Why are people in Denver so fake and phony acting? (live, assessments)

[Drew303]

I cant wait until you finally do move so you will stop making these threads. Maybe we can get some donations to speed up the process?

[Count David]

Originally Posted by denverian

Well, when you're dealing with gay men in their lower 20s, trifling is what you're going to get! Gay couples in Denver where both men are black isn't very common for some reason. Maybe you need to be in a city with more black men? I don't know what to tell you. I remember plenty of BS back in my bar days. I didn't meet my partner in a bar. He lived in my building, and didn't go to bars. I wanted nothing more than to meet the one person I would spend the rest of my life with, but had given up. That's when I met that one person - when I stopped trying. Maybe the Universe is telling you to move on, that this place isn't right for you. I believe things happen for a reason, and that I'm always right where I should be, even when things seem wrong. When things seem wrong, they soon change. New beginnings start with an end.

I met my wife when I was 21, when I was desperately trying (working my butt off to get some cash) to get out of a small desert hellhole in CA. The last thing I wanted at the time was a significant other, but here we are.

I too feel rejected by Denver, I even feel like a sell-out for simply being here to some extent. Sometimes things just don't feel right, no matter how good they look on paper. OP, you are not alone in your social issues, eventually you get out of the pool if the water's too cold, right?

[Spork29]

I'm thinking about moving to Denver but now I'm reluctant because of all the "fake" people there! J/K.

Maybe you need to look at your self and make some changes. I'm not gay but seems to me you are not going to make any real friends in a pick up bar.

Maybe you are just trying too hard. How about just living your life and see what happens? I am assuming you are into other activities beside bars and "hooking up". Concentrate on doing things that make you happy and you enjoy. You have to be happy with yourself before making someone else happy.

[DeadwoodJ]

Did you ever think that maybe they don't know who you are the next day is because you are IN A BAR where people GET DRUNK!? I met my wife in a bar....But I don't remember most of the next mornings after going to the bar....Isn't that the point of early 20's bar scene?

[Co_guy_94]

Seriously.........are really 24? You sound like my 15 year old niece who talks about trying to be more popular at her high school and how lame and fake everyone is. Between your immaturity and obvious dislike of this place, why do you keep spending so much time complaining about it? No matter what people tell you, you refuse to believe any of this has anything to do with you and have settled on type casting an entire city of people merely by what you've experienced in a couple bars and some retail stores. If you spent as much time researching another place that suits your needs better you'd probably have found it by now.

[CruisingUSA]

Originally Posted by denverian

I didn't meet my partner in a bar. He lived in my building, and didn't go to bars. I wanted nothing more than to meet the one person I would spend the rest of my life with, but had given up. That's when I met that one person - when I stopped trying.

I have stopped trying. But they still be coming up to me.

It's nice though to meet someone in your building, but maybe my disadvantage is I didn't like any of the 'building' type apartments that were available in Denver and ended up moving to a complex in the suburbs. Everyone here is White and married. Sure gives me a ton of options....But the only other option would be in Capitol Hill where everyone else lives. And coming from other cities, it wasn't necessary to live in the center of town to have a boyfriend. Especially in Florida, people were all over the place.

It's like it's bad enough that I have to meet guys in bars and nightclubs, because Denver has horrible options on meetup.com for gays. I went to one last night and that **** was a bust.

But on top of that I can't really seem to meet people away from them. It's like, what do you want me to do? What am I supposed to do when I don't have any options? People mention all these activities but I still don't really meet people that way.

Originally Posted by DeadwoodJ

Did you ever think that maybe they don't know who you are the next day is because you are IN A BAR where people GET DRUNK!? I met my wife in a bar....But I don't remember most of the next mornings after going to the bar....Isn't that the point of early 20's bar scene?

I didn't mean that literally. They know who I am. But they almost seem to have an attitude about the whole thing.

In other cases I've had guys exchange numbers with me and then they barely follow up with things. And then when I say something jokingly, I told one guy who took 2 or 3 days to respond to 1 text message, in a 1 or 2 word sentence...that "I can give him my P.O. Box number if that would be quicker". He got all cranky on me and I'm like calm down I'm just kidding.

I have seen him out at the bar almost everytime I go. About 10 times I've seen him. He always smiles at me in this flirty smile but doesn't even have the inclination to know me beyond that. So to me, that's a fake smile....

Originally Posted by Co_guy_94

If you spent as much time researching another place that suits your needs better you'd probably have found it by now.

I do that all the time. I have traveled so many places as it is. I already know where I want to go. It's Toronto. It's just not easy to make the move right away especially when I'm holding onto hope that MAYBE, something may come out of living here.

[gingerdancer]

Originally Posted by Timmyy

If you want to meet a nice guy go to a sports bar, a nice one. Men love woman who will sit and watch/talk sports with them. My wife is a prime example of this. This is a huge sports town. Take advantage of it.

Out of curiosity, do you think a more girly-girl who doesn't watch sports might have a more difficult time dating in Denver? Do Denver men, in general, prefer more of a sporty tomboy type?

[proveick]

Moderator ----- pleeeeeeeeeease

[gingerdancer]

Originally Posted by proveick

Moderator ----- pleeeeeeeeeease

uh, excuse me? I asked a perfectly reasonably question. That is what these boards are for. Clearly the people in Denver are mighty "friendly" if this is the response i get.

[Count David]

Originally Posted by gingerdancer

Out of curiosity, do you think a more girly-girl who doesn't watch sports might have a more difficult time dating in Denver? Do Denver men, in general, prefer more of a sporty tomboy type?

No, there are plenty of men here, and plenty of men who like one, the other, or both.