Live in San Diego, Considering Moving To Dallas Money Not A Problem? Am I Crazy? (Santa Fe: fit in, how much)

[timaay]

Hoping to get some advice and real world perspectives about whether this is a good idea or not. In my early 40's, wife and 2 toddlers living in san diego. We own our own business and do pretty well. Have a beautiful 2.5 acre estate with great views, infinity edge swimming pool in a high end double gated community (community is gated and we have private gate to our estate as well). Great schools.

Here's the thing... we just sold the business and can now live anywhere we want and really considering moving.

For some reason we just want to get out of San Diego. I've read about a lot of people wanting to move to the DFW area but seems as it's mostly for lower cost of living, etc... Is there any other reason to move there?

Reasons why we are starting to not like san diego. We are very conservative and there are a lot of liberals out here that are very outspoken. I don't mind different viewpoints, etc... but liberals here are very outspoken, and in my opinion rude and opinionated. I just don't want my kids to grow up being influenced in this way. Again, don't mind opposing view points but it's a little out of control in California. San diego itself is said to be a conservative area due largely to the big military population but again the liberal/democratic voices are still just very loud. We would go to play groups, etc.. and hear other families say how they don't want to influence their 1 or 2 year old to identify as a boy or girl they want to let them figure it out on their own, etc... ! Gender neutral, on and on... Don't like the legalized marijuana, hate that grocery bags are paid for now, don't like that the city voted to let the chargers leave. You get the point, seems everything that happens in this area lately we disagree with. we just don't agree or want our children to grow up being heavily influenced by things that we don't think fit our values. Want to be around more like minded people.

On the flip side of that is that aesthetically this area is absolutely gorgeous. Beaches, mountains, weather, parks, trails, etc... It's primarily the people we are having issues with. It's like a bad thing to be conservative church going people with family values... you have to keep that quiet or else be talked down on.

Overall hope i've given you a decent background on our situation and what we are looking for. Am i crazy for wanting to move out of San Diego when we 'seemingly' have it all here? How would say the Vaquero neighborhood in Westlake compare to Rancho Santa Fe or Santa Luz here in San Diego?

Open to all thoughts and comments. Thanks for reading.

[WorldKlas]

Your research should have told you the weather in Dallas is really humid, so that and the general blandness of the terrain should not be new information for you. I love San Diego but did experience some general distain for the culture. Seemed to me so many people are on some kind of govt. handout.....

We love to hike, so Dallas is a big fail in that regard. However, in general the public schools are good, the housing prices are good, the vibe is great, the politics are not CA crazy, the people are nice. Its a livable city but most people choose Dallas because of the economic environment.

Have you considered Colorado or N. Virginia?

[calgirlinnc]

You are not crazy for wanting to provide an environment for your children that aligns more closely with your values. The fact that you are willing to leave an otherwise comfortable lifestyle to do so is commendable, IMO.

I grew up in Southern OC and went to college in L.A. and I too left California...and have now been in the south for over 25 years. I will tell you, that no matter where you move (unless it is to Hawaii) you will have difficulty adjusting to the weather. You will adjust, but the first 2 years will be hard. Everyone I know who has left California has to go through this. My SIL grew up in Dana Point and lived there until she moved to Virginia at the age of 35 to marry my brother. She hated the weather so much they almost got divorced.

Out of curiosity, why Dallas? Have you considered anywhere else? Most places in the South are conservative....for example, you could easily afford something on the beach outside Charleston, SC. Many posters on this board will tell you to avoid DFW at all costs (we are moving there next month from NC, but that is where the job is)...but maybe it would be helpful to know why you are looking there.

Every place you live will have tradeoffs...what are you willing to give up for what you hope to gain?

[TurtleCreek80]

How much would you miss the beach/ outdoorsy lifestyle? The moderate climate? Are you the type of family that is out hiking, biking, building sand castles, etc every weekend or do you mostly hang in your backyard and use your pool? I can understand your social/political desire to find a better fit but you absolutely will not be able to replicate a Cali coastal active lifestyle here.

If you enjoy hanging in your backyard, I'm sure you would fit in living in one of Dallas' many affluent suburbs- good schools, relatively conservative politics, etc. If you want the best of both worlds, I'd encourage you to look elsewhere....maybe Nashville / Knoxville, Charlotte, Louisville, etc. All have more temperate climates and a lot more natural beauty than the flat plains of DFW, while still being in the Bible Belt (and probably more conservative than multicultural DFW is heading).

Economic opportunities and cost of living are the two main drivers of people moving to DFW. Since neither is a driver for you, I'd maybe come for a visit but also expand your net to look elsewhere.

