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Old 03-28-2019, 02:02 AM
 
Location: U.S.A., Earth
4,426 posts, read 2,779,581 times
Reputation: 3908

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Quote:
Originally Posted by catdad7x View Post
Accidental or not, the damage is done and she can kiss her teaching career goodbye.

But there's always the porn industry to consider.
This day in age, I'm thinking she could just get another teaching job. Some places are so desperate to attract teachers due to them not being able to offer better pay, that they may "overlook" such transgressions. [shrug]


Quote:
Originally Posted by TheArchitect View Post
While someone might comment on how there are also teenage girls who would like to engage in intimate relations with a male teacher crush, those same females at age 30 looking back would say they are glad no such thing actually happened with their younger selves. A 30 year old male looking back still wishes his younger self had "gotten lucky" with the hot teacher.
One quote I heard was:
Guys regret the girls they didn't sleep with
Girls regret the guys they did sleep with
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Old 03-28-2019, 08:07 AM
 
Location: Loudon, TN
5,430 posts, read 4,592,205 times
Reputation: 18194
If this teacher were a 25 year old man and sent the same video of himself doing this to a 15 year old female student, or even a 15 year old male student, no one would be saying how they wish it were them receiving the video. Serious double standard at work on this thread.
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Old 03-28-2019, 09:08 AM
 
11,370 posts, read 6,345,655 times
Reputation: 12025
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheShadow View Post
If this teacher were a 25 year old man and sent the same video of himself doing this to a 15 year old female student, or even a 15 year old male student, no one would be saying how they wish it were them receiving the video. Serious double standard at work on this thread.
Or, what if it was a male teacher hitting on a male student. I'll bet dad wouldn't be patting the boy on the back for that one.
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Old 03-28-2019, 10:02 AM
 
Location: BFE
1,076 posts, read 306,052 times
Reputation: 3069
Quote:
Originally Posted by GhostOfAndrewJackson View Post
Let me be perfectly clear: that is not right.
There is one hell of a difference between the sexes and the impact it has.
After reading your posts, I can only conclude the needle is clearly broken off your Moral Compass.
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Old 03-28-2019, 10:48 AM
 
Location: Colorado
11,043 posts, read 6,893,390 times
Reputation: 19762
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gatopescado View Post
After reading your posts, I can only conclude the needle is clearly broken off your Moral Compass.
Seriously.

My thought response to this poster's comments was...

So in the following possible pairings:
Underage male + Grown woman
The male is not damaged, is fine and happy, the grown woman is not a predator. Not really that big a deal?
(Come on at the least it's a complete breach of professional ethics deserving of the end of her career. At LEAST.)

Underage female + Grown man
The female is a victim and the man is a predator. Damage has been done!
(Really? Even if she was willing and happy about it?)

Underage male + Grown man
The male is a victim and the grown man is a predator. Damage has been done!
(Really? Even if the youth was gay and willing and happy about it?)

So the conclusion I reach is that there is this spectrum of predator to victim where the grown men are definitely predators, the grown women cannot victimize anyone, teen girls are innocents (LOL!) and teen boys are "lucky" if having het sex with an older adult in a position of authority even, but victims if it's gay sex with an adult in a position of authority because, duh, grown men are predatory in their sexuality. Is it a predator/prey situation with grown men and women always? Doesn't matter, we aren't talking about that.

And teenage boys are "horn dogs" but teenage girls are not. Ha. Ha. So I actually WAS a teenage girl for a while, and it was easily the most sexually active time of my life, with quite a number of partners, mostly male but a few female too, and some few of them were grown men...but I was the one who aggressively pursued them. And I had no regrets, and if anyone was predatory it was likely me. See if a girl manages to get to her teenage years and is rebelling against the idea that females aren't allowed to "act like" boys, and she embraces her desires rather than pretending she has none... Oh man. Sure, the power trip of feeling desirable was a thing, it feels good to most humans to have our egos stroked like that, but the sheer physical drive was intense and distracting for me too. And from talks with other girls I knew then and women I know now (the honest ones, who aren't trying to keep up some kind of a "good girl" facade) they admit they had some pretty distracting thoughts and feelings during adolescence, too. I think it's all part of our bodies waking up to sexual maturity. It's natural and it's normal.

I had crushes on male teachers and I know I spent any number of class periods sitting there completely missing the lecture for the naughty stuff going on in my head. If I had slept with any (and I did not, the older men I had were found elsewhere) my "later regret" would only be I'd feel bad for participating in the endangerment of someone's career. And I'd judge him an idiot for doing so, too. Which is EXACTLY how I feel about the adult women teachers and the boys. And adult men teachers with boys. But if there was no willingness or consent on the part of ANY young person and they were in any manner coerced or forced, then THAT is a whole different animal, far worse. I know, I know, minors can't "give consent" but I've never seen a great deal of difference between a young person having sex with another young person or an adult...it's the other pieces of the picture that create problems like power imbalances and relationship dynamics.

