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Old 03-24-2019, 01:12 PM
 
Location: East Coast
2,991 posts, read 1,762,559 times
Reputation: 4389

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Quote:
Originally Posted by couch coyote View Post
I think that's a reference to the fact that some orphanages in Russia (and Romania, and other countries) simply warehouse (feed and shelter) the kids. They don't interact with them, cuddle them, teach them, play with them, love on them. There's a window in child development where kids have to experience being loved in order to learn how to love. Depriving them of this is practically a textbook way to create a psychopath (i.e., someone incapable of identifying with and caring about others).

(*Not a mental health professional here, so this is a rough approximation.)


So, so sad, any way you look at it.
It was ALL orphanages in Russia (as well as in virtually other Eastern European country). Adoptions from Russia stopped as of 2013, so while yes, this child had immense trauma, he had been in the home for a minimum of over 6 years. They should have been seeking help for him.
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Old 03-24-2019, 01:37 PM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
11,039 posts, read 19,795,777 times
Reputation: 25969
It's a terrible shame that it happened.

If this kid was going to shoot someone, it's probably better that he shot the people who granted him access to the gun than classmates (if he had gone to a regular school). I know that sounds heartless, but if you own weapons, you need to have a way to secure them so your children don't have access.
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Old 03-24-2019, 05:29 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
76,032 posts, read 67,909,226 times
Reputation: 73219
Quote:
Originally Posted by couch coyote View Post
I think that's a reference to the fact that some orphanages in Russia (and Romania, and other countries) simply warehouse (feed and shelter) the kids. They don't interact with them, cuddle them, teach them, play with them, love on them. There's a window in child development where kids have to experience being loved in order to learn how to love. Depriving them of this is practically a textbook way to create a psychopath (i.e., someone incapable of identifying with and caring about others).

(*Not a mental health professional here, so this is a rough approximation.)


So, so sad, any way you look at it.
That's not true of all orphanages in Russia. Not all are underfunded. The issue is, that even though the teachers and other staff may be kind and caring, some of the children come from extreme home situations. Russia isn't equipped to provide psychiatric or psycho-therapeutic care for traumatized kids, or for anyone, for that matter.

That's the issue, not the rumored warehousing of kids, which was more of a Romanian thing. There are some very good orphanages in Russia, along with some underfunded, probably understaffed ones.
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Old Yesterday, 07:59 AM
 
1,107 posts, read 516,170 times
Reputation: 3439
Quote:
Originally Posted by fluffythewondercat View Post
I think the key is in the phrase, "Adopted from Russia..."
Terrible thing to say. How many children from this country have done unspeakable acts. I know two couples who have adopted children from Russia, and they are wonderful children, who have grown into very productive adults. Their parents would not give them up for the world.
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Old Yesterday, 08:03 AM
 
272 posts, read 89,670 times
Reputation: 385
This kid should have been out with kids at school and loved at home and guaranteed this would not happen, period. I hate home-schooling, all it does is isolate a child, IMO it's sick..
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Old Yesterday, 08:12 AM
 
5,489 posts, read 1,947,541 times
Reputation: 12901
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovemyfl View Post
This kid should have been out with kids at school and loved at home and guaranteed this would not happen, period. I hate home-schooling, all it does is isolate a child, IMO it's sick..
No, you can't guarantee. And no, there's more to it than isolating children. Plenty of parents homeschool their kids, but they have a coalition so-to-speak, of homeschool families that meet up and do things together, go on field trips, do sports related activities, and so on and so forth.


You must've had bad experiences with homeschooling?
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Old Yesterday, 08:29 AM
 
Location: State of Transition
76,032 posts, read 67,909,226 times
Reputation: 73219
Quote:
Originally Posted by fluffythewondercat View Post
The couple had an assortment of armaments and apparently no gun safe.
If this is true, they shouldn't have been approved to adopt. Whatever authority approved them shares the blame for this; whatever social worker or whoever it was that did a home visit to approve the parents should be dragged into court. This is outrageous!

Oh, but they're such a sweet, gentle couple, dontcha know? Their church members testified as to how wonderful they were. If they were so wonderful, why did they need a gun collection? I hope the LE can find out from the oldest child, their bio child, what provoked this incident, and what was really going on in the home.
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Old Yesterday, 09:25 AM
 
5,489 posts, read 1,947,541 times
Reputation: 12901
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovemyfl View Post
This kid should have been out with kids at school and loved at home and guaranteed this would not happen, period. I hate home-schooling, all it does is isolate a child, IMO it's sick..

And these kids weren't isolated. The family was very involved in their community, and church, and the daughter played soccer and the whole family would attend the games. People saw them out and about all the time.
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Old Yesterday, 09:49 AM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ <-> Silicon Valley, CA
6,596 posts, read 4,067,276 times
Reputation: 24278
Quote:
Originally Posted by marcandme View Post
Terrible thing to say. How many children from this country have done unspeakable acts. I know two couples who have adopted children from Russia, and they are wonderful children, who have grown into very productive adults. Their parents would not give them up for the world.

I'm sure that's exactly what these parents told people, how wonderful their adopted children were. Right up to the point where a child fired a bullet into each of their brains.
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Old Yesterday, 09:58 AM
 
19,291 posts, read 15,898,671 times
Reputation: 36301
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
If this is true, they shouldn't have been approved to adopt. Whatever authority approved them shares the blame for this; whatever social worker or whoever it was that did a home visit to approve the parents should be dragged into court. This is outrageous!

Oh, but they're such a sweet, gentle couple, dontcha know? Their church members testified as to how wonderful they were. If they were so wonderful, why did they need a gun collection? I hope the LE can find out from the oldest child, their bio child, what provoked this incident, and what was really going on in the home.

I don't think it sounds like a lot of guns for New Hampshire. New Hampshire is a popular hunting and gun state, in fact it's tied for the number one state for gun ownership. I would bet 4 guns in the household is a low number for those who own guns there. Per the article they had: "two Kel-Tec P-3AT handguns; a .22-caliber rifle; and a 12-gauge shotgun.". I didn't see anything in this article about where they kept them.


By all accounts they sound like a very social, loving family very involved in sports together and other community endeavors. I hope people reserve judgement until facts are in, but right now there is no reason to believe they weren't good parents. The kids don't sound like they were isolated in the slightest.
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