Moving to Detroit Area --- need to find the right suburb!!!! (Ann Arbor: sale, cliquey)

[Sparty311]

I would suggest Birmingham/Bloomfield/Troy/Rochester as well. This is the area that I grew up in (lived in the same house for 18 years!). The schools are by far the best in the state and the homes are beautiful. Very convenient to shopping and restaurants as well. To me, it's a no-brainer that this is the area you would want to be in Michigan.

Unfortunately, my fiance was unable to find a job in MI and has relocated to PA. We hope to move back one day!

Good luck with your search!

[BookLover08]

May I ask what is important to you culturally? For some people, it's all about the great outdoors, for others, it can be the social clubs and community things, or it could be about cultural, artistic centers.


We are originally Ohioans who have moved to large, metropolitan cities like Washington, D.C. and Miami because of jobs. They were both fascinating, cosmopolitan places with a lot to do and cultural activities galore. Which is perfect for me because that's critical to my happiness. I'm a writer and city person and need to be around a variety of things and people in order to feel nourished.

We moved from Miami to Grosse Pointe a year ago and have a rental. It gave us time to check out the beautiful homes in the area. They are indeed nice and the parks are stunning. The school system is terrific if you go public. Private schools like GPA and ULS are very cliquey and difficult for both mothers and children - they don't like outsiders at all so forewarned is forearmed.

All that said, we are renting in Birmingham next year because it has what I like - a variety of people, cultural things to do, good school system and I just got a general good vibe from the people there. They seemed open, not shut down or smug, and they came across as having a playful sense of humor about themselves. Sure, I saw the occasional snob there but they're in every area in the country! Overall, it seemed to offer a place where I could be happier and life's too short to live in a place where you don't fit in.

I'm a strange, idiosyncratic sort that likes used bookstores, vintage clothing shops, lots of different ethnic foods, art theaters that show things other than summer blockbusters, comic book stores, a decent Salvation Army or Goodwill store with hidden treasures. In short, I'm kind of a nerdy, artsy bohemian sort, I guess. That didn't go over well in Grosse Pointe. I'm hoping to have better luck in Birmingham.

An anecdote for you about kids - my 8 Y.O. daughter was practicing with the Grosse Pointe swim team and I encouraged her to make friends. I told her to introduce herself to some of the kids. She's normally a very extroverted child who has a gift for making friends (I'm an introvert so I find that a great trait!). She said to me after practice one day when I asked her who she had met, "Mom, they don't have friendly faces." My heart just broke. I knew what she meant because I had the same experience with many of the mothers here. The vibe can be very chilly and suspicious and it just seems unnecesary. What are these women afraid of? The nicest people in GP were the older neighbors I have. Just lovely people without attitudes.

[austinb1212]

Welcome to Metro Detroit! Based on your needs I would say the current housing market will allow you to find a very nice house in Birmingham. It is a nice walkable community with great schools.

I'm a Realtor with an office in Birmingham. I know of a few homes that sold for well over a million dollars several years ago that are now on the market for well under one million.

If you have not found a place yet, send me a message and I will send you my contact information.

[GinaJ]

I grew up in West Bloomfield and my mom currently lives there still in a community in your price range. Her sub is very nice and there are many homes for sale that have been for quite awhile cause of how bad the market is. There are some lovely areas off the lake if you take Orchard Lake to Pontiac Trail in WB. Now I will say this area can be very snobby. I never got used to it but my mom feels the pros outweigh the cons. I don't know why people have to be that way. We all put our pants on one leg at a time. I went to Birmingham schools though lived in WB. If you like an older home style then Birmingham is more a small town feeling. My brother had a home on Sylvan Lake that was quaint and more down to earth but I am not sure the school district. I really think Orchard Lake area in WB is lovely. Good luck

[attkrt]

My family and I moved to the pointes four years ago from VERY CONSERVATIVE Grand Rapids. To us, the pointe are much more middle of the road.

As for the woman who is moving to Birmingham, I'm sorry to hear she had a bad experience here. Obviously, she was not introduced to the friendly side of GP. My children have made great friends here as well as myself. Most of our friends are life long residents and most are living in much larger homes than us. That just doesn't matter to most people. As far as being artsy etc, I have met some wonderful woman who have made art the most important part of their lives.

Back to GP. We moved here for just a few specific reasons
1. Older homes with architectural details-the McMansions in other suburbs were too sterile for us.

2. Fabulous school system

3. Sidewalks everywhere. Tree lined streets; other suburbs we investigated were just subdivisions leading to very busy streets.

4. Light Traffic

5. Park system. Basically, our city park (Pier Park) is our country club in the summer. We can ride our bikes down in the morning and spend the day. Tons of activities-swimming, hanging out on the beach, tennis, arts and crafts etc.

I don't know of any other community in Michigan with a park system like those in the pointes!

[nEEbz]

Southfield maybe? ..or somewhere along the west side of warren towards Detroit?

Just kidding Messed up city we've got.

Bloomfield is nice, but obviously very costly. Troy is not a bad option either.

[BookLover08]

Originally Posted by attkrt

My family and I moved to the pointes four years ago from VERY CONSERVATIVE Grand Rapids. To us, the pointe are much more middle of the road.

We moved from not-so-conservative Miami. Art, politics and self-expression are much more liberal down there, hence my characterization of GP as conservative.

As for the woman who is moving to Birmingham, I'm sorry to hear she had a bad experience here. Obviously, she was not introduced to the friendly side of GP.

