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Old 11-07-2007, 07:48 PM
 
Location: Loss Wages
1,311 posts, read 5,994,440 times
Reputation: 562

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tama View Post
I have to agree with Irishmom--This is an unbelieveable situation. How can anyone expect a dog to go with only a morning walk? This lack of awareness does need to be addressed to the OP. The lack of time spent with the poor animal is another point. Even if the defecating is resolved with pads and it seems that is the only option, what happens to the dog sitting in an apartment all day, day after day? Get this dog a loving home and get a cat or two. They would be much better able to handle this situation.
I would hope that giving the dog away would be the last resort. I believe compromise can help this situation, but it will take time and planning. I wouldn't give up hope just yet.
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Old 11-07-2007, 08:20 PM
 
Location: Florida
1,738 posts, read 7,496,855 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jheramish View Post
Hi, this is going to be kind of long but there's a lot of backstory. Please bear with me, I need help!
I have a three year old rottweiler/poodle mix. When I got him, my family lived in Long Island where we have a big backyard. He was never actually housebroken because we would just let him run around the backyard randomly. He would have accidents in the house sometimes but there were seldom consequences. I moved to the city a few months ago and brought my dog with me. I started a routine with him to walk him first thing in the morningn and at 10p before we settled in for the night. It was working well but then about two weeks into it my schedule at work changed so I could only do the night walk every other day. This didnt seem to cause too much of a change, he still had an accident once in a while but rarely. About six weeks ago I came down with bronchitis and pneumonia so I would walk him in the morning but by the time I got home in the afternoons I just couldnt make it up and down from my sixth floor walkup apt. My boyfriend would walk him when he was over at that time but this was sporadic. He's been having accidents increasingly since then. Its gotten to the point where I fully expect to find a mess when I get home from work everyday. When I do I take him over and I say "NO!! NO!!" and hit him (not overly hard) on the nose. I know you're only supposed to admonish them when you catch them in the act, but I can't think what else to do.

Can someone please suggest a way I can get him to stop going in the house while I'm gone - if I'm home all day he won't have an accident, even if he's only been walked in the morning. Evening walks are becoming less frequent so I know I'm partially to blame but it can't be helped. I've been trying to make up for it by taking him out for longer in the morning but I'm out of the house for at least 12 hours each day, sometimes 14 (work, gym, etc). Also is there a better way to get across to him that he can't go in the house if I come home and find an accident? I am open to anything at this point, even using newspaper or pads as long as it won't make my small apt smell like a kennel. I love my dog and I HATE how scared/sad he gets when he gets punished for having an accident and I surely don't want to send him to Long Island where I'll only see him every once in a while. Thank you, thank you thank you for any help
ok, I'm gonna fuss and I'm sure other people have addressed this BUT ...for one you don't hit dogs on the nose ...what if I hit you in the face???? ...the BUTT PLEASE and it's not for pain, it's to get the dogs attention ...you could damage his nose!!!!!!! He's gonna be scared of your hands, arms and voice if you do this and when you go to pet him he's gonna hide from you and I promise it's a horrible feeling. We have a rescue who use to hide from our hands because of previous abuse.
and how can you punish a dog for going to the bathroom after that many hours? ohhh and spanking him(which I'm not totally for) when he's already stressed is going to lead to more accidents in the house

I think about it like this ...having a dog is like having a two year old who slows down as he gets older. they are fun, smart and silly, but you never expect perfection from a toddler, why a dog?

Second why do you have a dog if you only let it out every 10 hours? ...what's the point? you don't see the dog. I think you need to find him a new home, this isn't fair to the dog. he's going in the house because he can't hold it AND because he's alone for such long periods of time.
I honestly have to ask are you thinking logically? ...it's a living thing, it will go toxic if it holds is pee or poo for that long on a normal basis.

This is unexceptable. sorry to be mean, I'm not mean, but this is neglect in my mind

Last edited by kelly3120; 11-07-2007 at 08:32 PM..
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Old 11-07-2007, 09:34 PM
 
Location: Jax
8,204 posts, read 32,160,564 times
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It just seems that at this time, your lifestyle is not set up for a dog.

I understand the schedule and the long hours, and I understand living in Harlem (possibly priced out of Manhattan?), and I understand that it's impossible for you to go home on your lunch hour (you'd never make it there and back in an hour)......I get all these things. I even get that you have to go to the gym in Manhattan before coming home to Harlem.

But I also get that you're in a 6-floor walk-up, which means you have no backyard (unless by chance there's a shared space) and you didn't mention taking your dog to the park each day, only taking him outside to relieve himself.

