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Let me state this up-front--I am NOT trolling. Really, I am not. I have stated certain anti-dog positions in here and other places before, but I am speaking of things such as people with dogs that bark and bother the neighbors yet do nothing about it.
That, however, does not mean I am a dog hater and I sure am not in here to bash dogs so much, but rather to vent and/or ask questions about tendencies many of them have which annoy me, to the point that I'd just assume not have a dog at all. Trouble is, the wife wants a dog--she doesn't love dogs more than she loves me, but she just really wants to have one. I'm all for compromise, but certain dog tendencies bug me so much I don't think I can.
The main thing is this--I'm not a social person where it regards pets, nor do I care for the upkeep that's necessary. When I'm home, either I'm spending time with my wife and kids or I'm doing solitary things like reading etc. I have ZERO interest in having to clean a litter box for a cat, or walk a dog twice a day, or deal with whining or barking, or a dog being in the house making messes. I just want to do what I do and be left completely alone.
Cats work great for me that way, yet even they can get on my nerves--I expect my kitchen tables to be left alone I DON'T CARE if I have 25 cans of tuna fish on the table, I STILL expect it to be left alone.
In our case, if we are to have a dog, it is going to need to live in a designated fenced-in area that's about 50 feet in diameter, except when the kids are in there playing with it or my wife etc, or if I'm walking it, which I can be compelled to do maybe twice a week. It needs to not bark or whine, and it needs to not be so upset about being in the fenced-in area and trying to get out. It needs to ACCEPT that situation, and keep its mouth shut, or it can't stay here.
Instead, in past occasions where we tried (thankfully the owners left open the option of returning the dog & I did so), the dog has always fought tooth & nail to be out of the fenced-in area, sometimes even when the kids are in there playing with it. The fence wasn't that well built and it can escape, and then I end up keeping it tied, which I don't want to do, but I don't want it out of that fenced-in area either.
Yet if it does get out it typically just hangs around the house anyway, which begs the question--if that's all it's going to do, why make such a fuss about wanting out? Why does it care so much? What's the big deal? What is it about a fence that makes a dog want so badly to be out of it? It seems as if you could have 100 acres that's fenced in, and all they want to do is be right on the other side of that fence maybe 15 inches from it, never mind that it has 100 acres at its disposal. That makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.
However, the dog MUST be in that fenced-in area for a few reasons. One, I don't want it bugging me if I'm in the remainder of the yard doing my own thing--again, I just don't any interest in socializing with them all the time like that. I like to shoot baskets at a basketball hoop we have, I don't want it bothering me then getting all under my ankles. I don't even want it bothering me if I'm sitting in a chair reading a book or talking to myself.
Two, we're about 100 yards from a busy road, and although we have probably 60 acres of woods behind us they could explore without restrictions, they will ALWAYS head STRAIGHT to the road, EVERY TIME. Again, that's stupid to me--you have 60 acres of woods you can explore, but you head straight for a road 100 yards away that's going to kill you? That's STUPID. Also, another neighbor is in that stretch, and I don't want it going in their yard causing them problems or getting their dog all wound up with hysterical barking that will ruin my peace & quiet.
If they had the sense to go towards the rear with that huge patch of woods, it would be fine, I'd not even bother with a fence, but no--they never do. (That area also happens to be where I walk them when I do so.) If they couldn't escape the fence, I wouldn't tie them--but then, they'd probably be whining forever right at the edge, forever ignoring the 50 feet around them they are FREE to explore, and that noise is something that I just can't take. Also, these often have been smallish dogs, where 50 feet ought to be PLENTY.
Simply enough, I have NO patience in dealing with that. And this is the thing--my wife may be the one who pushes to have the dog, but it will be ME taking care of it, and that includes feeding it too. She will play with it some, but dogs are social creatures & need LOTS of play, more than I care to give it, and even the play she gives it isn't much, although the play the kids give it may be.
If our fenced-in area didn't drive them crazy or was better built to where they couldn't escape it, and they behaved and kept quiet and just stayed in there peacefully, it would be okay. As it is, I end up paying more attention to any such dogs than she does, even though those aspect aggravate me so much, and even though she was the one who wanted it so badly to start with. The initial "showroom factor" fades with her, and the owner takes them back. All along I'm thinking--why bother? Why not just accept that our life doesn't fit and stop trying, it's only going to go back to the owner anyway?
So, with that long story done, my questions are:
(1) Why do dogs fight so hard to be out of a fenced-in area, no matter how large it is?
(2) Why do they ALWAYS go towards the dangerous road & neighbor's yards while totally ignoring 60-odd acres of prime woods they can be totally free in?
(3) Lastly--would this scenario perhaps be solved by installing an underground fence? Some tell me those don't really work, others swear by them.
