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Old 10-31-2012, 07:58 AM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,499 posts, read 53,772,135 times
Reputation: 47904

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don't have to be a man, divorced, dog owner or anything else to see the humor in this. I think it is funny. Thanks for posting.
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Old 10-31-2012, 08:24 AM
 
566 posts, read 1,101,763 times
Reputation: 709
My husband LOVES chicken stew! I admit you must add a bit more garlic and sea salt - but the dogs dont mind sharing. sshhhhh... In a pinch it makes a great pot pie filler . He expects his meat and potatoes while I have pasta salad SO BE IT. j/k or am I? The Halo brand- why it looks just like regular people food!!
Quote:
1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.
2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.
4. A dog's parents never visit.
5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
6. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.
7. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.
8. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"
9. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them all away.
10. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.
11. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad; they just think it's interesting.
12. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.
13. To test this whole concept, lock your wife and your dog in the garage for an hour. Then open it and see who's happy to see you.
Maybe guys can rethink the whole "marrying" thing?

Trust me, knowing what I know now (going thru a divorce after 28 years of wedded hell--I should have just bought him a dog...but then, who would have bought the food? Opened the container? Put it in the dish? ETC ETC ETC

I do recall he asked ME (to marry). Oh well

Funny stuff

Last edited by hellothereIN; 10-31-2012 at 08:39 AM..
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Old 10-31-2012, 08:35 AM
 
Location: The Brat Stop
8,347 posts, read 7,203,793 times
Reputation: 2279
Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post
No. Why would this be personal? I've never even owned a dog in my entire life and I am 68. What I posted was one of those things that circulates via email, forwarded and re-forwarded. I thought it was hilarious - too good to just ignore and worth sharing.
The problem with some members is that they take things personally.
I meant nothing personal, and was joking. do you know what these mean?
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Old 10-31-2012, 09:00 AM
 
Location: Kansas
25,561 posts, read 21,747,086 times
Reputation: 26137
I thought it was really cute. I can just visualize the "show" when the garage door opens! A sense of humor is a blessing especially in today's world like when the cat unrolls the toilet paper (mine used to remove the kleenex from the box, the ones that connect to one another which speeds up the process) or the dog has the "No, it wasn't me." look when you come home and find the sofa pillows in the middle of the living room floor!
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Old 10-31-2012, 09:35 AM
 
Location: Pennsylvania
30,218 posts, read 15,980,059 times
Reputation: 43907
I thought it funny too!


except for 68 and never having had a dog? really? you poor thing.
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Old 10-31-2012, 11:36 AM
 
Location: On the corner of Grey Street
6,126 posts, read 10,067,928 times
Reputation: 11796
It's just a joke guys! I thought it was hilarious and I'm a woman! I bet we could make a list about why dogs are better than husbands too.
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Old 10-31-2012, 12:27 PM
 
Location: Alaska
5,356 posts, read 18,484,867 times
Reputation: 4071
Quote:
Originally Posted by strawberrykiki View Post
It's just a joke guys! I thought it was hilarious and I'm a woman! I bet we could make a list about why dogs are better than husbands too.
Here you go:
1.Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.
2.Dogs miss you when you're gone.
3.You never wonder whether your dog is good enough for you.
4.Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong.
5.Dogs admit when they're jealous.
6.Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.
7.You can train a dog.
8.You are never suspicious of your dog's dreams.
9.Gorgeous dogs don't know they're gorgeous.
10.Dogs understand what "no" means
11.Dogs understand if some of their friends cannot come inside.
12.Dogs think you are a culinary genius.
13.You can force a dog to take a bath.
14.Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.
15.Dogs don't mind if you do all the driving.
16.Dogs admit it when they're lost.
17.Dogs do not care whether you shave your legs.
18.Dogs take care of their own needs.
19.Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.
20.Dogs are nice to your relatives.

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Old 10-31-2012, 12:29 PM
 
35,095 posts, read 50,952,945 times
Reputation: 62660
Quote:
Originally Posted by Va-Cat View Post
and I'd bet money that with that attitude, the only females that would want to be around you are the ones that have to be bought, adopted or picked up off the street.
Wouldn't that be the same woman?


PS -- Original Poster........very cute indeed it gave me a smile and I know my husband will love it when I read it to him....
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Old 10-31-2012, 04:45 PM
 
43,011 posts, read 107,598,282 times
Reputation: 30709
Quote:
Originally Posted by akck View Post
Here you go:
1.Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.
2.Dogs miss you when you're gone.
3.You never wonder whether your dog is good enough for you.
4.Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong.
5.Dogs admit when they're jealous.
6.Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.
7.You can train a dog.
8.You are never suspicious of your dog's dreams.
9.Gorgeous dogs don't know they're gorgeous.
10.Dogs understand what "no" means
11.Dogs understand if some of their friends cannot come inside.
12.Dogs think you are a culinary genius.
13.You can force a dog to take a bath.
14.Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.
15.Dogs don't mind if you do all the driving.
16.Dogs admit it when they're lost.
17.Dogs do not care whether you shave your legs.
18.Dogs take care of their own needs.
19.Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.
20.Dogs are nice to your relatives.

That's funny too!
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Old 10-31-2012, 11:43 PM
 
7,339 posts, read 12,557,569 times
Reputation: 9873
Quote:
Originally Posted by akck View Post
Here you go:
1.Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.
2.Dogs miss you when you're gone.
3.You never wonder whether your dog is good enough for you.
4.Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong.
5.Dogs admit when they're jealous.
6.Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.
7.You can train a dog.
8.You are never suspicious of your dog's dreams.
9.Gorgeous dogs don't know they're gorgeous.
10.Dogs understand what "no" means
11.Dogs understand if some of their friends cannot come inside.
12.Dogs think you are a culinary genius.
13.You can force a dog to take a bath.
14.Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.
15.Dogs don't mind if you do all the driving.
16.Dogs admit it when they're lost.
17.Dogs do not care whether you shave your legs.
18.Dogs take care of their own needs.
19.Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.
20.Dogs are nice to your relatives.
I've been thinking about something similar since this morning when I read the original post and the somewhat miffed responses, but you beat me to it, and your list is way funnier than mine!
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