U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > Delaware
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
Old 09-08-2009, 06:27 AM
Location: Delaware
388 posts, read 849,814 times
Reputation: 348


Good morning,

If you could ask one question at a 55+ community that couldn't be answered in their brochure, what would it be?

Hubby and I are leaving next week for DE and several visits to 55+ communities. We have our appointments made, our brochures in hand, a camera, and 2 pages of yellow legal pad paper full of questions. Many were a result of reading the long 55+ community thread. Thank you to everyone for your insights - all were valuable (in one way or another).

So, please, help me add questions to my list. When we return, I will post our impressions of the places we have visited.

Remember: there is no stupid question!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

Old 09-08-2009, 07:15 AM
Location: Sunshine N'Blue Skies
13,320 posts, read 20,101,684 times
Reputation: 11645
I think my question to each place would always be..............
How long can my grandchildren stay with us per year? In that same frame of mind... I would ask.......Could my daughters come and stay there on their own, and for how long? Since they have
always vacationed in a home we would own out of state.
I know a 55+ community is exactly that! Limits on my" little visitors" though would just not appeal to me and hubby. Happy house hunting. Delaware is a wonderful state!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 09-08-2009, 08:01 AM
Location: Kirkwood, DE and beautiful SXM!
12,054 posts, read 20,201,563 times
Reputation: 31756
Some of the questions that I would ask: Is there some type of transportation if I am not able to drive; even though I have three young children who would visit, I don't want any children monopolizing the pool--are there any limits?; Indoor pool? Is there a doctor on call for the development; what types of programs are offered--college courses, exercise, crafts, trips; Can you have a fence surrounding your yard? Pets?; Fees? How is the board of directors (or whoever makes the rules) elected? Public transportation?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 09-08-2009, 08:11 AM
16,199 posts, read 10,546,753 times
Reputation: 28844
there are as many different questions as individuals and you have to know what is important in your life.

The main questions for us was are Pets allowed and also fees, Doctors and activities.

I have know people in 55+ communities and already knew of some of the rules. We had no problem with this.

You have to know WHY you want to move to an age resticted community.

At our age...we didn't want to have to deal with kids and monolpolizing the pool every day. That is why we chose this type of living. But if you like being around kids with no restrictions..then you don't want this type of living. It's really very simple.

Little Eggplant....sound to me like you have most of your ducks in row.

Good luck to ya!!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 09-08-2009, 08:19 AM
Location: Sierra Vista, AZ
16,134 posts, read 20,767,260 times
Reputation: 8292
Some of my experiences with 55+

They whined and moaned whenever children used the pool

They snooped at your lawn and yard looking for violations

In one case a residents daughter and son in law were killed in an accident and the grandchildren were staying with their granparents. The HOA forced them to move out.

The "Republican Club" took over the HOA and tried to force out anyone who didn't follow them.

I will NEVER move to another 55+ Community
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 09-08-2009, 10:30 AM
Location: Sunshine N'Blue Skies
13,320 posts, read 20,101,684 times
Reputation: 11645
Little Eggplant.......You asked for one question......So I chose the most important one for me and that was the children.

I have lived in an "all age" HOA community so I know many of the usual rules. Many are the same in a 55+ except that the 55+ has additional guest, and children rules. I lived there eight years.

I haven't found a 55+ community anywhere that forbid dogs or a cat or two, so if that is something on your mind. I think you will have no issue there. Except the usual rules concerning clean up of pets.
I know in the all age community many did look around for violations. Expect not to have any of those or most likely you will be turned into the "board." Fines are given out in most cases after a few warnings.
I would never, as Boompa states in a particular case........want to have to move out due to a family emergency. Or in that case, with a tragedy circumstance....
I have read about this type of incident happening before.

