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Sometimes parents have given a lot of money to some children over the years, while other children have not needed it, so they try to even it out in their will.
More the opposite personally.
I've talked about that a little bit. House will, most likely, go to my sister. Rest split however. Probably 50/50. On the other hand as my mom's health begins to deteriorate, I'm not in a position to really take on a caregiver role. My sister is. We're not there yet, but it's foreseeable in 10 ten years and probable in 20. We're talking about smaller amounts of money. Most of mom's retirement will come from pensions, maybe a couple hundred thousand outside of it and the house depending on how much it gets drawn down in retirement. Inheriting 50 or 100k won't have any material difference in my life. It would in my sister's. Hopefully by then she's mature enough financially to keep it. If not at least it's not any of my problem.
All investments and current trusts are equal for my sister and I, and I would assume inheritance would be the same. My sister will waste most of her money I have no doubt about that but my dad is a really fair, patient man lol. Already whatever I have, I’ve grown in wealth, while my sister is renting a shoddy house because she can’t afford a down payment and has no credit because she ran up debts and didn’t repay them. She could have gotten the money to repay them but felt “too embarrassed” to do so, so apparently it’s better to ruin your credit and pay 20% interest instead.
I have a half-joking vision of her desperately needing to sell a 10% share in something that’s worth $2M and me buying out her share for $500,000 lol. Then four years later she’s out of money and I’m way richer. It wouldn’t surprise me. Maybe she’ll outlive her money, I hope, for her sake. It would be a LOT to blow through but I’ve learned never to underestimate my sister.
All investments and current trusts are equal for my sister and I, and I would assume inheritance would be the same. My sister will waste most of her money I have no doubt about that but my dad is a really fair, patient man lol. Already whatever I have, I’ve grown in wealth, while my sister is renting a shoddy house because she can’t afford a down payment and has no credit because she ran up debts and didn’t repay them. She could have gotten the money to repay them but felt “too embarrassed” to do so, so apparently it’s better to ruin your credit and pay 20% interest instead.
I have a half-joking vision of her desperately needing to sell a 10% share in something that’s worth $2M and me buying out her share for $500,000 lol. Then four years later she’s out of money and I’m way richer. It wouldn’t surprise me. Maybe she’ll outlive her money, I hope, for her sake. It would be a LOT to blow through but I’ve learned never to underestimate my sister.
Yeah, don’t underestimate those with no fiscal discipline. My dad died 26 years ago and left my brother and me 300k each. Took him about 3 years to blow it all. Then he spent the next 20+ years getting my mother (who was left VERY well off) to fritter her money away buying him houses, cars, trips, and paying for the last 10 years for all his and his wife’s living expenses. Why have a job when mommy will pay your bills.
The s**t hit the fan almost 2 years ago when she ran out of money. They came after me for my inheritance which I invested when I got it and haven’t spent a dime. After months of being called greedy and harassed almost daily, I cut them both out of my life for my own sanity. If your sis does the same and wastes her money, don’t let her make it your problem. If I had given in, they would have bled me dry and not cared a bit about the effect on me.
Yeah, don’t underestimate those with no fiscal discipline. My dad died 26 years ago and left my brother and me 300k each. Took him about 3 years to blow it all. Then he spent the next 20+ years getting my mother (who was left VERY well off) to fritter her money away buying him houses, cars, trips, and paying for the last 10 years for all his and his wife’s living expenses. Why have a job when mommy will pay your bills.
The s**t hit the fan almost 2 years ago when she ran out of money. They came after me for my inheritance which I invested when I got it and haven’t spent a dime. After months of being called greedy and harassed almost daily, I cut them both out of my life for my own sanity. If your sis does the same and wastes her money, don’t let her make it your problem. If I had given in, they would have bled me dry and not cared a bit about the effect on me.
Oh man..............I can see an ugly future with my wife's family. My MIL has named my wife and her oldest brother, the two oldest of her children, as Executors of her will. I don't know if they are Co-Executors, or primary and secondary based on age, or if she has really done anything other than talk about it. Regardless, child #4 is already furious as he sees himself as being the most qualified as executor with his MBA degree.
He is also in the midst of his second personal bankruptcy in six years, sold his home to stop the foreclosure proceedings against it, has zero cash reserves (even after selling his home), is currently in jail on three DUI charges in as many weeks, his wife is divorcing him, and his employer may decide my BIL is not worth the risk of retaining as an employee. 52 years old, no house, no money, County Jail as an address, potentially facing years in State Prison, and no job when released (if he goes to prison for an extended period).
But in his mind he is most qualified to be the Executor.
My MIL's only asset is the 30 year old mobile home in which she lives with the son she did include as Executor, with its $500/month lot rent and interior furnishings that came with the mobile home when it was new. My MIL may have transferred ownership of the mobile home in her Will to the son who has lived with her for 55 of his 58 years.
BTW - the perturbed child #4 earned his MBA degree during a prison stint and early release program 30 years ago.
my late husband and I decided against inheritances just for that reason. I absolutely hate the assumption that this country has that every thing in life with kids has to be "fair". and the kids expectation that they are "owed" something.
We have told our young adults children that our money is exactly that. OUR money. we have charities that we support and will leave the bulk of our estate to them.
During their life time they have gotten. college education without loans, cars, vacations and various financial help. Now they are going to get an attitude because they think their inheritances aren't fair?? are you kidding me!!
op, it's only a decisive issue if you make it one. Your parents left you a gift, they were under no obligation to do so.
Do my siblings' spouses get half of their inheritance?
One of my BILs makes comments about other women and thinks that flies with me - nah ah. My father was a born again Christian and I never once in my life saw my father make off-color comments about other women, he was faithful to my mother for 40 years, and he didn't view women as objects.
I'm not cool with this particular BIL saying other women are "hot" - I know how that feels to women as I did it when I was with past girlfriends and I know if broke their hearts.
I was just curious if he gets half of what my sister is getting?
Do my siblings' spouses get half of their inheritance?
One of my BILs makes comments about other women and thinks that flies with me - nah ah. My father was a born again Christian and I never once in my life saw my father make off-color comments about other women, he was faithful to my mother for 40 years, and he didn't view women as objects.
I'm not cool with this particular BIL saying other women are "hot" - I know how that feels to women as I did it when I was with past girlfriends and I know if broke their hearts.
I was just curious if he gets half of what my sister is getting?
i believe that she can keep the finances separate but that would have to be something that she intentionally does and takes steps to ensure no co-mingling of this money with other money.
Inheritances and gifts are by law separate assets, no prenup needed to protect them, but the above post is correct in that once you comingle assets then it becomes “marital property.” I will have a prenup but more than that it’s about keeping everything separate oherwise a prenup doesn’t do that much good. Even if I didn’t have that, I admit to being at a loss of understanding why anyone wouldn’t have their own financial accounts married or not. I can understand the idea of a joint account (wouldn’t make sense for us, I pay the bills) but can’t umderstand not having your own still. I just chuckle about what a nightmare most people’s marriages sound like to me. I can’t imagine asking permission to buy something I want with my money. I’m not 7.
As for my sister I totally agree, I wouldn’t give her any money. She is loaded. She should have enough to live a great life and do pretty much whatever. But if she made bad business decisions or loans to friends (she has done both), she could lose money fast.
I have read a few articles about all the stickiness of this issue regarding wills and inheritance.
It's a divisive issue.
I had ZERO inheritance. Don't see what your issue is.
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