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Old 06-19-2011, 07:56 AM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,393 posts, read 29,697,018 times
Reputation: 14495

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Quote:
Originally Posted by wsop View Post
Isn't that part of your job? And don't most teachers realize before going into teaching that a lot of their work is done OUTSIDE of the time when kids are sitting in class?

You keep going on and on about not having enough time for this or enough time for that, but you seem to have plenty of time to post all over CD every day at all times of the day and night.
It is if I have need to. It's also my job to handle school issues at school if I can. The point is that the parents aren't sitting right there as they are in a doctors office where I can address them in three seconds and I'm not in position to start interrogating parents as to whether or not they feed their child breakfast or make sure they get enough sleep when I do happen to call them. If I happen to be calling home because their child is sleeping in my class, bed times might come up but I will not even call home on most of my students during the year because there won't be issues that can't be resolved at school.

It is not my job to make personal contact with every parent of the 143 students I teach and find out of they fed them breakfast or made sure they put them to bed at a resonable hour. My job is to teach children. I involve parnents when I have to and yes, it is then my job to stay until 7:00 PM and mom and dad are home so I can talk to them. I just don't think I need to be doing that on a regular basis just to find out if their kids eat breakfast or get to bed on time. I leave that up to the parents to handle. I will contact the parents when I have academic or behavioral issues to discuss that cannot be handled at school.

Honestly, most parents would be greatly offended if I called just to interrogate them on how they run their household and tell them how to do it. If they happen to ask me if I think feeding kids breakfast is a good idea, I'll tell them yes. If they happen to ask me what I think is a resonable bed time, I'll tell them. However, these things don't often come up in conversations I have with parents. By the time kids are in the 11th grade, the routine is pretty well set and parents aren't seeking a teacher's advice on bed times.

Because parents don't attend school with their children, it is unresonable to expect me to contact every parent. Many cannot be contacted during the day. I can leave a message but they then cannot contact me after school hours because I do not give out my home phone number and the school does not supply me with a cell phone to allow that kind of contact. I wish they did because that would make parent contacts much easier. I could use said phone from home and not have to worry about getting my house egged.

My point is I have my hands full just doing my job. I don't have time to call each and every parent and make sure they know that things like feeding their kids breakfast, making sure they get enough sleep and making sure they do their homework are good ideas. With 143 students on my roster, that's a bit unreasonable. I call home on the kids I have issues with but I discuss the issue at hand when I do. Whether a child eats breakfast doesn't come up when I'm calling because he hasn't turned in a lab report all semester and is about to fail my class.

In short, I don't think it's my job to contact every parent and make sure they know that things like feeing their kids is a good idea. It's my job to contact a parent when I have an issue I need a parent to resolve. It's also my job to be here for parent teacher conferences whether parents show up or not. Most don't by the time you're at the high school level.

Last edited by Ivorytickler; 06-19-2011 at 08:10 AM..
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Old 06-19-2011, 08:25 AM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
84,959 posts, read 98,776,620 times
Reputation: 31371
Considering the attitudes teachers on this thread have displayed towards parents, I feel like a fool for having tried to communicate with any of them, for going to conferences, etc. From what I get here, all the while they were acting nice, they were thinking what jerks we parents are. We're back to square one!
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Old 06-19-2011, 08:43 AM
 
613 posts, read 807,510 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Katiana View Post
Considering the attitudes teachers on this thread have displayed towards parents, I feel like a fool for having tried to communicate with any of them, for going to conferences, etc. From what I get here, all the while they were acting nice, they were thinking what jerks we parents are. We're back to square one!
Basically they think we're idiots who are capable of doing nothing more than procreating.
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Old 06-19-2011, 08:45 AM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,393 posts, read 29,697,018 times
Reputation: 14495
Quote:
Originally Posted by wsop View Post
Basically they think we're idiots who are capable of doing nothing more than procreating.
Not true. We just expect parents to take care of what parents should take care of. Seriously, if you need me to tell you to feed your child breakfast, you're not doing your job. I'm surprised I was told it's my job to call parents and tell them to feed their kids. You'd think parents would know that kids need to eat given the kids are in the 11th grade by the time they get to me,.

I will admit to wishing parents would do their jobs better. It makes my job tougher when they don't.
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Old 06-19-2011, 09:12 AM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
84,959 posts, read 98,776,620 times
Reputation: 31371
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivorytickler View Post
Not true. We just expect parents to take care of what parents should take care of. Seriously, if you need me to tell you to feed your child breakfast, you're not doing your job. I'm surprised I was told it's my job to call parents and tell them to feed their kids. You'd think parents would know that kids need to eat given the kids are in the 11th grade by the time they get to me,.

