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She is 14, deaf and has cataracts and separation anxiety I have always had a love/hate relationship with her and never imagined it would be hard for us to put her down when it was time. We live on five acres so have always been able to let her run free pretty much of the time. Recently, however, we have realized that she spends time in the neighbors yard and wouldn't come when called so now always have her on a leash when we take her out. She is skiddish and wanders around the house as if she is anxious or nervous. Sometimes she growls or whines for no apparent reason. We give her a baby aspirin at night to help relieve pain. She struggles getting up the tree steps to the porch. Sometimes she eats too fast and then vomits it up in the house. She has accidents but "goes" outside most of the time but I am tired of her ruining my carpets and cleaning up after her. When my 11 month old granddaughter visited at Christmas we kept them separated because I don't trust the dog with the baby. Baby is coming to visit again this weekend and I am not looking forward to that. When we have to isolate the dog she barks loudly and scratches on the door. She has completely ruined the door frame. When my son comes he brings his dog along and again we must keep the dogs separate. She's had a long life and has been taken care of. I don't believe dogs have souls or that there is a doggy heaven so am not sure why I am struggling with this. I have no desire to be with her when she is put down. Hope you don't think I am sounding cruel here. I feel like if I call the vet to make an appointment for her I will have to explain my reasoning for wanting to put her down and frankly I am not sure is she is ready, but I know I am.
Well, I get the impression you are pretty old school when it comes to pet dogs. That is not meant at all as a harsh judgement toward you, just an observation that informs the opinion I'll offer. I don't think you have much left to offer this dog in life. She is certainly suffering to a degree, and that is always one factor we take into account when making end of life decisions for our pets. I think if you were a different sort of dog owner and had a different history / relationship with your dog, there might be some quality of life remaining for your dog. But as things stand, I do not believe you'd be making the wrong decision to relieve her of her misery and confusion. You are right that 14 years is a decent lifespan for a Lab mix. I know you say you do not wish to be by her side when she's PTS. I wish I knew whether your dog would want you there or not. I'd tell you to do what you know your dog would want as far as that goes.
One thing I beg and urge you to consider: please don't get another dog after this. Keep these feelings and experiences you've expressed here in the front of your mind any time you're tempted to own a dog again in the future. It's just not for everyone. Plus you've got young kids and other dogs coming around. Just get your cuteness and doggie fix from those sources, not another dog of your own.
You might want to at least look into placing your dog in a hospice foster rescue or a sanctuary. You may not have much luck finding an opening, but I'd at least research options and possibly go this route if you find a suitable set up for your dog.
I have no desire to be with her when she is put down. Hope you don't think I am sounding cruel here. I feel like if I call the vet to make an appointment for her I will have to explain my reasoning for wanting to put her down and frankly I am not sure is she is ready, but I know I am.
A cruel person would just let her suffer or roam to be hit by a car. But you are definitely NOT what most of us would call a Dog Lover. And one does not have to believe in any kind of an afterlife to have great love and concern for our sick old dogs. Or to be there for their final exit. And yes a good vetr will want to know why you want to PTS, thank god. Just explain the quality of life for your old dog is not good and you don't want her to suffer any more. Don't mention how much you dislike her and want to be free from the responsibility.
Do what you know you want to do and please do not get another dog. You are not a dog person.
Well, I get the impression you are pretty old school when it comes to pet dogs. That is not meant at all as a harsh judgement toward you, just an observation that informs the opinion I'll offer. I don't think you have much left to offer this dog in life. She is certainly suffering to a degree, and that is always one factor we take into account when making end of life decisions for our pets. I think if you were a different sort of dog owner and had a different history / relationship with your dog, there might be some quality of life remaining for your dog. But as things stand, I do not believe you'd be making the wrong decision to relieve her of her misery and confusion. You are right that 14 years is a decent lifespan for a Lab mix. I know you say you do not wish to be by her side when she's PTS. I wish I knew whether your dog would want you there or not. I'd tell you to do what you know your dog would want as far as that goes.
One thing I beg and urge you to consider: please don't get another dog after this. Keep these feelings and experiences you've expressed here in the front of your mind any time you're tempted to own a dog again in the future. It's just not for everyone. Plus you've got young kids and other dogs coming around. Just get your cuteness and doggie fix from those sources, not another dog of your own.
You might want to at least look into placing your dog in a hospice foster rescue or a sanctuary. You may not have much luck finding an opening, but I'd at least research options and possibly go this route if you find a suitable set up for your dog.
I agree with everything above. I can think of many things that could possibly help your dog have a few more months or even years of good quality time. There are treatments for pain, incontinence and confusion. But all of these require a commitment, both financial in terms of taking the dog in for tests and time/energy.
If you're not willing to make that commitment, it is better for the dog if you euthanize. And it is better to do so before you begin resenting the animal.
I also agree that you should not get another pet in the future. If you don't believe that dogs have souls, then you'll understand what I mean when I say the dog doesn't know or care if you love them. To a dog, love is secondary to your ability to be responsible. Responsibility is a commitment. If you can't carry through being responsible, a pet isn't for you. That's not a sign of cruelty, or a reflection on you as a moral or good person! But in this one area, you are not able to carry through on a commitment, and that knowledge is a positive thing. If you did obtain another animal, that animal may experience health problems much earlier in life, or may simply not click with you.
