U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Pets > Dogs
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 04-07-2012, 08:45 PM
 
3,593 posts, read 10,619,772 times
Reputation: 5195

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheDailyCompulsion View Post
In August of 2007 my girlfriend at the time and I adopted a dog from one of her friends who had puppies. We broke up about 14 months later and she moved 4 hours away because of a job promotion. We had an agreement to share the dog off and on for one or two months at a time. She travels for work constantly and has to leave for weeks at a time and her company is headquartered in the city I still live in so it worked out very well for her to drive down here, drop the dog off with me for a while and then pick him up when she wasn't going to be traveling in the foreseeable future.

Last month she decided she was done sharing him because of her own personal reasons which she won't accurately reveal to me.

I am contemplating the idea of meeting with a lawyer and determining if it is a good idea to sue her for full ownership of the dog OR for back payment for all the times I watched him and fed him and took him to the vet and groomings, since apparently according to her, he was never really my dog.

I do not want to go this route but think it might be necessary to bring the balance back to the point where we shared him. She goes out of town on business all the time and really is in no position to be a good doggy-mama. I have no idea who she leaves him with now when she goes out of town, but if it is anyone, it should be me.

Thanks for listening and all feedback is appreciated. Also, please don't tell me to just go get a new dog, I want MY dog.
Sorry but you probably don't have a legal leg to stand on.

Unless....you are named on one or more of the following:

Vet Records
Adoption records
City Dog License records

IF you are listed on any of these you would have a small chance of winning. If you are not listed on any of them, you have NO chance of winning.

I know it hurts, we all have dogs too. If you can't establish ownership, the only option you have is to move on.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 04-07-2012, 08:59 PM
 
16,018 posts, read 19,506,890 times
Reputation: 26169
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheDailyCompulsion View Post
In August of 2007 my girlfriend at the time and I adopted a dog from one of her friends who had puppies. We broke up about 14 months later and she moved 4 hours away because of a job promotion. We had an agreement to share the dog off and on for one or two months at a time. She travels for work constantly and has to leave for weeks at a time and her company is headquartered in the city I still live in so it worked out very well for her to drive down here, drop the dog off with me for a while and then pick him up when she wasn't going to be traveling in the foreseeable future.

Last month she decided she was done sharing him because of her own personal reasons which she won't accurately reveal to me.

I am contemplating the idea of meeting with a lawyer and determining if it is a good idea to sue her for full ownership of the dog OR for back payment for all the times I watched him and fed him and took him to the vet and groomings, since apparently according to her, he was never really my dog.

I do not want to go this route but think it might be necessary to bring the balance back to the point where we shared him. She goes out of town on business all the time and really is in no position to be a good doggy-mama. I have no idea who she leaves him with now when she goes out of town, but if it is anyone, it should be me.

Thanks for listening and all feedback is appreciated. Also, please don't tell me to just go get a new dog, I want MY dog.
Sue her for custody. Sounds like you have been the primary caregiver of the dog....since she left him w/ you most often. How selfish of her to out of the blue decide you can't even have him. Consult an attorney.....relatively new ground, so do some checking w/ folks....Maybe check w/ your local animal shelter for an attorney that would be sympathetic to your plight.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-08-2012, 04:55 AM
 
Location: The Great State of Arkansas
5,981 posts, read 16,261,654 times
Reputation: 7571
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheDailyCompulsion View Post
In August of 2007 my girlfriend at the time and I adopted a dog from one of her friends who had puppies. We broke up about 14 months later and she moved 4 hours away because of a job promotion. We had an agreement to share the dog off and on for one or two months at a time. She travels for work constantly and has to leave for weeks at a time and her company is headquartered in the city I still live in so it worked out very well for her to drive down here, drop the dog off with me for a while and then pick him up when she wasn't going to be traveling in the foreseeable future.

Last month she decided she was done sharing him because of her own personal reasons which she won't accurately reveal to me.
Maybe she's not working the same job or not coming to your city as much? You say she goes out of town all the time, but since you two haven't been close lately perhaps things have changed? Four hours is a LONG way away.

It sounds like she IS involved with someone else and perhaps that is who is watching the dog if/when she is gone. You still need to back up and think about her as a dog owner (and please try to be objective and give credit where it is due). If she was unfailingly good to the dog, then really think. I know you want your dog, but hauling it up and down the highway and 2 months here and 2 months there is a little bit of a crazy schedule.

It sounds like the dog you and your ex had....well, sad to say, but he's probably in his forever home. The best you can do now is to tell her you will watch the dog if needed and try to extract a promise from her (preferably written) that if for any reason she has to surrender the dog she will do so to you. In the meantime, believe in her - it sounds like the worst thing she has going for her is that she might travel a lot, and pets live with so much worse. You know the type owner she is...even though it hurts, you may have to just thank your lucky stars she didn't throw the dog away and go on, or give it to a total stranger.