It's funny. I read somewhere a story (which I have no idea if it was credible or true, so don't assume anything here) that many years ago, but still when he was an adult man, David Bowie took the virginity of some teenage girl at a party or something...a willing one... And I thought "OMG I'd have KILLED to have had Bowie be my first." I mean it would not have mattered if he was 20 years old or 60 years old, IT'S DAVID FREAKING BOWIE. That's a little similar to you guys saying, "Where was the hot teacher who was DTF when I was 15?" Except that it somehow makes me a degenerate as a female to admit that I liked sex then and I like it now, because only males are supposed to be allowed that.

Pshh.

Anyhow. Professional ethics. Your teacher, doctor, therapist...lots of people should not be taking advantage of those in their care via their jobs. And I don't buy this "it was a mistake" baloney because she should not have even had him as a possible contact on Snapchat, there is no reason for a teacher and a student to use that with each other, it's all just horrible judgment. Painfully stupid. (Hey another reason she ought not to teach kids, I prefer my kids be taught by people who aren't that stupid!)
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Old 03-28-2019, 10:49 AM
 
9,100 posts, read 2,274,033 times
Reputation: 6270
Quote:
Originally Posted by ackmondual View Post
Case in point, more than one older woman (30s to 50s) was surprised to hear that a 12yo boy (family, family of friend, what have you) wanted to have sex with their babysitters. Their sex drive can be that... prominent.



Another case in point... I was at a party, and in a group conversation, a woman in her late 30s had to drop something off at the local high school. She passed by they boys varsity swim team. They were in their speedos, and probably also had swim goggles, but nothing more. These boys would be physically fit for sure. She walked by, saw them, and confessed she thought naughty thoughts and even said "yum!" to herself.


It's the same thing if the roles were reversed... grown men see teenage girls in bikinis or skimpy swimsuits, I'd gander it'd be a bit naÔve to think none of them were attracted to that. They'd probably try to hide their erections, and if asked, they'd give the canned response of "hit on that? That's gross!" (but ask again when they're 18, different attitude). US society has us doing this as per our norms. Go to certain foreign countries, the folks there are surprised that American men giggle like school girls when they see breasts. However, they're the only ones doing so. In a place where there are topless women as far as the eye can see, no one else is acting all "weird" like they are.
Oh this most certainly happens here, all the time! I see this kind of thing all the time, a couple of our stores are near high schools and middle schools, many of the kids come in after school, its very common to see 'older guys' drooling over young girls.


A few times, Ive paid attention and watched guys faces (eyes), when a young, fairly attractive girl is in line ahead of them, 99.9% of the time, the guys will be oogling her 'behind', they are careful about it though, especially when the girl is really young! (like middle school age), but it still happens frequently. More than a few times, I felt like saying something to these guys, like.."dude seriously that girl was like 12"!!
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Old 03-28-2019, 02:07 PM
 
Location: colorado springs, CO
4,552 posts, read 2,093,790 times
Reputation: 15680
Quote:
Originally Posted by livingdaybyday View Post
She claimed that she had mistaken the student on Snapchat for someone else? O-kay.
That CAN happen; with texting & pictures, at least. Itís an ameteurís mistake but still ... it can happen. Doubt thatís what really happened here & I doubt it would hold up in court. The comments on OPs link are hysterical...

Quote:
She won't need a lawyer. She will get off on her own.
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Old 03-28-2019, 02:20 PM
 
Location: Eastern Washington
13,823 posts, read 44,084,380 times
Reputation: 12155
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheShadow View Post
If this teacher were a 25 year old man and sent the same video of himself doing this to a 15 year old female student, or even a 15 year old male student, no one would be saying how they wish it were them receiving the video. Serious double standard at work on this thread.

Well, human sexuality has some double standards, if you want to call them that, baked into its nature. For example, only females get pregnant. Other examples will occur to you.


This is one place where I am just old school. Female "predatory" sexuality can be compared to an overactive house cat. At worst annoying, usually sort of cute, at worst harmless or nearly so. Male predatory sexuality can be more like a pit bull with a bad attitude.
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Old 03-28-2019, 02:34 PM
 
1,140 posts, read 1,306,990 times
Reputation: 1054
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheShadow View Post
If this teacher were a 25 year old man and sent the same video of himself doing this to a 15 year old female student, or even a 15 year old male student, no one would be saying how they wish it were them receiving the video. Serious double standard at work on this thread.
Yeah and when men complain about women getting away with such stuff with lesser consequences, they need to realize it is mostly other men they have to thank for that. I don't think many mom's are likely to look kindly on some hussy seducing their boys.
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Old 03-28-2019, 03:52 PM
 
Location: Colorado
11,043 posts, read 6,893,390 times
Reputation: 19762
The other point that this thread seems really blind to when we talk about teenage boys versus teenage girls as victims (or less so)... The girls are maturing ahead of the boys. Girls of the same age are usually further through the physical process of puberty, they are more mature often enough in various ways, though obviously I'm not saying they are on an adult's level. Your average 15 year old girl is closer to it, than your average 15 year old boy is.

And if you think it's all harmless fun and games to a teenage boy when he gets sexually involved with someone... You aren't thinking of the fact that the kid might think he's in love, and how painful a broken heart is to a teenager... Males commit suicide way more than females do. A quick Google says that males die by it about three and a half times more frequently.

A boy in this situation might not just be getting some of the first "action" of his life, he might think he's in love. He's not all that in control of his feelings, you know? There are more ways to hurt someone, than merely the question of physical violation.
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