So, basically I was SOL as well as my kid? I don't get this comment. People are friendly as long as you fit their criteria of 'fitting in' or conforming to their values. If people size you up as not being like them, they pass you by. Kids did this to my child and also to me. After much analysis and observation, I realized that this wasn't the place for US. I'm not saying that GP is bad for everyone. I think it's a perfect fit for some but not others. That's why I asked the original poster of this thread what they were looking for in a community, what mattered most to them. It always comes down to values. I like what Birmingham has to offer in terms of its central location, diverse population, more liberal politics, WAY more artistic choices in outlets and classes, and just generally the feeling of being a 'little fish in a big pond.' I don't like the isolated feeling of being in the Pointes, nor the stuffiness (everyone seems to dress in this really boring way, like they just came out of a Lands End catalog.) And as for artsy, no, it's not at all, unless you consider flower arranging at the War Memorial to be serious art. Maybe for kids, music and theater are options in the Pointes, but there is no serious arts community here for adults.

My children have made great friends here as well as myself.

Congratulations! You're a better person than me. You win!

Most of our friends are life long residents and most are living in much larger homes than us. That just doesn't matter to most people. As far as being artsy etc, I have met some wonderful woman who have made art the most important part of their lives.

Who said anything about the size of anyone's home? I was talking about the people, the general vibe. And yes, I know there are a few established artists in the area - but that's my point. I'm not established. I'm just getting started in that direction. That means I need a community for that. GP is not it. Birmingham, Royal Oak, Ferndale and surrounding areas have artistic populations who support that. Or as one person who is a teacher at a nearby college put it when I told her that I am a writer and had just moved to GP, "You will be not be fed." And she just shook her head. She was right.

Back to GP. We moved here for just a few specific reasons

1. Older homes with architectural details-the McMansions in other suburbs were too sterile for us.

2. Fabulous school system

Birmingham has these things too and it's located in a more happening area as others on the Detroit board have mentioned. GP is known for being 'traditional,' read not socially progressive. Not what I'm looking for when I can similar housing and schools in a more expressive, open place. Also, GP is known for its racism. Coming from Miami, which was WAY more racially mixed, GP's lily-white, uber-WASPy population was a shock to my system! I felt like I had been transported to the '50, the 1850s! Heh. It reminded me of two things - the lebensporn program of Nazi Germany - so many 'Aryan looking' people and the repressive community in the movie 'Pleasantville' with Tobey Maguire.

3. Sidewalks everywhere. Tree lined streets; other suburbs we investigated were just subdivisions leading to very busy streets.

Birmingham has this too! Wow.

4. Light Traffic

5. Park system. Basically, our city park (Pier Park) is our country club in the summer. We can ride our bikes down in the morning and spend the day. Tons of activities-swimming, hanging out on the beach, tennis, arts and crafts etc.

I don't know of any other community in Michigan with a park system like those in the pointes!

Again, also Birmingham and some parts of Royal Oak. In fact, my husband found the parks in Birmingham to be bigger and superior to the parks in the Pointes - better kids playgrounds. In the end, I guess it's apples and oranges if both places have many of the same things. The big differences are location (GP is isolated from many terrific parts of Detroit metro area), sensibility (Birmingham is more diverse and there are many kinds of openly expressive people there, not so stodgy and status quo), and political (Birmingham has different political types, with a sizable Democratic population). There are way too many Romney and McCain supporters in GP for my liking.

Hey, some people in family would LOOOOVE GP - they're stuffy and Republican too. It's perfect for that. But I've never met a more uncurious group of people in my life. Not much of a sense of humor, no sense of fun, sponteneity, etc.

Basically, I see it this way: if GP was a woman, she would be Laura Bush. If Birmingham was a woman, she would be Mary-Louise Parker (Weeds).

[Cclass84]

Grosse pointe is soo overrated.
#1 miles from good entertainment
#2 dirty lake st. clair
#3 fish flys
#4 too quiet
#5 too much government (getting pulled over 2 mph over the speed limit)

[attkrt]

This is too funny.

I love how Booklover08 insinuates that I dislike the opionion of others. Obviously, she feels the same way.

I hope that my original post did not offend others as much as Booklover08's offended me (and probably other GPointers)

I don't like the isolated feeling of being in the Pointes, nor the stuffiness (everyone seems to dress in this really boring way, like they just came out of a Lands End catalog.)

Really? Well, I personally don't shop at Land's End but I can tell you that my opinion on this is that we do dress "preppy" which at the very least looks put together and tasteful. Quite frankly, I would rather dress in timeless fashion than trendy fashions that quite frankly look dirty.

[QUOTE]
Also, GP is known for its racism. Coming from Miami, which was WAY more racially mixed, GP's lily-white, uber-WASPy population was a shock to my system
[/quote]

This one I LOVE! My children are not white-they are Asian. Guess what? They are not the only ones in their school....hmmmmmm.

My children have made great friends here as well as myself.

Congratulations! You're a better person than me. You win!

No, I don't "win". I obviously have a more outgoing personality and will talk to people without waiting for them to talk to me. Anywhere you choose to live, you need to make an effort. It sounds like you waited for friends to come to you.

Re: Parks- Show me a park in Birmingham/Royal Oak with pools, beaches, community building, tennis, paddle tennis, refrigerated ice rink, dance lessons etc.

[quote]
Grosse pointe is soo overrated.
#1 miles from good entertainment. (Yes, that 10 minute drive to Comerica Park, Joe Louis, etc is a killer)
#2 dirty lake st. clair (False-see #3)
#3 fish flys (3 weeks each summer-more fish flies-the cleaner the lake)
#4 too quiet (Yes, I wouldn't want to live somewhere with traffic that takes me forever to get to the grocery store!)
#5 too much government (getting pulled over 2 mph over the speed limit)(Two things on this one-safety is important, two-if you don't like it, don't drive through here.

[detshen]

I don't like Grosse Point or Birmingham! I like Ferndale and downtown Detroit. We all like different things and places and that's great. The extreme generalizations aren't very helpful and they can be hurtful to the people who live in these places.