I've seen large dogs living this way in NYC and it is no kind of life.
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Old 11-08-2007, 08:41 AM
 
Location: Loss Wages
1,311 posts, read 5,994,440 times
Reputation: 562
Quote:
Originally Posted by kelly3120 View Post
ok, I'm gonna fuss and I'm sure other people have addressed this BUT ...for one you don't hit dogs on the nose ...what if I hit you in the face???? ...the BUTT PLEASE and it's not for pain, it's to get the dogs attention ...you could damage his nose!!!!!!! He's gonna be scared of your hands, arms and voice if you do this and when you go to pet him he's gonna hide from you and I promise it's a horrible feeling. We have a rescue who use to hide from our hands because of previous abuse.
and how can you punish a dog for going to the bathroom after that many hours? ohhh and spanking him(which I'm not totally for) when he's already stressed is going to lead to more accidents in the house

I think about it like this ...having a dog is like having a two year old who slows down as he gets older. they are fun, smart and silly, but you never expect perfection from a toddler, why a dog?

Second why do you have a dog if you only let it out every 10 hours? ...what's the point? you don't see the dog. I think you need to find him a new home, this isn't fair to the dog. he's going in the house because he can't hold it AND because he's alone for such long periods of time.
I honestly have to ask are you thinking logically? ...it's a living thing, it will go toxic if it holds is pee or poo for that long on a normal basis.

This is unexceptable. sorry to be mean, I'm not mean, but this is neglect in my mind
Kelly makes a lot of good points.
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Old 11-08-2007, 12:23 PM
 
1,257 posts, read 4,051,598 times
Reputation: 1013
My dogs go to daycare when I am at work. If not, I know someone made a box for her dog to use. She built a wood box. The bottom layer is sand, then pebble and sand. On top, a layer for artificial grass pad (used often for in door golf course). Her dog is fully house broken and refuses to use it. Since my dog can pee on command (I have to mention her), I brought my dog into her apartment and order my dog pee on it. It takes several try but her dog finally got the idea. She left the box on her balcony and refreshed the content of her box weekly until her schedule changed back to normal.

Your dog may be stressed out by the new environment. Please do not hit your dog. It is not going to solve any problem.
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Old 11-08-2007, 01:53 PM
 
Location: ¡Ninguno de su negocio!
570 posts, read 1,677,492 times
Reputation: 217
I agree with all the posters on here. Living in an apartment, the only option you have is to leave down pads for the dog to relieve himself. It will do the animal harm in the long run if you expect him to "hold it" for 14 hours a day. I couldn't imagine doing that to my two dogs. As another poster said, if you are barely home, what is the point of having the dog. After the "bathroom" situation is taken care of, there is still the problem of you being gone for long periods of time and I hope you are leaving the radio on for him to keep him company during the day. I believe that is selfish to have him locked up in an apartment like that all day when he can be living in a house with a backyard in Long Island and have space. If you decide to keep him, I would strongly suggest getting a second dog so he can have someone to keep him company while your gone. I can tell that may not be an option as you already have enough on your plate. So IMO, the only option you have it to send that poor animal back to LIC, I think his welfare is more important in this situation.
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Old 11-08-2007, 02:51 PM
 
Location: Loss Wages
1,311 posts, read 5,994,440 times
Reputation: 562
You know, we all have said a lot, but I'm curious to find out how things are going with the original poster. We haven't had much response since the beginning.

Please let us know and any other questions I'm sure there are people here that are more than willing to help you out.
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Old 11-10-2007, 09:00 AM
 
1,350 posts, read 3,612,910 times
Reputation: 1264
If the OP is still checking in, do let us know what you decided to do. We care about the welfare of your dog. I thought about something that might help. How about a barter? Could you find someone in your vicinity, maybe in the same building who could take the boy out at least once in the afternoon and you could return the favor? You could perhaps run errands, grocery shop, or offer transport help on the weekend to someone who could do this for you but needs help in these other areas. Maybe putting up an attractive poster on some bulletin boards in your area or at an online community web site. The poster could have a oicture of your boy with a caption like "Can you help this guy?" on the top.
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Old 02-19-2008, 08:42 PM
 
1 posts, read 2,169 times
Reputation: 10
Thumbs down getalife

We now live in a society where people feel the constant need to judge others. Many of these people seem to believe that they are superperfect. For example, when a parent taps a child on the buttocks in a supermarket, the superperfect parents judge that parent as abusive. It is only because current laws regarding discipline support this view and provide the superperfect with a louder voice. Yet, on the other hand, the less than perfect parent believes that this kind of discipline might help encourage their children to respect property and others. For instance, I find that nowadays children in public places are usually unruly: In restaurants, parents don't stop them from playing with the ketchup, from putting their feet in the chairs others have to use, and from running all over the place. This is disturbing. And parents don't correct them. There are both sides to every point of view I am sure.