I will admit to wishing parents would do their jobs better. It makes my job tougher when they don't.
DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT twist my words like that, Ivory! I gave a simple example of something you could talk to parents about when the opportunity presented itself, e.g. conferences. Quit making fun of me. You do know that breakfast is the most frequently skipped meal and that many adults skip breakfast as well?
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Old 06-19-2011, 11:26 AM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,393 posts, read 29,697,018 times
Reputation: 14495
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katiana View Post
DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT twist my words like that, Ivory! I gave a simple example of something you could talk to parents about when the opportunity presented itself, e.g. conferences. Quit making fun of me. You do know that breakfast is the most frequently skipped meal and that many adults skip breakfast as well?
I did not twist your words one bit. You said them. Go look. In fact, you gave this specific example of something I should be telling the parents of my students. Obviously, you think it's my job to inform parents what their job is. The problem with this is I'd have to first interrogate the parents to find out what they are/are not doing before I can tell them how to do it right. It's not like they're coming to me for nutrtional advice on, oh, say a medical condition they are just learning about.

You're oblivious to the differences between a doctors visit and a phone call from a teacher. It is, absolutely, inappropriate for me to dig around and ask whether parents are feeding their child breakfast, getting them to bed on time, making sure they're doing their homework, etc, etc, etc...and will create a hostile relationship between parent and teacher BESIDES the fact I don't have the time for it.

Yes, I'm aware that breakfast is the most skipped meal of the day. That's why PARENTS should make sure their children eat. It's the PARENTS job. Or are you saying that parents are too ignorant to know that breakfast is important and the most skipped meal of the day? I knew this before I became a parent or a teacher. My doctor didn't have to tell me and neither did my children's teacher. Now, the doctor might suggest dietary changes but that is part of the doctor's job. It is NOT part of the teacher's job.

Seriously, if my children's teacher called me and inquired as to whether or not I feed them breakfast, without cause, I'd be offended. It is not her place.

Parents need to do the job of parenting. If they don't know how to parent, they need to talk to people like doctors and nutritionists not the high school chemistry teacher. I call parents regarding issues that are appropriate for a high school chemistry teacher to call parents regarding. Inquiring as to whether their child eats what I consider an adequate breakfast and gets what I consider an adequate amount of sleep is a bit overboard. I have inquired about study habits but I, often, get my head bit off over that. Usually, when I suggest a student needs to study more, I'm told they're studying all they can. That the material is too hard for them and studying more will not work....they also pass on tutoring and other suggestions I have. Parents do not take kindly to teachers telling them how to parent. Now, when parents come to me for advice, that's a different story but me cold calling to dig about how they handle their child at home will not be welcome in the slightest.

Last edited by Ivorytickler; 06-19-2011 at 11:42 AM..
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Old 06-19-2011, 11:37 AM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
84,959 posts, read 98,776,620 times
Reputation: 31371
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivorytickler View Post
I did not twist your words one bit. You said them. Go look. Yes, you gave one example. Obviously, you think it's my job to inform parents what their job is. The problem with this is I'd have to first interrogate the parents to find out what they are/are not doing before I can tell them how to do it right. It's not like they're coming to me for nutrtional advice on, oh, say a medical condition they are just learning about.

You're oblivious to the differences between a doctors visit and a phone call from a teacher. It is, absolutely, inappropriate for me to dig around and ask whether parents are feeding their child breakfast, getting them to bed on time, making sure they're doing their homework, etc, etc, etc...and will create a hostile relationship between parent and teacher BESIDES the fact I don't have the time for it.

Yes, I'm aware that breakfast is the most skipped meal of the day. That's why PARENTS should make sure their children eat. It's the PARENTS job. Or are you saying that parents are too stupid to know that breakfast is important and the most skipped meal of the day? I knew this before I became a parent or a teacher. My doctor didn't have to tell me and neither did my children's teacher. Now, the doctor might suggest dietary changes but that is part of the doctor's job. It is NOT part of the teacher's job.

Seriously, if my children's teacher called me and inquired as to whether or not I feed them breakfast, without cause, I'd be offended. I can see their doctor asking but not their teacher.
I sure as hell never said you should go calling parents and telling them to give their kids breakfast. The rest of the above post is totally irrelevant to the point I'm trying to make, and it seems you'r being deliberately obtuse.

Give up with the breakfast thing! I used it because I thought it would be simple to illustrate. Like many, you got hung up in the example instead of the point, which was that maybe you should look at whatever problems you think are the parent's fault from a different perspective, that is, that the parents really do want their kids to succeed in your class. If they're missing too much class for sports, maybe that should be pointed out to them. Maybe they have no idea Junior is missing so much class, and that he can't really teach himself the material he's missing. I refuse to discuss breakfast again.
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Old 06-19-2011, 12:00 PM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,393 posts, read 29,697,018 times
Reputation: 14495
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katiana View Post
I sure as hell never said you should go calling parents and telling them to give their kids breakfast. The rest of the above post is totally irrelevant to the point I'm trying to make, and it seems you'r being deliberately obtuse.

