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Old 08-28-2011, 05:35 AM
 
11,151 posts, read 13,799,189 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MaryleeII View Post
Many of the parents that teachers despise so much are working much harder than they (the teacher) does.
I don't know any of my colleagues who despise parents. Apparently the opposite isn't true, unfortunately.

The best gifts I've ever received? Handmade "cards" and notes from my students, thanking me for something or other and/or saying they'll miss me as they move on to other teachers. I have them displayed around my work space (not in my classroom), and on those occasions when I'm stressed out -- or feeling low because some parent thinks I'm a greedy, overpaid, underworked failure of a human being -- I can look at them and remind myself that someone appreciates my efforts.
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Old 08-28-2011, 08:20 AM
 
5,748 posts, read 10,507,010 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnHenrySDM View Post
How many Chinese parents stay up at night, tossing and turning over etiquette indiscretions committed by overpaid teachers?

But back to the apples. Does anyone else wonder how far the OP's apple has fallen from the OP tree? I'd guess not very. For better or worse, they rarely fall far. Now what are the chances the next generatipon will somehow have more respect for, or put more value into, or be more obliging of, the teachers and the time they spend with our kids?
Indeed. I spent most of my youngest's third grade year tied in knots over a teacher. After an embarassing public meltdown and disasterous confrontation with the school principal, it finally dawned on me that I was putting all my time and energy into the wrong person. On top of that, my anger was affecting my son, so I got myself out of volunteering (being in the building fed my frustration), avoided venting sessions with other parents, and hired a wonderful tutor to act as a go-between with his teacher. Things really turned around once I acknowledged my role in the drama, stopped looking for reasons to be angry, and committed to helping my child.

Last edited by formercalifornian; 08-28-2011 at 09:41 AM..
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Old 08-28-2011, 10:10 AM
 
5,748 posts, read 10,507,010 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pumpkin5 View Post
Those fundraising products you are asked to sell actually fund many programs at your school for your child and helps purchase extra supplies so we do not have to beg again when the supplies run out in middle of the year.
Our neighborhood elementary school asks for pledges, rather than having a fund-raiser. Compliance is nearly 100%, and many families give more than the suggested donation. When my oldest started middle school and the magazine sales fund-raiser packet came home, we opted out and simply wrote a pledge check. Best part is that the school gets ALL of the money.

As for elementary teacher gifts, we typically donated $10-$20 to a class gift for the holidays and at the end of the year, along with a personal note of gratitude.

Last edited by formercalifornian; 08-28-2011 at 10:19 AM..
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Old 08-28-2011, 10:43 AM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,393 posts, read 29,717,492 times
Reputation: 14499
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dark of the Moon View Post
I don't know any of my colleagues who despise parents. Apparently the opposite isn't true, unfortunately.

The best gifts I've ever received? Handmade "cards" and notes from my students, thanking me for something or other and/or saying they'll miss me as they move on to other teachers. I have them displayed around my work space (not in my classroom), and on those occasions when I'm stressed out -- or feeling low because some parent thinks I'm a greedy, overpaid, underworked failure of a human being -- I can look at them and remind myself that someone appreciates my efforts.
ITA. The first year I taught, an English teacher gave the kids an assignment to write a thank you letter to the teacher who helped them the most. I treasure mine. I also have a novelty pen that says "Genius at Work" given to me by one of my special ed kids. He told me I was the smartest person he knew. These are great to take out and look at when I'm having a rough spell and wondering if this is all worth it.

Even high school teachers need a thank you now and again.
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Old 08-28-2011, 10:46 AM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,393 posts, read 29,717,492 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by formercalifornian View Post
Our neighborhood elementary school asks for pledges, rather than having a fund-raiser. Compliance is nearly 100%, and many families give more than the suggested donation. When my oldest started middle school and the magazine sales fund-raiser packet came home, we opted out and simply wrote a pledge check. Best part is that the school gets ALL of the money.

snipped
I love this idea. I HATE asking family members to buy useless junk at three times the price. I'd rather just make a contribution.

