Dating - Are there a lot of good guys? (Denver: move to, bars)

[wanttomoveeast]

oh you men are so simple. (re: hotness factor). Which certainly makes a very good point. No need to complicate things when getting a man. You see, hot. We are the ones putting that thought in your mind. Not just on the outside, but we project. hahahaha

oh and that sort of goes along with what I've been saying all along--- projection, auras, attitude. It most certainly attracts men.

[Venusian_Artist]

Originally Posted by wanttomoveeast

oh you men are so simple. (re: hotness factor). Which certainly makes a very good point. No need to complicate things when getting a man. You see, hot. We are the ones putting that thought in your mind. Not just on the outside, but we project. hahahaha

oh and that sort of goes along with what I've been saying all along--- projection, auras, attitude. It most certainly attracts men.

I hate to admit it, but you're right about the energy thing. I've done so many cold approaches it ain't even funny, and I will tell you this: I can look across the room at a woman who doesn't see me yet, and already tell you how she'll react to me when she notices me, what the conversation will be like, and what my chances are with her.

There are subtle, social/psychological cues, but I can actually feel her essence, and whether or not it's compatible with my own. When it's not compatible, I can have a great conversation with her and it will go nowhere. When we match energy-wise, I can read from the phonebook and captivate her.

But, for me at least, it's not so much a matter of her mood that makes it yea or nay. I have actually found that its "soul compatability" or something etheric, that moods only color somewhat. In other words, you are who you are, and you feel a certain way to be around. You can change it a bit, but the essence is always the same. Always. That's as new age as I get, though.

[wanttomoveeast]

Geez, thank god someone else could understand what I was saying. For some reason, sports (and maybe others) just weren't getting what I was trying to explain.

[TurcoLoco]

Originally Posted by Venusian_Artist

Sportsfangal, I hate to break it to you, and I'm not trying to be mean, but if you're hot, you will have no problem getting a guy. Period. Whenever I hear a woman complain that men aren't into her, but that she's attractive, not hard on the eyes, doesn't break mirrors, whatever. That's code for "I think I'm attractive, why don't guys think so?"

Sorry, we can't all be hot. That's life. Hot is how other people see you, not how you see yourself. Maybe you're shooting above your attractiveness level. It happens.

I was thinking of the same but couldn't bring myself to say with and not be seen as a jerk. Anyhow, many girls think they are hot/cute so they think men would/should be all over them but in reality they really are not, so they think there is something wrong with men. Well, I noticed that a lot back when I tried online dating (yeah, we all make mistakes) a few times and realized that is where all the dillusional fugly women hang out nowadays.

So, I agree, and I mentioned this to her earlier, either a) she is not that attractive/or she is but the men she went out with is only interested in "slam bam, thank you ma'm!" or she had done something to turn them off somehow.

Point 2: This notion that a man of quality will wait and get to know you before going for sex is nonsense. We men NEED sex, we must have it. We have, on average, ten to twenty times the testosterone level that you women have. And testosterone is the androgen primarily responsible for sex drive in the human species.

True but you kind of made it sound like that is the only thing a man seeks from a woman, a physicall togetherness is or should be an extension of the emotional togetherness. So, what I am trying to say is, some men, turn their back and fall asleep when they are done it, while some, like myself, like to cuddle and kiss even more so then before doing it. May be I am the only man on this planet who feels that way, I don't know. May be aliens abducted me and placed a smaller brain and a bigger heart in me, who knows?
But I am not disagreeing the fact that men need physical side of the relatioship, and much more and sooner than women I think.

Put simply, no matter what women say, they do not have a sex drive even close to a man's. There is so much scientific data, as well as common sense anecdotal evidence for this, I wouldn't know where to begin. You, as a woman, are more into what sex can get you from a man (love, security, etc; ) we're more into sex for sex's sake.

As Chris Rock said, women have an ATM machine between their legs and most of the smart, hot and evil ones take advantage of that, naturally...

My current girlfriend of 1.5 years tried to pull that "no sex till we get to know each other" B.S. We broke up over it,

What the f?? What are you guys like 15-16? If you are couple of teenagers, then yeah. If you are in your early 20s, I could buy that too but after early 20s it sounds like a joke, especially at this day and age this seems a bit outdated. After 1.5 years and she is still playing Virgin Mary?
Man, you have a lot more patience than me that is for sure. I'd have put a temporary 'ecco' tattoo on her butt before she could finish her sentence!


