Young college grad wondering if I should stay in Dallas (Point: sales, apartment)

[hazergore1198]

I've got a bachelor's in computer science from UTD, and wondering what to do with my life. I've lived in Dallas all my life (born and raised here), but I'm just not happy here.

I couldn't stand a typical 9-5 work day, commuting 45 minutes each way in stressful traffic, and yet that seems typical here. It would be nice to work for 12 hours Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, and then just be done for the week. Don't know how feasible that is. I live off of about 25k a year right now, and I'm sure 40k a year would be way more than I'd ever need. Don't ever want children.

I hate the traffic here. I hate how crowded it is here, and how everyone is always in a hurry. Neighbors never talk to one another. Every time I've tried to get to know my neighbors, they've given me the whole "Too busy to talk to you, go away" thing. People here are so busy, that they lead hollow, superficial lives. Rarely do people actually spend lots of time on hobbies, reading books, or spending quality time with friends and family. It's Get up at 6, get out the door at 7, commute for an hour, get back home at 6, take the kids to soccer practice, go grocery shopping and pay bills, then go to bed, only to do it all over again the next day! The thought of such a lifestyle makes me ill. I'm a very slow paced person. I wish I could just live in a small town or out in the country, but there are no career opportunities for me out there.

Which leads me to my next complaint... it seems impossible to get a job in my career. Nobody wants to hire a computer programmer with no previous experience. Most of my friends from UTD seem to be having the same problem finding a job. One of them is now in a homeless shelter of sorts, because he couldn't find a real job (one requiring a college degree), and all the places like retail and customer service wouldn't hire him because he's overqualified.

The prospects for single males my age is also abysmal here. I never had a problem finding girlfriends in highschool, but as soon as I got to UTD, things changed. All the girls from highschool left Dallas to go to college elsewhere, while the few of us that stayed were all males who ended up going to UTD. If anyone knows anything about UTD, there are virtually no single girls who aren't overweight or foreign. The male to female ratio is so high that it ensures there are hordes of desperate, lonely guys. The prospects outside of UTD don't seem that great, either. There are some single women in the 24-30 range, but that's too old for me. Quality single women around here in the 18-24 range? Almost nonexistent. Maybe it's because we're all a bunch of computer science geeks (though I'm actually athletic too), but neither I nor anyone from my circle of friends has ever had a girlfriend since highschool, or since moving here to Dallas. Actually, I don't even know any male my age around here with a girlfriend. It's pathetic. There's lots of trashy girls at bars, sure, but no smart, nice, attractive girls who are also single.

So that is my long rant. I hate the fast paced yuppie lifestyle in the DFW area, but don't know where else to go to find a job as a computer science major. The singles scene for males aged 18-24 is horrible.

[lpepping]

Have you thought about a career in consulting at places like Accenture, Bearing Point, etc? It is very fast paced and travel is typically required but they do hire newly graduated people without previous experience(just good grades) and you learn a lot in short amount of time.

[FarNorthDallas]

You are too young to be having this mid life crises, but, hey, I hear you. The job thing is tough. Have you thought about getting a job overseas like in Dubai? Dubai - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

You might also look at Exxon Mobile's opportunities overseas (or some other company). It might be the radical change you need to get you out of this slump.

[hazergore1198]

I'll look into places like Accenture, Bearing Point. Even if it's fast paced and stressful, if it's the only way to get my foot in the door in the software development industry, I'll take it until I can find another job that's more low key. A friend of mine works for a small software company, and he basically works his own hours. He's only required to get his work done, and be there for the meetings! Sounds like heaven.

Working overseas would interest me, but that would be too scary to do by myself. If I was married, I would consider it much more, as then I'd have someone to go with me.

[momof2dfw]

Originally Posted by FarNorthDallas

You are too young to be having this mid life crises, but, hey, I hear you. The job thing is tough. Have you thought about getting a job overseas like in Dubai? Dubai - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

You might also look at Exxon Mobile's opportunities overseas (or some other company). It might be the radical change you need to get you out of this slump.

