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I have to wonder how the man that did this act made it into his late 30's with such issues?
Drugs and Booze perhaps combined with other issues and he snapped or maybe words were exchanged when he pestered her and then he snapped etc.
Glad the cops put the guy 6-feet under, I'm just wondering how such a disturbed individual could make it to his age without getting put away for life from some previous action.
Christopher O’Kroley was rolled out in court on Friday in a wheelchair and a suicide-prevention smock to face charges that he gunned down a former co-worker, Caroline Nosal, in the Metro Market grocery store parking lot where they both worked after she rejected him romantically.
Although I am loathe to get involved in threads like these because of how sour they can get, I gotta put my 2 cents in for Team Womanhood. First off, my condolences to these women's families and children. Secondly, I don't think that women are never the instigator, however, narcissistic men are known for pulling DARVO, so I'm always suspicious of the "She just went crazy and is an abusive psycho" story. If you look just beneath the surface there is usually a more honest picture, typically one the man isn't admitting to that involves escalating control or significant gaslighting.
In my experience, men can really be pushy and scary and it's more men than you would think. Thankfully I'm past the dating scene, but in my young adult days I had several run ins with men that I did not provoke and that left me feeling pretty pissed off and threatened. For instance, one night in college I was waiting for my friend to finish up the late shift at a local coffeeshop, and sitting on a couch in the corner reading. It was late - about 145am, so the nearby bars were letting out. A guy stumbled in and sat down at the table next to me.
A minute later I felt someone grab the top of my leg and heard a voice say, "You look like you have some sexual tension. So do I. Come out to my car and we can relieve it together." WTF!? I swiped his hand away and said, "No. GTF away from me." He actually looked a little surprised. I guess he really thought I was gonna jump up and say, "Yeah, sure!" (I do wonder if porn hasn't made certain men really stupid in this regard?) At any rate, it was creepy but I just blew it off as random drunk guy. On a side note, some people love to argue that women only dislike when ugly guys hit on them - not so, this guy could have looked like David Beckham and I would have been creeped out.
Anyway, when we were starting to leave, I looked out the window just because of a bad feeling about it and sure enough, creepy drunk dude is still pacing the sidewalk outside waiting for us to leave. We actually called one of the bars next door and the bouncers came and walked us to the car. The guy was intimidated enough to not try anything else that night, but I found out that he showed up the next day at the shop asking people about me. He then proceeded to pester people at the coffeeshop daily until word got to the owner and they banned him from the premises.
Ask any woman and she will likely have plenty of stories like mine of being stalked and harassed after clearly saying no to some random guy. People argue that it's a just a few bad apples, but some of those bad apples are murdering women over entitlement, and it needs to be addressed for what it is - violence against women simply because they are women. It makes me furious that these women lost their lives and their children lost their mothers over immature men who can't take no for an answer.
Last edited by Canyon Rose; 02-07-2016 at 09:26 AM..
Although I am loathe to get involved in threads like these because of how sour they can get, I gotta put my 2 cents in for Team Womanhood. First off, my condolences to these women's families and children. Secondly, I don't think that women are never the instigator, however, narcissistic men are known for pulling DARVO, so I'm always suspicious of the "She just went crazy and is an abusive psycho" story. If you look just beneath the surface there is usually a more honest picture, typically one the man isn't admitting to that involves escalating control or significant gaslighting.
In my experience, men can really be pushy and scary and it's more men than you would think. Thankfully I'm past the dating scene, but in my young adult days I had several run ins with men that I did not provoke and that left me feeling pretty pissed off and threatened. For instance, one night in college I was waiting for my friend to finish up the late shift at a local coffeeshop, and sitting on a couch in the corner reading. It was late - about 145am, so the nearby bars were letting out. A guy stumbled in and sat down at the table next to me.
A minute later I felt someone grab the top of my leg and heard a voice say, "You look like you have some sexual tension. So do I. Come out to my car and we can relieve it together." WTF!? I swiped his hand away and said, "No. GTF away from me." He actually looked a little surprised. I guess he really thought I was gonna jump up and say, "Yeah, sure!" (I do wonder if porn hasn't made certain men really stupid in this regard?) At any rate, it was creepy but I just blew it off as random drunk guy. On a side note, some people love to argue that women only dislike when ugly guys hit on them - not so, this guy could have looked like David Beckham and I would have been creeped out.
Anyway, when we were starting to leave, I looked out the window just because of a bad feeling about it and sure enough, creepy drunk dude is still pacing the sidewalk outside waiting for us to leave. We actually called one of the bars next door and the bouncers came and walked us to the car. The guy was intimidated enough to not try anything else that night, but I found out that he showed up the next day at the shop asking people about me. He then proceeded to pester people at the coffeeshop daily until word got to the owner and they banned him from the premises.