For the record, we do have 1 dog that we've had for the past 3 years (again at HER prodding) and it's adapted to this environment, although I have to tie it when I'm not walking it. I walk it periodically & it's joyfully happy when I do so, when I return & tie it up it's totally fine. (Again, though, anytime I don't tie him, he's at the road or the neighbor's yard, NEVER going to the rear woods as I've mentioned. If he'd stay in the 50 foot fenced-area, I'd leave him untied.)
Well I was able to read about one forth of that before I came to the conclusion that you do not need to own a dog.
Get real.
Two things--first, I know MANY people who are very dog-loving but they do have a fenced-in section of their yard & their dogs are expected to stay in there. The only difference between me & them is I can become crochety when they protest. I still walk them periodically, though.
Second, regardless, if you read the post more than 1/4 (granted, it was long), you will read my observation that frankly I'd be just fine not having one, I edited the post but before doing so I basically said that it's just as well I not own a dog period, because I'm just not the dog type really. That would suit me fine. I have no problem with the observation that someone like me would be best off just not having one. The problem is the wife wants one ANYWAY, rather than accepting that she married me knowing full well I'm not really a dog person (I was always clear about that from day one) & while compromise is a good thing the things dogs do that annoy me aren't going to just magically go away.
This is funny.
We have a German Pinscher, 14 years old neutered male.
When we are home he is whining because he wants to be somewhere else. When we get in the car he is whining because he wants to go the park. When we are at the park he is whining because he wants to be on the other side of the lake. When we are done and on the way home he is whining because he wants to check on the yard. When he gets to the yard he is whining when we lock the dog door because he wants to be in the living room. Once in the living room he goes out again, in and out, probably twice per minute.
That dog never learned to be content with the day.
Then we have a Manchester Terrier, 12 years old neutered male.
When I sit in my easy chair the Manchie sits next to me until he eventually ends up in my lap. When I go to the bathroom he follows me so he can sit at my side. When I take him to the park and let him off leash, he walks next to me because that is his favorite place to be. When I take a nap during the day, he gets on the couch with me and as happy there snoring away as any dog I had ever seen.
The thing is, dogs come in different personalities: they are not much different from humans in this respect.
My advice to the OP is this: I dated over forty ladies before getting married to one. I'm not sure you can do this with dogs, even if it might be less expensive, but it's worth a try.
Last edited by mgforshort; 01-24-2014 at 06:20 PM..
(1) Why do dogs fight so hard to be out of a fenced-in area, no matter how large it is?
because dogs are PACK animals and want to be with their pack, YOU...THE FAMILY, PEOPLE who are supposed to love it...a fenced in yard with a little attention here and there and ignored the rest is the equivalent of solitary confinemtn, its MENTAL ABUSE to a creature that's got a very SOCIAL NATURE
(2) Why do they ALWAYS go towards the dangerous road & neighbor's yards while totally ignoring 60-odd acres of prime woods they can be totally free in?
because dogs are PACK animals and want to be with their pack, YOU...THE FAMILY, PEOPLE who are supposed to love it...a fenced in yard with a little attention here and there and ignored the rest is the equivalent of solitary confinemtn, its MENTAL ABUSE to a creature that's got a very SOCIAL NATURE
it doesn't want to run in the woods, it wants to be WITH PEOPLE...and since apparently you have no interest giving the dog the attention it needs its going to find its way to OTHER PEOPLE...(or other dogs) which are usually at neighbors houses along roads...
(3) Lastly--would this scenario perhaps be solved by installing an underground fence? Some tell me those don't really work, others swear by them.
NO...dogs with strong drive will run right through them...and it doesn't prevent other animals from entering the yard and potentially hurting your dog...
even dogs that don't want to be in the house, don't WANT to be out alone...they want to be doing things WITH YOU...
sounds to me the only pet you need is a rock...even a goldfish sounds like it would be too needy for your lifestyle.
Not everyone enjoys having a pet, it doesn't seem like a good fit for you so why worry about it. Your wife may want the wonderful companionship for a dog, you want to deny her that, don't worry about giving her something she desires we women just get over that stuff with out any problems. I'm sure it will be just fine in your world.
This is funny.
We have a German Pinscher, 14 years old neutered male.
When we are home he is whining because he wants to be somewhere else. When we get in the car he is whining because he wants to go the park. When we are at the park he is whining because he wants to be on the other side of the lake. When we are done and on the way home he is whining because he wants to check on the yard. When he gets to the yard he is whining when we lock the dog door because he wants to be in the living room. Once in the living room he goes out again, in and out, probably twice per minute.
That dog never learned to be content with the day.
Then we have a Manchester Terrier, 12 years old neutered male.
When I sit in my easy chair the Manchie sits next to me until he eventually ends up in my lap. When I go to the bathroom he follows me so he can sit at my side. When I take him to the park and let him off leash, he walks next to me because that is his favorite place to be. When I take a nap during the day, he gets on the couch with me and as happy there snoring away as any dog I had ever seen.
