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Schools often do nothing and that's part of the problem. In fact, I've read several articles where they try to control the victim knowing they cannot control the bully.
I'm not the litigious type, but I hope this woman sues the school, the school district, everyone she complained to, and the bully and her family.
I'm not talking about teasing, by the way, I'm all for that. Bullying isn't the same thing.
This is why any bullying complaint must be made in writing.
Location: Subconscious Syncope, USA (Northeastern US)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MPowering1
Later in the article it says the mother admitted she shoved her, so it may have been a block/shove, but you'd think it wouldn't matter given the aggression of the teen.
People have accidentally bumped into another person, only to have that person charge them with assault, so it doesn't take much for police to act on it. Whether the charge sticks is another story.
I agree.
I'm not sure the charges should stick, but it might help the frustrated mother out a bit in her situation - like, there was a reason the alleged assault of the 9th grader happened. It might also help teach the 9th grader that she shouldn't interject in situations that don't and shouldn't concern her. Learning to mind her business, and at best notifying officials while safely away from a situation, could save her life one day.
In the end, there is no denying that Mom should have kept her interactions limited to dealing with other adults. Everyone can understand her concern and frustration, but no one is allowed to act simply on impulse, no matter whether its the child or the adult.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MPowering1
To document the complaints and the schools inability to act on them. In other words, the victims family will have proof.
Maybe the mother should have gone to the bullies parent's home and confronted the idiot's parents. Schools aren't parents, they are a place to learn. The problem here is the bullies parents and no one else.
I'm not sure the charges should stick, but it might help the frustrated mother out a bit in her situation - like, there was a reason the alleged assault of the 9th grader happened. It might also help teach the 9th grader that she shouldn't interject in situations that don't and shouldn't concern her. Learning to mind her business, and at best notifying officials while safely away from a situation, could save her life one day.
In the end, there is no denying that Mom should have kept her interactions limited to dealing with other adults. Everyone can understand her concern and frustration, but no one is allowed to act simply on impulse, no matter whether its the child or the adult.
Another good point!
Thanks, but I can't take credit for it. I was just paraphrasing Ummagumma's great point.
Well if you read the story, the mom *did* physically put her hands on a minor (not the bully she had tried to confront). And that is why she is being charged.
I read the story, and it doesn't say any of that.
It says the mother put her arm out to "block" another student. It doesn't say anything about her hands or any contact of any kind, except that the daughter grabbed someone's hand to stop her from hitting her mother.
Let me give a few perspectives as a retired middle school principal.
1. Bullying is rampant in schools nowadays. Although the definition of bullying when I was a kid (in the 1950s-1960s) used to be mostly physical bullying, while today it includes all sorts of things that most of us wouldn't really call bullying. For example, I once had a parent come in to complain about bullying of her daughter. In the conference I asked the mother to explain the nature of the bullying: "My daughter didn't get an invitation to another girl's birthday party". Huh? Nevertheless, there is a lot of mean-spirited "mean girls" sort of bullying that goes on in schools today, and some of it is very cruel.
2. Teachers, counselors, and administrators cannot see or hear everything that goes on. Period. Were you ever bullied? Was it done in full view of adults? Probably not.
3. On the other hand, all too many school administrators do not take appropriate action when they are made aware of bullying. I've never understood why some try to ignore it, but some do. But others work hard at keeping bullying out of their schools, though it can be a losing battle.
4. Parents have no right to go onto school property or into a school and confront other students, whether verbally or physically. Never. No. Don't do it.
5. So what should parents do? a.) Well, if they feel they have to confront the other party, go to that child's house...I would suggest calling the other parents for a meeting...I would suggest having the meeting in a public place. b.) Complain to the school...in writing. Walk in with a written complaint... then it's on the record. If you have a conference with a counselor or administrator, write a follow-up memo summarizing what you feel was discussed in the meeting. Do this every time. If necessary, forward all such correspondence to the superintendent and/or school board. PAPER TRAILS HAVE A VERY LOUD VOICE. c.) Depending on the severity of the situation, call the police, get their advice, or even press charges. d.) Prepare yourself for hearing bad news. There are often 2 sides to every story, even with bullying. Your child may not be an angel, either. There are bullying situations that often turn out to be back-and-forth situations.
Your child will most often not want you to become involved. Get involved. Bullies don't stop until someone makes them stop.
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