Except, that might not help the girlfriend situation. He for sure would not find a girlfriend or even girls to hangout w/ in those places. I'm guessing you live near UTD or still at home? If so then I'd say find some job, anything. Is there something that you would even do for less pay that would be a job that would be temporary but give you the chance to say at least you did it? Do these kinds of things while your young and not tied down. Say work for a city in the parks & rec department (you did say your athletic). Or even a non-profit agency but in a paid position if there is something along those lines that kind of tugs at your heart. What about even w/ some of the local sports teams or affiliations? Something in sales for season tickets or something. Most of the people that tend to be in those positions are in their 20's. After you find a job then look for a place to live that is around more people like you and in your age bracket. Living even in an apartment in the suburbs is not going to be the best spot to meet others your age and single. Since you are athletic what about joining a sports team. Soccer abounds all over the metroplex and adult leagues are VERY popular. Or whatever sport it is you enjoy doing. The cost on these is minimium and much less than joining a gym and gives MUCH more social interaction.

If you don't mind a job say out of the country why not check out some of the hotels and resorts in a place you would like to stay for an extended period of time. The possibilities on this are endless.

The Dallas area does afford an abundance of opportunities for young people to excel in their careers and afford a nice lifestyle. I would not throw it out of the picture just yet. I don't know how much traveling you have done but trust me, the traffic, congestion, friendliness and such is much better here than many other cities of the same size. Job prospects are also going to be better here than many other places. If you and your group of friends are having difficulty finding jobs maybe there is something that together as a group you can put your heads and knowledge to work and start something up. Any pursuits outside of the box of computer programming even that might be of interest? Always thought of running a certain type of business or have a great idea? Dallas is the place to make those kinds of things a reality.

[lh_newbie]

Originally Posted by hazergore1198

I'll look into places like Accenture, Bearing Point. Even if it's fast paced and stressful, if it's the only way to get my foot in the door in the software development industry, I'll take it until I can find another job that's more low key. A friend of mine works for a small software company, and he basically works his own hours. He's only required to get his work done, and be there for the meetings! Sounds like heaven.

First off, your friend's job is a rarity in the IT field. If you want a low key job, you picked the wrong industry. This field is kill or be killed. Although you state you only want $40K, so that may be possible to get a flexible job with such a low salary requirement. Most developers I know are $80-100K+.

[carlinagirlntx]

This would be probably be out of your field but have you looked for employement with the federal government? If work hours are #1 on your list then the flex plan they have would work for you. It actually 10 hours 5 days a week with one day of your choice off per 2 week period. A lot work an extra 30 minutes to hour and use the extra time for credit time off in addition to the mandatory one day a week off. so they end up working four days a week. More than likely there are no IT federal jobs in the DFW area. The ones i know of are actually contract and they do not allow flex time usage.

[aogaeru]

Yikes man... You're depressing me seeing as how I'll be moving to DFW area shortly. I understand how you feel, I felt like it after graduation too. I agree with the poster who said to go abroad. Its a great way to travel, save, refresh yourself and see your old surroundings in a new light. I have lived in Florida most of my life but after Uni, I couldnt take it here for all the reasons you hate Dallas. I spent 2 yrs in Japan and met heaps of people from different countries, traveled SE Asia, saved and refreshed myself until the next step became clear. Along the way I got some great experience and learned tons of great useful stuff for my job and life.

I just got back to Florida and I LOVE it now. Its different, its nice, meeting people isnt hard etc... Heres hoping Dallas is good to me too! Either way, anywhere is what you make of it. Dallas, Japan, Florida, Dubai, nowhere will give you happiness, you gotta give it to yourself. Maybe taking a step away will help you see it in a different light.

As for IT jobs... it is a bit hard at first, but I have alot of friends in Orlando with IT degrees and jobs. IT is big in Orlando. Take a look. Its smaller than Dallas and if you want slow, drive out to the beach and go shark fishing.

[momof2dfw]

" if you want slow, drive out to the beach and go shark fishing. "

You call that "slow"??? That would make my heart race faster than being in any major traffic tie-up in Dallas. lol

[aogaeru]

Originally Posted by momof2dfw

" if you want slow, drive out to the beach and go shark fishing. "

You call that "slow"??? That would make my heart race faster than being in any major traffic tie-up in Dallas. lol

hahaha. ...or fishing for fish off the pier. Nah, shark fishing is fun! My first time fishing was shark fishing. Pay for a spot on a nice sized boat that includes food, bait, pole and big burley dudes helping you out. iIf you catch a shark, the big burley dude wrestles it, not you. Then you take it home. YUMMY! hahaha. (they are small bottom feeding sharks, not great white! hahaha)