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Old 01-24-2012, 03:39 AM
 
Location: Texas
42,453 posts, read 50,338,669 times
Reputation: 67680

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Quote:
Originally Posted by TurtleCreek80 View Post
Seriously? It's a dentist. I couldn't tell you what my dentist's political/civil rights/moral/religious beliefs are. We don't get to talk much while his hands are in my mouth
Triple agree.
And I'm gay.

 
Old 01-24-2012, 07:01 AM
 
Location: Dallas, TX
5,681 posts, read 9,734,612 times
Reputation: 1889
I don't think the OP meant anything snarky about "regular" dentists here. Maybe just looking for a little reassurance...(?)
 
Old 01-24-2012, 08:13 AM
 
653 posts, read 706,679 times
Reputation: 408
Quote:
Originally Posted by stan4 View Post
Triple agree.
And I'm gay.
I fourth that. Not to being gay, but to having it not come up. How could it? Your mouth is full of hands and devices. Also, I have dentists in the family. They could care less who or what you are. It's their job to do their job. That's it.

Now go get those teeth cleaned! (Just don't mention to your dentist that you're a vegetarian. Dentists HATE vegetarians )

Yes, that was a joke.
 
Old 01-25-2012, 10:26 PM
 
3 posts, read 6,181 times
Reputation: 14
Oh shush.

The foundation of any dentist-patient relationship is trust, because dental work is complicated and a nerve-wracking affair for many people. And in order to make sure you're getting the best treatment, you want a dentist who can make you feel comfortable and relaxed, which makes the dentist relax while he's poking around inside your mouth with pointy objects. It's all about getting the best possible care.

Another part of building trust is going back. It means getting to know your dentist and vice-versa. "How's your husband/wife?" etc. There are far too many homophobic people out there -- and in the medical professions -- especially in Bible Belt metropoles like Dallas, for you all to poo-poo it like it's not worth worrying about.

Anyways, here's a study on HIV patient discrimination by dentists, last month:

http://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.ed...e-Dec-2011.pdf
 
Old 01-25-2012, 10:31 PM
 
Location: United State of Texas
1,708 posts, read 5,303,434 times
Reputation: 2096
Quote:
Originally Posted by TurtleCreek80 View Post
Seriously? It's a dentist. I couldn't tell you what my dentist's political/civil rights/moral/religious beliefs are. We don't get to talk much while his hands are in my mouth
Total agreement.

First response of thread should have ended it.
 
Old 01-26-2012, 08:49 AM
 
653 posts, read 706,679 times
Reputation: 408
Quote:
Originally Posted by DMZ3 View Post
Oh shush.

The foundation of any dentist-patient relationship is trust, because dental work is complicated and a nerve-wracking affair for many people. And in order to make sure you're getting the best treatment, you want a dentist who can make you feel comfortable and relaxed, which makes the dentist relax while he's poking around inside your mouth with pointy objects. It's all about getting the best possible care.

Another part of building trust is going back. It means getting to know your dentist and vice-versa. "How's your husband/wife?" etc. There are far too many homophobic people out there -- and in the medical professions -- especially in Bible Belt metropoles like Dallas, for you all to poo-poo it like it's not worth worrying about.

Anyways, here's a study on HIV patient discrimination by dentists, last month:

http://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.ed...e-Dec-2011.pdf
No one is saying you have to disclose anything you're not comfortable with sharing with your dentist. Period. Your sexual preference has very little, if any, impact on a dentist's ability to provide adequate care (as it would impact, say, your gynecologist or PCP). That's the point I believe most of us are trying to make.

I had an eating disorder for 13 years (I feel comfortable mentioning it now because I've overcome it). That IS something that should be disclosed to a dentist since it can impact their care, but when I was "ill" with it, I still did not tell my dentist because I was not comfortable sharing that information. I trusted that he would care for my teeth, and tell me if I'd given myself cavities, oral cancer, etc. either way, had I shared that part of my life with him or not.

What we decide to tell our dentists, whether it affects their ability to do their job or not, is a personal decision. When something doesn't affect their ability to do their job, why worry about even telling them in the first place? We're not belittling the OP. We're simply telling them not to fret, and if they're uncomfortable with the topic, simply don't bring it up.

