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Old 06-12-2011, 07:26 AM
 
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My daughter has a May birthday.

She is 3 yo now but will be 5 and 3 months when she will qualify for Kindergarten in a few years. If I want to keep her in pre-K another year and enroll her in K at 6 and 3 months, would that be legal? Would that make her a "too old" kindergartner?

She seems like a very normal, well adjusted child, with all developmental milestones in place. Interestingly though, compared to my almost 6 yo son (suspected of a mild Asperger syndrome) her verbal abilities are not as spectacular, though still within normal range for her age.
Both children are bilingual - but while my son was going to town in both languages at her age, she does better in my native language (the one she was most exposed to at home) and less well in English.

If this pattern continues, I anticipate she might benefit from a delayed start in K. Would I be able to it - legally speaking?

Thank you!
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Old 06-12-2011, 09:59 AM
 
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If your child will be 5 in May before she begins Kindergarten in Aug/Sept, she should 'be fine. Most school systems have datelines for Kindergarten enrollment. You might consider a good Pre-K program for the year before your child begins regular K'garten, especially if he/she has not been in any form of day-care. As both an educator and a parent, I would see no reason to delay kindergarten enrollment another year if your child will be 5 in May before school begins.
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Old 06-12-2011, 11:06 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by syracusa View Post
My daughter has a May birthday.

She is 3 yo now but will be 5 and 3 months when she will qualify for Kindergarten in a few years. If I want to keep her in pre-K another year and enroll her in K at 6 and 3 months, would that be legal? Would that make her a "too old" kindergartner?

She seems like a very normal, well adjusted child, with all developmental milestones in place. Interestingly though, compared to my almost 6 yo son (suspected of a mild Asperger syndrome) her verbal abilities are not as spectacular, though still within normal range for her age.
Both children are bilingual - but while my son was going to town in both languages at her age, she does better in my native language (the one she was most exposed to at home) and less well in English.

If this pattern continues, I anticipate she might benefit from a delayed start in K. Would I be able to it - legally speaking?

Thank you!
I'm pretty sure you are allowed to delay for a year. She would probably be the oldest student in her class if you do, though. That can be problematic. On the other hand, she'll be one of the younger ones (although probably not the youngest) if you send her when she is 5. That also has risks. As a former elem teacher I can say the youngest children did struggle, although it was usually late summer and early fall bdays, not May. You know your child best - if you think she is going to struggle in K, then it might be a good idea to wait a year. It wouldn't be unheard of. The big problem with being older is that kids can become self-conscious about it, especially if they are bigger than the other kids. Around 4th or 5th grade it can become a real problem for girls if they "develop" before their peers.
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Old 06-12-2011, 11:26 AM
 
Location: Boerne area
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Depends on where you live. Here in Texas - all over the state - it is common to 'red-shirt' kids and delay the start of kindergarten. Also, the cutoff date differs per state - in Texas it is 5 by August 31st. So, in Texas, I would estimate that at least 75% of kids with summer birthdays are held the extra year....they are 6 when they begin K. A May b-day here is a little more iffy.....maybe 25% of kids w/ May b/days are held.

Legally, IDK the answer to your question, only if there was any enforcement a whole bunch of people would be in trouble.

It is much easier to delay start of school vs holding a child back to repeat a grade. If there is doubt about whether the child is ready, IMO it is better to delay. Usually around here the big debate is whether to hold a summer b/day. Of those parents whose children have summer b/days, those that send their kids 'on time' (they are the youngest in the grade) - about half have no problems their entire school career. But half do have problems - maybe not in K/1st, but 3rd, or transitioning to MS, or HS - somewhere along the way K-12 they have issues either socially or academically.

But of those parents who have held their kids from starting, so that they are older - I have not personally met any parent who regrets that decision.

All of the above is anecdotal. BTW, my son has an Aug 25th b/day. We delayed him a year - he will be in 2nd grade this year, and I know we made the right decision.
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Old 06-12-2011, 11:34 AM
 
Location: Over There
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Cool Kinder at 6 is fine.

Quote:
Originally Posted by syracusa View Post
My daughter has a May birthday.

She is 3 yo now but will be 5 and 3 months when she will qualify for Kindergarten in a few years. If I want to keep her in pre-K another year and enroll her in K at 6 and 3 months, would that be legal? Would that make her a "too old" kindergartner?