With this person's dog situation, she might not trust anyone to enter her home to care for the dog. She simply requested a solution to her particular circumstances. And the majority suggested that she get rid of her dog. Would you have suggested that she get rid of her kids because she worked too much? No! I'm sure that someone answering this blog will mention as a rebuttal that you don't leave kids alone, you send them to daycare and therefore she needs daycare for her dog. If the weewee pads are a safe option, then why not suggest it instead of judging that person. You don't get rid of your kids because you work too many hours and because they are too expensive. You/the parent must deal with the shortcomings.

Some people have the luxury of staying at home while their kids grow. Others don't. Instead, they may have to work many hours just to pay for the day care. Can we fairly say that the stay-at-home mom is better than the working mom? It's a question for debate. The problem with superperfect people is that they believe everyone else is similarly situated with time, money, and resources. And when they are not, then these superperfect people suggest that the not-so-similarly-situated people not enjoy similar privileges.

If you thought she should not keep the dog, simply say: It seems like you don't have time, think about finding a different home. Don't judge! It is out of line to suggest that her intentions are warped. I don't think it is fair to call her neglectful or illogical. Using weewee pads is far from neglectful. If they were a source of neglect, why are they manufactured? They will allow the dog to relieve itself in the absence of a pet door or dog walker. How do you know that the dog wants to leave her home?


One of my friends has a dog and she works many hours. I can tell you that she is a dog lover to the bone. She doesn't have any kids and states that her dog is her child. She bakes homemade dog biscuits for her dog. She was so dedicated to her dogs of many years that when they died, she took several days off. During which time, she made a point to carry her dogs to the cremation sites to watch the process so that the ashes would be rightfully provided. She is the most loving person towards her animal that I know. Her work hours don't stop her from treating her current dog better than she treats herself. I don't judge her because she works a lot. No one else will support her if she doesn't work. Not everyone can afford the same services some of you suggest. But that doesn't mean they cannot own a dog, that the dog will be neglected or abused. Every person and circumstance is different. There is no objective way to raise a dog.

This superperfect attitude masks the real crisis in our country. The United States's status as a hegemony is currently at stake. Keeping their heads in the air helps the superperfect to believe that every thing is okay. In some other countries, people don't have dog walkers, but they still own dogs and work. What would you do if this recession caused you to lose some of the privileges that you currently enjoy? Would you get rid of your dog?

Last edited by getalife; 02-19-2008 at 09:35 PM.. Reason: my spelling erros
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Old 02-20-2008, 12:39 AM
 
Location: St. Augustine, Florida
1,930 posts, read 9,458,381 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jheramish View Post
I work a ten hour day all the way down in midtown and I live all the way uptown in Harlem where there are no day cares or dogwalking services. My schedule cannot be helped and my gym time is doctor imposed - not that it's any of your bussiness. I spend every second I can with my dog and since he's started living with me I go straight home (no more after work drinks or parties on the weekends). I know he can hold it because he does when I'm home with him. I was home sick for a week and we would walk in the morning and he would be fine all day.

instead of wagging your finger at me, could you suggest an alternative (pads, etc) since I WILL be out of the house for at least 12 hours a day?

for the record, he is not "locked up", I don't crate him and he has free reign of the 400 sf apartment including his own puppy corner in the living room with his nap bed and a plethora of toys.

please only reply if you are indeed going to be helpful as I am taking this quite seriously and don't really have time to waste with people just being negative.
If you know he can hold it for that long, which frankly is hard for me to believe because none of my dogs can hold it for that long, it might be that he is having some separation anxiety. All 3 of our dogs had very bad separation anxiety for a while and they would do everything they normally wouldn't do. Dogs are pack animals and it's not normal for one member of the pack to be left alone, so it's natural for dogs to not want to be alone. But if they have separation anxiety, that's not good. It's very stressful for the dog which is not healthy, and it's very stressful for the owner because they have to deal with what all the dog has done. If you think it might be from separation anxiety, there are ways to help with that. For our dogs, we would go out the front door for a few minutes and then come back in, go out for another few minutes and then come back in. We did that a few times each time, and we didn't make a big deal of us leaving or coming back in. We would stay outside a little bit longer each time as well, and after a while, we would go somewhere for a hour or two and then come back. We just did that several times, each day, though out the day until they got over it. It takes a while, but after several days, or even a few weeks, they realize that every time you leave, you will be coming back. I think they think they are being abandoned, so I definitely don't blame them for getting stressed out! But yeah, dog with separation anxiety will go potty inside, even if they can hold it, they will tear the house up, etc, etc, etc. If he's not destroying the house, I wouldn't say he has terrible separation anxiety, so it might not take too long for him to get over it, but each dog is different, so you never know.

It could just be that he really can't hold it, and in that case, if there is no way for him to be let out during the day, all I can think to suggest is potty pads.
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