In the winters we stay at an all age community in SC. I really like having the teens and children around. People do check on if you are outside with your pet though........
One time we were turned in, for being just inside the glass door while our pet was tied out........
It was a downpour, and the pups trip was a mere minute.......But the dreaded phone calls began.
Someone turned us in.........Security showed up within the next minute.
It really was laughable to us......... But, crabby people with nothing much to do with their time ...spend time looking to complain. LOL
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 09-08-2009, 11:50 AM
Location: Lakeland, Florida
6,953 posts, read 12,437,937 times
Reputation: 8630
Well after all the rules were explained to me I would want to know this. I would want to know just what Active Retirement meant to the community. I would ask this because these communities are not for every retired person, and actually can be quite expensive.

From people I have met that either lived in them or have lived I have learned alot. People that have lived in Fla and Ariz mainly. I got more info from them, than I would get from the management of the communites. Of course they are trying to sell property.

Some people liked the fact there are all these planned activities, and people in the same age groups. They didn't have to deal with children and alot of noise. They felt safer living in a community, and if they had good neighbors, help when needed. I can understand all those factors.

What was not appealing to people were all the rules. The ones pertaining to visits by relatives, or at the pool. Also about rules pertaining to thier property. Several told me they simply could not stand all the gossip in these type settings, and so many people with really no life. They moved when they could sell. It wasn't always easy to sell and that bothered them.

So for those that are interested in 55+ settings they really should ask alot of questions. Mainly asked to people that live in them or have lived in them.

So maybe the one question should be after the rules are explained, would be the one we ask ourselves. Can I live in this type setting after I write my pro's and con's list. For me I cannot, but some may find a 55+ setting works just fine. Its all about personal preference.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 09-08-2009, 02:15 PM
5,819 posts, read 13,274,889 times
Reputation: 9276
Several friends moved into a 55+ and were not happy. The rules, the gossip, and the biggest problem was the cliques of women. It was like being in junior high. and then there were the RULES....people spying on one another and reporting each other. Not for us!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 09-08-2009, 03:46 PM
16,199 posts, read 10,546,753 times
Reputation: 28844
wow.........a lot of great input. Seems to be a hot topic.

everything posted is true Gossip, cliques, complaints and a host of trouble.

I thought when I retired....I'f be free of the gossipie stuff. When I worked, with all ages, gossip flew like wild fire every day. I would say to myself........do people ever out grow acting like children???

Guess not?

People are people and I'm sure all communities and neighborhoods experience this type of thing.

But in a 55+.......most of us are retired involved in community activities on pretty much a daily basis.
Its the joke around here when a story starts it never ends up anything like when it was first told.

If you love having kids around......don't move in a 55+ community cuz there will be complaints if too many become annoying. Call it the land of crab apples or whatever you want but we like it quiet and calm especially in the pool. That is what we pay for.
So if this is NOT for you.......then do not move to a 55+ community cuz we have enough trouble with people who don't find out what the rules are before they move in and say no one ever told me?????????

We have also found that many people don't want to follow rules..so yes..they are reported to managment. Some for not taking care of their garden..........which in some cases is an eyesore, some for giving out clubhouse code to family and friends which is not a safe thing to do. There are some that do and they keep watch. Some for not having their animals on a lease while walking. Some for speeding through the development.

Also.........Many communities 55+ and not have HOA's. Many fights and nonsense starts with them too depending on who is running them.

I understand assisted living and care facilities for the aged are even worse. someone told me they steal each others teeth.
Maybe it is true as ou age you become more chldish???

Anyway..........be happy everyone.....do what makes you happy. Life is too short not too.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 09-09-2009, 05:52 AM
5,819 posts, read 13,274,889 times
Reputation: 9276
A final thought: several builders who received approval to build 55+ communities are revisiting the zoning boards to open them to everyone as there has been a large decrease in sales and interest for 55+.

Another point to take into consideration is resale. You will be selling to a limited customer base.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.

Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply

Loading data...
Based on 2000-2016 data
Loading data...

Hide US histogram

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > Delaware
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 10:12 AM.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top