I don't think any judge other than Judge Judy is really going to want to get up in the middle of this. I'll go with the majority here - there are so many dogs needing a good home - so very, very many. Please consider adopting another homeless animal. While you are crying over your dog, and I do understand that and sympathize totally, there is only so much you can really do. She has possession and has taken a stand. BUT - You can change the world for one castaway dog - please do. I promise, you will be rewarded ten thousand times over and the karma will get right.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-10-2012, 04:11 AM
 
Location: Texas
43,369 posts, read 52,267,884 times
Reputation: 70271
Huh.

My ex wanted to do the shared custody, but I would not have it.
That was MY dog.

Op, I don't know what options you really have at this point. Once you let someone else walk off with the dog, you are kind of screwed.

I mean, you can try the lawyer...she may relent because of not wanting the hassle of legal trouble. However, I would NOT sue for the costs of anything. That is b.s. If the DOG is what's important to you, go after the dog. Asking for money does not make any sense. And it doesn't show your love for the dog.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-10-2012, 07:39 AM
 
Location: Visitation between Wal-Mart & Home Depot
8,309 posts, read 34,233,349 times
Reputation: 7067
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheDailyCompulsion View Post
In August of 2007 my girlfriend at the time and I adopted a dog from one of her friends who had puppies. We broke up about 14 months later and she moved 4 hours away because of a job promotion. We had an agreement to share the dog off and on for one or two months at a time. She travels for work constantly and has to leave for weeks at a time and her company is headquartered in the city I still live in so it worked out very well for her to drive down here, drop the dog off with me for a while and then pick him up when she wasn't going to be traveling in the foreseeable future.

Last month she decided she was done sharing him because of her own personal reasons which she won't accurately reveal to me.

I am contemplating the idea of meeting with a lawyer and determining if it is a good idea to sue her for full ownership of the dog OR for back payment for all the times I watched him and fed him and took him to the vet and groomings, since apparently according to her, he was never really my dog.

I do not want to go this route but think it might be necessary to bring the balance back to the point where we shared him. She goes out of town on business all the time and really is in no position to be a good doggy-mama. I have no idea who she leaves him with now when she goes out of town, but if it is anyone, it should be me.

Thanks for listening and all feedback is appreciated. Also, please don't tell me to just go get a new dog, I want MY dog.
Here's the problem as I see it:

No one is ever going to walk away with a dog that is mine. Ever. If the dog just lived with me during the period of time in which I was cohabitating with his real owner, then I would be able to let him go (and would probably be wise to do so).

That's her dog. Let her have it. Don't be bitter, clingy, obnoxious and litigious; that's not very attractive.

I suggest that you go do some manliness exercises.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-10-2012, 11:35 AM
Status: "Support the Mining Law of 1872" (set 24 days ago)
 
Location: Cody, WY
9,508 posts, read 10,804,089 times
Reputation: 19060
Quote:
Originally Posted by Oleg Bach View Post
No one in their right mind is going to seriously sympathetic to his "plight"---what plight?...any lawyer who would take your case is just using you ....Did you know that more money is spent on dogs than children these days....no wonder the terrorists have no respect for the west...."primary care giver" - that's a phrase pulled right out of human divorce court...OMG....I would toss a thousand dogs into the ocean to save one human child....and I can't stand vets that charge you 200 bucks to tell me my mutt has a common cold....
I'd toss every human child in the world into the ocean to save one dog.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-10-2012, 11:38 AM
 
Location: Hudson County, NJ
1,493 posts, read 2,669,214 times
Reputation: 1177
The vet bills in which you paid for iin your name might help with some ownership in regards to the dog. I doubt you'll get any money back. Its tough, and I know how it is to be attached to the dog.

You may be better off wishing the both of them best of luck, maybe you'll get to see the dog once in a while throughout the year, and go rescue a new dog. Plenty need homes, and before you know it, will be your own and you'll love just as much as this one. Good luck.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-10-2012, 12:17 PM
 
2,519 posts, read 5,332,650 times
Reputation: 3497
First off, I'm sorry so many disregard your request about going out and getting a new dog. When you two separated, did your ex keep the dog or did you? Is there any papers proving ownership? Who took care of the dog the majority of the time and paid the vet bills the majority of the time? Did you each have a vet, or did she just have a vet? Instead of paying a lawyer, why not ask your ex if you can buy her out? If the dogs means so much, maybe she'll sell him to you.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-10-2012, 12:27 PM
 
Location: Mostly in my head
19,805 posts, read 55,631,864 times
Reputation: 18973
getting acrimonious - back on topic please
__________________
Moderator for Utah, Salt Lake City, Diabetes, Cancer, Pets forums
http://www.city-data.com/forumtos.html

Realtors are welcome here but do see our Realtor Advice to avoid infractions.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-10-2012, 12:31 PM
 
28,906 posts, read 46,513,173 times
Reputation: 45983
I hate to say this, but it's just a dog.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Pets > Dogs
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. | Please obey Forum Rules | Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top