Bottom line (if there really ever was one) SFG, you will have to figure out on your own what it is that is messing things up for you before you end up an old lady with 18 cats.

PS. WTME, thanks for the rep.

[Venusian_Artist]

Originally Posted by wanttomoveeast

Geez, thank god someone else could understand what I was saying. For some reason, sports (and maybe others) just weren't getting what I was trying to explain.

Well, not everyone can conciously recognize it, but everyone does feel and react to a person's essence. It's like ants, they react to human presence, but they don't really know what we're about. They can't process the incoming stimuli into a recognizable pattern that they can comprehend. But when you stomp an anthill, they do respond.

In seduction, women are more sensitive to this energy people have. We men are blinded by a woman's looks into feeling sexual attraction, but women do not judge "replication value" on looks, so they use their intuition from the get-go.

It's not because women are more evolved than men, they are not. It's just that their need is less immediate for the opposite gender, so they can pass on a good thing because it doesn't "feel right," and wait for the next one.

After a man has had sex, though, his head clears, and he starts to evaluate a woman's essence in much the same way. And he may then realize the incompatibility. That is when he bolts and doesn't call.

[wanttomoveeast]

No prob. turco and I had to laugh out loud at the cat woman remark! Thanks gentlemen for confirming most of what I already thought and have figured out through the years.

[TurcoLoco]

Originally Posted by Venusian_Artist

After a man has had sex, though, his head clears, and he starts to evaluate a woman's essence in much the same way. And he may then realize the incompatibility. That is when he bolts and doesn't call.

True that a man can think better, clearer but that is unlikely to be the case every time unless those men fogot to clean their pipes before the date.
That would never happen to be, I mean lack of sex never messing me up that bad, or I should say, having it clear my mind that much. Besides, the only reason I would high tail it is if she farted in my face during or after sex.

[wanttomoveeast]

I don't think men are inferior to us, no way, just programmed differently. I love the ant analogy. I was approaching the idea from the metaphysical thought, which does get a bit hokey for me.

I found your last paragraph amusing, the blindness by hotness and then the awakening and knowing of a woman's essence.

Tell me this... do men notice and think (I'm guessing the answer is no here) when they are in the initial stages of dating how women will often drop everything to be with them? I mean ignoring their friends, cancelling appts. just to be with them? Do men take a conscious note of how the woman slowly loses herself to them? I have a friend doing this right now and it's driving me nutso. I wonder whether her guy is taking notice.

Originally Posted by Venusian_Artist

Well, not everyone can conciously recognize it, but everyone does feel and react to a person's essence. It's like ants, they react to human presence, but they don't really know what we're about. They can't process the incoming stimuli into a recognizable pattern that they can comprehend. But when you stomp an anthill, they do respond.

In seduction, women are more sensitive to this energy people have. We men are blinded by a woman's looks into feeling sexual attraction, but women do not judge "replication value" on looks, so they use their intuition from the get-go.

It's not because women are more evolved than men, they are not. It's just that their need is less immediate for the opposite gender, so they can pass on a good thing because it doesn't "feel right," and wait for the next one.

After a man has had sex, though, his head clears, and he starts to evaluate a woman's essence in much the same way. And he may then realize the incompatibility. That is when he bolts and doesn't call.

[TurcoLoco]

Originally Posted by wanttomoveeast

No prob. turco and I had to laugh out loud at the cat woman remark! Thanks gentlemen for confirming most of what I already thought and have figured out through the years.

At this point, I am just BS'ing around and killing time since things are slow at work...

[wanttomoveeast]

omg are you my brother!?! He cracks me up just like this. I bet that men's minds do clear up a bit. Same thing happens to women. But this is different than the aura thing I was trying to describe. This is just "letting the walls down". Or "taking off the mask". Everyone wears a mask and after the initial dating period, the mask slowly comes off and sometimes it's not for the good!!

Originally Posted by TurcoLoco

True that a man can think better, clearer but that is unlikely to be the case every time unless those men fogot to clean their pipes before the date.
That would never happen to be, I mean lack of sex never messing me up that bad, or I should say, having it clear my mind that much. Besides, the only reason I would high tail it is if she farted in my face during or after sex.