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Old 09-01-2009, 03:31 PM
 
19 posts, read 46,095 times
Reputation: 13

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Hi,

I am from Houston, TX and got a new job in Denver. I am acctually working at Denver without my family. My son is senior at Cy-fair High School and he is playing football. He wants to stay but we don't have family there so my plan is to fly back and forth as money can allow it.

I am not familiar with this situation but my son told me that if he moves to Denver before graduation, there is a chance he will have to do one more year because the credits are different. He also want to finish playing football this year (end of December).

Anyone with an experience similar, please help.
I am spending a fortune being here just by myself (lodging, rental car and food) and I want to know my options.
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Old 09-01-2009, 04:00 PM
Status: "Happy New Year!" (set 19 days ago)
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
88,708 posts, read 105,090,230 times
Reputation: 34189
I'm not an expert on this, but I doubt your son is correct. I think you should make an appointment to talk to a guidance counselor at a Colorado high school, perhaps the one in the attendance area where you are staying now. I have known lots of kids to move into Colorado late in high school, and I've never heard of anyone having to go an extra year. The Athletic Director at the HS will know about the rules for a transfer student and playing sports.
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Old 09-01-2009, 04:22 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
22,176 posts, read 23,772,061 times
Reputation: 37898
I personally would never move a child during their senior year in HS if I could help it....
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Old 09-01-2009, 05:02 PM
 
19 posts, read 46,095 times
Reputation: 13
Maciesmom,

Could you elaborate on this.

Katiana,

That is a good idea. I will set an appointment and talk with the counselor.
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Old 09-01-2009, 05:16 PM
 
59 posts, read 142,305 times
Reputation: 33
I was moved during my senior year of high school and it was the worst decision that I made. High school is a difficult time without any distractions. Add in the stress of moving and then trying to fit into a new school and that is a kids worst nightmare. My grades tumbled, I had no friends, and I went from enjoying school to dreading it. This of course is just my opinion. Your son plays football in Texas. Here in Texas football is everything. He would have a difficult time giving that up and would end up having resentment towards you. Good luck
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Old 09-01-2009, 05:25 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
22,176 posts, read 23,772,061 times
Reputation: 37898
By senior year frienships/groups are pretty well cemented. People might be polite but honestly no one is looking to make new friends. Think of all the memorable "senior year" activities: homecoming; prom; those last games against your main rivalry; senior appreciation recognitions; banquets etc etc. Would YOU want to be going to high school during that time when no one really knows who you are (or cares honestly), all the "inside" jokes that have developed among classmates/teachers/admin/coaches over 4 years of "togetherness" - they're all referencing events you were not a part of.....Fast forward ahead to class reunion time....he won't be invited to the one he might appreciate and probably won't care about the one he is invited to. Sound like fun to you?
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Old 09-01-2009, 05:38 PM
Status: "Happy New Year!" (set 19 days ago)
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
88,708 posts, read 105,090,230 times
Reputation: 34189
My brother had to change high schools senior year and said it was good for him. My niece had to change 2nd semester senior year and is no more the worse for it. She would never have met her husband had her family not moved from Florida to Oklahoma (not to say she would never have gotten married, just not to him)!

When my father got transferred, my mom talked to one of the school counselors who said generally it is preferable for the family to stay together. That was about 40 years ago. Much more recently, a friend's husband was transferred and the counselors told her the same thing.

My daughters both said the friendship groups, etc, changed a lot senior year. Kids are growing up, branching out.

Re: reunions, in my class any former class member is welcome to attend, has been the case for the aforementioned 40 years.
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Old 09-01-2009, 05:43 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
22,176 posts, read 23,772,061 times
Reputation: 37898
I did it. The worst year of my entire life - and I was used to moving....I told myself I would do everything possible to not do that to my kids - and I haven't....Obviously, some people are fine with it but, the OP mentioned that his son does not want to move. I realized that not all things are possible but I would listen hard to what he is saying before I forced a move at this time. JMO.
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Old 09-01-2009, 06:20 PM
Status: "Happy New Year!" (set 19 days ago)
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
88,708 posts, read 105,090,230 times
Reputation: 34189
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
I did it. The worst year of my entire life - and I was used to moving....I told myself I would do everything possible to not do that to my kids - and I haven't....Obviously, some people are fine with it but, the OP mentioned that his son does not want to move. I realized that not all things are possible but I would listen hard to what he is saying before I forced a move at this time. JMO.
Sorry your senior year was so awful. I went to the same high school as my dad; by senior year I was involved in a long distance relationship w/a college guy and didn't really take part in a lot of activities. Stupid, yes, but that's what 17 yo's do. I found that my friendships changed too, just as my daughters' did.

If you really want to go to your former high school's reunion, I'd suggest getting on the web and finding someone who organizes the reunions and let them know. Seriously, my HS, which was very large, welcomes former class members.
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Old 09-01-2009, 07:06 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
22,176 posts, read 23,772,061 times
Reputation: 37898
Thanks Katiana -honestly at this point I don't care too much about that. I used to though. It's been 30 years and I've moved on but I do always feel like I missed out on a lot. That kind of stuff can't be made up. I've always been a pretty outgoing person and good student. We moved my whole life (military family) so I did know what to expect and we did the whole "families stay together" thing. It's just not a decision I would take lightly. My kids have gone their whole school aged years living in the same house and going through the same schools. It was hugely important to me that they have those memories and connections and sense of belonging somewhere. My parents I'm sure struggled watching me struggle so hard that year (and for years after that honestly before I could figure out who I was again and feel good about it)...I don't think they would do it again either. That's just what was done though. Obviously each family has to do the best thing for them. Sometimes things just can't be helped and you just deal with it. The OP is in a difficult position and I feel for him/her....is the financial hit a matter of just having more expenses for awhile and maybe not saving as much or is it going to put the family into bankruptcy...or somewhere in between? Either way it's a big decsion and either way something is going to be sacrificed....no easy answers...
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