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Last night, I fell asleep easily -- I was so drained. I woke up at 1-something in the height of night with a knot in my stomach and my face was wet with tears. I suppose that I was crying in my sleep. I started thinking about what I saw on Friday night and I felt sick. I finally got back to sleep at 4-something.
I spent the day doing laundry -- all the blankets that Artie had furred up -- and dealing with his things. Boy, he had a lot of stuff. I guess I indulged him a bit. That makes me happy.
At about 4 P.M., I lay down and ended up falling asleep. About 30 minutes later, I woke with a jolt with this thought: "It's after 11 in the morning and I didn't give Artie his late-morning chicken jerky treat yet!!!!"
Rough day. I know that it'll get easier though. Even though my heart is in crumbles, my head knows that I did right by Artie, giving him peace.
I remember my night after I lost Munchi. I was alone in a hotel in Virginia after transporting two of the rescue puppies to adopters. I woke in the middle of the night sobbing. I was reliving it all over again. It's been seven months now and to this day I find myself waking up crying, reliving it all over. Things during the day trigger those memories and I'll have to re-direct my brain.
It takes time to get past it. It's a pain that is incredibly deep. I never, ever thought I could love anything or anyone as much as I loved her. The loss cuts you to the core. I totally understand how you feel. I'm so, so sorry. I just wish there were magic words that could take away the pain and the bad memories and only leave you with the happy ones. Hugs my wonderful friend.
I couldn't say it any better than mrs 1885 just did. It's so incredibly hard. And it will always come back and hit you at odd times, but those times will get farther apart. They really will be replaced by more of the good memories, of Artie's special ways and the good times you were able to give him. xoxo
It takes a loving heart to make a decision that's truly best for your dog instead of procrastinating because of your own loss and pain. You did that brilliantly. Please take comfort in the conviction that you gave him glorious years that he wouldn't have had with anyone else. You gave him a second chance and a whole second life. No matter how much we love we can't do more than that!
Blessing and comfort to you, and peace to Artie. (((hugs)))
Oh Dawn, I'm so sorry I haven't been on here in so long. My heart goes out to you and what you are going through. You absolutely did what was best for Artie. No one could have loved the little guy more than you. He is a peace now, resting, watching over you with content. Hugs to you.
Hi Dawn, I just found this thread. Sorry to learn about Artie, but your tribute to him was so beautiful. I'll bet it was the hardest decision you'll ever have to make in your lifetime, but rest assured, it was the right decision. Hugs to you.
Dawn, I haven't been online much for the past eight or nine months...and I had no idea.
I am so sorry...
I am typing this with tears streaming down my face for you, your loss...and for Artie. You have been ever so loving with him and when we face these incredible difficult decisions, it will never get any easier. I will miss your stories of Artie.
Please know, you are in my thoughts and prayers. ((Hugs))
Location: Montreal -> CT -> MA -> Montreal -> Ottawa
17,330 posts, read 33,013,815 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LuvABull.Denver
Dawn, I haven't been online much for the past eight or nine months...and I had no idea.
I am so sorry...
I am typing this with tears streaming down my face for you, your loss...and for Artie. You have been ever so loving with him and when we face these incredible difficult decisions, it will never get any easier. I will miss your stories of Artie.
Please know, you are in my thoughts and prayers. ((Hugs))
~LuvABull
I haven't been responding on this thread -- I've been saying a few words in rep comments -- but it seems that I repped you too recently to give you another. This is what I was going to write: I love you for every word that you just wrote here. Thank you. xxo
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