She seems like a very normal, well adjusted child, with all developmental milestones in place. Interestingly though, compared to my almost 6 yo son (suspected of a mild Asperger syndrome) her verbal abilities are not as spectacular, though still within normal range for her age.
Both children are bilingual - but while my son was going to town in both languages at her age, she does better in my native language (the one she was most exposed to at home) and less well in English.

If this pattern continues, I anticipate she might benefit from a delayed start in K. Would I be able to it - legally speaking?

Thank you!
Most school districts, schools, and teachers will embrace the fact that you want your daughter to be better prepared for kindergarten.
Laws that apply to school enrollment don't specify that she has to be in kindergarten--just in school--by a certain age.
In most areas kindergarten is not legally required, but nearly all children do attend kindergarten.
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Old 06-12-2011, 12:57 PM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
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I have a daughter with a July birthday and we sent her when she turned 5. She graduated in the top 10% of her class and is now in grad school. A good friend has 3 boys, one with a July bd, and two with August birthdays; she sent all of them when they turned 5, all did very well in school and two have now graduated from a competitive college and have good jobs.

I know two kids in the same family who were held back, one with a June birthday and one with a July BD. By high school, both were a little old for their classmates, and the younger one took summer school classes so she could graduate when she should have.

Of course, this is all anecdotal. However, based on lots of observation of my/my friends and acquaintances kids, I'd say, start her when she should start.
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Old 06-12-2011, 01:07 PM
 
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Check with the laws for your state. I believe you often can, though. I agree with the poster who said it may become an issue when she starts developing. Also, if she's average or taller than average in height, it may make her feel more out of place.

Another thing to consider is that it's not uncommon for bilingual children to seem delayed at first, but they catch up within a few years of starting to speak. So she's 3 now... I would wait and reevaluate when she's 5. It may not even be an issue by then. Yes, you can compare her to your son, but they are different kids. Your son may be unusually strong in verbal skills and she may be right on track--not necessarily deficient.
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Old 06-12-2011, 03:06 PM
 
Location: BK All Day
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There where a few people I graduated high school with who had may birthdays and where a year older. I was held back in the 2nd grade and I have an august birthday so I too was older. I think it makes a world of difference. And then when you get older you get to do everything first! Like drive, vote and drink.

My college roommate was held back because she was foreign when she moved here and spoke little english. She has a January birthday.
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Old 06-12-2011, 03:25 PM
 
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Legally speaking, Kindergarten itself is not even required in most states. The majority of the states require children to be attending school by the either the age of 6 or the age of 7, while very few require it at age 5. So check your states requirements.

Regarding when to start K, it's best to wait until the summer before K to make the decision because they change so much in even just a 5-6 month span. A child who seems ready for K might become highly insecure a few months before, while a child who seems way behind their peers may just 'get it' all suddenly in July right before time to start.

Then, you must absolutely consider down the road how it might affect her. Physical things like height, puberty will play a factor in how she fits in later along with dating and driving. Sports, school clubs or even graduation can be affected in the long run.

Will starting her at 6 put her inches above everyone in her grade level, which might make her very self conscious? Might she start her period, develop breasts and such a couple of years ahead of most of her classmates, possibly embarrassing her? Will she be wanting to date in 6th or 7th grade while others are not yet ready or able? Or driving in the summer before 10th grade while others have to wait another year, therefore she becomes the designated driver amongst her friends?

Being older than most in high school she might be a natural leader amongst her peers, or she might feel too old to do what they are doing where a year apart seems like a much bigger gap than it did back in elementary school. She would also be 18 her whole senior year and even turn 19 before graduation. That could be a good thing or not so much.

It is about far more than just this one year. We can all find anecdotes for and against starting early, on time or late.

My son's best friend was one of only 2 in the kindergarten class whose parents held back a year in (not anywhere near 75% an earlier poster remarked upon). While he may be ahead academically, which he should be, he is still one of the most insecure and immature kids in the class. There were also 2 girls who repeated Kindergarten and it was a major problem for one of the two...but that's a whole different topic. lol
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Old 06-12-2011, 05:33 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Katiana View Post
I By high school, both were a little old for their classmates,
I don't see many disadvantages in that. Am I missing any?

PS: OK, hypocore spelled them out, thanks.
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