[Backliteyes]

Originally Posted by TurtleCreek80

Economic opportunities and cost of living are the two main drivers of people moving to DFW. Since neither is a driver for you, I'd maybe come for a visit but also expand your net to look elsewhere.

I strongly agree with this. You did not at all mention needing or wanting to find a job, so if you sold the business and are now independently wealthy and won't need to work, the world is open to you. If that were my situation I'd be in a beautiful place next to beautiful beaches or beautiful mountains or whatever your inclination is, not the flat plains of Dallas that will feel cold in the winter and hot in the summer coming from San Diego.

There are an endless list of places that are not as liberal/outspoken as California if that's all you're looking to get away from. If you don't need to be in a big city you might consider many smaller cities or towns across the nation as well.

Good luck, it's not an easy decision to make at all and requires a lot of research!

[hbdwihdh378y9]

Originally Posted by WorldKlas

Your research should have told you the weather in Dallas is really humid....

Unlikely that research would have turned up false information like that.

[timaay]

Thanks all, very helpful. To provide a little more info...

I guess to answer the 'why dallas' question... Like i said THE most important element of our lives is raising good kids and turning them into respectful honest hard working adults (like most parents i guess). We worry that this socal is not ideal for that. Of course some would chime in and disagree and others would say that no matter where you are you'll never isolate your kids from bad behavior. I agree. We just want to put them in the best family friendly environment possible to stack the deck in best odds of getting them to be quality people. That's really the crux of our decision.

So further about why Dallas? I guess we have fallen for the 'branding' of Texas so to speak. Family values, everything bigger (LOL), etc... theme parks, can get on cruise ships easy, short flight to caribbean, ...and Dallas area seems to be one of the best in the state. North Texas has good access to the rest of the country, east coast and west as well as up middle America.

For us it checks alot of boxes. Regarding employment... i'm in my early 40's and while we are financially independent I wouldn't just do nothing the rest of my life. Will want to start another business and have access to talent that a large area like DFW can provide. Also we are thinking about after the kids grow up we want to live in an area where they would like to stay in versus a small town in the country they will most likely try to move out and live in a big city... trying to think through all of these elements.

Agree, the weather may be the hardest part but we do enjoy really hot weather and often complain that San Diego is too cold, LOL.

We definitely will plan to visit and get a feel for it. With all of this being said now I would really appreciate your opinions/comments about whether or not our perceptions of Dallas are accurate?

thank you.

[Hacker1234]

There is nothing to do in Dallas, you will miss California.

[Katana49]

Originally Posted by timaay

Reasons why we are starting to not like san diego. We are very conservative and there are a lot of liberals out here that are very outspoken. I don't mind different viewpoints, etc... but liberals here are very outspoken, and in my opinion rude and opinionated. I just don't want my kids to grow up being influenced in this way. Again, don't mind opposing view points but it's a little out of control in California. San diego itself is said to be a conservative area due largely to the big military population but again the liberal/democratic voices are still just very loud. We would go to play groups, etc.. and hear other families say how they don't want to influence their 1 or 2 year old to identify as a boy or girl they want to let them figure it out on their own, etc... ! Gender neutral, on and on... Don't like the legalized marijuana, hate that grocery bags are paid for now, don't like that the city voted to let the chargers leave. You get the point, seems everything that happens in this area lately we disagree with. we just don't agree or want our children to grow up being heavily influenced by things that we don't think fit our values. Want to be around more like minded people.

Well, the number of people moving here from California is increasing every day. I'll also say that unless you live somewhere that is pretty rural, you will have plenty of "liberals" to keep you company here.

I put liberal in quotations because it's a somewhat fair assessment to say that a Texas Democrat is a Republican anywhere else.

Overall though, we're becoming very diverse here. Large numbers of Asian and Indian families have been moving in for years, as well as the growing Hispanic population. TX demographics is shifting to the left politically, so if that bothers you, you may be better suited to Oklahoma or something where you can still get a lot of bang for your buck like DFW offers, but is more conservative. Or, you may want to live more towards the Ft. Worth side of the metroplex.

[cordata]

Originally Posted by timaay

Thanks all, very helpful. To provide a little more info...

I guess to answer the 'why dallas' question... Like i said THE most important element of our lives is raising good kids and turning them into respectful honest hard working adults (like most parents i guess). We worry that this socal is not ideal for that. Of course some would chime in and disagree and others would say that no matter where you are you'll never isolate your kids from bad behavior. I agree. We just want to put them in the best family friendly environment possible to stack the deck in best odds of getting them to be quality people. That's really the crux of our decision.

I don't think that "liberals" will teach your kids bad behavior. If you are worried about their being around undesirables the easiest way to prevent this is to send them to private school. Have you looked in to private schools in San Diego?