Ask any woman and she will likely have plenty of stories like mine of being stalked and harassed after clearly saying no to some random guy. People argue that it's a just a few bad apples, but some of those bad apples are murdering women over entitlement, and it needs to be addressed for what it is - violence against women simply because they are women. It makes me furious that these women lost their lives and their children lost their mothers over immature men who can't no for an answer.
I don't have a stalking story but I did date a guy on & off for about 2 months. Something was just off about him, I had this bad feeling, so I ended it for good. He started dating someone else & about a month into that, the girl wanted to break it off with him & he ended up murdering her. In her house, in front of her kids. I was in shock for a few days because that easily could've been me. The moral of the story is, listen to your intuition, it could save your life.
On a lighter note, I've been hit on by guys who I've said no thanks to & they then accuse me of being a lesbian. Lol, I just have to laugh at their blatant insecurity.
Although I am loathe to get involved in threads like these because of how sour they can get, I gotta put my 2 cents in for Team Womanhood. First off, my condolences to these women's families and children. Secondly, I don't think that women are never the instigator, however, narcissistic men are known for pulling DARVO, so I'm always suspicious of the "She just went crazy and is an abusive psycho" story. If you look just beneath the surface there is usually a more honest picture, typically one the man isn't admitting to that involves escalating control or significant gaslighting.
In my experience, men can really be pushy and scary and it's more men than you would think. Thankfully I'm past the dating scene, but in my young adult days I had several run ins with men that I did not provoke and that left me feeling pretty pissed off and threatened. For instance, one night in college I was waiting for my friend to finish up the late shift at a local coffeeshop, and sitting on a couch in the corner reading. It was late - about 145am, so the nearby bars were letting out. A guy stumbled in and sat down at the table next to me.
A minute later I felt someone grab the top of my leg and heard a voice say, "You look like you have some sexual tension. So do I. Come out to my car and we can relieve it together." WTF!? I swiped his hand away and said, "No. GTF away from me." He actually looked a little surprised. I guess he really thought I was gonna jump up and say, "Yeah, sure!" (I do wonder if porn hasn't made certain men really stupid in this regard?) At any rate, it was creepy but I just blew it off as random drunk guy. On a side note, some people love to argue that women only dislike when ugly guys hit on them - not so, this guy could have looked like David Beckham and I would have been creeped out.
Anyway, when we were starting to leave, I looked out the window just because of a bad feeling about it and sure enough, creepy drunk dude is still pacing the sidewalk outside waiting for us to leave. We actually called one of the bars next door and the bouncers came and walked us to the car. The guy was intimidated enough to not try anything else that night, but I found out that he showed up the next day at the shop asking people about me. He then proceeded to pester people at the coffeeshop daily until word got to the owner and they banned him from the premises.
Ask any woman and she will likely have plenty of stories like mine of being stalked and harassed after clearly saying no to some random guy. People argue that it's a just a few bad apples, but some of those bad apples are murdering women over entitlement, and it needs to be addressed for what it is - violence against women simply because they are women. It makes me furious that these women lost their lives and their children lost their mothers over immature men who can't take no for an answer.
I'm so sorry that happened to you! I do wonder, also, if porn has anything to do with some guys' expectations. Great post.
Quote:
Originally Posted by thefragile
I don't have a stalking story but I did date a guy on & off for about 2 months. Something was just off about him, I had this bad feeling, so I ended it for good. He started dating someone else & about a month into that, the girl wanted to break it off with him & he ended up murdering her. In her house, in front of her kids. I was in shock for a few days because that easily could've been me. The moral of the story is, listen to your intuition, it could save your life.
On a lighter note, I've been hit on by guys who I've said no thanks to & they then accuse me of being a lesbian. Lol, I just have to laugh at their blatant insecurity.
Even though nothing bad happened to you, it's still awful and I'm also sorry for you. That "what if" must have haunted you for a while, if it doesn't still. It was an "almost me, could have been me" situation for you and that's scary enough.
A memory I have from when I was younger that really sticks out because I was young (about 12) was me walking down the street in a neighboring town from my hometown where my family's business is (not a bad area by any means but definitely a couple steps down from the quality of my town), and I was heading to a store on the street corner. Two Hispanic guys, honestly probably illegal immigrants because there are a lot of them in this area, were walking down the sidewalk beside me, coming the other way, so we passed each other. They both gave me a look then one waggled his eyebrows and the other licked his lips, both while looking at me with smug looks on their faces. I was 12. I remember it to this day. I didn't walk to that store alone again for months. Some men are just disgustingly, inexcusably gross.
I'm a trans woman. As one of the few around that has lived as a man and a woman, I can attest to the fact that women get harassed. A lot. I don't feel safe walking around like I used to. I've been sexually assaulted before. Things that never happened when I lived as a man. I've had so many encounters with guys that simply will not take no for an answer. And a friend of mine was sexually assaulted the week before last because she dared to say "No."
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At any rate, it was creepy but I just blew it off as random drunk guy. On a side note, some people love to argue that women only dislike when ugly guys hit on them - not so, this guy could have looked like David Beckham and I would have been creeped out.
