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Absolutely. Part of being a bad parent is doing things out of order. And making choices that lead to impossible situations. But the bottom line? Day care is a terrible and destructive place for kids. So no matter how you get there, if you are sticking your infant in a day care setting, you are the definition of a bad parent. Good parents don't put their kids in bad places.
And don't argue with me. There isn't a parent alive who doesn't feel pangs of guilt and melancholy when dropping an infant off at the day care. They know it's wrong. They might have no choice now, since they effed up their life to lead them to this point. But they know it's wrong at the deepest levels.
What if you are a single parent through untimely death of a spouse? Despite perfect planning, bad things happen sometimes. Should that single parent go on welfare and stay home or use day care in order to work? You have put that parent in a no win situation.
Absolutely. Part of being a bad parent is doing things out of order. And making choices that lead to impossible situations. But the bottom line? Day care is a terrible and destructive place for kids. So no matter how you get there, if you are sticking your infant in a day care setting, you are the definition of a bad parent. Good parents don't put their kids in bad places.
And don't argue with me. There isn't a parent alive who doesn't feel pangs of guilt and melancholy when dropping an infant off at the day care. They know it's wrong. They might have no choice now, since they effed up their life to lead them to this point. But they know it's wrong at the deepest levels.
huh?
I'm quite sure I'm alive, and I don't feel the slightest bit guilty for dropping my kid at day care
What if you are a single parent through untimely death of a spouse? Despite perfect planning, bad things happen sometimes. Should that single parent go on welfare and stay home or use day care in order to work? You have put that parent in a no win situation.
In this case you are forced to be a bad parent. But the unfortunate and VERY RARE situation you have posited does not change the fact that you are a bad parent. It means you are doing the best you can, but it is not good enough.
Because day care cannot replace parental love in the critical first 5 years of a child's life. It's not possible. A parent's direct, focused, and persistent direction and affection has to be better for a child's development than sticking the kid in a warehouse.
In this case you are forced to be a bad parent. But the unfortunate and VERY RARE situation you have posited does not change the fact that you are a bad parent. It means you are doing the best you can, but it is not good enough.
It's not that rare.
Just so you know, day care is not the terrible situation you are trying to make it. A good one helps socialize kids, prepare them for kindergarten, and often provides enrichment that parents may find it difficult to provide themselves.
Not every family can afford for mom to stay home.
My older son's wife is a SAHM who is homeschooling.
My younger son and his wife both work (she, part time). That son has been the stay at home father at times due to their work schedules. They use day care, including one in the past that was bilingual.
Both families have kids who are happy, well adjusted, and doing great.
Those kids have great parents.
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Because day care cannot replace parental love in the critical first 5 years of a child's life. It's not possible. A parent's direct, focused, and persistent direction and affection has to be better for a child's development than sticking the kid in a warehouse.
"Has to be better?"
There are daycare facilities that are more than "warehouses" - much more. The quality of the facility does matter.
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And maybe if the mother of this 3 year old future psychopath was home raising her children in person, we could have avoided the broiled sibling.
Maybe I missed it, but I have seen nothing mentioning day care with regard to the children in the OP. Perhaps you could provide a link.
Last edited by suzy_q2010; 12-04-2015 at 02:52 PM..
Just so you know, day care is not the terrible situation you are trying to make it. A good one helps socialize kids, prepare them for kindergarten, and often provides enrichment that parents may find it difficult to provide themselves.
I provided the links. And I could have provided 10 more. The socializing kids argument is popular and utterly wrong. A pack of unsupervised brats is NOT a socializing process, it is a mob training process, and brings out the worst in all, with negative repercussions in later life.
Not every family can afford for mom to stay home.
Yes they can, or there shouldn't be children. Every family SHOULD have a stay at home mom. It is the ideal situation and the best situation for young children. Having kids is a choice and a responsibility. It should not be undertaken without a stable home and work situation that supports parents personally raising their kids. No mom to be at home? Don't have kids. Simple and correct choice.
My older son's wife is a SAHM who is homeschooling.
That is a good mom! Especially the homeschooling part!
My younger son and his wife both work (she, part time). That son has been the stay at home father at times due to their work schedules. They use day care, including one in the past that was bilingual.
They are bad parents. Especially the wife, but both are guilty. The kids should not be dumped and warehoused by strangers. Ever. They should not have had kids if they are both working outside the home.
Both families have kids who are happy, well adjusted, and doing great.
No they don't and no they are not. Damage is being done, and it will be realized later in their kids lives.
Those kids have great parents.
No they don't. It's not possible because they are choosing a course of action that is destructive and detrimental to their kids. Great parents don't do that. You are not objective and probably don't want to face the truth of the situation. Hopefully you raised your kids yourself and did not warehouse them with strangers and the other equally neglected children of other bad parents.
"Has to be better?"
There are daycare facilities that are more than "warehouses" - much more. The quality of the facility does matter.
No, every day care center is a warehouse. LOVE AND PARENTAL GUIDANCE, DIRECTION, AND AFFECTION ARE BEING OMITTED because people are too lazy or stupid to do the job correctly and lovingly. No day care provides anything close to parental care.
Maybe I missed it, but I have seen nothing mentioning day care with regard to the children in the OP. Perhaps you could provide a link.
In this case there was neither day care nor parental care while the future psychopaths were broiling their sister.
Last edited by Marc Paolella; 12-04-2015 at 03:56 PM..
Inconvenient truths, Marc, but wasted on the brainwashed who think mothers are unnecessary and worthless. How else would they agree to so easily be replaced by total strangers who don't even care about the kids?
Btw, from a brain development standpoint, children don't socialize until much older than most of the ones that are put in daycare. So that whole socialization thing is a total bunch of crap.
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