Give up with the breakfast thing! I used it because I thought it would be simple to illustrate. Like many, you got hung up in the example instead of the point, which was that maybe you should look at whatever problems you think are the parent's fault from a different perspective, that is, that the parents really do want their kids to succeed in your class. If they're missing too much class for sports, maybe that should be pointed out to them. Maybe they have no idea Junior is missing so much class, and that he can't really teach himself the material he's missing. I refuse to discuss breakfast again.
And I quote "giving the kids a breakfast before they go to school is what's best, tell the parents "Kids learn better when they've had something to eat" in the morning. If a student is missing too many classes due to sports, tell the parents you think the kid would do better if s/he were in class more. I know I'm being simplistic, but hopefully some get my point. I also think that teachers (those that do this) should quit reviewing on a daily basis what is "wrong" with parents."

If I am not doing this when I call the parents, when am I doing it seeing as I don't see the parents with the children at school????? Exactly when do I inform them that they need to feed their kids and make sure they're in school???? My only contact with parents, who don't come to parent teacher conferences is to call. Hence the assumption I'd need to call Do you not get that I do not see the parents in question when I see their children? IF the parents come to parent teacher conferences, and most don't, I see them in November and again in April. So, do tell, WHEN am I supposed to inform parents on how to parent if I'm not calling them to do it?????? UGH....this is like talking to a brick wall.

Um, it was YOUR chosen example. And no, I get the point, I'm just trying to figure out when I'm supposed to do this since you're now telling me I'm NOT supposed to do it by calling the parents. WHEN do you think I see these parents??????? When am I supposed to tell them to feed their kids, make sure they get sleep and attend class or whatever it is you think I need to tell them because they don't know?????? You really don't get it, do you? Parents don't come to school with their children. If I do contact parents it's outside of normal school hours and, usually, by phone.

You say I don't get what you're saying so please clarify. Exactly what am I supposed to be informing parents of regarding their parenting duties and when/how am I supposed to do it?????
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Old 06-19-2011, 12:49 PM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
84,959 posts, read 98,776,620 times
Reputation: 31371
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivorytickler View Post
And I quote "giving the kids a breakfast before they go to school is what's best, tell the parents "Kids learn better when they've had something to eat" in the morning. If a student is missing too many classes due to sports, tell the parents you think the kid would do better if s/he were in class more. I know I'm being simplistic, but hopefully some get my point. I also think that teachers (those that do this) should quit reviewing on a daily basis what is "wrong" with parents."

If I am not doing this when I call the parents, when am I doing it seeing as I don't see the parents with the children at school????? Exactly when do I inform them that they need to feed their kids and make sure they're in school???? My only contact with parents, who don't come to parent teacher conferences is to call. Hence the assumption I'd need to call Do you not get that I do not see the parents in question when I see their children? IF the parents come to parent teacher conferences, and most don't, I see them in November and again in April. So, do tell, WHEN am I supposed to inform parents on how to parent if I'm not calling them to do it?????? UGH....this is like talking to a brick wall.

Um, it was YOUR chosen example. And no, I get the point, I'm just trying to figure out when I'm supposed to do this since you're now telling me I'm NOT supposed to do it by calling the parents. WHEN do you think I see these parents??????? When am I supposed to tell them to feed their kids, make sure they get sleep and attend class or whatever it is you think I need to tell them because they don't know?????? You really don't get it, do you? Parents don't come to school with their children. If I do contact parents it's outside of normal school hours and, usually, by phone.

You say I don't get what you're saying so please clarify. Exactly what am I supposed to be informing parents of regarding their parenting duties and when/how am I supposed to do it?????
Forget it, Ivory! You're right about everything. Parents hate their kids, don't want the best for them, would never appreciate a word AT CONFERENCE TIME, or Back to school night, or whenever, about what they need to do to do well in your class. Other professionals don't know how hard teaching is, don't work hard themselves, have much easier jobs than teachers, get way more respect than teachers (try telling that to a nurse, oh wait, you have), etc.
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Old 06-19-2011, 01:22 PM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,393 posts, read 29,697,018 times
Reputation: 14495
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katiana View Post
Forget it, Ivory! You're right about everything. Parents hate their kids, don't want the best for them, would never appreciate a word AT CONFERENCE TIME, or Back to school night, or whenever, about what they need to do to do well in your class. Other professionals don't know how hard teaching is, don't work hard themselves, have much easier jobs than teachers, get way more respect than teachers (try telling that to a nurse, oh wait, you have), etc.
I never said I know everything but I do know when I see or don't see my student's parents a little better than you do.

I've already told you that most parents don't come to conferences, which are only twice a year. They also don't come to back to school night (I see about 5 parents per class on back to school night and maybe 30 total at parent teacher conferences and it's pretty much the same 30). There is no whenever. I either call or there is no contact.

And the parents who show up to back to school night and parent teacher conferences aren't the ones I need to tell how to parent if I were inclined to tell my student's parents how to parent. They are, usually, the parents whose kids are getting A's and they want to know how to keep the A or they're getting B's and they want to know how to make them A's. The ones I need to see are the ones who are getting D's and E's in my class but they, as a general rule, don't show up.

You really need to buy a clue. While you have the opportunity to talk to parents every time you see a young patient, I do not. I, rarely, have the opportunity to talk to my student's parents and, usually, when I do, I've placed the call.
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