Last edited by dclamb3; 01-26-2012 at 09:00 AM..
 
Old 01-26-2012, 09:38 AM
 
Location: Junius Heights
1,245 posts, read 2,954,486 times
Reputation: 910
Quote:
Originally Posted by dclamb3 View Post
What we decide to tell our dentists, whether it affects their ability to do their job or not, is a personal decision. When something doesn't affect their ability to do their job, why worry about even telling them in the first place? We're not belittling the OP. We're simply telling them not to fret, and if they're uncomfortable with the topic, simply don't bring it up.
Without knowing everything, I don't think we can just say "don't bring it up." Do they have insurance through a company that offers domestic partnerships? If so it will become obvious when 40 year old Fred Schwarz has insurance where the primary is listed as John Schmidt. Also you can not bring something like that up, but I know my dentist asks after my wife and son. If I were gay, I can imagine not wanting to be in the position where I either a:am honest and risk offending the guy with a scalpel and drill in my mouth, B:have to lie to my dentist, and maintain that lie every time I come in, or C: have to tell him i don't wish to discuss my private life, and come of as some weird closed off jerk. I can also understand simply not wanting to regularly hand over big amounts of cash to someone who might dislike you based upon your sexual orientation. I am a big fan of voting by pocketbook.

The big movement a few years ago for GLBT's to patronize only GLBT service providers and business bothered me, as it would if straights did that, or white, or blacks, or Baptists, or Catholics or any other group, but I can see many reasons for not wanting a dentist who could be outright hostile towards you if you show them your insurance car, or answer a simple pleasant inquiry about your family honestly.
 
Old 01-26-2012, 10:32 AM
 
653 posts, read 706,679 times
Reputation: 408
Quote:
Originally Posted by Macbeth2003 View Post
Without knowing everything, I don't think we can just say "don't bring it up." Do they have insurance through a company that offers domestic partnerships? If so it will become obvious when 40 year old Fred Schwarz has insurance where the primary is listed as John Schmidt. Also you can not bring something like that up, but I know my dentist asks after my wife and son. If I were gay, I can imagine not wanting to be in the position where I either a:am honest and risk offending the guy with a scalpel and drill in my mouth, B:have to lie to my dentist, and maintain that lie every time I come in, or C: have to tell him i don't wish to discuss my private life, and come of as some weird closed off jerk. I can also understand simply not wanting to regularly hand over big amounts of cash to someone who might dislike you based upon your sexual orientation. I am a big fan of voting by pocketbook.

The big movement a few years ago for GLBT's to patronize only GLBT service providers and business bothered me, as it would if straights did that, or white, or blacks, or Baptists, or Catholics or any other group, but I can see many reasons for not wanting a dentist who could be outright hostile towards you if you show them your insurance car, or answer a simple pleasant inquiry about your family honestly.
All very good points! I hadn't thought of that.
 
Old 01-26-2012, 10:41 AM
 
Location: Texas
42,453 posts, read 50,338,669 times
Reputation: 67680
Quote:
Originally Posted by DMZ3 View Post
. There are far too many homophobic people out there -- and in the medical professions -- especially in Bible Belt metropoles like Dallas, for you all to poo-poo it like it's not worth worrying about.

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Hey, thanks for the blatantly anti-Dallas statement. Which I can tell you, after 23 years of living here, is patently untrue. I grew up and live in what is considered a very affluent and conservative part of town, and my neighbors don't care, my vet doesn't care, my pcp doesn't care, my coworkers don't care, my ob doesn't care, my accountant doesn't care, my yard guy doesn't care, my maid doesn't care, my nanny/dogsitter doesn't care, my trainer doesn't care, and my dentist (of 23 years) not only doesn't care but came to my college graduation party, my med school graduation party, and my baby shower (as did many of the other people listed).

And I didn't go searching for 'gay friendly' anything...I was just myself and try to find the best person for whatever job I wanted done.

This is a great place for all sorts of people to live and I won't have random ignorant people malign it. I am getting so sick of that.
 
Old 01-26-2012, 12:59 PM
 
Location: Mostly in my head
19,687 posts, read 53,974,095 times
Reputation: 18702
This thread has run its course and is now closed.
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