. I'm a mixed race child, and I was bullied at times. I certainly wouldn't have told my parents or had my parents confront anyone (not that they would, they would have told me to sucked it up).
You're free to handle it or not handle it however you wish. The father has that same right. He was protecting his child. If I'm understanding it correctly, the father of the bullies left voice mails for the father of the girl being bullied that were beyond the pale.

Assuming that's what really happened, all I can say is:

a) What kind of idiot would leave a recording like that in this day and age and not expect consequences?

b) I have no sympathy for a bigot.
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Old 01-24-2015, 11:35 AM
 
Location: Old Mother Idaho
19,360 posts, read 13,021,568 times
Reputation: 14065
Quote:
Originally Posted by stellastar2345 View Post
someone mentioned this, but I think the comment disappeared, I don't think he's a poor parent. In fact, I think he's probably a better parent than my parent. I just think he went a bit too overboard on the "over protecting your child" scale.
Maybe he did go overboard. But the bullying stopped.

Over 25 years ago, one of my sons, then age 13, suddenly had a new 'friend' who was coming over to our house all the time. I came home unexpectedly in the middle of the afternoon, and walked in to find a situation. The new 'friend', who was 3 years older, over a foot taller, and at least 50 pounds heavier than my son suddenly shut up as I walked in the door, and then left as suddenly. My son was pale and looked shaken.

I asked him what had just gone on, and learned the kid had been bullying him every day after school for the past few weeks. The bullying became progressively worse, and the kid had just demanded my son go over to a neighbor's house to steal something or he would be beaten up. That was the conversation that suddenly stopped when I walked in the door.

The kid stayed away until the following week afterwards, but when he thought the coast was clear again, he came back to my home. My son called, said he was coming, and I was waiting for him.

While i never intended to lay a hand on him, and never would have, I gave him a strong dose of his own medicine, and threatened him with a whooping if I ever saw him on my block, on my side of the street again. He threatened to sic his father on me, and I said to bring him over the next time the kid came. Win or lose with his old man, I was still going to thrash him.

It was all just talk. But I showed the kid very clearly that he couldn't intimidate me in any way. it also showed him I was willing to go to any length I needed to protect my son.

It worked. he never came back. I later learned he was a standout football player who had been close to being kicked off his high school team for bullying other team members at school. After his set-to with me, that bullying stopped as well, and the kid actually went on to make a few honest friends.

I never heard anything from his father. I do not know anything about the man, so I can't say if he was also a bully or not. I do know than some kids bully their parents first, so I prefer to think the kid's dad just didn't know about him, or was afraid to stand up to him.

Sure- I could have gotten into real trouble. I was very glad he didn't try my bluff, and I never did anything like that again. That was back in the day, long before social media was even around.

I think the father in the video did the right thing for his daughter 100%. There are times when a bully must learn there are consequences. If he's a child, and his father taught him, the father needs to learn there are consequences, too. Bullies are immune to politeness. They feed on pleading like a vampire feeds on blood.
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Old 01-24-2015, 11:55 AM
 
377 posts, read 574,597 times
Reputation: 488
Bullying is NOT an accepted part of life. Yes bullying happens, and sometimes things that are labeled bullying aren't necessary bullying just mean kids being kids. I'm glad the father did what he did even if it was a bit overboard. The thing is everyone takes bullying differently. It may roll off one kids back but another kid may be very affected by it (and some that are bullied become bullies and the cycle continues). Not everyone is going to react to things the same way. OP you may have been fine with it, but that doesn't mean the next person has to be.
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Old 01-24-2015, 11:59 AM
 
Location: PHL-Terminal C, Gate 11
152 posts, read 242,270 times
Reputation: 339
The OP's post was poorly written and difficult to understand.
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Old 01-24-2015, 12:02 PM
 
Location: Bel Air, California
20,344 posts, read 20,428,723 times
Reputation: 31588
Quote:
Originally Posted by nosyneighbors View Post
The OP's post was poorly written and difficult to understand.
what do you mean?
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