With all of that said, you've provided a better home for this dog than the dog might have had otherwise in many situations, and that is something to feel positive about. If your dog is friendly and comfortable with strangers, I would not feel guilty over not staying during the euthanasia. If, however, your dog is nervous and uncomfortable at the vet's, you should have someone stay with the dog, even if that means a friend volunteers.
Keep in mind that some vets will do home visits to PTS...that may be a middle ground option where the dog is euthanized in familiar surroundings but without your presence.
I also agree with the above. You are not a bad person, nor cruel. A bad or cruel person would simply drop her off at a shelter and speed off. However, I don't think dogs are right for you full-time. Your son has a dog, which should be enough or you can always temporarily foster dogs when you have that desire. I don't really believe there is an after life for humans, but I still value human life equally if not more than say the average Christian. I would at the very least be with her while she is put to sleep though. Good luck to you.
I hope you, your spouse or one of your kids never become so sick that they "ruin your carpets" or "cry & moan for no reason" and their caretaker feels they way about you or your family members like how you feel about your poor sick dog.
Everyone who posted is right.
DON'T get another dog, cat or ANY animal in the future..
Then you can keep your beautiful house beautiful.
I think you were brave to post this on a dog-lover's forum. I would be sick to read this if your dog was only 8 or 10, but your dog is 14, has cataracts, is destructive when confined, can't be trusted with your grandchildren, is ruining your carpets and it sounds like you live a busy life.
Personally, I think the best thing is to put her down as soon as possible. If you can't handle taking her, then have someone take her who she knows (a friend, relative or kindly neighbor)
We can all see that you are getting very resentful towards this old girl. I'm very glad that you haven't just dropped her off at a shelter or on the street. Even the kindest pet rescue is not a good option for this old girl. She will be terrified and confused.
I don't frown upon you for your post. Maybe once upon a time you enjoyed this dog because you kept her for 14 years. A lot of dogs don't have the comfort of being in a home that long.
Time to let go, but if and when you ever consider getting another dog, please think back about this dog and I think you will agree that having another dog in your life isn't a good idea.
OP, please contact a rescue in your area...or a hospice. Contact someone. See if there is anyone they know of who is willing to see this old girl through the final stages of her life. Possibly there is not - most of us who are willing to do end-of-life care have other animals and I'm not sure from your post if your dog is other-dog aggressive or not.
I'd just say - although you don't wish to be there for her final journey, if this is your decision, wouldn't you want something or someone familiar to hold your hand as you pass to the next dimension? It's the final gift of 10 minutes you have the ability to give. I think you will have more peace in your soul if you can spare that little bit of time from your life. Some people can't do it. I can't say I understand that completely, but I accept it. Perhaps your son, with whom she is somewhat familiar, would be willing to walk that last mile with her?
While I cannot say I agree with your reasoning, I will say - please give this old girl a painless, sweet, and somewhat loving departure from this world. I'm thinking after 14 years you must have some sort of compassion for her. She has lived a long life with you. The door frame and carpet are already gone so there's no need to grieve that - rather grieve the passing of a spirit, whether you believe it goes on or not.
Personally OP from reading your other posts........you seem to be tired of a lot of things in your life. Old dogs are the hardest to take care of, but a lot of behavior comes from none training or boredom. Although she's old she still thrives for the attention as a pup would. I'd call around and see if anyone would be willing to take her, but how confusing would that be for her?? I do understand your vet issue since most vets are into saving our old pets these days, it's hard to get a vet to put an animal down. I'm dealing with this now with my 17 yr old cat, twice a day changing his cat box and the urine smell at times is just "STINKY"..........he tends to throw up off and on I do have tile and wood floors, this is much better than carpet. He has been such a good cat and I feel this is a part of the cycle and I knew this going into having a cat this long. He's only been to the vet for vaccines and has been a great hunter and boss of the house.
What you might do is have her more confined to a part of the house that your not so worried about if she were to make a mess and give her her last days of comfort......but as I see I don't think this is your state of mind and probably finding a vet to put her down would be the most humane way to go. When talking to the vet let him know you prefer to not be there they will have their employees provide her comfort, even if it's from strangers. Wishing you all the best with your dog and your.........
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Old dogs are the hardest to take care of, but a lot of behavior comes from none training or boredom. Although she's old she still thrives for the attention as a pup would. I'd call around and see if anyone would be willing to take her, but how confusing would that be for her?? I do understand your vet issue since most vets are into saving our old pets these days, it's hard to get a vet to put an animal down. I'm dealing with this now with my 17 yr old cat, twice a day changing his cat box and the urine smell at times is just "STINKY"
..........he tends to throw up off and on I do have tile and wood floors, this is much better than carpet. He has been such a good cat and I feel this is a part of the cycle and I knew this going into having a cat this long. He's only been to the vet for vaccines and has been a great hunter and boss of the house.