The thing is, dogs come in different personalities: they are not much different from humans in this respect.
My advice to the OP is this: I dated over forty ladies before getting married to one. I'm not sure you can do this with dogs, even if it might be less expensive, but it's worth a try.
When you stated that you dated 40 women before getting married & it might be worth a try to do that with dogs, that is what I think my wife is doing. You see, we did sometime back have this one dog & I mean it was PERFECT. It hardly ever did anything that annoyed me, EVER (especially barking or throwing a fit over having to stay inside the fenced area in general), and it was extremely obedient. That dog was so obedient I'd take it for walks on quiet country roads & when other people's dogs would start barking at it, instead of him running to them & engaging with them fighting them back etc, he'd obey me and stay by my side and ignore them. I didn't even have to use a leash or keep yelling "get back here," I said it once the first time we had such an outing and NEVER had to repeat myself.
THAT is my kind of dog.
We had it for several years & when we had to have it put asleep I was actually somewhat upset about it.
I think my wife is hoping such another dog will turn up for us, whereas I don't want to keep repeatedly getting a dog only to have to carry it back, I'm a highly picky person & I figure that 1 dog was a 1 in a million sort of thing I'll likely never see again. While I enjoyed having it, I'm not burning with the desire to have another dog, I'm fine as I am, and most of all I do really figure that dog was a 1 in a million perfect type of dog I'll never see again. It would be like having been Michael Jordan's coach and then being frustrated that other basketball players aren't like him vs realizing others won't be and deciding to be okay with that & just appreciate the freak of nature he was.
As for the 1st dog you mentioned & his tendencies--that is exactly what I'm talking about in terms of me not being a dog person. First, I can't stand whining, you better not whine EVER unless your fur is on fire. "Separation anxiety"--I don't care, all I care about is the noise and that I don't like it. Second, I'm very much a "make up your mind" person, a dog that was going in & out I'd be one to tie it up outside to MAKE it stay outside vs going back & forth simply over the principle that I don't tolerate that sort of indecisiveness. I simply have ZERO tolerance for that sort of thing. I mean ZERO.
I realize dogs are social creatures, but I want them to fit MY life, not me fit theirs. People that have cats learn to not leave stuff on the kitchen table because the cat might eat it--me, I expect to leave whatever I darn well like on the kitchen table & could care less that a cat will be attracted to it, I STILL expect it to leave it alone. Most people that have dogs look forward to spending lots of time with them on a daily basis. I'm not into having something hover all over me for hours a day unless it's an attractive woman (in this case my wife). I pay attention to you when I FEEL like it, pester me into doing it more & I'll only resist even further. You are to fit MY life.
I am that way regarding anything pretty much. Anything that threatens to take over my life is sent packing. I'm just the tiniest bit nicer than Melvin Udall from "As Good As It Gets." I don't mind some minor tweaks here & there, but the minute such threatens to TAKE OVER my life, it's out of here or I restructure things if possible to right that wrong. I even am that way with our own kids, although to a lesser extent. To wit: I love my kids a lot & love on them a lot, but I keep the kiddie TV stuff in their room because I don't want Barney playing in the living room, we expect them to eat at restaurants we like half the time vs almost always eating at McDonald's, & we won't set foot in Disneyland because I'm not waiting in long lines. I very frequently send them outside to play not just because it's good for them (although it is) but also because I don't want them "underfoot" bugging me every 5 seconds thinking I'm their source of entertainment. (Also, any dogs we may have in that fenced-in area now have 2 little humans playing with them too.)
In other words, it's not that I'm not loving, I am, but I do it on MY terms as much as possible. I am willing to give a little, but I'm very cautious about not having it become too big of a thing to where it takes over my life, and pets have a tendency to take over your life, and to me they're optional, your children aren't.
That one dog fit me like a comfortable old shoe, so that was fine, if a would-be new dog was like him I'd gladly take him in. However, although dogs do come in differing personalities, I figure he was a 1 in a million, and I don't wish to subject myself OR THE DOGS EITHER to a trial & error process. I'd rather just leave things alone.
Go stay out there alone yourself in your 11 degree weather for a month and you'll probably understand better.
The problem is your WIFE not you - at least you admit what you are and how you think. She has no compassion given that she knows who she's married to.
You:
Quote:
I'm as serious as a heart attack, & absolutely serious when I say that I think I know better than nature itself how it ought to be if what nature is doing is going all over the place. In that case, I look at mother nature as a deity that's high on crack and needs to get its head out of its rear.
Joseph the German Shepherd was clinging to life when authorities rescued him. He was emaciated and dehydrated, his skin was covered with infection, and he had heart worms. Police say his owner left him chained to a tree for four straight years....
with no more than a few scraps of food and little water. Jadin says he was covered in fleas and painful bites.
Joseph's former owner, Jeremy Shane Temple, faces animal cruelty charges.
Chaining dogs is not the problem....it is idiot owners.
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