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My wife and I recently adopted a 3 year old female Beagle to replace our old female we had put down. We currently have an old male and a 3 year old male who is 1/2 brother to the new female. When I got my young male 2 years ago from the breeder I was made aware of this female, Shiraz, and was informed(and saw) she was fearful of men.
And she still is. We have had her 3 weeks and not much progress has been made with me since the 1st 48 hours. I can pet her in many situations(when she is resting on a couch)and I can hand her treats. When she is on the move in the house she runs when she sees me. If my approach is too threatening she may pee a little/lot. If I can get her on a leash to walk her in our large run she stays fearful. She growls at me when she is with the wife, on the bed.
My wife, on the other hand, is making very good progress and Shiraz has bonded nicely with her. So, 1)does anyone have any tricks to dissolve this problem and 2) are there some dogs that never overcome this fear. I am concerned about the day we let her off-leash that she might try to escape from our run and don't want peeing in the house. TIA.
You need to be the one to take care of her, totally. Feed her, treat her, etc. Not your wife. Your dog needs to associate you with "good" things that come her way. Do not try to handle her if she shrinks away. Let her come to you. Speak to her in a calm low tone. If she starts to "check you out," just ignore her. She needs to feel confident that you won't invade her space.
I had a foster dog like this. Whenever a male guest came to my home, they were told to strictly ignore her. Do not look at her, do not react to her, just let her sniff you. I gave them treats to give her (she was highly food motivated). After about 3 visits, she would climb into their lap to get a REALLY good sniff (belly, chest, face). They still would not react, as you could still see her tension. Eventually, she allowed them to pet her and she became more relaxed.
2) are there some dogs that never overcome this fear. I am concerned about the day we let her off-leash that she might try to escape from our run and don't want peeing in the house.
I'd say it is more than just some.
At 3 years I'd say that fear is permanently imprinted in this dog.
Running away and peeing on the carpet are the least of the concerns I'd have
Something happened to that dog and no matter how nice you are it won't be fixed.
I once adopted an older Doberman who had been severely abused. It took 6 months for her to even get to the point where she'd crawl on her belly to me, peeing the whole way. Long story short: it took me a year, but with patience, love and gentle attention (and lots of delicious food) she came around and lived out the rest of her 13 years as my loving, loyal companion.
I think Fontucky said it best...patients is key in this...and do NOT give up.
This dog needs to know you are going to be the one that helps her through this, not lets her down. She is not a problem dog. She is a dog in need. So, first, thank you for taking her into your pack.
Second,YOU need to find out what motivates her. Food? Toy? Play? Second, your wife, bless her heart will need to back off for awhile. She (the dog) has taken possession of your wife which is why she growls at you when you approach. Not a good thing. That is a dominance issue.
As Steelstress said, you need to take over everything for this dog, walks, feeding, treats, toys, EVERYTHING! If it's good, it comes from YOU!
Since this dog is afraid, approach it with your side instead of your full-front. So it's a side-step motion. This is less threatening than just walking up to her. You will be able to do this (walk up full-frond) in the future but for now, you are trying to gain her trust.
It's also like Fontucky said, let her approach you. Have yummy food if she is food driven. Try to use as few words with her as possible, too...for now. Let her know you as scent. Don't look at her directly. Eye contact is a challenge and you already know she will pee with your challenge. (You scare the pee out of her!)
BE PATIENT, she will come around. She may have issues but with patients and time, she will be a good dog. Never give her a reason to run...and she won't. Your wife can help, too...but for now, you need to be the EVERYTHING source for this little gal.
Keep us in the loop and let us know how all of you are doing!
I think Fontucky said it best...patients is key in this...and do NOT give up.
And that year I mentioned, that was a full year of every day, for many hours each day. I work out of the house, so I was able to devote the time. Dogs with fear and abuse issues should never be left alone and they need almost constant work until they (if they) come around. Patience and rote consistency are the keys.
as others have said...
theres no such thing as a lost cause...
she CAN be turned around (ive delt with dogs with 5-8 years of abuse and neglect and managed to turn them around
so mr rational is actually mr irrational...she CAN get through this.
1: no more on the bed...if shes growling at you shes claiming the bed and the wife...plain and simple, no more bed untill she can be trusted.
2: take over care. you need to be the "good guy" in the relationship for a while, no yelling no loud tone, no sudden movments, everything you do must be confident and calm around her...unless your working directly with her...ignore her completly...
keep a pocket full of treats and randmly drop one by your feet when your doign general stuff...
when aproaching her dont look at her face on, eye contact is a challenge, whenever making eye contact blink...not every second, but every so often make a concious effort to blink or turn your head to break the gaze.
when your working with her get down on her level, kneel or sit on the ground and work with her dierectly, on her level...remeber your HUGE compared to the world as she sees it.
lots of CALM praise plenty of motiation and positive reinforcment.
when goign to take her out, kneel with the leash and call her to you instead of looming over her trying to clip it, or use a slip leash that you can none chalantly slip over her head and continue walking wihtout making any fuss...
when out keep moving, keep positive, and keep the treats comming...given shes a beagle ill put money that food is going to win this battle.
let her come to you whenever possible and be patient...she will get through this with lots of time, love and patients from you.
It will take time. It won't happen overnight. Our beagle basset was a skitterish when he first came here. He slowly decided that he felt safe. Even after being with us for 8 years, he'll still tip toe out of the room if he senses tension between family members. I'm not even talking outright arguing or raised voices, just tension, stress or normal intense discussion.
Just taking over care isn't enough. You have to do everything you can to convince this dog that you are gentle and would never ever hurt it. It's going to take years before the dog truly believes it. But I'll say within 6 months to a year you'll have a more solid relationship if you work at it.
Don't push yourself on her. Don't approach her in a way that SHE considers threatening. You need to SLOWLY allow this dog to realize that you aren't going to hurt her. After you've gained her trust, you'll be able to walk normally without causing her fear.
My parents adopted a shepherd mix years ago and she had some fear issues. With her it just took time. They didn't do any of the usual things that experts suggest (him feeding her etc); just because my dad wasn't that concerned about it. Had they done so, she would have come around sooner.
Time heals all wounds--not completely of course but it can work wonders!
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Patients is key...
