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I have a 9 year old daughter and this is what we do.
*We read to her every night, almost from birth. Now she reads on her own every night. Sometimes she will still like to read to me and that is a good time to connect.
*I volunteer as much as possible at her school. This shows her I find school just as important.
*I monitor her homework to make sure it gets done. She does her homework at the kitchen table, with no distractions such as radio or TV. If the phone rings, it goes to voice mail.
*I am in contact with her teacher. We go to parent/teacher conferences.
*We talk every day about her day at school. That includes the whole, so n so doesn't like so n so, etc... It can be trying at times to listen to that kind of stuff, but that is also part of their day at school. I want her to know that I am interested.
*As another poster said, don't always believe the teacher over your child. I'm glad I didn't, because had I believed her teacher my childs 3rd grade year would have been horrible.
Basically if you don't show interest in your childs education they won't be interested. You need to show them that you value education and require them to do their best. I have always told my daughter that if she does her absolute best and gets a C that's fine, but if she doesn't study and thinks she can "get by" and gets a C, then there will be consequences.
To them, with them. Actively create an environment where reading is a big part of life.
Tabularasa and another poster got it right exactly. Developing a passion for reading is most important. It starts with reading to your children as early as they show an interest. It requires always having a variety of books in the house to stimulate their interest. It means taking them to the library to check out books and visiting bookstores. Children should see their parents reading and it might make sense to turn the TV and video games off and having a family reading time. It is also important to have a newspaper and at least one news or science oriented magazine subscription. The last item is dinner table conversation of world events regardless of wether it is politics, science, medical news, current events, history or books they are reading. I have heard kids say they don't like to read. It is because they have never learned to read for pleasure and they associate reading only with something they are forced to do in school. We have an unacceptable percentage of students graduating from high school who can barely read and don't understand what they read.
Stone, be patient with them. Do not believe a teacher over your own kids. Realize that teachers, though they have a difficult job are not all there just out of their love for kids, but they are needing it for an income and don't side with them as if they are "the law."
Keep it in mind that YOU are the boss of your kids' welfare and stay involved in how your kids feel ABOUT school. Always ask if they are being bullied and I mean by any adults as well as other students in their schools. It's worse than "a dog eat dog" world out there, now.
Don't pressure your kids to make certain grades on their report cards. Tell them it's all about being prepared to support themselves and be happy in life. It's not about impressing society and becoming what others think they should.
This world is getting nuttier every year and remember that your kids are, by attending school being forced to mix with, and sometimes very closely mix with the worst, as well as the best families' kids. Have compassion on them for putting up with it all.
Don't just care if they do their homework but care how they feel about being in school, etc.
I agree with everything but the statement in blue. Why shouldnt the kids be encouraged to make excellent grades. I wont tolerate that in my home. The children than earn all As do not have two heads on their neck so i will work hard to ensure my child(ren) maximize their potential.
I agree with everything but the statement in blue. Why shouldnt the kids be encouraged to make excellent grades. I wont tolerate that in my home. The children than earn all As do not have two heads on their neck so i will work hard to ensure my child(ren) maximize their potential.
While I agree that having good grades is important, I would rather have my kid get a bad grade on a test (or whatever) than get a good grade and not have an understanding of the content on the test. Similarly, I would rather my kid get a C in AP Chemistry (or any other hard class, just used AP Chem because it's generally regarded as a very hard AP class) than get an A+ in foods class or something...
While I agree that having good grades is important, I would rather have my kid get a bad grade on a test (or whatever) than get a good grade and not have an understanding of the content on the test. Similarly, I would rather my kid get a C in AP Chemistry (or any other hard class, just used AP Chem because it's generally regarded as a very hard AP class) than get an A+ in foods class or something...
I dont follow. Are you implying that the straight A students dont have a full understanding of the subject matter? mm ok, i'll leave that alone. But FYI, there are children that earn A+ in the same AP Chemistry or Calculus classes you are referring to, why are you setting the standards so low for your child(ren)?
I dont follow. Are you implying that the straight A students dont have a full understanding of the subject matter? mm ok, i'll leave that alone. But FYI, there are children that earn A+ in the same AP Chemistry or Calculus classes you are referring to, why are you setting the standards so low for your child(ren)?
So a student earning a B is a low standard? I have had/known 2 students in my 33 year teaching career commit suicide because they didn't earn straight A's which was the only grade their parents would allow.... just some food for thought.
So a student earning a B is a low standard? I have had/known 2 students in my 33 year teaching career commit suicide because they didn't earn straight A's which was the only grade their parents would allow.... just some food for thought.
Read the post i responded to carefully and then read mine, AGAIN! She said she'd rather her kid get a C in AP Chemistry than an A in food class. What i was arguing is that with a little more effort on both the kid and her part, her child would be capable of getting an A in both classes. Your story about kids committing suicide is sad but has absolutely NOTHING to do with what we are discussing.
my suggestion would be more toward personal responsibility of the child to succeed and you putting the environment in the home to where education and hard work are valued.
I agree with everything but the statement in blue. Why shouldnt the kids be encouraged to make excellent grades. I wont tolerate that in my home. The children than earn all As do not have two heads on their neck so i will work hard to ensure my child(ren) maximize their potential.
Encouragement is different than pressuring, browbeating, and punishing.
Working to the best of one's abilities is key. But not every child is capable of being an "A" student in all areas. Encouraging children to work to their highest potential is obviously a great thing to do, but parents get into trouble when they overestimate that potential. If my kid works her butt off and struggles to get a "B" I'm sure not going to berate her for not getting the "A," I'm going to let her know that I'm proud of her work.
Standards are fine, but not everyone is born with the same abilities. I teach special education. I expect people to do the best work they can with the tools available to them, but I am very realistic that not everyone is born with the same toolbox at his or her disposal, and this doesn't just apply to those with disabilities. Everyone has skills in different areas. Also bear in mind that the way skill acquisition is assessed in the average public school isn't always necessarily indicative of what all individuals have learned.
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mm ok, i'll leave that alone. But FYI, there are children that earn A+ in the same AP Chemistry or Calculus classes you are referring to, why are you setting the standards so low for your child(ren)?
She said she'd rather her kid get a C in AP Chemistry than an A in food class. What i was arguing is that with a little more effort on both the kid and her part, her child would be capable of getting an A in both classes. Your story about kids committing suicide is sad but has absolutely NOTHING to do with what we are discussing. 