Some of the private schools have a buy out level. If the family contributes X dollars, they don't have to do fund raisers. I'd rather pledge $20 a month for the year than have to sell candy or candles that someone is making a huge profit on.
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Old 08-28-2011, 10:49 AM
 
Location: Happy in Utah
1,224 posts, read 2,942,178 times
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I send class supplies in the middle of the school year( you do not have to buy supplies ) that is when my mom allways seemed to run out when she teached. I help out when I can, send extra money for donations when kids go on field trips(another thing my mom would pay out of pocket when kids would show up with no money). I honestly think Utah teachers have it pretty bad, very large class sizes and little help with anything, no real resources for special needs children.
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Old 08-28-2011, 11:24 AM
 
214 posts, read 589,545 times
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Requesting personal gifts for paid public employees is classless, unprofessional, and in many states, a violation of state ethics laws. In my Massachusetts district, individual gifts to teachers have recently been limited to $50.00 from an individual, and $150.00 from a group, for the entire school year. And individuals soliciting group gifts CANNOT list donors names. There are NO LIMITS to how much parents can give in classroom supplies or items to be used in the classroom.

This law still hasn't stopped some room moms from attempting to extort money from parents for personal gifts for the teacher. In most cases, this type of behavior reflects poory on the administration and the character and integrity of the teachers expecting these "gifts". For any public school employee to be standing around with their hand out looking for money and presents for doing their job, when so many of their students' parents are struggling financially, being laid off, losing their homes to foreclosure....is mind boggling. It's the absolute epitome of bad taste and boorish behavior.

I know some teachers who refuse personal gifts, and make suggestions for classroom donations instead; this solves the problem of teachers spending so much of their personal income on supplies, and allows parents to show their appreciation in an affordable way that helps all the students. One of my favorite teachers, when asked what she wanted for Christmas gift, asked that a donation be made to a local food bank in her name....she was a talented professional, an extraordinary educator, and a class act.

The professional educators that I know all say the same thing, with regard to showing "appreciation" for their efforts; there is nothing more meaningful than a heartfelt personal note from a parent, or even a child, thanking them for making a difference. I know a child who was retained in second grade, who at the end of the year, excited that he succeeded and would be going on to third grade, drew his teacher a picture, with the caption..."Thank for for Believing in Me." It meant more to that teacher than any mall gift certificate.

Perhaps these teachers need a class in good manners as part of their "professional developement"....I know lots of room mothers who do.
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Old 08-28-2011, 12:39 PM
 
Location: Middle America
35,821 posts, read 39,387,870 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MaryleeII View Post
BTW, all that crap drops out when kids go to middle school. The kid simply has too many teachers, no one is his homeroom teacher, they can't reasonably expect a gift from each student. Also, room mothers disappear in middle school, it gets more real.

Lets face it, teaching is a difficult profession, but so are most professions. Name a job that's easy? Many of the parents that teachers despise so much are working much harder than they (the teacher) does.
Wow, do you ever post anything that's not hateful? Get a grip.
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Old 08-28-2011, 01:41 PM
 
102 posts, read 144,106 times
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Writing about education or teachers and trying to make generalizations is about as valid as thinking the weather where I am is any indication of the weather all across the country. I've taught in different areas. Some schools provide supplies, some don't, some have active parents, some don't. Some want parents to volunteer, others keep them as far away as possible. Some teachers work insane hours and others CAN do a good job in 35 hours a week.

It sounds as though your school has some parents with extra time on their hands who go overboard. Simply nicely (!) decline their requests. Or nicely express your concerns -- hold on to your hat here -- to the teacher.

Your attitude will affect your child's attitude. How about modeling calm, respectful communication? I would venture a guess that it's a rare and truly awful teacher who would retaliate against a child when a parent says, "I'm happy to help with basic supplies (or whatever) but our family is opting out of the gifts."
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Old 08-28-2011, 02:09 PM
 
29 posts, read 39,002 times
Reputation: 20
Well i would never beg for gifts cuz thats not me but most teachers do have to pay for stuff out of pocket just keep that in mind. I was already a sub for a whole year and pay for stuff out ofbpocket and i got nothing no bday gift christmas not even when my grandma passed so..
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